Blood Stained Breaths
by xox-'.'-K-A-G-O-M-E-'.'-xox
Summary: Starts off with a mission gone wrong, Naruto is injured. The rest of Team 7 are attacked again, what will happen to Sasuke and co. as Naruto lies unconscious? A damaged seal, a broken bond and something is lost that can't be replaced. SasuNaru
1. Chapter 1

_Hi there!~ Um, this is an idea I had and I got this far and I'm not sure if I want to continue it or not. Currently I have no inspiration whatsoever so I'm not sure about this thing but if you like it and want more please let me know. =] Im thinking SasuNaru, anyone else?_

_Click the review button. Do it!_

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**Blood Stained Breaths**

"Kakashi sensei! Naruto, he's-" Thunder clapped loudly and the rain started coming down faster. Sakura's screams were cut off as Kakashi swooped in, catching her in his arms.

"Sasuke," he instructed. The raven haired boy nodded and rushed to Naruto's side. He carefully scooped up the unconscious boy and raced after Kakashi, his quick feet sinking in to the muddy ground. They left the corpse in the rain. Kakashi lead Sasuke toward an old barn across the field. The grass was quickly being covered by gray water; soon both ninja were running across a thin layer of rain.

Naruto was heavy in Sasuke's arms. He tried not to look down, knowing what would meet his gaze. Sakura's pink hair; dull in the hazy rain caught his eye from where she was being cradled in Kakashi's arms. Her green eyes were wide and she was staring at Naruto in horror. Water that may have been tears or may have been rain, streaked down her face. Sasuke chanced a look down too. The boy's face was deathly pale, his skin stained with black-red blood, his orange jacket and black shirt ripped open, the wound in his stomach ragged and deep, cutting through the top of the orange seal around his belly button. Sasuke felt his heartbeat quicken in panic. Dark worry bubbled in his throat. Quickly flicking his eyes away he sped up, the barn in sight.

...

"He just... threw himself in front of Kousuke..." murmured Sakura. The two males stared at her. They sat close together, trying to hear the girl's recount over the brutal rain on the barn roof. "The sword went straight through both of them... Kousuke... From what I saw was hit higher, in the chest, in his..." she trailed off, her shocked eyes staring past Sasuke and Kakashi. Sakura's thin frame began to shake as she started to sob. The young Uchiha's eyes left her and came to rest on his blonde team mate. He watched his chest rise and fall in uneven shallow breaths. The bandages were no longer a pristine white.

It had been a simple escort mission. Team 7 were supposed to safely deliver the Mizukage's son, Kousuke, to his home land after his visit to the village hidden in the leaves. But they had been ambushed and forced into unexpected combat with ninja far too skilled for the three youngest members to deal with. Sasuke and Kakashi had quickly and expertly been separated from Naruto, Sakura and Kousuke. The battle had been fast paced and deathly. Both sharingan users had tried desperately to regroup but the enemy had relentlessly pushed them further and further away.

According to Sakura, they were attacked and she and Naruto had fiercely defended Kousuke. Naruto had drawn on Kyuubi's power a moment before one of the other ninja had come at them wielding a thick bladed katana. He leapt in front of the other young man as he pushed Sakura to the side. Kousuke had been killed.

Sasuke could picture it. Naruto, in blur of blonde hair and orange chakra would have recklessly thrown himself in front of Kousuke as the ninja crouched low to put more power into the attack. The blade would have pierced their bodies in a swift movement. In Sasuke's mind's eye, Kousuke's head fell onto Naruto's shoulder, his eyes blank and wide open, blood trailing from his mouth. The ninja would have smiled as he dragged the katana out, blood flying out in the sudden movement, splattering Sakura as he made his escape and Naruto fell to the ground.

"Sasuke," called Kakashi. "We need to get into the loft or we'll get flooded." Sasuke nodded and gently gathered Naruto against him. The blonde's head lolled drunkenly and his eyelids fluttered. Sasuke felt a low moan rumble through Naruto and into his own chest. He clenched his jaw as the blonde's face crumpled in pain, his fingers coming to grip the front of Sasuke's navy shirt as they leapt into the loft.

It was warmer among the rafters. Sakura was sleeping, her breathing deep and worn out. Rain-washed blood was faintly painted all over the side of her face and the length of one of her arms. Kakashi was slumped against the wall next to her, his one visible eye closed. Sleeping. Maybe. In the gloom, the young man crawled until he was crouched by the other boy's bloodied side. Naruto's usually tanned face was a pallid white making the strange whiskered scars stand out vividly. Sasuke leant over him, his ear next to his mouth, listening to his laboured breathing. Turning his head, he brought his mouth close to Naruto's. Calm, stable, breath mingled with shallow gasps as he watched the unconscious boy from steady, black eyes.

"You can do this Naruto," he said. "Wake up." The raven haired boy's words were lost under the loud rumble of distant thunder. For a moment his carefully placed mask of indifference slipped. His eyebrows came together in a frown. Wake up... The body beneath him stirred and the tension on it's childish face eased slightly. Sasuke smiled miserably.

"You'll definitely pull through, right dobe?" he murmured as he pressed his cold fingertips to his best friend's burning forehead. Eyelids fluttered again. Naruto groaned through clenched teeth.


	2. Chapter 2

_Hello! I had some encouraging reviews so I decided to carry on with this. Bear with me, I'm not quite sure where it's going but hopefully you guys like it! Enjoy!_

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Kakashi had been on his guard the whole night, listening and trying to single out noises from under the beat of the rain which had eased of and was now a gentle drumming on the tin roof. Watching through his eyelashes, he had seen Sasuke kneel over Naruto in the night, breathing on him, a broken look on his face.

He feels responsible, thought the copy-cat ninja. Slowly he surveyed his subordinates.

Sakura, next to him, was still sleeping, her face pulled into a delicate frown. Naruto and the Mizukage's son's blood on her face. She was a mess. Naruto had apparently thrown her out of the way before he was stabbed. She felt useless again. One day she would realize that she was one of the things that kept the other's so strong. She was their girl. Their girl who they had to protect no matter what.

Naruto, on his back lay near Kakashi's feet, his breathing normal now. Bloodied hands were fists at his sides, his jaw clenched slightly. Wrinkles appeared on his mask as Kakashi shook his head in disbelief, smiling a little. Naruto truly was a great ninja. Stupid, annoying and hasty, but great. He'd be ok.

Sasuke, on the ground next to Naruto with his fingers reaching out in his sleep, close to the other boys face. The guilty aura around the Uchiha was almost visible. Dark eyes softened and the jounin moved without a sound to where the boys lay. Gently, he picked up Sasuke and placed him propped up against the wall and brushed his long bangs off his grubby face.

It'll be trouble if someone wakes up before him and finds him in such a un-Sasukeish position, Kakashi mused, picturing the embarrassed anger on his young face. He almost laughed.

Suddenly the rain was gone and it was silent. The man lifted himself to his full height. He nudged Sasuke and Sakura awake, pressing a finger to his masked lips to make sure they stayed quiet. Something moved outside. With two fingers Kakashi motioned for them and each ninja moved stealthily to the entrance of the barn, kunai at the ready.

Someone was humming loudly. They know we're here, thought Kakashi. It's us they've come for. He leapt into the clearing, Sasuke and Sakura following. No attacks came. They moved into a defensive position, standing back to back, crouched low. Three figures sat high in the trees. Kakashi heard Sasuke growl. New faces. Not the same ninja from before but the outfits were similar to the first round of enemies and two wielded katana. The second string? Why? Wondered Kakashi briefly.

"What do you want," asked the eldest sharingan user, keeping his voice even.

"Strong..." hissed the single woman, appearing in front of him suddenly. There was a moment where everyone was quiet as she flicked out her tongue, tasting their chakra, Kakashi realized. They leapt back, and then, the silence exploded as the other two men leapt from the trees, roaring in attack.

...

It wasn't that Kakashi was losing; it was just that he wasn't winning. He stepped back as the woman leaned into him, her slitted grey eyes locking with his mismatched ones. With a kunai in hand he swept his arm out but missed. Her technique was unusual. When he was playing defense, she would rush at him, pushing him further and further into the trees but she never formed any hand signs or drew a weapon. When he switched to offense she could dodge easily in fluid movements, bending over and then flipping backwards, her pointed toes sweeping close to his chin. She rarely attacked. He didn't like it. It was the same as last time, Kakashi was being separated but this time he was on his own and this time he had realized too late what she was doing. He cursed under his breath.

...

Sakura stood back to back with Sasuke. She felt him move closer, pressing his shoulder blades to her so he could feel if she moved. She pushed back to gauge his breathing. His breath was ragged and noisy, his body shuddering as the air passed through his lungs. Sasuke was exhausted. The pink haired kunoichi widened her stance, ready to protect her team mate if she had too. He was tired, she slightly less. He had protected her from the most of the fight, taking on the quicker opponent and occasionally jumping in to nudge her out of the way of a surprise attack as she tackled the bigger but slower enemy.

Very carefully, Sakura flicked her eyes towards the barn. Naruto. Was he awake? In the moment when she had lifted her gaze from her opponent the faster one had rushed in and ripped her from Sasuke's side, throwing her to the ground and shoving the blade of his thin bladed sword to her throat. She heard Sasuke yell and saw him struggling as he was restrained, the big ninja's arms wrapped tightly around him. From the corner of her eye she saw Kakashi escape his opponent and begin to rush from the trees.

"Sakura!"

"Sakura!"

She began to panic as the enemy female ninja leapt in front of Kakashi. Who would save her? Could she do this by herself? Her panting shortened and quickened as blood roared in her ears, the flat side of the sword cutting of her airway. She looked up at the body on top of her. His face was blotched with inky black spots from lack of air. Sakura blinked slowly. He was young, maybe a few years older than her. His face was handsome; his eyes a piercing green, much greener than her own. But his smile was wide and slightly too big for his face as his lips curled into a crazed grin.

"You're pretty," he murmured to her and she lay very still.

"Sakura! Sakura!" Sasuke saw his hand first as it slipped down her body until it was between her legs. His fingertips were cold as her ran them the length of her feeling her through her clothes. Sakura cried out. It was a desperate and terrified cry and it echoed throughout the clearing until it was overtaken by something louder.

BOOM! The structure exploded and orange chakra burst forward, flaring high through the smoke and over the treetops. Every pair of eyes turned, watched, widened. Every body tensed as the immense power of the chakra attacked their senses. The smoke cleared and Sakura's lips trembled as she whispered his name.

"Naruto..."


	3. Chapter 3

_I'm really sorry it's short. I seem to work in short chapters for some reason... Hmm... What a troublesome habit so sorry about that.._

_Anyway I just read the latest manga chap and theres the whole *spoilers-ish btw* "Naruto really loves you, Sakura" thing and I almost died because i was sitting there going "No! Love. Sasuke! Grr" (As I do), -SO- i decided I better put a SasuNaru moment in this thing soon and started writing the next chapter so look forward to it ok? =] _

_Thanks to readers and reviewers! Enjoy!_

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One, two, three, four... Sasuke counted them from a distance as they stained the sky orange. Four tails. Sasuke gulped as he watched Naruto crouched in the ruins of the barn, snarling, his eyes burning bright red. Kyuubi. Sakura was whimpering quietly. The young black haired ninja quickly switched his focus to Sakura and her captor.

"I'll take care of her and then kill that thing," muttered the green eyed ninja holding their female team mate captive confidently, unfazed by Naruto's clear transformation, even as his team mates stared in disbelief, fear evident in their eyes.

Idiot.

Sakura's opponent raised his arm in a swift, smooth movement and held the sword above the girl's chest, point down. The sudden action triggered the beast on the other side of the clearing. In a movement too fast for even Sasuke's sharingan to track, he flew.

...

His clawed hands closed around their necks, pinning them both to the ground. He knelt over them, one knee on each chest. One gasped something; the other stared up at him. He could smell the fear on them and he loved it. He grinned and ran his tongue over his lips. In the back of his mind he knew he was only supposed to kill one, that it was bad to kill both. His eyes skittered edgily over their faces, trying to determine the difference between their weak bodies. He bent and licked both of their faces. They shuddered. Who was the one to kill? He couldn't tell.

Nothing was familiar to him. Not the faces, not the voices, not the scents, not the taste of their skin. He growled, frustrated. One was talking to him in a tone that he hated. It was soft and meant to sound smooth but he knew, he knew it was fake. He could feel her body tremble and the underlying note in the voice sounded terrified. He curled his lips back revealing sharpened canines, snarling. The other was watching him carefully with widened eyes. They were vividly green and the hovering beast narrowed his eyes, considering. Could this be the one to leave unharmed? The face smiled at him.

That did it.

He released their necks but neither had time to move, each stunned by his unimaginable speed. A high pitched scream rang out and then was cut off as his claws plunged through the flesh of the pathetic human's chest. Kyuubi grinned as blood splattered onto his face and stained the whole of his lower arm. This one's blood was so deliciously warm.

...

Kakashi's eyes saw only him and her; Naruto and Sakura, as he plunged the kunai deep into the woman's chest, pushing her aside. He didn't notice the blood; he didn't hear her cry out. Every sound was gone apart from the beating of his own heart. The only thing he saw was Sakura, her mouth opening into the beginnings of a scream. He ran as fast as his legs would take him. The only thing he saw was Naruto, his eyes wild and crazed.

So close! Just that little bit further!

The silvered haired ninja reached out his hand as they were released from the demon's grip. His desperate fingers closed around Sakura's arm and he pulled as hard as he could, yanking her away as Naruto's clawed hand went for the man. It didn't matter if it hurt her as he ripped her away. He couldn't afford to be gentle. Kakashi's other hand came around her mouth. Naruto sunk his hand deep into the enemy ninja's chest as Kakashi retreated in a leap, dragging Sakura with him.

At a distance the copy cat ninja watched, kneeling with the girl slumped against his side. No one moved. Naruto dislodged his hand and brought it to his mouth. He distractedly swiped his tongue along one finger as his eyes came to rest on Sasuke who was still in the clutches of the last remaining ninja. Blood so red it was black dripped from his arm onto the grass. His golden hair caught the light through the tree tops. A growl rumbled in the deathly silence. Kakashi heard Sakura suck in air, his heartbeat quickened. She let it back out in the form of a choked sob. Naruto's head snapped around at the sound and Kakashi thrust his hand in Sakura's mouth, throwing her back slightly on impact.

"Bite," he whispered, his voice panic stricken, his widened eyes never leaving the Kyuubi boy. The tension in the air was so thick it was hard to breathe. It hung on the trees and dripped from the branches. They waited. Neither man nor girl moved. Sakura's fingers were painfully tight around his wrists as she held his hand to her mouth. Her teeth driving into his flesh through his thick gloves was nearly unbearable. Naruto watched them a moment longer before shifting his gaze.

...

The only alive enemy seemed to be paralyzed with fear, his arms still trapping Sasuke. The young Uchiha himself was watching Naruto. His jaw tightened as Naruto flicked his tails, his image wavering like a mirage inside Kyuubi's cloak. He opened his mouth but there was no time for words or screams as the other boy rushed at them and leapt off all fours. Sasuke's breath caught in his chest as Naruto's mouth passed by his cheek, the fierce chakra surrounding him incased Sasuke for a moment and he couldn't breathe at all. The beast sunk his teeth into the neck behind his ear. The arms that held him loosened and he leapt away, retreating as Naruto snarled and tossed his head violently, ripping away the flesh. The huge body fell backwards and Sasuke stood staring.

...

"Nobody move..." murmured Kakashi firmly. Sasuke followed his order and Sakura bit down harder, trying to quiet herself. His thoughts were racing too fast for the jounin to come up with a plan. None of them had even seen Naruto in his Kyuubi form to this extent. His sharingan eye flew around the clearing, searching for escape routes that he already knew were no use. There was no counter to Naruto's speed and strength. He was now pure monster. Every move he made was animalistic.

Kakashi felt his gorge rise as the blonde raised his head from the dead ninja and turned to them, blood dripping from his chin. The sharingan zeroed in on his injury from the previous day. His shredded black shirt fluttered in the breeze revealing the reopened wound. Naruto lifted his face and caught their scents. Thick blood oozed from the hole in his gut as he lifted himself up onto just his feet, his arms hanging loosely, his head bowed. He took three slow steps towards them, unsteady on just two limbs.

"Naruto..." whispered Sasuke next to him. Kakashi shushed him in a low voice but when he turned to check the boy he looked like he hadn't heard him. Hot panic bubbled in the back of the jounin's throat.

"Naruto..." came the rough voice from beneath the long black hair. His chin rested on his chest, his shoulders shaking. Kyuubi roared and Kakashi heard the swish of grass. Realization smacked him in the face as the Sasuke shifted his weight.

"Sasuke! No!" It was too late. Sasuke's head snapped up. Throwing back his shoulders he sprinted forward, his face angry, the sharingan blazing.

"NARUTO!" Sasuke's cry was hoarse and loud.

Kakashi reached for him, his fingertips brushing the boy's back leg but he was gone.

"SASUKE! NO!"


	4. Chapter 4

_Go to youtube. Type- SasuNaru: Inseperable. Watch. Its my fav amv atm. Superly intense_. _I like it alot. I cried a little at the end... T^T_

_Anyway, here is Chapter 4. SasuNaru ish - (medium sized 'ish') An anti SasuNaru person :cough-crazy-cough: could argue that it's friendship but SasuNaru *love-love* is just where my shonen-ai oriented mind goes._

_Thanks for reading. Reviews would be lovely ^-^_

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Every time his feet pounded against the ground it shook him to the core. What was he doing? He would die for sure, but even so, he had to try. Sasuke set his jaw, his eyes narrowed to slits as the wind rushed at him. The image of Kyuubi closing in was slightly blurred as he moved faster than Sasuke could keep up with. They met and Kyuubi came to a sudden stop while Sasuke's feet kept moving, too fast to stop him. Too fast for him to react in time. The fox boy delivered a hard blow to his side. He struck him with force Sasuke had never felt and as the palm connected, the Uchiha felt the chakra surrounding it pass straight through him, stealing the air from his chest and sending him flying.

There was no time. He hit the ground, knocking himself senseless, falling from the sky so fast that he couldn't turn to land on his feet. Before his wits could return to him Kyuubi was on him. Sasuke breathed in sharply as their eyes met and locked. Time stopped.

Naruto's eyes were half lidded, blood red. Beautiful and deadly; watching the face beneath him calmly. The eyes of the Kyuubi demon. But something in the way this monster held his mouth, the way his eyebrows came together into and anguished frown was so indisputably Naruto that every ounce of power left Sasuke's body and he laid helplessly beneath him. Dark eyes broke away first, becoming very aware of the blood on the other boy's face, the smell of metal on his breath. His stomach churned but he didn't look away for long. He was drawn back to the face that was Naruto's but not as Kyuubi knelt over him, not tearing him apart, not hurting him, not killing him. Just... existing. Kakashi, Sakura, the sky, the ground, the entire clearing was gone. Both of them, just existing in the silence. Naruto's eyebrows twitched and blue cut through red for a split second, so quickly that Sasuke thought he had imagined it. The demon sighed painfully, almost inaudibly.

"Dobe?" whispered Sasuke, lifting his hands weakly, his fingers searching until they came to rest on the face that was Naruto's but not.

For a moment he thought that he had found him, Naruto, inside the orange cloak but as soon as his fingertips ghosted across his cheeks to touch the ragged whiskered scars, the red eyes widened and Kyuubi howled, ripping his face away like Sasuke's touch had burnt him.

"Stop it!" screamed the raven, clamping his hands on either side of Naruto's face as he tossed his head and tried to scramble back. Sasuke's legs automatically tangled themselves around Naruto's and he dug his fingers in harder. The demon struggled frantically and Sasuke's thumbs pressed in harder. Suddenly, Kyuubi froze and his head snapped back, eyes feral, red with rage, deep furrows in his brow, lips curled back revealing his elongated canines. Sasuke stared up, setting a scowl on his face that he desperately hoped looked more steady than it felt.

"Stop it," he commanded. The beast growled at his voice and then launched forward. He went for Sasuke's neck, teeth bared, snarling like the monster he was.

...

Drip, drip in the shadows. Alone, shackled by the dark.

"_Naruto_." Somewhere within, blue eyes opened in surprise. His name. He had heard it just now, right? Not "baka", not "dobe", not "usuratonkachi". His name. The dark's suffocating hold lessened a little. His name without the sarcasm dripping from it, without the note of annoyance weaved between the syllables. No anger, no irritation, no resentment. Naruto reached out into the dark, trying to feel for anything.

"Teme? Is that you?" His fingers touched the fur of the Kyuubi and he recoiled, repulsed at how his skin crawled even though the pelt was soft. Two steps back, one tiny step forward. His eyes stung as he brought his hands to his face, fighting away frightened tears he had refused for so long. Closed with the tails the boy was lost. It was dark, cold and he could hear water dripping somewhere. The smell of blood made his head spin; he could taste it under his tongue. He dropped to his knees.

"Teme... Are you there at all?" He curled his shoulders in, cringing away from his own voice. His voice that was pathetic, weak, scared. "Help me..."

"_Naruto?" _There it was again! A question this time. He vaguely felt a breeze, smelt grass close to his face.

"Teme! Where are you!" He stood and pushed against the fur. Adrenaline pulsed and ran hot and fast. The grass was from beyond the tails wasn't it? Was he there too?

"Teme! Help! Where are you! Teme!" He frantically searched for an exit, trying to hold onto the sound of his name being called as the darkness pulled it away from him.

"Teme! Teme!" A light? A light!

"SASUKE!" The darkness exploded in white daylight.

...

The body fell away and landed heavily on its side next to him. Sasuke stared up into the sky.

"Sasuke! Naruto!" Kakashi was calling them as he and Sakura ran to their sides. Their footsteps made the ground shake when they got close. Sasuke closed his eyes and lay still. Sakura dropped to her knees beside him. Her trembling fingertips felt carefully along his sides, searching for broken bones, tracing the ridges of his ribs as his chest heaved. He couldn't get enough air.

"Sasuke kun? Are you alright?" She sounded dull, her fingers still at his side. He blinked, rewatching Naruto's head lurch forward and then stop as Sasuke opened his mouth and muttered something he couldn't remember. The blonde head had withdrawn slowly and looked down at him like he was only just realizing where he was. There had been a long moment where Naruto simply stared through him; his eyebrows arched high under his thick blonde hair. Sasuke had called him, unsurely and then watched, amazed as the blue fire burst into his eyes and the red washed away. The whiskers thinned to light lines and the claws on the hands on either side of Sasuke's head receded.

"Sasuke kun?" The girl's voice sounded panicked now.

Answer. Answer her.

Sasuke blinked three times fast and then shifted his eyes. Sakura was sitting next to him, battered and bruised, her face unnaturally white.

"Sakura." Kakashi's voice was loud and the raven jumped. Sakura got up and rushed to Naruto's side as he began to throw up, barely conscious. She stood over him, one arm wrapped around him, her palm against his chest, holding him up, the other pushing his hair of his face.

Kakashi came to Sasuke's side and crouched next to him.

"Alright Sasuke?" He smiled. "You gave us quite a scare, since when are you so reckless?" His voice jumped in the wrong places. It really had given him a scare. Sasuke sat up, wincing and holding his sore side. They both looked over to Naruto. Kakashi's eye darkened and returned to Sasuke who didn't meet his gaze. "What happened out there, Sasuke?" he murmured. Sasuke just shook his head and crawled over to help Sakura who had tears running down her face as she laid Naruto on the ground.

Once they had Naruto settled on the grass Sakura touched his face and he opened his eyes a little, looking up at them.

"Naruto?"

"Sakura chan... Sasuke..." Naruto smiled a little but his lips trembled and he couldn't hold it for too long. "I'm sorry. I don't remember but... I'm so sorry..." His eyes skittered over them, drinking in their injuries. He squeezed them shut and sobbed brokenly. Sasuke watched him without a word. His eyelashes felt thick and his eyes prickled with something unfamiliar and forgotten.

_Naruto... _


	5. Chapter 5

_Gomen, Gomen. Took a little longer than usual. Somehow times slips away faster when you have something you need to do. *Sigh*_

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Awkward silence. He was scared to breathe too loudly. This was not safe, comfortable, Team 7 silence, it was awkward silence. Kakashi panned left to right. To his left was Sasuke, walking one step in front, his head up. His eyes were forward but they kept slipping sideways, almost coming to rest on the boy in Kakashi's arms but he'd always catch himself. Cradled against his chest was Naruto, his eyes closed, body too tense to be sleeping. The corners of the masked mouth turned down as he assessed Naruto's wound. It was now closed but the skin around it raised, angry-red and scabbing. Was something wrong? Earlier he hadn't noticed, but shouldn't the wound be healed by now? Or healed when Naruto was under Kyuubi's control? At the very least it should be healing quicker than it was. He frowned. He didn't like leaving the matter unanswered but they had a mission to complete. With or without Kousuke they had to report to the Mizukage.

Moments passed. One remained to be checked on, realized the Leaf's Copy Cat. Sakura. She walked one step behind, head down. He could almost hear her thoughts. Useless. Completely useless. Something like that. Her fingers twitched, curling and then her face would pull together, concentrating hard until her hands relaxed again. Trying not to clench her fists? Kakashi shook his head, a habit he seemed to have picked up soon after taking on the young ninja.

Step, step, stop. The others stopped too and turned to look at him. Sasuke's eyes came to meet his straight away, completely avoiding Naruto. Sakura lifted her face slowly. She lingered on Naruto and then came all the way up but her sea foam green eyes didn't lock with his. They settled nervously somewhere on the bridge of his nose. Kakashi sighed and held Naruto out to Sasuke. The Uchiha boy narrowed his eyes and scowled a little as he took Naruto in his arms.

"Where's my forehead protector," asked Naruto his eyes still closed.

"In my bag, dobe." replied Sasuke quietly, the scowl fell from his face.

"We took it off when you got hurt," said Sakura. There was a minute where they all just watched Naruto. The awkwardness had gone as soon as Naruto had spoken. They were in Team 7 silence; the silence where they were all speaking at once without words.

_I let you down..._

_I was too slow..._

_I'm useless..._

_Don't hate me..._

_I'm sorry..._

It was sad and it hurt the three young shinobi, he could tell, but it was safe.

Kakashi looked back to Sakura. Useless. Completely useless, he heard.

"Sakura, let's take a short walk shall we?" he invited quietly. Sakura turned, surprised, her eyes finally meeting his. An unpleasant sensation ran the length of his spine. "Come on." She paused and then nodded obediently, following him off the track, leaving Sasuke alone holding Naruto.

…

The young kunoichi's tried to quiet her nervous breathing as she trailed after her mentor. What did he want? It was about what happened in the battle, right? He was finally going to tell her straight up that she needed to stop relying on the boys. A twig cracked under Kakashi's foot and she jumped. He turned.

"Sakura." She stepped back.

"Yes, Kakashi sensei?"

Don't say it, she begged. I know, just please don't say it. She was a coward; her eyes fell away from him.

"Look at me." She clenched and unclenched her fists.

"Look at me," he said firmly. Sakura's eyes didn't move. She could smell the bitter scent of tears in her nostrils as she slowly traced the sunlight's dappled patterns on the wet grass. The jounin sighed and placed a hand on her shoulder. It was heavy and warm. Something stuck in her throat that she couldn't swallow.

Don't say it.

I know.

Don't say it.

"What's wrong Sakura?" She blinked. One tear fell and curved along her face, coming to rest in the corner of her parted mouth. He squeezed her shoulder, cocking his head slightly. His voice had curved up at the end. A question? Blink. Shouldn't it be even and hard? A lecture? She looked up at him through her eyelashes. People like her weren't allowed to lift their chins like they had something to be proud of.

"You can tell me you know." He said, cutting through her thoughts, his eyebrow dipping into a confused frown. "Is it that you feel responsible for what happened back there? You feel... _Useless_?" The word struck Sakura in the chest; she sucked in air and stumbled a little, pulling herself from Kakashi's grasp. One tear chased another. The word echoed in her head longer than it should have.

Kakashi sighed and shook his head, just like he always did. Her eyes dropped again. Aggravated, frustrated, annoyed, irritated, fractious... She wished for once her vocabulary wasn't quite as wide as it was. Which word described how he felt right now? Sakura didn't know. She didn't dare look into his face. They stood for a while, Sakura staring at her feet, biting her lip, Kakashi turned with his back half to her.

She closed her eyes. Scenes from the battles flooded her vision. Every colour was heightened, excruciatingly bright. Naruto's orange jacket stung the worst; a flurry that sent her head spinning as he jumped in close to her, shoving her away from Kousuke. The scene turned black and white and slowed. All she saw was the unbearable blue of his eyes before a new memory surfaced and she was ripped away and flung underneath the green-eyed ninja. She didn't stay there long. Just long enough to be tortured by the moment. Suddenly Naruto's hand was around her neck. The words she remembered saying sounded pathetic and fake as she tried to coax his consciousness back. Two seconds there and onto the next scene. Sasuke was sprinting away and she was sitting, too scared to move. _Useless_.

Her eyes opened and looked toward Kakashi, glancing stealthily out of her peripheral vision. His figure was distorted through her long pink bangs.

"We need you, Sakura," he said softly and she tensed, snapping her eyes away. This comfort he was trying to give hurt more than a lecture.

"You don't," she murmured softly. "I'm... not of any value." She couldn't even say it. That word that was her. He sighed. Again.

"I always act like I know so much more," she said and then laughed miserably. "So what if I'm more mature than Naruto? So what if I can work out a logical problem faster than Sasuke kun? In the end that kind of thing doesn't count for anything, because they're always jumping in, putting their lives on the line where I'm too scared and they're always in the lead and I just watch. I'm helpless... I'm always, _always _walking in the back. Useless!" Her voice jumped a notch and cracked as she covered her face with her hands. She could feel the man's eye on her. She wanted him to look away, but of course he didn't.

"Sakura." His hand dropped onto her head, startling the sob from her chest. She whimpered pathetically. "You know why you're always in the back?" She trembled and he ruffled her hair a bit. "I don't think you do. You walk in the back for a good reason. You walk in the back because for Naruto and Sasuke, two people who no matter how much they think they're not, are still very much children, sometimes find it a bit scary looking forward, to future. Strong ties with past you know?" She lifted her face to find his eye on her, soft and smoldering.

"Having you behind them is something I think both of them actually need. Being able to look back when it's too scary, and know there is someone watching them, supporting them and pushing them forward is something they really _need_." His gaze hardened, boring the message into her, she couldn't look away.

"They love you Sakura. Sasuke's a bit shy and Naruto of course says it all the time without thinking but not even they don't realize how much _they_ depend on _you._" She watched him with wide eyes. It wasn't a lie was it? Could there be a truth to his words? His one eye crinkled into a familiar, masked smile.

"No ninja can become truly strong if they have don't have someone precious to protect, if they don't have someone to love them." Sakura's fingers uncurled and she shuddered into a sob. He lifted his hand away and stepped back.

The something she couldn't swallow was gone and her whole body was light. Tears were of relief rolled over her cheeks. She was needed. She wasn't useless after all. Of course she would still work hard to get stronger because relying on Sasuke and Naruto wasn't something she felt good about, but the weight she had felt on her heart was gone. Sakura smiled a little, a smile she knew would look bad with her tear stained face and quivering lips, but that wasn't important right now. Maybe, just maybe, walking in the back wasn't so bad.

"Thank you... Kakashi sensei..."

They returned to the forest side trail. Sasuke was sitting cross-legged in the middle of the path with his face turned away, a childish pout of annoyance on his handsome face. Naruto lay with his head in Sasuke's lap, eyes closed and breathing deeply. Sleeping. Sakura smiled as she watched Kakashi pick up Naruto and Sasuke jump up and start walking again, waiting for no one. She fell into step with the raven haired boy, matching his quick footsteps and waited for him to acknowledge her. His eyes drifted sideways and met hers before moving frontwards again. That was an 'I know your there' in Sasuke language. It may even have been a 'Hi' but his eyebrows were a little too furrowed and his lips too tight. He was still on edge.

"Ne, Sasuke kun?" He didn't look.

"What is it?" he responded smoothly without much emotion. Definitely on edge. She paused.

"Do you love me?" The boy tripped, missing a quick footstep, his cheeks flushing a soft pink. She giggled lightly. If she remembered correctly, that kind of direct question had never come up before. Usually she just told him that she loved him and he would accept it without saying a word. "No", "Go away" and "Thanks, but no thanks" had disappeared from their conversations sometime ago. This was new.

"Well?"

He was silent for a while and then he turned his face completely away from her.

"A-as a... friend, I guess..." he muttered. Konoha's Cherry Blossom smiled and slowed her steps, falling back to watch his back, the colours of the Uchiha crest crisp against the blue in the after-rain sun.

If its scary Sasuke kun, don't forget, I'm here.


	6. Chapter 6

_Sorry it took longer than normal, I had exams... ew :/_

_Anyway, here it is, Chapter 6 ^-^_

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The cold from the grey marble floor reached him through his pants. Vaguely uncomfortable. His eyes wandered across the white washed pattern beneath him. Like waves on sand at the beach, Naruto thought numbly and let his focus slip making his vision blurry. What had happened? He fingered a thread of his torn shirt. They were fighting and he had jumped in front of Kousuke, he remembered. And then blackness, for a long time. He frowned. The only things he could piece together from there was somewhere very dark and then someone's voice and the smell of grass. After that there was... vomiting? The blonde boy ran his tongue around his mouth and grimaced. Definitely vomiting. After that he had drifted in and out of consciousness, only remembering wanting his forehead protector and the even footsteps of whoever was carrying him until Team 7 arrived at the Mizukage's Tower. There were more memories further down but he couldn't quite reach them. Every time his fingers brushed their surface they would show him something so quickly that it was gone before he could figure out what it was and then retreat further into the darkness. How frustrating.

He lifted his blue eyes and found Sakura. She was standing next to him, her eyes closed. Naruto's heart clenched as he looked her over, spotting the deep blue bruises at her neck. Why was that? Did I have something to do with it? He flicked to Sasuke. He was watching him from where he stood across from him. Naruto's mouth pulled into a pout as he narrowed his eyes at his dark haired team mate.

"What?"

"Nothing."

Silence. They held each others gaze. Naruto felt Sakura shift uncomfortably.

"Do you really not remember?" she asked. He looked up. Pain flared in the lower part of his stomach, the muscle tensing as he turned to her. He grit his teeth and was quiet for a moment before answering.

"Not much," he replied. Sakura's pastel green eyes jumped between Sasuke himself, skittering nervously like she had something to hide. Something to do with the injuries that she and Sasuke had maybe? He shifted his gaze to Sasuke. Sakura obviously wasn't going to tell him.

"Did I do something bad?" he asked, staring directly at Sasuke, his normally childish blue eyes darkened with confusion; but not too much. Sasuke wasn't allowed to see all his feelings. He wasn't allowed to see how not knowing was affecting him. The other boy sighed wearily.

"Yes, you Dobe, you nearly-"

"Sasuke kun!" They both jumped at the authority in the voice that rang through the cold waiting room outside the Mizukage's office. The blonde blinked and pulled his shoulders closer to his ears. Sakura was scary when she was mad. The raven frowned.

"Sakura. You don't have to protect to him," said Sasuke, turning his body towards the girl. She faltered under his undivided attention, the corners of her mouth turning down, her authority collapsing completely. She always was weak against him. Naruto watched them before screwing up his face up and closing his eyes into a scowl.

"Tell me...!" he whined, knowing it annoyed both to no ends. Maybe they would lose it and just blurt it out. Before either Sasuke or Sakura could yell at him a hand dropped onto his head. His stomach burst into a strong ache as his body caved slightly under the weight.

"There is no need to discuss it. Besides, you already apologized." Naruto tilted his head up, his large blue eyes round and curious again. Kakashi smiled down into the boy's bent-over-backwards face from where he crouched behind him.

"Did I?" He couldn't remember.

"Yeah, you were pretty out of it so you may not remember," replied the Jounin as he turned his attention to the other two members of their team. Sasuke was still glaring at Sakura. She was backed against the wall again, avoiding his harsh, black eyes while he openly stared at her.

"Sasuke, play nice. Naruto doesn't belong to you so you don't get to decide when and when not to scold him," called Kakashi. Sasuke's face twitched and he snapped his eyes away.

"That's not what I meant," he said under his breath. Naruto swore he was blushing but maybe he was just riled up. Kakashi smiled, Sakura sighed and Naruto laughed. The questions, blank spaces in his memories and the aching in his seemingly healed wound disappeared from his mind for the moment.

"Who would want that Usuratonkachi..." muttered the Uchiha.

"Hey!" yelled the blonde.

…

Back out in the rain, Sakura spoke up.

"So what did the Mizukage say Kakashi sensei?" Three pairs of eyes turned to the man. His own eye closed. Naruto blinked the rain off his eyelashes as Kakashi sighed.

"He was very understanding. But he said he'd like us out of here by tomorrow so we need to find somewhere to stay," he replied. "We'll split up and look for someone who will take us in since I don't have much money with me. Naruto you come with me, maybe we can trick someone by using your injury. Sakura and Sasuke go together. You two all sodden and shivering will probably convince someone."

"That's sneaky Kakashi sensei," complained Sakura half heartedly. Kakashi just chuckled quietly. Naruto got it. Everyone was tired. Everyone wanted to sleep.

"Let's go Naruto," called his sensei.

Sasuke walked behind Sakura as she led the way down a street that had a couple of inns on it. The first four stops had been fails, each and every one of them claiming they were full up. He was willing to bet that no one wanted to take in a team of ninja covered in dirt and deep-set blood stains. Sakura had babbled for the first part of the walk but now she was silent, just as exhausted as he was. Her back was covered in grass stains, her front darkened with blood. The long tags of red material that fell between her legs were tattered and torn. He wondered if he looked as pathetic as she did right now.

Finally they found someone to take them in. She was old and weathered but kind and agreed to house all four ninja for the night. She smiled down at them and took Sakura inside while Sasuke went to find Naruto and Kakashi.

...

"Bath. You two. Right now," Kakashi commanded pointing at Naruto and Sasuke.

"Together?" the blonde haired boy's voice was hoarse and tired but just as loud as ever.

"Yes. Now." Kakashi shoved them a little and Naruto stumbled. Sasuke glowered.

"No buts, there isn't enough clean water left to take them separately. Go."

"Kakashi sensei...!"

"Shitty Jounin..."

...

Naruto looked down to check the small towel that both had decided to leave around their waists, hadn't drifted up in the weightlessness of the warm water. Three drops dripped from his blonde hair as he turned his head, surveying the bathroom again. They were seated in an unusually long bathtub that was obviously made for two people. Naruto felt awkward just sitting in it. It was so big that he could sit with his legs almost completely stretched out, his toes nearly touching Sasuke's feet.

Sasuke's feet... Curious, he straightened out his foot and brought it to the one opposite, not touching it but close enough to see. His lips parted a little in surprise. Sasuke's feet were bigger; the tips of Naruto's toes only came to where Sasuke's started. He looked up. The Uchiha boy was staring into space with his face lifted to the ceiling. Was he so tired he didn't even notice or was he just bored and couldn't be bothered saying anything? Naruto wanted to splash him just to see his expression but he decided against it.

Sasuke looked different without clothes on. Blue eyes swept the length of the sitting form. He was slender like a woman, his body much longer than it appeared when he was wearing a shirt. He had long legs too. Torso and arms showed little signs of the strength the boy possessed, his chest and stomach running into each other. One white, untouched slate. Naruto was sure that on his stomach there were faint lines of his hardened abdomen muscles but Sasuke looked soft and powdery, like flower petals, his almost translucent skin smooth; tiny water droplets sliding over it with ease. Moving his foot away, Naruto sat up straighter. In comparison to himself, Sasuke's shoulders were a little wider. I guess because he's taller he should be bigger, reasoned Naruto to himself. Sasuke's body was so strange. It was long and pale but he had wider shoulders and bigger feet than Naruto. He looked soft, the slight curve of his waist and that of his shoulders flawless. It didn't make much sense at all.

There was also his face. That face that if the jaw line wasn't quite as sharp, could have belonged to a female. Hot, hot, hot, was all Sakura said about Sasuke regarding physical appearance but he was really more like beautiful. Naruto mentally kicked himself for thinking it but it was true. He had never met a person with a face quite like Sasuke's. All dark, mysterious eyes and delicate arching eyebrows. So much like a girl but the way he held his mouth and his chin was so distinctly male.

The water rippled unexpectedly, pulling Naruto from his observations.

"We can't stay here all night, hurry up and wash then we can get out," said Sasuke, his voice cutting through the thick bathroom air. Naruto blinked and reached for a wash cloth.

"A-ah, yeah." Had Sasuke seen him staring at him? He wasn't sure. Naruto raised his arms, bringing the cloth to his face. Halfway there, a sharp pain cut across his middle. The seal felt like it was on fire!

Naruto froze, his arms stopped in midair, sucking in air as he struggled not to double over in pain. White spots appeared before his eyes and then disappeared as quickly as they came as the cloth slipped through his fingers. He couldn't speak; the flames were burning in his throat. What was going on? His first instinct was to hide it. Years of being alone and cautious had developed a habit of carefully masking fear and pain. His arms dropped in slow jerks. Sasuke watching him, he could feel it. Act normal. Act normal.

Finally the pain settled and Naruto concentrated on quieting his breaths, breaths that felt like they were made of flames and tasted like salty-sweet blood. Under the water, he fingered the seal gently, avoiding Sasuke's eyes.

"I'm... fine, I'm clean enough, I don't need to" Naruto choked out, panic strangling the words. So it wasn't healed? Even though that scabbing and redness he had noticed before was gone? The skin was smooth beneath his fingertips. Laughing nervously, turned his face away.

"I don't need to..." he murmured.

Not a word left Sasuke's perfect mouth as he moved. In one slow, swift movement Sasuke had slunk closer, retrieving the wash cloth as he went. Naruto didn't see him, he barely even heard him but suddenly one of Sasuke's hands was on his shoulder and the other, hidden in the folds of damp material, came to his face.

"What are you doing?" yelled Naruto, backing away. The fingers on his shoulder tightened, steadying him. Soft cloth began to move gently across his cheeks and then under his eyes.

"W-w-w-w..." Naruto stammered as the other boy settled himself more comfortably between his legs. Heat flooded his whiskered cheeks.

"You can't do it by yourself, right? You're such a child," replied Sasuke, moving his hand to the back of Naruto's neck, his fingertips pressing against the base of his head as he dabbed his forehead clean around a small graze.

"W-w-w..." Naruto stumbled again. Actual words didn't want to form.

"Shh," shushed Sasuke.

Naruto's mouth closed slowly and he proceeded to sit silently, his eyes widened in either shock or anger. He was too flustered to think properly. Sasuke's breath flooded over his skin as he leaned in to assess a cut on Naruto's lip. After a moment he smirked and dragged the cloth roughly over the open wound. The water stung and Naruto flinched. Sasuke laughed lightly and Naruto felt himself pout in habitual response.

"Teme..."

"Dobe," Sasuke replied evenly as he cleaned away a light blood stain on one side of Naruto's face.

When he was done, the pale hands, that Naruto had concluded were also probably bigger than his own, let the wash cloth fall into the water.

"You can do the rest yourself," Sasuke said as he got out, water sloshing around his legs as he stepped out and left the room, wrapping his strange body in a big towel. Naruto watched him go, the heat finally leaving his cheeks.

Which kind of thoughts should he be having after what had just happened?

Angry? _What the hell was that? Why did he do that?_

Or grateful?_ You knew it hurt? Did you see from the start, Sasuke?_


	7. Chapter 7

_Exams are over and done with so I finally had time to write the new Chapter. I hope this satisfies those of you who have been waiting for a little less Sakura and a little more SasuNaru stuff. ^-^_

_Enjoy!_

_

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Sasuke walked down the hallway towards his room, allowing his mask to fall away and his face to become slightly troubled now that he was alone. Something was definitely wrong with the seal. Naruto's face... It had been hard to react calmly to that. Should I tell Kakashi? He wondered as he slid the paper door to the room that he and Naruto were sharing open. It would be trouble if Naruto got out of hand again, and the stupid Dobe probably wouldn't go to anyone himself; that's why he tried to hide it.

Pulling on a shirt and shaking the rest of the water from his damp hair, the young ninja replayed the scene in his head again, concentrating on the emotion that crossed the blonde's blue eyes in the moment when he had frozen with his arms halfway up. It was impossible to separate them all; there were too many. The ones that Sasuke could pick out were only the early ones, ones he had seen firsthand in the eyes before. Shock, they widened, the blue stood out vividly. Pain, they narrowed as the corners of Naruto's mouth pulled out wide into a grimace. He saw shock often, pain slightly less frequently but they were about all he could identify. The others were unfamiliar, could one be fear? The raven boy blinked and concentrated, trying to find a memory he had when Naruto was scared. He came up empty handed.

Now fully dressed, Sasuke pulled the door open again and padded quietly down the hallway on his bath-soft bare feet to their sensei's room. He'd have to tell him.

...

"Kakashi," he called from outside the door.

"Come in," the man inside called back. Sasuke entered without a word and looked down at the jounin who was sitting on the floor in front of a low table, dressed only in the dark skins of his ninja attire, his silver hair falling to cover the scarred sharingan eye in the absence of his forehead protector.

"Sit down," he offered in politely. The young Uchiha moved to do so, his face hard and cold. Kakashi leaned forward on his elbows, closing his eye into a smile.

"What's with that serious face Sasuke kun? Could it be something happened between you and Naruto in the bath tub?" asked Kakashi playfully, adding the suffix to the boys name just to annoy him. Sasuke didn't take the bait; instead he sat calmly and took a breath.

"Yes, something happened," he replied and Kakashi's eye opened.

"Hmmm? I'm surprised you came out with it so easily."

"I think your misunderstanding," huffed Sasuke, reddening in anger. "What I mean is I think something is wrong with Naruto's seal," he explained. The older man's one eye darkened as the subject became serious. Sasuke drew air through his nose. The room smelt of rain.

"I see," said Kakashi, pulling himself off the table to sit upright. The younger male took it as an invitation to continue.

"In the bath," he began. "He lifted his arms up and then stopped halfway. His whole body went stiff like he'd just been cut or something. Then he was touching the seal afterwards. You should have seen his face," Sasuke finished quietly, moving his eyes away from Kakashi.

The jounin was quiet for a while, watching the young Uchiha. He seemed to have drifted into thought as he gazed at the floor next to him. Somewhere down the hallway someone flopped down onto a futon, the noise carried easily to them in the silence. Kakashi tried to imagine what kind of face Naruto must have made to get such a serious reaction from Sasuke. Sasuke who cared for no one, Sasuke who was a lone wolf, a self proclaimed avenger, Sasuke who didn't need anyone, but then again, Sasuke who had leapt so recklessly into a battle with a demon for the consciousness of a team mate... Not just a team mate though. A rival, a best friend, maybe even a precious person? Uchiha Sasuke really was a strange person indeed. Indifferent most of the time but also fiercely protective in his own way.

The boy across the table blinked slowly. Kakashi blew out a long breath.

"Well, there's nothing we can do until we get back to Konoha so just keep an eye on him for now Sasuke," he said. Sasuke looked up and frowned a little.

"Why do I have to look after him?" he pouted and the silver haired man sighed.

"I said keep an eye on, not look after. You can handle that can't you? It'll be good training, see if you can do it without him noticing," replied Kakashi. Sasuke let out something that resembled a growl.

"Besides, Naruto only lets his guard down around you and I think you don't mind spoiling him a little, do you Sasuke?" he added pleasantly, grinning as he watched the Uchiha's face twist into shock and stare at him, horrified by what had just passed through his masked lips. He open and closed him mouth stupidly and Kakashi chuckled at the rare moment of weakness until he regained his composure and stood up abruptly.

"Spoil him... I don't know what you're talking about," spat the young ninja as he departed, casting one last famous Uchiha glare over his shoulder.

It's true, mused Kakashi. Sasuke really was the only person that Naruto would let his guard down around. He was always acting tough for Sakura and putting on his determined face in front of Kakashi, but he had seen it when the two boys walked home together sometimes. The man would walk along the wall a while behind them, not spying, he just happened to be taking that way home too.

Naruto would finally allow his proud shoulders to slump after the day of training and his loud voice to die away. The high wall that he had built around him that kept all his 'weak emotions' crumbled a little. And it was true that Sasuke didn't mind spoiling him. Falling in behind his dark haired team mate, the fox boy would drape his arms over Sasuke's shoulders, letting the weight of his battered body fall against Sasuke's back. He'd then refuse to move until 'Sasuke teme' carried him the rest of the way along the secluded road, complaining that he had obviously worked harder than Sasuke so it was natural that the loser should carry the winner. Sasuke would always refuse with an immediate answer at first but when Naruto didn't let go or proceeded to pull Sasuke's hair, try to lick him or some other childish form of protest, his arms would come under the other boy's legs, lifting him onto his back. Of course there was always the exchange of insults and occasionally Sasuke would pick him up just to drop him and escape but usually the look of annoyance was gone after a while and his face would relax into a content expression.

Kakashi smiled. Sasuke was already worried about Naruto; that much was clear, even if the raven himself didn't recognize it as concern. Naruto would be ok for the night with Sasuke keeping an eye on him.

...

Naruto was already asleep when Sasuke got back to the room. He appeared to have begun under the blanket but true to his usual sleeping patterns, he was now half off the futon with only one leg, half his body, his head and one arm still remaining on the futon. Sasuke knelt down next to him and watched his sleeping face with an unimpressed expression.

"Usuratonkachi...What kind of ninja sleeps with such a goofy look and falls asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow?" he murmured. His pale fingers reached out and pinched Naruto's cheek, tugging on it gently, stretching the skin so the thin whiskers distorted. As predicted, Naruto didn't stir at all. Sasuke let go and Naruto turned his head away, muttering something about pork ramen.

"Spoil you..." Sasuke muttered incredulously. "Just because you act selfishly around me and I have to give in to your demands...You're so annoying." He blinked.

But no one spoils you. You've never known it, you don't know how to recognize it so it's so easy to just keep my annoyed face on and give in to what you want...

He sat down properly and poked Naruto in the forehead. The boy was a lot more fun when he was asleep. No yelling, no insults, no arguing.

"That's mine you..." Naruto mumbled sleepily, throwing one arm over his eyes. Sasuke turned the corners of his mouth down disapprovingly. Sleep talking is dangerous; you might give out important information in your sleep. What a Dobe.

Dark eyes drifted to Naruto's stomach. The lower section of his abdomen where the seal was had become exposed from Naruto's sleeping movement. The shape of the spiral looked blurry in the dark. Sasuk shuffled closer to examine it.

"Ngh..." moaned the sleeping boy. Sasuke's eyes didn't leave the seal as Naruto groaned. He listened. It sounds like pain, he decided, his eyes still tracing the swirling pattern. Naruto's whole body became stiff. The seal was acting up again? Fingers gripped the futon as Naruto moaned out again in pain.

What should I do? Wondered Sasuke. The other boy was being too loud. Sasuke glanced at the door to check no one was coming and then looked back to Naruto who was now clenching his teeth, his body beginning to curl in on itself.

Slowly, Sasuke lifted his hand and laid it flat over the seal mark, almost completely covering it with his palm. It was hot, much hotter than the rest of the skin. As he rubbed his hand over it he could feel the difference in temperature between when he was away from the seal and when he was touching it. He lifted his eyes to the window. The curtains were closed but he could hear the rain falling steadily outside. The tattoo pulsed against his palm. Was it Kyuubi's power trying to escape? As he stared into space, his hand swept in small, smooth circles. Somewhere in a memory a woman was singing in the dark on a night like this. He never saw the woman's face in the memory; it hurt too much. All he could recall was the soft touch of her warm hands and the musky scent of her perfume.

Sasuke blinked sleepily as he hand came to a stop and Naruto relaxed next to him. The intense heat of the seal had disappeared, the warmth of his stomach evenly spread beneath his palm.

"Better?" muttered the raven haired boy to the sleeping form as it rolled over and mumbled another something that Sasuke's hazy mind couldn't interpret.

"Baka," he yawned, crawling into his own futon.

...

Naruto woke later after dreaming of someone painting white nothing on the Kyuubi seal with their cool hands. It had been an odd dream but the seal no longer pulsing. He fingered it cautiously and shivered. Without the throbbing and ache in his body he was cold, his teeth chattered as he sat up, pulling his blanket over his head. The tattoo was smooth and hairless like a scar. It really had settled down. What a lucky dream. He looked across the room to where Sasuke lay on his side, snuggled in his blanket. Naruto scowled after a minute, watching his rival's shoulders rise and fall in comfortable even breath. Wasn't Sasuke cold too? The weather in the Land of Water sucks, he thought bitterly. It was cold all the time and it rained constantly. Konoha was much better, sunny and hot and even when it rained it was warm. But here was too cold for the boy with the sun kissed skin and golden hair.

Dragging his blanket with him, Naruto sidled up next to Sasuke's futon and stabbed him roughly in the back of the head.

"Teme," he whispered and stabbed him again. "Ne, Sasuke. Wake up." Sasuke rolled over, his half lidded eyes gleaming dangerously, his expression sour.

"What is it, I'm asleep," he said coldly. Naruto shifted uncomfortably and opened his mouth only to close it without saying anything. Sasuke waited and then sighed and flopped back down as Naruto tried to sort out his face that was swinging between an aggravated frown and an embarrassed grimace.

"I'm cold," he muttered quietly.

"I don't care," replied Sasuke bluntly, rolling over to the far side of the futon and pulling the blanket up around his ears.

Naruto sat for a while, watching the empty space of futon out of the corner of his eye while he pouted angrily at the wall in front of him, shivering, but for some reason not able to get up and go back to his own bed. His eyes threatened to close but he forced them back open. A small growl of frustration started in his chest. His legs were going to sleep and Sasuke still hadn't moved back into the middle of the futon. Naruto yawned and rubbed his eyes, chancing a glance at Sasuke who didn't appear to be moving anytime soon. The room was freezing, the scent of rain crisp and sharp in the cold air. It hurt his chest when he breathed in. Eventually exhaustion got the best of him he climbed carefully under the blanket, making sure to keep a firm frown on his face. It's not like I want to. I'm just really cold, he added to himself. It was warm where Sasuke had been lying. Moving very slowly, he tried to get comfortable without disrupting the blanket like maybe if he didn't make any noise the other boy wouldn't notice the presence of another person in his bed.

"Any dignity you had disappeared the moment you got into bed with me," said Sasuke suddenly as he rolled over to face Naruto, his eyes still closed.

"Shut up," said Naruto, too warm and tired to bite back properly. Sasuke wriggled closer and closer until his forehead was nearly resting against Naruto's and the blonde's eyes opened slightly in surprise. Long dark hair tickled his face, even breathing washed across his cheeks for the second time that night. He breathed in. Sasuke's breath was strangely sweet, the soft scent dazed Naruto a bit. He closed his eyes and let it touch his eyelids. Who would have thought that a cold bastard like Sasuke would be so warm and have such a gentle smell?

Sasuke moved closer again, pressing his body to Naruto's. The smaller, blonde haired boy smiled gently as Sasuke cuddled up next to him.

"I didn't know you were a snuggler, Teme," said Naruto, his words slurring with sleep. He reached out one hand lazily and stroked Sasuke's soft hair in mock fondness, pulling on the ends when his fingers reached the tips.

"I'm not," Sasuke muttered back, batting Naruto's hand away. "I just want more room on _my _futon." Naruto pulled his hand back under the cover and tried to find a place between their bodies to put it, his face flushed a little as he realized that he was in fact in bed, cuddled up with another male. Another male that happened to be Sasuke.

"Yeah well... It's warmer this way so deal with it..." he said. A knee came to rest on top of Naruto's as it moved into a more comfortable position.

"Ne, Naruto?" Sasuke's hand came between them and he poked him lightly in the stomach. "It's ok now?"

Naruto opened his eyes to find Sasuke's eyes on him in the dark, heavily lidded, taking on a greyer tone in the presence of the darkness. It was rare to see Sasuke wearing such a face. He wasn't smirking or frowning, his face held almost no expression. He wasn't moving, just watching.

Sasuke was most beautiful like this, decided Naruto. Most beautiful when he was completely still; breathing evenly, waiting patiently. Most beautiful when he wasn't being a ninja; his face somehow longer and more oval without the forehead protector. Most beautiful when he wasn't speaking at all. Naruto's heart skipped a beat, the inside of his mouth tasted funny.

"You suddenly being so nice kind of makes me feel sick, Teme," he laughed. He felt Sasuke scowl as Naruto ruined the uncommon, almost friendly atmosphere between the two of them. The Uchiha then tensed in hesitation and then after a long pause asked, "Is the thought that I want to be nice to you so horrible?" Naruto's face pulled into a soft frown. Horrible...? No. Scary...? A bit.

"It kind of freaks me out, because you're never nice to me," replied Naruto slowly. Sasuke's sweet breath touched his face and he closed his eyes, inhaling deeply.

"Do you... dislike it? Do you hate this?" asked Sasuke. He moved a way a bit and chilly air flooded the space between them. Naruto shuffled over to steal Sasuke's warmth again.

"Dislike it...? Not really." Sasuke's body, so close to his was warm, the even rhythm of his breathing was lulling Naruto to sleep. He felt weak and vulnerable. He didn't want Sasuke to see him like this. He hoped the other boy also had his eyes closed.

"Really...?" murmured the young Uchiha and Naruto laughed softly for a reason he forgot as soon as his lips parted to make the noise.

"You don't dislike sleeping with someone you hate?" The words came sleepily, the normal sharp edge to them gone for the moment. The blonde ninja wrinkled his nose in annoyance. So tired... Shh Sasuke Shh. The knee that was lying on his nudged him, pressing for an answer. Naruto sighed.

"You are my rival... But I don't hate you the same as I used to, because now..." He stopped, falling asleep as he spoke. Does Sasuke feel like I do now? Wondered Naruto. Light like my body could drift away but still so dream heavy that I can't move at all. What a soothing new feeling. He had never taken this long to fall asleep before.

"Now?" prompted Sasuke quietly.

"...now... It's alright because you're also my best friend..."

Naruto didn't hear if Sasuke replied. Sleep reached up and pulled him down and the gentle whoosh of Sasuke's sweet breath disappeared...

_Oyasumi..._


	8. Chapter 8

_Sorry its a little shorter than last chapter. It seems around about this length is my limit. :Sigh: I tried my best to make it longer but in the end this is as far as i can go . hehe. Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews. You're legendary ^_^_

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Sakura gripped the door frame for support.

What's going on with my body?

Her breath was slow and shaky and her legs were getting weak, her knuckles white from how hard she was grasping the wood.

I shouldn't be so worked up over this, its just some kind of accident, she thought as her eyes jumped to the roughly carved number on the wooden door frame to check. Yes, this was Sasuke and Naruto room but the girl was having problems accepting that the two people in the room really were her two team mates. It was already late morning and Kakashi had sent Sakura to make sure the boys were up. When she arrived she had found this. She shook her head.

I should just go in there and beat Naruto, the pink haired girl reasoned forcefully, setting her eyebrows in a deep frown, but all the fight left her body as she looked back to the two forms.

Both were cuddled up in Sasuke's futon, wrapped in one thick blanket. Sakura blinked away something that was stinging her eyes. What was the numb feeling that was draining all her energy?

"Come on, what's wrong with you?" she murmured to herself quietly, staring at the two boys. Naruto was curled up against Sasuke, his head turned into his shoulder with his face hidden, one hand holding onto Sasuke's navy shirt. Sakura bit her lip, waiting for the anger that she usually felt when Naruto did something annoying to arise. Nothing came. Nothing but a strange tightness in her chest.

Where is my anger? Why aren't I really mad about this? Naruto is snuggling with _my _Sasuke kun! She frowned at the blonde boy, trying provoke some sort of feeling. She felt her features begin to tremble. It was hard to breathe. What was it about this situation that was leaving her so breathless?

She looked to Sasuke; one arm wrapped around Naruto, holding the other boy against him. Even in sleep, his face was so captivating she was instantly dazzled and couldn't look away. She stared for a long time at his sleeping face before she suddenly realized why her body was weak, why she couldn't breathe, why there was no anger prickling at her skin. Her sea foam eyes widened and she felt light headed. Her blood felt like it was flowing backwards, rushing all the way to her heart.

Two boys so close to each other. It was wrong. Two boys wrapped in such an embrace. It was wrong. Two boys fitting so perfectly side by side. It was wrong. But Sasuke and Naruto; so close, sleeping so comfortably next to each other. Why did it look so right? Why did her Sasuke kun's face look so at ease, why was he holding Naruto so closely to him, why was Naruto clutching him like that? Why did it all seem so natural?

Sakura breathed in raggedly, bringing her hand to her face. It was wet. I'm crying, she realized. Sasuke kun and Naruto... Was there actually more to this rivalry/friendship? There were so many clues, now that she thought about it that would suggest so. Her shoulders shook violently but no noise came from her quaking body to accompany the tears or to release the tightness in her chest. Could it be true?

Sasuke never paid any attention to his admirers and even once he had become closer with her he hadn't shown interest in anything but distant friendship. But with Naruto, Sasuke felt so much. She smiled sadly at the memory of Sasuke's expression of superiority as he was hammered by Naruto's insults that clearly had no effect. He looked almost happy. His handsome face was never more alive than it was when he was with Naruto and the same went for the goofy blonde too. He always seemed to glow from the inside out whenever he was with Sasuke, even when they were fighting his striking eyes were always that little bit brighter; always danced with a little more blue fire. They were constantly together. Sakura could barely picture one without the other. In her mind there were always two boys, side by side, one in navy, one in orange. Always together, with some sort of smile on their faces; a smirk for Sasuke and a grin for Naruto.

What should I do? She slumped against the door frame and slid to the ground. Neither boy stirred. The pink haired kunoichi gazed at Naruto. His hair looked soft and downy, mussed slightly.

I always thought it would be me, she told him silently, not feeling the tears falling over her cheeks, not really feeling anything apart from the dull ache of tension in her chest. I always thought I'd be the one to heal Sasuke kun and then he'd bring me into his arms and hold me like he's holding you... But it's always been you, Naruto. You, who Sasuke treated differently, you who have always been saving him with that stupid smile of yours.

I wonder, she thought lifting her tear stained face to the ceiling. Is it selfish to wish this isn't happening...

I know I love Sasuke kun... But I do love Naruto too... I love them both and somewhere along the way, without me even noticing it, they have become the most important people to me. Her fingers curled into soft fists by her sides.

"_Okaasan, what's love?"_

"_Love? Love is... having the desire to make someone happy without wanting anything in return. It doesn't even matter if they don't love you back...True love is when the best thing is seeing that person smile."_

Sakura clenched her eyes shut. Love had seemed so easy back when she had asked her mother that question. Just seeing that person smile... wanting nothing in return... What should I do...? Sasuke had always belonged to her. Some of his other admirers had even given up on him a bit when she had been put on the same team as Konoha's biggest heart throb, and now he was being taken away from her. Could she really give him up to Naruto? Did she want to? Maybe.

If what was happening was just friendship, could she accept being so left out by both boys? Wouldn't she feel less abandoned if the bond was of a different kind? But Sasuke was the only love she had known. She had liked him for as long as she could remember. Her eyes wandered back to his face.

Oh Sasuke kun... Do you really like that idiot? Do you even realize how you feel? You're so mysterious and distant... Can't you see that there's a cute girl right in front of you?

Sakura laughed softly. What was with that last thought? How selfish... Even though I can see now, that there is a chance that Sasuke kun likes Naruto as more than a friend, I'm still trying to ruin his chance at a happiness he probably hasn't had in a long time with my love for him.

I've always been selfish...she thought, not bitterly, just observing something in herself, accepting it without a second thought. I'm always forcing my feelings on Sasuke kun. I want him all for myself so I try to push Naruto away from the person he might care about the most. I don't do it on purpose, but I can't help it. Sakura sighed painfully. Right now, what is love? For this situation, what is love? To see that person smile... What do I have to do? The whole hallway was quiet, most of the rooms occupants were already up. She was alone.

"Let go?" she whispered, her voice sounded strange in the silence. Sasuke kun, to make you smile, to make you happy, do I have to let go? She stood slowly. The thought of Sasuke's smile, such a sight that she wasn't sure she had actually ever seen genuinely made her heart flutter and some of the tightness disappear.

"Letting go, is that all I can do for you?" the girl murmured from the doorway. Love right now is... letting go? I don't know if I can...

At that moment, Naruto rolled over.

"Sasuke teme, you're such a jerk," he muttered, sleep talking loudly. Sasuke's face wrinkled into a frown as he slipped back into consciousness. Sakura stepped away from the door before she could be seen.

"Shut up, you Usuratonkachi..." she heard Sasuke growl sleepily. The girl laughed lightly as she started down the hallway, wiping away tears that still hadn't finished.

I can't stop crying, but it guess its fine for now. I can let go of him slowly, because neither of them get it yet. She closed her eyes and smiled. It'll take time, for all of us... So just for a while longer, allow me to be selfish. Please keep quietly accepting my affection and my constant pushing, just until you two realize... And when that time comes, please, don't leave me behind. We are still a team, a three man squad no matter what you two might feel, so don't you dare abandon me. She turned a corner. It's all right for now.

…

It was cloudy overhead as they began the journey back to Konoha. They were taking a different path home so that they wouldn't have to pass the battlefield from the previous day. It seemed like such a long time ago to the jounin, much longer than just 24 hours. Time had been passing too slowly for his liking lately. He sighed. It would be hot and muggy in Konoha with the thick cloud. Just the kind of weather he hated at the end of a mission. He'd hand his report into the Hokage and then drag Naruto off to the hospital to get the seal checked out, he was still concerned about that even though Sasuke had given him a nod at the breakfast table to let him know that the night had gone smoothly.

Kakashi lifted his eyes to the three young ninja in front of him out of habit; he seemed to be always checking on them. Well, he thought, I suppose it's only natural, they are a bit dysfunctional at times. Sakura and Naruto were walking together, Naruto slightly in front with his hands behind his head, face turned to the skyward. Sakura was dragging her feet a little walking just one step behind. Sasuke was in the lead. Apart from Sakura's feet, everything seemed pretty normal between them. He didn't dwell on Sakura too long; he had done his part towards cheering her up the day before. Someone else's turn, he thought lazily. As if he had heard him, Naruto turned to the kunoichi. Her face lifted and she picked up her feet, laughing gently at something the boy had said. Kakashi let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. Subconsciously he had been a bit worried again, another part of his mind running through memories from the Country of Waves mission that wasn't really that long ago; picking out the similarities between that mission and this one.

The horrible red chakra that had burst from the walls of the house of ice mirrors; the same red chakra that they had revealed itself yesterday, the dusty green eyes that darkened in anguish on that day that Sasuke had "died"; the same green eyes that had painfully shed tears before him. He watched the boy and the girl's interaction with fond eyes and smiled when Sasuke dropped back to add his sarcastic foot note, glad that they were all alright. They had really pulled together and become a team, so different to the three kids who had showed up for the first day of training back then. The dark avenger who thought he was so much better than the rest, the difficult brat who wanted to achieve his big dream without any help and the giggling fangirl. Maybe it was time to test them again soon. He wondered idly where he had put those bells.

…

The journey back to Konoha was fairly boring and the young Uchiha was happy to finally pass through the big wooden gate. Kakashi told them to come for training tomorrow and then they all went their separate ways; Sakura and Sasuke heading to their houses and Kakashi and Naruto off in the direction of the hospital. On the way home he saw Team 10. Yamanaka Ino painfully reminded him about the New Year's festival coming up while making eyes at him. He stopped politely to listen without turning his face to her before leaving them behind. He hated the New Year's Festival. In the years before the massacre, the Uchiha family had always gone together, but now it was just another suffocating memory, the scenery lit with the soft glow of lanterns, everyone's smiling faces blurred and dark.

Sasuke frowned as he approached the part of the village that was painted red and white; a locked away part of him started crying and screaming, but he barely heard it after so long. Sasuke calmly walked towards the big house at the end of the road. His lips didn't part into "tadaima" as he unlocked the front door. No one would answer anyway.

…

"Iruka sensei! I'm having miso today ok?" The blonde haired boy turned his face up to the man walking beside him, his blue eyes round and bright, still holding all the warmth of the sun even though the day was ending. He had met Naruto as he and Kakashi came out of the hospital. Naruto looked fine, pouting a little but unharmed. The boy was tugging Kakashi's sleeve, yelling about being treated to ramen after being dragged all the way to the hospital. The academy teacher had watched them approach and then once they met had offered to take Naruto off the jounin's hands, smiling gently at Naruto. Kakashi thanked him headed home, complaining lightly about the heat.

"Alright Naruto," replied Iruka, reaching out to ruffle Naruto's hair. The boy grinned.

Iruka leaned on the counter of the ramen shop, watching Naruto throw back his meal. For a moment he just watched the boy, taking in how he had grown. Was he really that trouble maker from the academy, who was always pulling pranks and never paid any attention to what his teacher was trying to teach him? He was so big now, he'd grown taller in the year, still below average height compared to the other boys but he couldn't be far off Sasuke's height now.

Sasuke. He'd never understood that boy, but somehow Naruto seemed to have developed a real affection for the dark haired Uchiha; a strange kind of friendship. They were complete opposites. One bright and full of energy like the sun, the other silent and mysterious like the moon, but now it seemed the moon was the one that the little sun was most fond of. In an odd kind of way. Even when Naruto was with Iruka, his eyes didn't hold the same light they did when he was with the Sasuke.

"So Naruto, are you going to the New Year's Festival," asked Iruka, tightening his ponytail. The boy looked at him out of the corner of his eye as he ate.

"Dunno, if the others go I guess I will too." Replied the boy, stopping his mouth long enough to speak. He lifted his brilliant blue eyes to the lanterns overhead in thought. "I'll have to get a kimono if I do. I wonder if Kakashi sensei has one... Sasuke definitely won't lend me one..." The older male scowled a little but evened out his features before the boy could see; a bit hurt that Naruto thought of the silver haired jounin before him.

When Iruka had lost Naruto and the others to their new squad leader he had to admit he had been a bit jealous of Kakashi. He had been so used to seeing each of their faces everyday. Being so close to them, spending so much time with them that he didn't even notice them growing up before him. It was always hard to give up students, but now he was starting to think differently. Sometimes its good to watch from the back, thought Iruka. Being like this with Naruto, just watching, not seeing him everyday, it means I get to see the change better than anyone else.

"So Naruto, why were you at the hospital? Did you get hurt on your mission?" asked Iruka, blinking as Naruto throw back his second bowl of ramen.

"Ah. That. It's because. Of that damn seal," the boy replied in between shoving noodles in his mouth. The chuunin's expression switched quickly.

"What about it?" Iruka leant in, his eyebrows pulled together into a worried frown, his lips in a tight line. Naruto looked up.

"The seal was hurting but the medics at the hospital couldn't tell us anything. No one really knows much about the seal," he replied, his face open and unconcerned. Iruka's frown deepened. He ran his thumb across the tip of the long scar that stretched over his nose nervously.

"Is it really ok just to leave it at that? What if something happens to you?"

"I'll be fine. I won't let anything happen."

"It's not really up to you..." said Iruka. Naruto set down his chopsticks and then turned to him, grinning.

"Don't worry, just believe in me. I won't let anything happen. I promise!"

The chuunin pulled back, dazed as Naruto's energy burst from his body with those words. Iruka suddenly felt light. He smiled.

"Ok then, Naruto, I'll just have to trust you."

"Alright! Another bowl then please!" cried Naruto, reclaiming his chopsticks and waving them in the air.

"Another?"


	9. Chapter 9

_Hi! Chapter 9 is here ^_^ Kudos to everyone who is reading and reviewing. Reviews are the best part of doing all of this so feel free to tell me what you think. Love to hear from you guys! Wowee! This chapter is quite possibly my longest ever. I'm so easily amazed, its probably only like 50 words longer or something lol. Anyways,_

_Enjoy!_

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Sasuke woke slowly. The morning light was dull and washed out, trickling feebly through the crack in his curtains. He rubbed his eyes and sat up, looking around his room. His room that had been unchanged for years. Well, almost unchanged. Lifting his dark eyes to the window sill he gazed at the picture from a distance, smiling a little. Everyone looked like such idiots. Kakashi and Sakura, all smiles and he and Naruto with sour expressions. Lingering on the blonde, Sasuke traced the glare across the frame to himself. Maybe we should have smiled for the picture, he thought. He kind of wished that he and Naruto were smiling. It was the only picture the Uchiha boy had since the day of his clan's massacre, the only proof that he hadn't been slaughtered alongside them. He glanced at the clock on his wall and got up, reaching for a shirt. Training today. Sasuke pulled back the curtains and was met by water streaming down the glass. In the rain. Great.

The air was thick outside. It was muggy and uncomfortable. Hot and wet. An unpleasant mix. Team 7 stood in the middle of the training ground in front of Kakashi who was crouched atop one of the three posts. Every young face looked thoroughly unimpressed as they stood in the rain.

"Kakashi sensei! Can't we do this tomorrow?" moaned Naruto, shaking water from his blonde hair. Sakura frowned as she touched the front of her hair where her dainty arches had fallen flat and stuck to the sides of her face.

"No. Rain isn't going to hurt you," replied the jounin, raising his voice slightly over the rain. Sasuke folded his arms, pressing his warm, wet shirt against his chest. He grimaced.

"Today," said Kakashi, grinning under his mask. "We are going to see just how much you've grown." Each young ninja's eyes widened as he pulled two bells from behind his back. They jingled and all three leant in, drawn by the sound. The man laughed and leapt lightly from his perch. The bells clinked together as he landed close to the three. They all stepped back. Sasuke pushed his hair of his face and dropped down a little into fighting stance. The others did the same, watching their mentor. They all knew the rules, they just needed his word.

"Go."

The clearing was empty.

…

Sakura crept along the line of bushes, checking constantly. Left, right, above, below. Where were Sasuke and Naruto, they only way they could get the bells was as a team. But more importantly, where was Kakashi sensei? She cast a glance over her shoulder. He had got her last time from behind. Not this time. Hopefully. She wasn't entirely confident in her ability. She hoped Naruto and Sasuke were looking for her too.

The line of bushes ended and flowed into a clearing. Sakura crouched where she was for a while; sufficiently hidden, staying completely still, watching for a long time in the rain before deciding it was safe. She walked soundlessly to the edge of the clearing and made a second check.

Suddenly, the bushes rustled to her left. Naruto and Sasuke came through, the blonde supporting the raven, one arm slung across his shoulders, hazy figures in the heavy rain. Sakura relaxed and turned to them as Naruto noticed her.

"Sakura chan! Thank goodness! Come over here and give me a hand with this stupid guy!" he called. Sakura started to walk forwards, but gasped and picked up her feet into a run as she spotted six kunai in Sasuke's side; he was drenched in blood.

"Kakashi sensei is being really rough this time," said Naruto quietly, laying the Uchiha on the grass. "He even got Sasuke..." He looked concerned as he carefully placed the other boys head on the grass. The girl's heart clenched a bit but now was not the time. She reached to touch Sasuke but stopped when he opened his eyes and looked straight at Naruto.

"N.. Naruto.. Sorry.. I'm.. Sorry..." he mumbled squeezing his eyes into a blink as he tried to clear the rain away. Sakura's green eyes flicked to the blonde's face.

"He must have lost too much blood, ne, Sakura chan," said Naruto nervously, avoiding Sasuke's eyes. Sakura looked back to Sasuke and realized her hand was still frozen in mid air.

At the same moment that she pulled her hand away; Sasuke's pale one came up and bypassed Sakura's to grab the collar of Naruto's jacket. Both green and blue eyes widened as Naruto was pulled down, his lips parted in surprise. Sasuke lifted his head and they met for a second time. Sakura felt hot tears prick in her eyes as she recoiled.

It couldn't be...

She was paralyzed, watching everything at an unnaturally slow pace. Sasuke's eyes were squeezed shut as he pressed his lips to Naruto's. The blonde's cobalt blue eyes closed slowly too, overcoming his initial surprise. His hand came behind Sasuke's head to support him. She couldn't move. A choked sob rose in her chest as Naruto responded, tilting his chin and kissing the other boy back.

No... No... No... It can't be real, get a grip. Sakura willed herself to move.

"How cruel..." she murmured, her eyes wide. She reached for a shuriken, a kunai, anything. It had to stop, she couldn't take it. The hot tears of panic and unbearable heartbreak refused to spill, pooling at her eyes, blurring the scene. Her fingers touched the cold metal. Naruto and Sasuke parted and then came together again.

"No.. No..." she gripped the kunai knife, her hand trembling. It's too much. How could you? She dropped the kunai. Naruto ran his fingers through Sasuke's dark hair. Suddenly Sakura was angry, a burning prickling at her skin. Adrenalin pumped through her as she became properly aware of the man's presence. She could move again. Lifting her whole body onto one hand she twisted, pivoting on her palm and swung her legs out, putting all the weight of her body into the kick. There was a rush of air around her as she passed right through the spot where he had been behind her. The genjutsu was released, leaving her alone in the clearing, now on her feet, panting, now feeling the rain beat on her shoulders again.

"How cruel... Kakashi sensei..."

…

Maybe... he had been a little too harsh. Attacking a woman's heart wasn't something he found particularly honorable, but Kakashi didn't know that she would react so strongly. The situation hadn't been very convincing at all. Sasuke's injuries were too extensive for a training exercise even if they played by the rule "train like you mean to kill", and then Naruto and Sasuke kissing like that; there was absolutely no way something like that would happen right in front of her.

As expected, Sakura had realized it was genjutsu fairly early; exactly how Kakashi had planned it because it was more of a test. Last time he had got her with genjutsu she had screamed and fainted. She had faired better this time, picking up on it quickly and possibly playing along until she knew he was close. But her reaction made Kakashi wonder. Sakura knew it was an illusion and he thought that she was probably playing along with it for the most part but the way she had backed away like it was hurting her seemed real. The silver haired man wished he could have seen her expression. Her shoulders and back had given little away about how she really feeling as he snuck up on her. Perhaps Sakura had a theory similar to his own regarding the other two members of the team. 'Cruel' she has said. Kakashi smiled as he leapt from tree to tree, wondering if she would ever forgive him for being so mean.

Kakashi stopped on a wide tree branch and lifted his forehead protector. The main thing he had to look out for was Sasuke's sharingan. If the Uchiha caught sight of him with it activated he'd be able to track the jounin's movements and lead the others to him. He scanned the surrounding area with his sharp eye, breathing in the thick, warm air.

From what he could gather, Sasuke and Naruto were together and heading for Sakura who was still in the clearing where he had left her. Good, trying to work as a team; much better than last time, smiled Kakashi. He sighed and rolled his shoulders. The rain had soaked all the way through his jounin vest making it heavy. He reached down and felt for the bells, they were smooth and cold against his fingertips. Leaping to a new branch he covered his eye back up and changed direction.

"There's no way they can ever catch me if I keep running from them. Maybe I'll give them an opportunity," he said to himself as he started to head back to the starting point.

The bells at his hip jingled happily beneath the drum of the rain as Kakashi walked out into the open. He smiled under his damp mask and looked around casually. They were here already, he could feel them. Impressive. What will you do now, Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura, Uchiha Sasuke? Let's see how much you've grown.

Three Narutos burst from the tree behind him. One coming in from the left, one looping round to come in from the right, one on the ground running. Each was charging in, yelling loudly, arms outstretched, all of them coming for the bells. The man sighed. Reckless as usual. He stepped back and all three smacked into each other. Three shadow clones dissipated. Not so reckless? As Kakashi's foot lifted and came back a wire tripped and six paper bombs attached to small logs came flying at him from every direction. Sakura's work. He leapt up but as soon as he did he realized his mistake. Suddenly a dark shadow was behind him, red eyes blazing. Damn it! Naruto and Sakura leapt in from neighboring trees. Three pairs of arms wound around their sensei's body and stuck their hands together with chakra. Unbreakable, sealed together just as he had taught them to do with their feet and trees. It was too late; Kakashi was trapped, covered in three small, wet bodies. They fell and hit the soft ground skidding in one big heap, sinking into the mud. Kakashi opened his eyes and met Naruto's big blue ones looking up at him from where he was tangled in the man's legs, two shiny bells on a string dangling from between his teeth.

"Got you," muttered Sasuke from his left.

…

Covered in mud, hot and sore from impact Sasuke walked between Naruto and Sakura. To his left, Naruto was unusually quiet. Tired? To his right Sakura was humming and combing her fingers through her long pink hair. The rain had let up a bit and her voice weaved amongst the raindrops to his ears.

"Ne, Sasuke kun, Naruto, are you guys going to the festival? It's tomorrow you know," said Sakura suddenly, turning her dirty face to them. Sasuke blinked the rain out of his eyes. "Let's all go together ok?" She said, closing her eyes into a smile. The raven began to shake his head but Kakashi put his hand on his shoulder.

"They'd love to come," he answered for the two. Sasuke glared but Kakashi's expression was strange, the smile etched into the mask was nervous. Turning, his eyes back to his pink haired team mate he saw why. Her smile was gone. Why was she making such a sour face at Kakashi? Nothing had seemed weird between them until now...

"Don't think your help has made me forgive you Sensei," she said bitterly. Naruto was standing to the side, still quiet. Sasuke stood still. The girl and the man locked eyes for a minute. Kakashi laughed nervously.

"Sakura, I really didn't mean that like th-"

"See you tomorrow night then!" Sakura said cutting him off, her voice bright and her face completely transforming as she turned on her heel and departed.

"What was that about?" asked Naruto softly.

"Nothing," replied Kakashi. "Nothing at all..."

…

One of the things Uchiha Sasuke was very thankful for was the bath _and _shower in the Uchiha house. Sometimes soaking just didn't do it for him. In all honesty, the boy was a little picky, with his food, his clothes, his friends... But one of the things that he liked the most was standing under the shower, letting the water run over his slender pale body, his arms hanging lifelessly at his sides.

Sasuke closed his eyes against the soft water droplets. It was quiet through out the house; the only sounds were the two running waters, the shower and the rain outside. The water at his feet had dirtied with the mud from his body and then cleared a long time ago but he continued to stand. For some reason, the dark haired boy felt most peaceful in the shower. Normally he was tightly wound and quick to hit and snarl; always appearing indifferent and easily irritated. But here, the heat thickened the air he breathed, filling him with warmth and a strange sense of safety. Safety he rarely found anywhere else.

"Teme! Where are you!" The silence was shattered. Sasuke jumped and screwed up his face in anger. Loud footsteps echoed down the hallway. The water seized as he pulled the lever down. Baka...

He felt his shoulders rise in frustration.

"Sasuke?" The voice was right outside the bathroom door. The door handle rattled as the person outside tried to open it. It was locked. Sasuke sighed and stepped out, breathing in.

"I'll wait in your room ok?" Naruto's voice was surprisingly gentle on the other side. The footsteps faded away. Sasuke stood with one hand on the door. What was with this feeling? It was weird. Anxiousness?

Apparently Naruto had found Sasuke's room. When the Uchiha walked into the room the other boy was flopped on his bed, one arm over his eyes. Silently, he approached the bed and climbed onto the end, sitting in front of Naruto's feet.

"What do you want? Get out of my house," he said bluntly, frowning. The blonde sat up slowly.

"I remembered, in my dream," he began, his face so serious Sasuke nearly laughed. "When the seal was hurting me, I had a dream about someone painting me." Naruto's blue eyes burrowed into his. An intense stare. Sasuke stared right back, unblinking, waiting for him to come to his point, gradually becoming impatient with the other boy.

"What's that got to do with me, Usuratonkachi," he said, leaning back and locking his elbows out, his palms sinking into the navy comforter.

"It was you."

Sasuke's eyes widened for a moment, running through the memory of touching Naruto at the inn as he slept. Now that he thought about it, it was a strange kind of action, but it was to make sure the Dobe didn't slow them down, right?

"So what, it was just a dream," Sasuke replied, his eyes drifting to a space of wall past the boy's blonde hair, wet with the light nighttime rain outside.

"I know you did something, Sasuke." Black and blue skimmed each other, one reaching out, trying to catch the other, one slipping past, refusing to be caught. Wasn't that always the way with the two of them...

"Do it again," Naruto said softly, his voice sounded choked, an unfamiliar begging to it.

"No way."

Naruto pulled away, a hand coming to his stomach to grip his shirt.

"Please, it hurts, if it didn't I wouldn't be here. I don't want to ask you of all people, but whatever you did is fine, please just..." he trailed off and doubled over, clearly the waves of pain were becoming stronger. Sasuke's steady eyes lowered to his small pathetic form.

"Come on, even you aren't this cold..." Naruto' voice cracked, and shuddered into a ragged breath. The raven furrowed his eyebrows.

"Are you crying?" He asked. Naruto barely ever shed tears, at least not for himself...

"It's because it hurts Teme!" The other boy cried back.

Suddenly Naruto lifted his head and there it was again, that unusual shade of blue; that emotion Sasuke couldn't identify. The Uchiha inhaled sharply through his nose as the other boy launched himself forward, his arms came forward and around Sasuke's torso, locking around him. Both ninja fell backward onto the soft bed. Naruto's whole body was burning up. It was too hot to stay like this but neither made any move to separate. The blonde's hot breath on Sasuke's neck was short and shallow.

"Naruto..."

…

Sasuke's hair was damp. It smelt like him, not like shampoo or soap, just of him. The unbearable burning that had consumed Naruto's body intensified. He tightened his hold on the Sasuke. He didn't know what had made him do it but being physically close to Sasuke had seemed like the only way to make the stubborn bastard understand. Maybe somehow he would feel just how much pain he was in.

"You know, I couldn't see your face clearly before," murmured Naruto. "There are all these black spots and I'm so hot I can't breathe. It's like I'm on fire." Sasuke tensed against him. It was so hot like this. He wouldn't last much longer. Whatever Sasuke had done, and he _knew_ he had done something; he had to make him do it again. Anything was fine. Just make it stop.

"Sasuke. It really hurts."

"I don't care." Naruto blinked, his eyes nearly closed. All his strength had dropped from his body, through the bed and onto the floor when they fell; the red flame inside was swallowing him. Another excruciatingly hot tear fell into the soft comforter. 'I don't care', he thought, his head cloudy with deep orange smoke, his thoughts being destroyed by the wild flame. It means nothing between us... Sasuke says it all the time...

"_Sasuke, I'm hungry."_

"_I don't care." But somehow, with Sasuke in the lead, they always ended up outside the ramen stand._

"_Sasuke, carry me, I'm tired."_

"_I don't care." But there his arms were, coming under his legs, lifting him._

"_Sasuke, I'm cold."_

"_I don't care." But even so, he rolled over to make room for him on the futon._

"_Sasuke, it really hurts."_

"_I don't care..."_

Sasuke's body beneath him lifted both of them; Naruto fell back, flat onto his back. He couldn't move by himself anymore. Sasuke's hands felt cool against his skin, pushing his shirt up and then coming back to rest over the seal.

"Just like before, ne?" The other boy's voice was dull, uncertain. Naruto's blue eyes searched for him. He couldn't see Sasuke's face anymore, it was blocked out by the inky black spots, but his hands on him were enough. They made slow circles, painting the spiral in white nothing with same pale, soothing hands from his dream.


	10. Chapter 10

_I'm very sorry that this took a while. For what felt like the longest time I was suffering from writers block and absolutely nothing would come at all! BUT! Its over! Thanks for waiting, enjoy!_

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When Naruto woke again he was lying on his side facing a window. It was cooler now; the hot mugginess and the painful burning gone. The steady breathing of another person rose and fell against his shoulder blades as they lay back to back. Naruto blinked sleepily. He was at Sasuke's...What time was it? He tried to retrace the previous events of the day.

The light had fading away when he had started heading over the unfamiliar side of the village, searching for Sasuke. He remembered going through all the empty houses calling for him before coming to the big one at the end. By that time it was dark. He'd passed out not long after that with Sasuke's hands on him. He blushed a little at how pathetic and needy he had sounded at the time. But how long had he slept for?

"Teme?" Naruto rolled over and stared into the dark.

"Dobe." Sasuke was awake.

"What time is it?"

"Dunno," replied the other boy. "Early."

"Turn over, it's weird talking to your back," said Naruto, reached out and poking him in what felt like his shoulder. Sighing, Sasuke turned over. The blonde could see his silhouette now, his eyes becoming accustomed to the black of the room.

"What is it?" asked a tired voice. Naruto faltered. He didn't really have anything to talk about but sleeping facing Sasuke's back felt wrong. He waited... Sasuke breathed out. There it was; his sweet warm breath. Sasuke didn't even like sweets, it was so strange. Naruto closed his eyes. He wanted to fall asleep again with it.

"What do you want?" asked Sasuke again.

Nothing. I want nothing. He let his eyes close again.

"You know," murmured Naruto, eyes still closed, deciding that if he didn't talk he was in danger of being hit or insulted. "One of my favorite things now is sleeping next to someone else. I really love it..." There was a sudden moment where the blonde tensed, thinking Sasuke might taunt him for saying something like that but it passed when the other boy breathed in and then back out.

"What are you talking about, "someone else"? The only one you've ever slept next to is me," replied the Uchiha, quoting Naruto's his words back.

Then I love sleeping next to you, the blonde replied internally, pulling his face in a soft pout to mask his thoughts even though probably couldn't see him very well.

"I still love it."

Sasuke was silent for a while.

"Love," he said after a long time. "What do you think that is?" Naruto opened his eyes.

"Shouldn't you know a little more about that than me, Teme?" he asked. An image of Sasuke's mother, the beautiful Uchiha san that he had seen doing her shopping sometimes came to mind. She was so gentle looking, her smile so soft and pretty. She must have loved Sasuke so much... And Sasuke, Sasuke must have loved her so much... Naruto's eyes widened and suddenly he felt Sasuke's stare, cold and glaring.

"Ah, sorry..." he said softly, shrinking away from the Uchiha a bit. He had to admit that was rather insensitive of him. The tension eased and there was silence between them again. Again, it was Sasuke who spoke first.

"I think I've forgotten what it feels like." Naruto blinked at Sasuke's shadowed form. He was lying on his side so that they could both fit on his single bed.

"I don't think you can forget that kind of feeling, Teme," stated Naruto into the dark. "I mean, it's not like you don't have things you love now right? Don't you love Team 7?" Sasuke stayed quiet.

"You love Sakura chan and Kakashi sensei and me a bit don't you? We're like a family now." Naruto's eyes flicked back and forth across Sasuke's face that was only just visible.

"A family? Not really. If we were a family you would have a crush on your own sister and Kakashi is hardly a father figure," replied Sasuke, snorting softly through his nose. Naruto could feel him smirking, but the air between them felt a sad and lonely. He frowned.

"It's not like that," Naruto said forcefully, and then continued more softly. "For me, family isn't being related and having the same blood. It's the people who are the most precious to me, and right now, Team 7 is my number one." Sasuke tensed beside him.

This was all much too serious for the hyper active, happy go lucky blonde. Sasuke was never this serious, never this personal, but the thing that was most wrong was the face Naruto knew Sasuke was wearing. He'd never seen the face on his friend, but he knew it, he'd felt it, his own features had twisted into the same face many times. A look of pain and unbearable loneliness. But Sasuke had never made that face in front of Naruto before. It made the smaller boy anxious. He wanted Sasuke to end the conversation with one of his 'discussion stopper' remarks that Naruto never had a comeback to.

"Besides I don't know about Sakura and me anymore, I mean she's more like a protective, kind of violent mother hen than a sister don't you think? Sure, she's cute but super scary when she's mad!" said Naruto, trying to lighten the air.

"Yeah," said Sasuke distantly. It just wasn't working. The raven was still quiet and Naruto felt him pulling away. Not physically; his body was still close, he hadn't moved in a while, but he was pulling away. His heart was moving, withdrawing. It made the blonde uneasy.

"You're such a lonely guy Sasuke!" said Naruto suddenly. "Saying you don't know what love is... I know you love tomatoes for sure!" He finished in a laugh, grinning at Sasuke through the gloom. Sasuke laughed too; his small, confident laugh that he always did, the note of superiority weaved into it as always. Back to normal. Thank goodness.

"How do you even know that?" he asked. Naruto closed his eyes and smiled and then opened his mouth and continued like the other boy hadn't spoken.

"It's ok if you're a lonely guy though. Because that means you're all mine. Mine to beat up and tease whenever I want. I don't have to share you with anyone."

Sasuke was silent again and Naruto lay still next to him with his eyes closed, a strange kind of warmth filling his chest after saying that.

_All mine..._ Sasuke was his, right? His rival, his best friend, his precious person. It was fine that he didn't want to share him with anyone else, because it was only natural to want to be closer, especially for Naruto. Sasuke was his very first bond. This warmth that he always felt when he was with Sasuke; even when they were fighting, it wasn't a lie. Without meaning to, he had reached out to the other boy a long time ago. Without meaning to, their hearts had grown closer together. They couldn't help it. More and more he wanted him and Sasuke to be like this. They barely ever fought over anything serious anymore and even though he was cold most of the time, Naruto knew better. Other people didn't know, but Sasuke could be gentle, in his own way. It was through lies and an annoyed face and sometimes he was pretty violent about it, but it was still gentleness.

Iruka sensei had once told him something about close team mates who had fought together being able to hear each others thoughts.

Ne, Sasuke, I wonder if you can hear me. Did you know that you're actually my absolute number one precious person?

Naruto waited. A dim light was creeping under the curtains, dawn was breaking. Sasuke's breath touched him again and Naruto watched him as his face lightened with the soft sunrays, life coming to his deep eyes making them smolder as he watched Naruto watching him.

"Want to eat?" asked Sasuke. Naruto laughed lightly.

"Yeah," he replied. I guess you didn't hear me, he thought as they climbed out of bed. But that's ok, because I don't think I really want you to know that yet...

…

Sasuke fingered the pocket on the front of the plain apron.

"Hurry up, Teme!" called Naruto who was sitting at table behind him. Sasuke scowled out at the window in front of him like it was the one yelling at him, rushing him. He sighed. His body felt heavy; like he needed to go back to bed. Unused to being awake earlier than the sun, the raven haired Uchiha was feeling drained. Lucky they didn't have training today and he had all day to recuperate before the festival.

He and Naruto were in the Uchiha house kitchen and after an argument over what to eat for breakfast; ramen versus actual food which resulted in Sasuke being slammed against the wall in the name of miso ramen and then Naruto being beaten. Sasuke had won and was cooking breakfast.

"An apron? What are you, a woman?" taunted Naruto from the where he was sitting cross legged on the chair closest. Sasuke snorted.

"Who are you calling a woman, you with your big blue eyes?" he retorted without turning to the boy. He tossed the food in the pan.

"What was that you bastard!"

All the gentle words from the bedroom were gone. The nature of their conversation made Sasuke feel light headed. He repositioned his fingers on the cooking chopsticks.

"_You're all mine..."_ What was with that? They had both said odd things. But none of the things said had been mean or hurtful. It had been strange but... nice, or some kind of feeling like that. He wondered what had come over him, and Naruto for that matter. Had they both just been tired, or had they got caught up in the soft atmosphere that seemed to arise lately when they were close to each other? Sasuke frowned.

"Foods ready." He pulled the pan off the stove and began to divide it into two portions. His own was bigger of course. Sasuke set the meal on the table and sat down opposite his blonde teammate.

"Itadakimasu?" said Naruto, staring at the food like he'd never seen a full, proper breakfast before.

"Baka," Sasuke muttered.

Naruto wolfed down his food after the first taste. Sasuke slowly ate his, his eyes lowered to his meal, watching Naruto through his eyelashes. The other boy was daydreaming, staring at the paper door that lead to the big garden out the front. Was it really ok to leave him as he was? The seal... just what was going on with it? Kakashi had taken Naruto to the hospital but Sasuke guessed no one there and probably no one in all of Konoha knew much about Naruto's seal. Why did the pain come and go? This morning Naruto was completely different to how he was last night. Last night he had been a wreck, crying and throwing himself at Sasuke, clutching him desperately.

The moment their bodies touched Sasuke had understood. Naruto's arms wrapped around him, his fingertips pressing hard against his side. He got it, he could feel it and that blue was no longer unknown. Naruto was scared; the feeling was probably just as overwhelming as the pain itself. Naturally, his heart had weakly yearned for the comfort of having someone near. Sasuke knew the feeling well, although he has never indulged it.

He remembered lifting them both, Naruto couldn't move, he just slumped against Sasuke, loosening his grip so that he could fall back. When Sasuke has put his hands on him the heat coming of the boy almost made him recoil. He was much hotter than last time. Sasuke had watched his eyes fall closed as his mouth opened into words that never that formed. Eventually he had cooled down, although it had taken much longer for the raging, unseen fire under his fingertips to disappear. Sasuke had then carefully rolled him over with a habitual, exasperated sigh and curled up next to him, covering them both with the comforter. Somehow, Naruto had ended up in his bed. Again.

But this morning the boy was fine, acting like it never happened. Sasuke watched him openly for a moment, lifting his eyes properly. Naruto's blue eyes were unfocused, his face sitting in his palm, leaning lazily on the table top. There was a small bruise from Sasuke's fist on his jaw. Dark eyes traced him slowly. He was wearing the same black t-shirt and orange pants that he had been when he had shown up last night, his forehead protector and bright jacket were missing. Sunbeams from through the window by the sink caught in his blonde hair, making it shine golden. Naruto was a bit breath taking, the air surrounding him while he was so calm was soft and gentle. Sasuke finished his last bite and was still watching Naruto's unguarded face when he turned to him, his mouth open to say something but no words ever came when he met his rivals gaze.

Neither said anything as Naruto's blue held Sasuke's black. Sasuke couldn't look away. He didn't even care that he had being caught staring. Naruto's expression was surprised; his eyes widened a little, cheeks slightly pink. His lips were parted. After a long moment Naruto blinked and Sasuke looked away, letting out his breath. There was silence between them but it lacked the awkwardness that should have hung heavily on it. Sasuke breathed in through his nose, trying to work out why it hadn't been strange. Why had staring at Naruto and being stared back at by him for an inappropriate length of time, felt so normal. It had been like that lately. At the inn in the bath, in bed and then last night and this morning. Every time their actions had been wrong, out of character, but right and expected at the same time. It made his head spin a little.

"I need a kimono for tonight," said Naruto, speaking up first. "Can I borrow one?" Sasuke closed his eyes and leaned back in his seat, frowning. Half opening his eyes, he gazed at his empty bowl, distracting himself with thoughts of the new subject. He needed one too; he hadn't had a new kimono since he was a kid...

"I don't have any, but you have money. Go buy one," Sasuke replied flatly, his indifferent mask sliding up over his features.

"Lets go buy them together ok Sasuke?" the blonde said. The raven looked up. Naruto was grinning stupidly, waiting for an answer like a child, like an idiot... The raven wondered for a second if Naruto had had the same stream of thoughts he had had a minute before. Or was he just unaffected by everything... The thought smacked Sasuke in the chest, he was breathless and he had to work hard to keep his face smooth. Am I the only one who is getting flustered over this? Naruto's eyebrows twitched.

"Later," replied Sasuke, turning his face away. Naruto sat back in his chair.

"When?"

"Later."

"Why?"  
"Because I said so."

Naruto pouted but they left it at that.

The two boys spent most of the morning at Sasuke's, lying on the veranda that ran all the way around the Uchiha house. Sasuke dozed in the sun; recuperating, but Naruto, who couldn't sit still, didn't stay on the veranda long, and even though he had had just about as much sleep as Sasuke, still seemed to have energy. The blonde boy took a long walk around the house, hunted through the fridge in vain searching for ice blocks, went looking for kimonos incase Sasuke had been lying and then sat next to the small pond in the garden watching the orange and black fish. Sasuke kept his eyes closed most of the time but sometimes opened them to watch Naruto's face. His unguarded expression while he was at the pond was fascinating. He sat back on his haunches with the tips of his fingers dipped into the pond, smiling happily and laughing softly when the fish came and sucked on his fingers. His behavior was completely different to the normal Naruto, but it wasn't unlike him either.

In between his little activities, Naruto would come back to the edge of the veranda and Sasuke would feel him watching him. The raven pretended to be asleep. At times, the blonde would stay for a while, sometimes silently creeping onto the veranda to lie next to Sasuke or sit by his side. Other times he would only stop for a short time and then leave again to amuse himself in some other way while he waited. He never said anything. Maybe because Sasuke was 'sleeping'.

The sun had moved so far it was almost overhead when Sasuke got up from the veranda. Naruto sighed and scowled at him for sleeping so long.

"Can we go now?" asked the blonde haired boy as the other came to stand next to him by the pond that Naruto had come back to for the third time. Sasuke didn't reply immediately. For a moment he just watched two fish; one dusty black and one brilliant orange, dance around each other. Their tails swished and Sasuke looked up and then turned.

"We can go now," he said, heading back inside.

…

Naruto walked behind Sasuke as they entered the heart of the village. It was bustling by this time and they had to push their way past a few people occasionally. The blonde boy smiled happily as he watched Sasuke's back, observing the way Sasuke's slim arms swung as he walked. Usually the boy wore shorts and walked with his hands in his pockets so Naruto had rarely seen him walk with his arms by his side. Today he wore light three quarter pants and a wide necked, navy shirt with the Uchiha crest on the back. His pale limbs made small, graceful swings; skimming his hip bone from time to time.

Naruto was wearing the Uchiha crest as well. After thoroughly hunting through Sasuke's wardrobe for something without the red and white fan because Sasuke didn't want him to wear it, and coming up empty handed, Sasuke had lent him a shirt with the smallest crest on it. Naruto fingered the print on the bottom corner of the shirt near his hip. The shirt was a bit too big; the seam that his shoulders should have extended to was a little uncomfortable against his arm and the hem at the bottom fell lower than it would have on Sasuke. Wearing Sasuke's clothes made Naruto's heart to a funny jump. Today they weren't ninja; neither was wearing his forehead protector. Today they weren't rivals. Today they were just two ordinary people. It was nice.

"Welcome!" called a woman from the far side of the room as they entered the shop. There were kimonos everywhere.

"Need a kimono for the festival?" she guessed, smiling gently at the two boys. Naruto smiled back. "Right this way." She directed them with a firm push.

Naruto stood self consciously waiting outside a curtained corner for Sasuke to finish trying on a kimono that the shop lady had picked out for him. He had never been in this shop before. Next to where he was standing, a boy was admiring himself in the mirror, turning this way and that to see the green kimono he was wearing from all angles.

"Going to the festival?" asked Naruto, smiling at the boy as he caught his eye.

"Yes!" replied the boy energetically, giving him the thumbs up and flashing him a wide smile. Naruto struggled to suppress a huge grin as he got a good look at the boy. His hair was cut evenly in a bowl cut and was a glossy black; his eyes were very round with thick eyelashes. Above the dark eyes were the thickest eyebrows the blonde had ever seen. He was a bit of a sight. Naruto wondered if he was a ninja too.

"I saw a very beautiful girl come in the gates from her mission the other day so I am hoping to see her there and win her heart!" continued the boy as he turned back and began preening himself.

"I see," said Naruto. The conversation didn't go any further than that because at that moment the curtain pulled away and Sasuke came out.

Naruto took a step back to get a good look at the Uchiha. In the navy blue, nearly black kimono Sasuke looked even taller. Naruto was a little awestruck. Suddenly there was something very different about Sasuke; the air around him had changed. Naruto whistled.

"That one suits you Teme," he said. Sasuke lifted his chin and smirked making Naruto's heart miss a beat. He looked so superior; like royalty, his pale skin glowing against the dark garment. It was impossible not to stare at him. Naruto decided that he had been wrong before. Sasuke was definitely most beautiful in a kimono. The boy's whiskered cheeks flushed slightly as he stared openly.

"Sasuke, you're kind of...I mean I..."

"Good, good!" called the shop lady, surprising both ninja as she bustled over with another kimono and pushing Naruto forward making him yelp.

"It seems like all you ninja are off missions because of the festival today so I have a lot of customers. Get your friend to help you with tying it; he seems to know what he's doing." She nodded at Sasuke. The curtain swept in front of him, cutting him off from Sasuke and Naruto stood helplessly with the orange kimono in his hands, not quite sure what to do.

…

Sasuke didn't talk to the green boy while he waited. He just stood feeling painfully nostalgic in a kimono. Distractedly, he ran his fingers through his dark hair. Naruto came out and Sasuke looked up.

"You really are a Dobe aren't you?" muttered Sasuke, his brows furrowing as Naruto stumbled around, half wearing the kimono. He smacked the Naruto on his blonde head and then proceeded to properly do up the kimono. When he was done he turned the boy around by his shoulders and gave him a long scrutinizing look.

"D-does it look good?" asked Naruto quietly, his eyes averted to the floor. Sasuke hesitated and then replied just as quietly.

"Y-yeah, it does.."

They paid and left the shop wearing the kimono because Sasuke refused to do Naruto's up again later.

"Let's stay at yours again tonight," called Naruto as he tripped in his newly purchased wooden geta.

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes!"

"Fine!" Naruto tripped into step with him and grinned up at him. Sasuke turned his face away. Naruto was actually stunning in the bright kimono. The colour set his blue eyes off, making them dance with hot blue flames. With his wild blonde hair and the orange of the material he was like a clumsy ball of sunshine, stumbling along by his side. Sasuke felt himself redden. They must look like a real pair walking together. One in deep blue and one in vibrant orange. The young Uchiha couldn't help but think of the two fish in his pond; dusty blue-black and brilliant bright orange.


	11. Chapter 11

_I think I am dead... Sooooo tired.. BUT! I finished! Who would have thought that this would end up being rather lengthy? I remember when I posted the first chapter asking whether I should continue. And now its so, O_O _

_Anyway, please enjoy! and R&R the review button is your friend. Click him. ^_^_

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It was time. Sakura was just about ready. Excitement bubbled inside her at the thought of going up to the training ground where the festival was being held. The New Year's festival. Last year, she had made a promise to herself that by the next festival she would be a ninja, a kunoichi. Going back there would mean she had fulfilled it. It was exciting. Her stomach fluttered. She had also stood in front of the shrine that was up a set of stairs from the training ground and prayed, asking for Sasuke. Her chest tightened.

In a way she had got that too. Sasuke was divided into a few pieces as far as ownership went. Naruto had the biggest piece, as his best friend, his rival, his most important person overall. And then Sakura liked to think that she had the next biggest piece; as his friend and team mate, maybe someone he wanted to protect.

The girl placed a final clip in her hair and took a last, long look in the mirror, curving her lips into a tiny, natural smile to check her expression still looked good with her hair tied up. The girl in the reflection was quite beautiful, dressed in a powdery, patterned, pink kimono with red cherry blossom print sprinkled on the shoulder and trailing over one side of her chest. At first she hadn't been sure about matching her pink hair with a similar coloured kimono, but once it was on she couldn't bear to take it off. Pink was kind of her colour anyway.

"Sakura! You'd better hurry up," called her mother from down the hallway.

"Ok!" she called back and hurried through the door and out into the warm, early evening light.

Sasuke and Naruto were waiting for her at the edge of the clearing. Sakura's feet slowed as her heartbeat picked up. Both boys were dazzling in their kimono. Sasuke in deep blue, his pale face turned to the sky with his arms folded inside his sleeves, and Naruto in striking orange, looking down toward the lines of stalls, standing awkwardly in his geta. Neither had seen her so she stood for a moment, just watching them. Naruto turned to Sasuke and the taller boy lowered his chin to look at the shorter one as he spoke. The blonde's smile was huge as he pointed at something. At that moment, Sakura's figure in the distance caught Naruto's eye. He stumbled forward and waved to her. She smiled and hurried forward, her heart soaring as they came into hearing distance and Naruto called her name and then Sasuke smirked a little.

"What should we do first?" asked Naruto, standing closely by her side. Sakura turned to him. Today he seemed younger than usual. Could it be his first time at something like this?

"We should go up to the shrine first," she told the boy and then looked to Sasuke. He agreed with a tiny nod.

"Alright! Let's go!" yelled Naruto. Sakura and Sasuke both shushed him as they started towards the stairs.

Sakura opened one eye as Naruto muttered under his breath something about Hokage and smiled. To her left, Sasuke stood in front of the shrine with his eyes closed. His lips moved silently as he prayed. I wonder what he's wishing for... thought Sakura, staring at his long eyelashes. The boy suddenly opened one eye and looked directly at her. A breath she had been holding hissed between her teeth as he scowled softly. That was a 'mind your own business and hurry up' in Sasuke language. Sakura quickly closed her eyes.

What to pray for...? For years she had always prayed for Sasuke. That wasn't really an option this year...

Got it! She pressed her palms harder together and pulled her eyebrows into a concentrated frown.

Please, O Kami sama, please help me to see clearly with unclouded eyes. Please help me to choose someone without being shallow. Please help my heart to be true.

Sakura opened her eyes and looked to Sasuke again, even though he had scolded her for it a second ago. Her determined frown faded into a sad smile.

You were always my number one... But it's impossible now, right? So thank you Sasuke kun, for my first love and know that I'm trying my best to move on from this moment on ok…?

Sasuke's eyelashes fluttered in silent response.

"All done! What did you pray for Sakura chan?" said Naruto, clapping his hands together. Sakura blinked.

"Um.. clear skin," she smiled. Naruto laughed. "Like that's a problem for you."

Back in the heart of the festival, Sakura spotted Ino immediately. She frowned across the space and Ino frowned back before motioning her over with a smile. To get her away from Sasuke? Or to be friendly? Because sometimes Ino could be close to friendly. Sakura considered her. The blonde haired girl was standing with Shikamaru and Chouji, along with Hyuuga Hinata and her team. Sakura was reluctant to leave her boys' side but the other girl was getting impatient.

"Sakura! Come here!" Ino yelled.

The pink haired girl touched Naruto shoulder

"I'm going over here for a bit ok?" she said. He turned to her and grinned.

"Ok, we're going to go play that game!" replied Naruto excitably, pointing at the kingyo sukui game. Sakura smiled as Naruto hurried off, dragging Sasuke by his sleeve.

"Oi! Forehead!" called Ino.

"Coming!" yelled Sakura.

Ino linked her arm through Sakura's, meeting the pink haired girl as she approached the group.

"Let's not do any of that rival stuff today ok?" said Ino in a low voice as she pulled her over to the others. Sakura glanced at her doubtfully out of the corner of her eye and Ino sighed, knowing Sakura didn't believe her.

"Ok, actually, it's because you're the only girl who'll actually talk around here," said the slightly taller girl, rolling her eyes in Hinata's direction. Sakura turned her eyes to the Hyuuga heiress who was standing between her two male team mates, Inuzuka Kiba and Aburame Shino. Hinata was cute but very shy. She looked more nervous than usual; kind of shrinking into Kiba's side with one hand curled in a tight fist at her chest and the other hanging by her side, her fingers quivering like she wanted to reach up and grab Shino's hand. Sakura could see a conversation between someone like Ino and someone like Hinata being rather awkward.

"Hi Hinata," said Sakura politely, approaching Team 8 and smiling reassuringly at the girl. Hinata jumped and smiled back timidly in greeting, apparently too unsure to say anything. Her unusual eyes skittered nervously.

"What's wrong with you Hinata?" said Kiba softly and Hinata peeled her gaze off Sakura to look up at him.

"I- um- nothing..." she replied, throwing a frightened glance over her shoulder. Sakura, Kiba and Shino all looked behind them and Hinata hung her head.

At the stall opposite them stood three people; two boys and a girl. The tallest boy was glaring straight at them, his light lavender eyes boring deep holes in the back of Hinata's head. Sakura felt Shino tense and Kiba growled quietly.

"Who is that, Hinata?" asked Kiba, his voice rough and hard.

"N-No one Kiba kun, its nothing," replied Hinata. She sounded like she was about to cry.

"Hinata..." said Kiba warningly and Shino put a hand on her shoulder.

The group began to approach, led by a boy in a green kimono with black hair. Sakura felt a giggle bubble behind her lips as the leader walked determinedly forward, his hands fists by his side. He was quite possibly the strangest looking boy she had ever seen. He was tall and lanky; the kimono didn't suit him very well. His face was set in a frown; his round eyes were bright and caught the light of the lanterns strung overhead that a man was bringing to life as the sun went down. Sakura flicked her gaze to the other two members.

The glaring boy was actually pretty good looking with delicate pale skin and a face that was slightly sharper than most of the boys around. Even as he walked, he stared at Hinata, who was half turned to them, partially hidden behind a serious Kiba who was standing firmly in front, tall and protective. The girl in the back of the trio's expression was light and she smiled apologetically, trying to level out the hostility and seriousness of her team mates attitudes. They stopped in front of the group of younger kids and Sakura felt Ino come to stand next to her followed by the rest of her team. Regroup, safety in numbers, it was a natural ninja instinct.

"My name," said the green boy loudly, stepping forward and speaking directly to Sakura, "is Rock Lee! And..." His face flushed a bright pink and he bowed lowly to her, his shiny, mop-top hair falling forward. "I love you!"

"Wa..?" said Sakura, her head going completely blank. The green boy, Rock Lee straightened to his full height and took a small step towards her. Sakura lifted her chin a little to look at him.

"I love you, Sakura san," he said, smiling at her gently. Sakura's mouth twitched as she tried to decide what kind of face she should make right now.

How did he know her name...? She was sure they hadn't met before. What was with this confession from a complete stranger? Her green eyes travelled the length of him. He had a full head over her; tall and slim with long limbs. His face was so strange though and the way he moved and spoke, it was honest like he wasn't hiding anything. The boy had a certain feel to him. Trusting and truthful. Sakura felt herself blush despite herself under his intense gaze when she reached his dark eyes. He loved her? Her stomach twisted with shapeless, nameless emotions. What on earth was she supposed to say to that? How sudden.

At that moment, the female member of the trio stepped forward and smacked Rock Lee on the upside of his head. He stumbled back a few large steps and threw her a confused look.

"Lee, what are you doing? Confessing like that! She doesn't even know you!" the girl scolded and Lee's head dropped down, his round eyes falling away, looking to his feet. He looked a bit like a puppy dog. Sakura smiled and couldn't help but laugh a little at his expression. Lee looked up at the noise and gave her a large grin and the thumbs up, earning him another smack on the head.

The girl from the smaller group turned, and smiled at Sakura. She was older, they all were. She was a little taller than Sakura, shorter than her male team mates and had chocolate eyes and light brown hair, pulled into two tight buns on either side of her head.

"Sorry, I'm Tenten; we're ninja, a year above you guys. Team Gai; me, Lee and Neji. Nice to meet you," she said.

"You too, I'm Haruno Sakura," replied Sakura, a little timid.

"Did he freak you out?" asked Tenten gently, like she was speaking to a child. Sakura frowned a little, unsure whether she liked that.

"Apparently he's taken a liking to you." Tenten laughed, carrying on the exchange between them as both she and Sakura turned to the topic of the conversation, stepping away from the big group. Kiba broke off from the group too and approached the boy named Neji. Hinata hid behind Shino. Sakura suddenly felt alone as she left the safety of Ino and the others.

"Lee is a bit naive and just jumps into whatever he's committed himself to, but he's loyal and hard working and a good friend of mine," said Tenten next to her and Sakura watched as Lee joined the one sided conversation Kiba was trying to have with Neji. The Inuzuka boy didn't look happy and Neji appeared to be ignoring him.

"He says he loves you so he is probably really serious about it... I want to ask something of you, Sakura san," said Tenten quietly.

"What is it?" replied Sakura, her voice higher than normal, startled by her name being popped into the sentence so familiarly. Tenten took a few steps towards her team mates and then turned to the younger, pink haired girl and smiled.

"Give him a chance."

With that and a friendly wink in Sakura's direction, she moved off with her two boys, tugging Lee roughly by his green kimono sleeve.

Behind Sakura, the other six had regrouped. Kiba's growl rose above the other chatter, rough and aggravated. Sakura stood where Tenten had left her, staring after the small group until she heard Naruto's loud voice calling for her.

"Sakura chan! Sakura chaaaan!" She blinked and started towards him, not bothering to say goodbye, as he waved her over to where he and Sasuke were crouched in front of the goldfish catching, Kingyo Sukui stall. She took one last look at Tenten's departing group.

_Please help me to choose someone without being shallow. Please help my heart to be true._

The girl smiled and shook her head.

"Rock Lee huh.."

…

Naruto crouched back down next to Sasuke, balancing himself carefully on his geta and smoothing his new kimono while they waited for Sakura. He could hear the click of her wooden shoes as she hurried over.

Kingyo Sukui was probably the most frustrating thing ever. All you had to do was catch the little goldfish and get them in your bowl, but the net was made of thin paper and always broke before you could get one. Naruto had sat for ages trying to catch just one fish while Sasuke stood leaning against the side of the stall.

After a while, the Uchiha boy had looked over. Naruto heard him laugh quietly at the blonde's frustration. Looking up, Naruto found Sasuke lowering himself onto his knees and picking up a net.

"You can't catch one, Dobe?" he had asked, his manner unusually gentle as he carefully hovered over a fish. Naruto watched him with wide eyes as Sasuke's face grew quiet, all emotion dropping from it. Concentration. Light from the lanterns had danced softly across the boy's pale skin. He had looked so beautiful in that moment. And then the net had broken. Neither boy could catch one of the bright glimmers of orange.

Sakura floated down next to them, easily sliding into a delicate crouching position. She was a flower in her pink kimono, a true cherry blossom with her hair tied high and her eyes a softer shade of green under the lights.

"Can you catch us a fish Sakura chan? Teme is too unskilled to get one," said Naruto, jerking a thumb at Sasuke. In response, Sasuke bought his fist down on the blonde boys head. He was quicker to snap after failing to catch a fish. Naruto rubbed his head as Sakura handed over a few coins and brought the paper net to the water.

Naruto watched her intently and could feel Sasuke doing the same. There was something very entrancing about watching a girl playing the game. Sakura's fingers looked different to his or Sasuke's on the net. She held it gently rather than gripping it anxiously. Faster than Naruto's unready eyes could track, Sakura flicked her wrist and suddenly, right there in her little silver bowl was a tiny fish, swimming frantically.

"That's amazing Sakura chan! You're really good at this!" cried Naruto, jumping up and reaching after the fish as Sakura handed the bowl over the counter for the man to put in a bag.

"Can I have it? Can I?" asked Naruto excitedly. Sakura laughed and plopped the bag into his awaiting hands. It was like jelly in his palm. It jiggled as the water rolled up the sides of the plastic, refusing to sit still, making the fish toss and tumble clumsily. Naruto made a small noise of delight and then looked up to thank Sakura but was stopped when his blue-fire eyes reached his team mates faces. Both were watching him with a strange fondness in their faces. Sakura was smiling gently at him; Sasuke lips were lifted the tiniest bit. Neither seemed to realize that he had looked up. They looked taller than normal.

"What?"

"Nothing, Naruto," said Sakura. "Nothing."

…

At the far edge of the training ground the grass was longer; hip height. They stood in a line; blue, pink, orange. The now dark sky exploded into colour, each burst making the breath in Sakura's chest catch and release slowly. The fireworks were dazzling and almost every person at the festival had gathered to watch them.

"Ne, Sakura chan." The girl turned as the boy on her right called her softly.

"Yeah?" Naruto didn't look away from the sky. A blue and pink explosion lit up his eyes.

"Did you do everything you wanted to this year?" he asked. Sakura paused.

"No," she told him honestly, chancing a glance at the boy to her left. Sasuke didn't look.

"Oh," said Naruto. "I did everything I wanted to do. I wanted to become a ninja. I wanted to eat a lot of ramen. I wanted to go on cool missions. I wanted... to make some good friends. I think I did all of them." Finally he turned his face to her and grinned. Naruto was close and she noticed that he had grown, his gaze much closer to hers all of a sudden. He was taller and stronger but he was still the mostly the same; hyper active, loud, easily excited, childish. He would always be that goofy kid. Always the baby of their family. And Sakura and Sasuke would always have their places too. Everyone in their team had a set place, a set role. That would never change, no matter what.

Slowly, Sakura reached out and pulled Naruto's hand from his side. He stared at her, amazed by the contact. She smiled as her other hand came out slowly. She pressed her fingertips to the inside of Sasuke's warm palm. He jumped but when he saw she was joining them all he opened his fingers and allowed her to hold his hand. His face was flushed and he looked angrily embarrassed.

Sasuke's hand was folded carefully in hers. Naruto's was warm and friendly and fitted neatly. Sakura's heart swelled with warmth.

"Sasuke kun, Naruto... Please look after me again this year..."

She stayed a little longer in the long grass, holding their hands before; with a smile she let them go and stepped back. They looked over their shoulders and she flashed them another reassuring smile.

"See you later," she said. "Happy New Year."

Enjoy this moment, she thought as she retreated out of the long grass.

…

Sakura stood next to the Kingyo Sukui stall, watching the flickering fish. Ino appeared by her side.

"Sasuke loves Naruto. I thought you should know," the pink haired girl said quietly. She felt the other's surprise and they stood in silence for a long moment while Ino overcame the shock.

"Aren't you upset?" asked Sakura, her eyes following one particular fish and then swapping to a new one when two fish crossed paths. There was a silence.

"Sasuke has been out of reach for a long time. I'm shocked, I mean him and _Naruto_? But I kind of always knew it would never be me... It was fun chasing him though..." said Ino

"Yeah..." murmured Sakura. Ino moved closer to her. The atmosphere between them softened.

"What are you gonna do Forehead? Me and you aren't the same, you have to see them everyday." Sakura sighed painfully, her chest growing tight again. She reached up to finger her long bangs that were left loose to frame her face.

"Maybe I'll cut my hair..." she said to herself. Ino tensed. Both of them had grown their hair long for Sasuke. Sakura lifted her chin. "Or maybe... I'll give someone else a chance to with my heart."

…

Sasuke yelped loudly as Naruto wrapped an arm around his neck and fell backwards, pulling them both down. The world disappeared behind the high grass and now it was just him and Sasuke under the fireworks.

"What do you think you're doing? Usuratonkachi!" yelled Sasuke as he sat up angrily. Even sitting up they were hidden by the long grass. Naruto tugged on Sasuke's sleeve, closing his eyes and breathing in the safe scent of the warm ground.

"Let's sleep here tonight Teme," he said softly. Sasuke bristled.

"Sleep here by yourself. I'm not staying." He tried to stand but Naruto kept a firm grip on his sleeve and pulled him back down on the ground to lie next to him. This time Sasuke didn't try to get back up.

A few stalks of grass formed a thin wall between them. Naruto watched Sasuke through it, unseen. Sasuke was watching the fireworks again. His arm was lying on top of Naruto's; in the same place it had fallen when Sasuke was drawn back into their hideaway. A light fluttering started in Naruto's stomach as his eyes gazed steadily, staring at nothing in particular, just Sasuke. His face heated and his breathing ceased as a thought struck him. Was he enjoying Sasuke's company too much? Was that wrong? He blinked slowly, his body so heavy and comfortable, his eyes so mesmerized by Sasuke. Did he like Sasuke more than he should? He blinked again.

If Sasuke went off with someone else... If Sasuke smiled at someone else... If Sasuke said 'Dobe' or 'Usuratonkachi' to someone else... If Sasuke slept next to someone else... If Sasuke breathed his sweet breath on someone else... If Sasuke let someone else get close... someone who wasn't Naruto...

None of that sounded right...

Without thinking at all, Naruto moved his thumb and stroked the inside of Sasuke's wrist. The skin there was soft and hairless. Sasuke turned to look at him, his eyes brimming with the light of the fireworks overhead.

Are we... more than friends...?


	12. Chapter 12

_Lordy Lou... This took me forever... My shoulder are dead from slaving over the computer for so long because I decided I'd better update this thing already! ^_^ Hope you like it!_

_Enjoy_

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Sasuke walked in front, his head bowed, allowing his dark bangs to cover his handsome face. The other's footsteps were slow behind him as they walked. Sasuke couldn't decide whether it was awkward or not.

Naruto's face in that moment when he had touched the inside of Sasuke's wrist with his thumb, stoking gently. His eyes had held something different. A new emotion yet again. Another one Sasuke had never seen before. He had stared back, saying nothing, allowing the boy to touch his pulse that had jumped and then evened out. They watched each other and Sasuke dove into Naruto's blue eyes, searching for the thoughts crossing his mind, for the meaning behind his expression. Neither boy said anything for what felt like the longest time. And then, a firework burst out across the sky. The noise startled them both and it was over. Naruto's eyes and thumb moved away from Sasuke and neither had said anything more than "Let's go now."

The two were now crossing through a training ground, taking a short cut on the way home. Sasuke walked in front, Naruto in the back. The raven haired boy was cold; the muscles between his shoulder blades were tight. Anxious.

Was he supposed to just erase that moment from his memories? How could he forget that look? Could Naruto also carry on like nothing had happened? Surely something like that, a moment so tender and soothing, couldn't be forgotten so easily. Or was the other boy still just unaffected by everything? What should I do... thought Sasuke as the canopy of trees thinned and gave way to the night sky, now an inky black, vast and unknown in the absence of the bright fireworks.

"Sasuke! Wait! Look up there! The stars!" Naruto's loud voice broke the silence. Sasuke didn't stop walking. They were only stars. He didn't want to look. He wanted to go home and sleep. He wanted to escape.

"Sasuke!" Suddenly Naruto's hand was pulling his, jerking him backwards and to the blonde's side. Sasuke looked up. A light feeling filled him. The night sky was littered with tiny pin pricks, glowing and twinkling mysteriously. Time stopped as they stood under the stars, both boys losing themselves for a while. The tension in Sasuke's shoulders lessened. It was nicer than he had expected.

"Ne, Sasuke. What do you think they are?" asked Naruto quietly. Sasuke could imagine the look on his face. He would be smiling, childish enchantment lighting his eyes, everything but the stars forgotten. Naruto was like that. Only able to focus on one thing at a time. Like a little kid. It was annoying.

"Burning balls of gas," replied Sasuke. Naruto pouted next to him.

"That's not a very cool answer Teme," he said. Sasuke sighed. More out of habit though because, to Sasuke's relief, the situation felt fine. It wasn't awkward; Naruto was even calling him 'Teme'.

Maybe they could be fine. Maybe it was fine to touch each other like that for no reason. Naruto was bound to be a physical person after the kind of childhood he had had; no one to cuddle with when he was young and needed it the most. Sasuke was silent, another answer pushing at the seam of his lips.

"My mother said once that they were the spirits of people who are gone now. That they are up there to watch over us," Sasuke said finally. He laughed a little. "I guess I have a few up there huh?" Naruto's grip on his hand tightened and Sasuke realized they were still holding hands. He felt Naruto's eyes on him. Sasuke kept his face lifted to the stars. Neither said anything for a while.

"Sasuke... Does it hurt?" Naruto asked. Instinctively, walls came up around Sasuke's heart, his expression becoming hard and guarded.

"No."

"Is it terrible, Sasuke?" Naruto asked, ignoring his answer. Sasuke frowned gently.

Terrible? Being alone all the time? Yes.

Does it hurt? Yes.

What a stupid question... Shouldn't you know...? Know how it's unbearable. How I hate it. How I'm scared. How I want to scream... But what's the point? No one will hear me, there's no one to rescue me when it gets dark anymore. I'm all alone.

Terrible? Yes.

He lowered his dark haired head, breathing shakily.

"I'm fine," replied Sasuke. Naruto's fingers grew hot and the boy was quiet. Let that be the end of it, thought the Uchiha. I don't want to talk anymore. Again silence.

"You know..." said the blonde slowly, considering his words. "If you're lonely Sasuke say you're lonely." Sasuke's eyes widened a little.

"If it hurts you should say so... You should say and do what ever you want... You don't have to stay quiet you know"

Sasuke turned to Naruto and he did the same. They stood, watching each other again, only a breath away, their steady breathing moving together. In and out. In and out. Sasuke's heartbeat began to pound in his chest. Could Naruto hear it? He blew a soft breath through his barely parted lips and the shorter boy closed his eyes against its touch. Naruto's eyelashes were light, nearly blonde. Sasuke blinked twice slowly and then didn't open his eyes again. It was as if their closeness was gently holding his eyelids shut, making them heavy. He could hear the whoosh of air as they breathed, so close, so close. The ground beneath them disappeared and Sasuke felt dizzy. His mind was slow, unable to register what was happening, his body just moved on its own as he tilted his head, leaning down, into the other boy.

All at once, Sasuke's lips brushed the very surface of Naruto's and blue lightning shot through him making his eyelids snap back and both boys jump away and yelp. Sasuke panted, clutching the front of his kimono as his mind whizzed through the past few seconds, finally catching up. Heat flew into his face. It was like drowning.

"Wha- What was that?" yelled Naruto, his fingers half covering his mouth, his eyes wide and shocked.

"I could ask you the same thing," Sasuke yelled back. They were standing several strides apart now. Neither boy answered. Sasuke's cheeks burned in anger or embarrassment. Naruto kept his hands at his mouth. They avoided each other's gaze.

Sasuke spoke first once he was sure his voice wouldn't tremble.

"We both reacted weirdly so lets both take some blame and forget about it, Ok?" said the raven, putting on his mature face. The blonde's eyes were wide and he didn't try to hide his feelings at all.

Some one had to be the adult...

Naruto nodded in silent agreement, his face darkened by the night time shadow of the trees he had retreated back into.

"Let's go."

The rest of the trip back to the big Uchiha house at the end of the road was very quiet.

…

Slowly, the material slipped from his shoulders and dropped to the floor with a soft thud and pooled; vivid orange at his bare feet. Naruto was alone in the room, standing stripped to his boxers. He touched his bare chest, his cool fingers spreading chills across his skin as he tried to feel for his heartbeat, trying to gather his thoughts but it was like trying to grab water with only you're hands.

Nearly kissing another boy... Nearly kissing Sasuke! How did that even happen?

Naruto gathered up his kimono and piled it delicately on a chair in the corner before reaching for a shirt and climbing onto the end of Sasuke's bed to wait.

Sasuke had been in the shower for and hour now. Maybe he had drowned. Naruto furrowed his eyebrows. The serious frown felt strange on his features. Heavy. But he couldn't work out how he was feeling.

_Are we... more than friends...? _

He had thought that as they lay in the grass together. And then, under the stars, Sasuke's hand in his… It had changed from warm to cold when he asked if Sasuke was hurting and Naruto suddenly felt it through their contact, all of Sasuke's feelings that he refused to show on his face. All Naruto had wanted right then was to hold him even tighter, to warm the other boy's body. When they had stood so close Sasuke had breathed on him, pushing everything from his mind. Nothing else mattered but the heat from Sasuke's body so close to his. The desire to touch the other boy had completely consumed him. With his hands wasn't enough, their hands pressing together wasn't enough...

The feelings he had towards Sasuke... He had realized in the grass that they weren't normal. But could it really be possible? Sasuke was his rival. He hated him, right? But at the same time, he always wanted to be closer to Sasuke. It had always been that way. He had always wanted to catch him but he was always so far ahead. It wasn't even about surpassing him. No. All Naruto really wanted, was to walk beside him. He'd been over this before; wanting to be closer. But never in this light... What was he supposed to do...?

The door opened. Naruto looked up. Sasuke was standing in the door way, dressed for bed, his unruly hair falling a little more flat than usual. Silently, he walked to the bedside and carefully climbed up near the pillow.

"So..." said Naruto, shuffling around to face him. They sat at opposite ends. Sasuke said nothing but as their eyes skimmed each other, a dusty red crept over Sasuke's nose. It looked strangely endearing on him. Naruto gulped. The Uchiha's damp black hair shone in the light of the single light bulb above them. Sasuke picked at the hem of his duvet.

"So..." he replied back, still not looking up.

Silence.

What was Sasuke thinking? Why was he red? Was he angry? His face was frowning but the centre of his forehead where his thin black eyebrows pulled together trembled a little; not like when he was angry. Naruto knew angry all too well.

"Sasuke... I..." He looked to the other boy weakly for help with the conversation. Naruto didn't know what to say but they couldn't just leave it. Sasuke didn't move from where he sat, folded delicately near the head of the bed. He didn't turn his face to Naruto. His pale hand sitting on his thigh was clenched. Eventually Naruto looked away too. The nearly kiss was clearly playing on both their minds.

"I'm sorry."

Naruto jumped.

"W-what?" He said, lifting his startled blue eyes.

"Sorry," said Sasuke again, his lips pushed out in a pout, his averted dark eyes glaring across room.

Naruto's eyes widened. Sasuke's apology didn't sit right in his chest. It was heavy and shifted as he breathed. Something had to be said. But this wasn't it. Sorry definitely wasn't the right thing to say.

"I'm sorry..."

_Sorry isn't right. Stop it. Somehow I can't take you saying it... _Sorry was rejection.

"...It was mostly my fault..."

_Don't say sorry. You don't mean it, I can tell..._

Naruto's body tensed and un-tensed. He dug his fingers into the blankets.

"...I said some weird things..."

_Don't say it. Shut your mouth. I don't want to hear you regret it..._

On its own accord, Naruto's body moved forward.

"...and I just wanted to say that-" Sasuke never finished his sentence. His mouth stopped as Naruto threw himself at him. They fell again, for the second time on that bed. Sasuke smacked his head against the wall.

"Dobe... What are you doing? I'm trying to get rid of all of this..." said one to the other as they lay awkwardly, half propped up, the smaller boy with his blonde head buried in the other's chest.

"No," came the muffled reply and Sasuke lifted a fisted hand up and dropped it gently onto the Naruto's head in a half hearted protest.

"What the hell does 'no' mean? You don't want this to go away?" asked Sasuke.

"..."Naruto tightened his grip, pushing his nose further into Sasuke. What should he say?

He could feel Sasuke waiting.

"...Maybe..." Naruto's lips moved against Sasuke's skin through the thin material of his shirt making him shiver.

"What does 'maybe' mean?" asked Sasuke, no taunt in his voice, only quiet curiosity.

"Maybe means maybe! Jerk!" Naruto lifted his face, his eyes blazing for a moment and then settled as he came to terms with how close they were. Sasuke's eyes were dark and still. A hand was in Naruto's hair, slipped from its fisted position atop his head, now pressing gently. The heat from Sasuke's palm seeped over his head like warm water. Naruto flushed and his eyes jumped nervously to the side; away from the other boy's face.

"Let me go..." muttered Naruto softly; realizing Sasuke's other arm had somehow found its way around his body. He could feel the Uchiha watching him, considering him silently.

"_Maybe means maybe!"_

What did maybe really mean?

"You should too..."

Naruto looked up as the words left Sasuke's mouth. He was unsure whether he had heard them or felt them brush his skin. They were close; their mouths hovering close to each other. Sasuke was looking right at him. Naruto was scared to breathe.

"I should just do whatever I want, you said..." The dark haired boy's face became embarrassedly angry, his eyes flicking to the side, just as Naruto's had before and this time it was the blonde who kept watching. "You should do the same... Just do whatever you want."

"Sa...suke...?"

They breathed, slightly out of sync, one a little behind the other. Naruto couldn't tell whose was slower. Sasuke's scent... or his... smelt strange. Bitter sweet. What was it? Whose was it? It was impossible to know, they were one. He was dizzy and his breath hitched as Sasuke's nose nudged his. His eyes were closing; his heart beat quick and loud as they came closer and closer.

They touched and a white shock shot through Naruto's body and pooled, hot and burning between his hips. Everything else was gone apart from the feeling of Sasuke's soft lips against him. They parted for a moment and Sasuke sat up straighter.

"Is this really ok?" asked Naruto and Sasuke nodded; no words, just a hurried motion, his eyes dark and half lidded as he brought his hands back to Naruto's face, pulling him back again.

"Sasuke..." whispered Naruto breathlessly; his face flush, making his head spin. He was so vulnerable, so open, so completely unable to think. It was embarrassing. How could his head be so empty, his body so hot?

"Sasuke.. Stop... I can't-" His words were cut off as Sasuke's lips crashed into his again.

"I don't care... if how I feel... is right... or wrong...anymore," said Sasuke in quick, short breaths in between kisses. Naruto's body reacted with the sound of Sasuke's velvet voice and he let out a tiny noise that made his white shock pool stir. Sasuke leant back down and Naruto couldn't help but lift his face to him.

The other boy's face was only visible in flashes; eyes closed. His breath short and laboured as they exchanged kisses. Some slow and long, others short. Somehow Naruto was on his back now and Sasuke's lips were moving quicker, clumsy and hot against his own that were just as needy. His hands were moving on Sasuke's back, in his hair, on his face, grasping desperately, unsure whether he was willing him to stop or keep going.

It was too much. It was only his first time doing this, only Sasuke's first time doing this, only _their_ first time doing this!

Sasuke's knee moved his knee between Naruto's legs and the blonde gasped against the other boy's lips. Suddenly, Sasuke's tongue was in his mouth. Naruto made a noise of protest, the slick texture of Sasuke's tongue throwing him.

Too much! Too much!

Crossing an arm over his body, Naruto flung it out and his fist caught Sasuke squarely in the jaw. The boy was sent flying off the bed. All ninja ability escaping him, he landed heavily on the ground. Naruto scrambled into a sitting position and pulled his shirt down hurriedly, trying to regain some composure. He vaguely remembered Sasuke's busy hands there too.

"T-Teme! What the hell do you think you were doing?" protested Naruto shakily, wiping his messy mouth. Sasuke was on his hands and knees, his eyes wide open.

"S-sorry, I couldn't.. stop," he replied, his voice jumping all over the place. Sasuke's fingers trembled as he raised his hand to wipe his own mouth. Naruto blinked, and he grinned a little, momentarily forgetting what had just happened.

"Control issues, Teme?" he taunted.

"Shut up!" yelled Sasuke, getting to his feet and climbing back onto the bed. His face was red.

Sasuke who was precise and accurate, who never missed a target with his steady mind and hand... Control issues.. If Naruto wasn't so shaken up he would have teased him a bit more.

"You're the one who did it first," Sasuke growled.

"You're the one who told me too!" cried Naruto!

"Whatever! It's not my fault you can't handle it!"  
"Handle it? You nearly tried to eat me!"

"I did not!"

"Did too! You Jerk! Putting your tongue in my mouth like that! It's too much!"

"I hate you!"

"I hate you more!"

They were both panting, standing on the bed, childish frowns set firmly on their features, bristling with anger, faces red with fury or the topic.

Naruto clenched his teeth, his eyelids burned when he blinked. An annoying itching sensation started in the corners of his eyes.

"You haven't even said how you feel yet!" he cried, closing his eyes as the words flew from his lips. He bunched his fists against the silence that followed. The itching got worse. He was going to cry, the sobs began to bubble in his chest. He heard Sasuke blow out a breath that was going to be used for his next retort. One tear escaped and Naruto dashed it away angrily.

"I mean! It just snuck up on me so quickly and all off a sudden I realized I actually really like you! A lot!" More tears were falling even though Naruto's eyes were closed. The words were just falling from his lips without thought. They sounded stupid, muddled, weak. But it didn't stop them, or make them less true.

"And then I was thinking that... I've probably loved you for a long time now..." His voice was losing its strength, drowning as he swallowed tears. "All the time I'm thinking that if it's not me by your side..." He couldn't finish. Built up tears spilt, some clear with this fresh pain of uncertainty, some cloudy with time, held back, bottled, never shed. Naruto's shoulders rose around his ears. Crying in front of Sasuke was the absolute worst.

"Baka," said Sasuke. Naruto opened his eyes. The figure before him was blurry with tears. He hiccupped.

"Didn't I say I don't care whether what I'm feeling is right or wrong or something?" continued the dark haired boy. His voice was nearly steady but a soft red touched his face as he said it. Naruto frowned slowly.

"What you were feeling... Could mean anything..." Blue eyes pulled away, looking to the floor that was a long way down from where they were standing.

"Desire... right?" asked Naruto, identifying the bitter sweet scent between them earlier. His legs gave out when his minds eye replayed Sasuke's expression. The Uchiha followed him down and sat an arms space away. The scent was everywhere, thickening the air around them. Naruto closed and reopened his eyes in a slow blink, gathering his thoughts.

"It means nothing... It's not the same as the feeling that was behind what I was doing..." said Naruto. He couldn't look at Sasuke. In a different part of his mind he frowned at his insecurity.

"Baka," said Sasuke again. Naruto's skin bristled with anger at the insult but when he looked back to Sasuke, lifting his chin to yell, the other boy was coming for him. In one swift movement Sasuke's pale fingers grabbed him at the elbow and pulled him forward into his arms. Naruto's heart thundered in his chest.

"Teme?"

"Dobe..." The name came easily but the next words didn't.

"I love you," whispered Sasuke into the downy blonde hair behind Naruto's ear. His velvet voice was choked like the words were hard to say. The blonde closed his eyes. The words flooded through him. You were supposed to be happy when someone said that to you, excited so that you couldn't sleep, but Sasuke's words made Naruto happy-drowsy. Fighting had taken it out of him and Sasuke had sounded so sincere. It made him feel safe in the other boy's arms, like he could fall to sleep right now and not worry. Even though it sounded hard for Sasuke.

Actually, it probably was hard for Sasuke… He had loved before and it had all been ripped away. He must be scared. Naruto wrapped his arms around Sasuke's back and pushed his lips into the boy's tense shoulder. They stayed that way for a while, and then Sasuke's arms loosened and Naruto slid down a little. Worn out. What time was it? Late?

"Are you taking over my bed again?" asked Sasuke, a tiny smirk in his voice. Naruto frowned sleepily with his eyes closed and crawled away and under the comforter. Sasuke sighed and got in next to him. Back to back. Naruto didn't like it. He rolled over and nudged Sasuke lightly with all the strength he could muster. He turned over and Naruto moved closer to his warmth.

"You're all clingy all of a sudden. It freaks me out," muttered Sasuke bluntly. Every wall Naruto had gone down. Every piece of defiance he had in him disappeared when he was tired, when Sasuke breathed on him. The blonde didn't respond or move.

Very slowly, Sasuke's arms came around his body. Naruto smiled.

"I'll never tell," promised Naruto gently, the words slipping out, flying straight past his lowered walls. Sasuke tensed in embarrassment.

"Let's have pancakes for breakfast..." said Naruto after a moment. He was just about to lose himself to sleep. Sasuke laughed quietly.

"Mmmm, with banana and chocolate chips," he said, his voice vibrating through them both. Naruto frowned gently.

"That's just weird Teme," he said.

"... Whatever, Usuratonkachi..."


	13. Chapter 13

_Chapter 13! yeees! Anyone else excited? I'm not. I don't like this chapter very much but whatever ^_^  
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_Enjoy (if you can O_O)_

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Sasuke dreamt of Naruto that night. Three times.

He and Naruto were standing in a field of long grass. Naruto was grinning up at him, his eyes closed and his blonde fringe moving gently in the warm breeze. They were both holding piles of soft purple flowers, freshly picked.

"She'll love them! Let's go Teme!" called Naruto, taking a happy step into the lead. Half of his body lost to the grass, long and yellow in the gentle afternoon light. Sasuke's heart swelled with lost affection that hadn't filled him in so long. As he took a step forward the rest of the dream began to fall away. Naruto's face had looked back to him in that moment but his expression and features were erased by the bright light of the sun.

In the next one, he and Naruto were standing on Team 7's bridge. Orange and red leaves littered the wood beneath their feet. They were waiting for something but neither could remember what. An uneasy feeling hung in the air. It looked like it was going to rain. Naruto gazed out over the grey water that was running below. All of a sudden, the scene turned black and white and the blonde begun to cry. His face was still and calm but tears were running over his cheeks uncontrollably. Naruto didn't seem to notice and he wouldn't look away from the water even as Sasuke grabbed him and shook his shoulder, calling for him.

In the last one it was foggy and Sasuke couldn't see his hands when he reached them out in front of him. In his fingers was a thick piece of material with a spiral printed on it, like the one on the shoulder of Naruto's orange jacket. He gripped it tightly and opened his mouth to yell for someone. As he stepped further into the fog, a huge gust of cold air hit him between the shoulders. The spiral flew from his fingers and Sasuke cried out.

For some reason it was insanely important for him to keep hold of that ragged scrap of material. Sasuke jumped after it. As his heels lifted of the ground in a leap, he sensed movement behind him. His fingers brushed the spiral as it fell, his head turned to look over his shoulder. It was an enemy he was sure, but he wouldn't be able to move in time. His arms were chasing Naruto's spiral and his head was leaning out, willing his body to move in the other direction, away from the attack he could feel coming. His feet were caught in the middle. Sasuke couldn't move in time.

A shadow appeared, the glint of a kunai, one breath, one gasp, one taste of death before the fog dispersed, blinding him and hot blood spattered across Sasuke's face, into his eyes. He couldn't see. When he opened his eyes again the enemy shadow was gone, the spiral was lying in a pool of red blood and he was on his hands and knees next to something. Another person. Someone with blonde hair and a presence so familiar. Sasuke stared. The colour from Naruto's eyes, vivid blue, had smeared across his now pale face as the scene flickered, the colours watery and faint. Sasuke's hands were soon stained red as he reached to shake the boy while his eyes closed slowly and the blue that had smudged lifted off his skin and escaped. Tear drops made a ripple effect in the crimson blood. A heartbeat Sasuke hadn't noticed until then, stopped.

When Sasuke woke up, Naruto wasn't there. The young Uchiha leapt from the bed.

"Dobe!"

Nothing.

"Usuratonkachi!"

Silence.

"Naruto!"

No one came.

Sasuke looked around the room hurriedly before his eyes found a scrap of paper on the dresser next to his bed. On the paper was a quickly scrawled note in Naruto's messy handwriting.

_Got to go. See you later_

_Naruto. _

Sasuke frowned a little. What could Naruto possibly have to do today? There was no training he was sure. His heart skipped a beat. Was he running away? Regretting what happened? Was he scared they wouldn't be able to stay together? Did he want to be together? Sasuke blinked. _Together_... It sounded so sappy. So superficial. What he felt wasn't superficial. But what else could you call it? He had said "I love you" to Naruto. That's what it was? Love? Maybe. He had said it before to Naruto; that he thought he might have forgotten the feeling of love. But maybe he just needed time to find it again. Knowing that... and after what had happened between them, had Naruto really run away from him?

Sasuke bit his lip. Reading so much into something like this was out of character for him… But it was possible. After all, Naruto was going to be Hokage one day. Would the village accept a person who was so close to someone like Uchiha Sasuke?

Sasuke shook his head and sighed loudly. The note said 'see you later' didn't it? It didn't sound like he was running away, so he probably wasn't. Naruto usually just said whatever he wanted without ordering things in his head so if he was leaving without planning on seeing him 'later' he would have said.

"_I've probably loved you for a long time now..."_

Naruto had said that. Naruto's nindo was all about keeping his promises.

"I never go back on my word!"

It applied to this kind of thing too right? Naruto definitely wasn't running away. Something inside Sasuke loosened; a tightness easing. Laughing a little, he pushed his palm over one side of his face, his fingers gripping his long bangs. His hand was clammy. Emotional overload from such a little thing; he wasn't used to it. He usually just locked it all away but suddenly when it came to Naruto... It wasn't like that before. Could "I love you" change so much between them?

"Just what have you done to me Usuratonkachi...?"

…

Sasuke hung around at home most of the morning, sitting outside on the veranda like he and Naruto had but the house was eerily quiet after the blonde's loud presence in it for two days.

It was a little cloudy, the daylight faint and water washed on the grass in the garden. It reminded him of the way the blue in his last dream had run and smeared. Maybe it would rain to match the second one, Sasuke mused lazily, unable to keep every thought from coming back his blonde teammate in one way or another. His house was filled with the boy; his scent in Sasuke's room, his crouching footprints by the pond, his voice still lingering in the hallway, his taste, despite breakfast and a shower, on Sasuke's lips. He couldn't not think about him.

Sasuke growled quietly to himself. This was so stupid. Was he really going to sit around doing nothing but think of Naruto? So something had changed, that didn't make _pining _for his company any less pathetic. He reminded himself the tiniest bit of his fan girls. Well, at least I'm being quiet about it, thought Sasuke but immediately regretted it as a strange mix of embarrassment and fury erupted in his chest.

This is out of control! Come on Sasuke! Get it together! Go and do something constructive!

The young Uchiha stood, his trademark scowl pulling at his features. His footsteps were firm and quick as he pushed the gate that lead out onto the road with more force than needed. Its old hinges creaked and groaned in protest.

…

The village was alive and full of people, despite the deteriorating weather. The air had a cool edge to it that heightened the colours and sounds of Konoha. Sasuke walked with his eyes lowered, hands in his pockets, lips in a tight line. All childish wonderment had left him long ago. The sights and sounds didn't make his heart race the slightest. If he was with Naruto he definitely would have been dragged to look at all the bright things for sale. Naruto loved that kind of thing. Sasuke pinched himself on the leg through his shorts. Stop that. He clenched his teeth. It wasn't unpleasant to think of the other boy, but the sudden change scared him a bit.

As he neared a fork in the road Sasuke heard his name being called.

"Sasuke! Sasuke!" He turned and looked over his shoulder. The voice wasn't very familiar.

"Oi! Sasuke!" Sasuke stopped and turned fully, his eyes meeting the form of the Nara boy from Ino's team. Nara Shikamaru. Sasuke lifted his eyebrows. He couldn't recall a time when this boy had actually approached him on his own accord. They hadn't really interacted. He was just that lazy, so called "genius" from his academy class.

"Sasuke," said Shikamaru, his small dark eyes watched the Uchiha carefully. Sharp and precise without any effort; naturally that way. The eyes of a genius maybe.

"Hey, I don't think its any of my business..." Shikamaru looked away and then brought his eyes back to Sasuke. "But, did you and Naruto have a fight or something?" he asked. Sasuke's eyebrows shot up under his dark hair, his mask completely slipping. That was so far from the truth it shocked all the attitude out of Sasuke for a moment. Shikamaru took in his reaction, his thin eyebrows twitching into a deeper frown, his mouth turning down at the corners.

"It's just, I saw him this morning and he looked like he was crying," continued the Nara boy. "I called out to him but he ran straight past me. I thought you might have fought, he gets pretty worked up over you." Shikamaru changed his stance uncomfortably. He had said what he wanted to and now there was an awkward tang to the air between them. Sasuke turned to hide his face.

"We didn't fight," he replied and started to walk again.

We didn't fight. But why were you crying?

Sasuke walked calmly, fighting the desire to bite his lip.

The apartment blocked loomed tall over head as Sasuke stood at the bottom of the stairs, one hand on the cool railing. He had actually ended up here. He had come out to clear his head, to stop thinking about the blonde but here he was at Naruto's place. At the top of the steps would be Naruto. Sasuke sighed. I'm here and he's probably sleeping or stuffing his face with ramen like an idiot. But then Shikamaru's words came back to him and he tightened his grip on the rail. Just check on him and leave. Scold him for leaving such a messy, unreadable note, and then leave. He started to climb the stairs slowly; his stomach did a weird flip.

"Naruto? Are you here?" Sasuke stood in the open doorway. The untidy room smelt strange and there was a weird whirring sound coming from somewhere, a dull rattling that he couldn't figure out. A bad feeling settled in the pit of his stomach, suppressing the funny little jumps and dragging the smirk from his face.

"Naruto?" Sasuke pulled a kunai from his holster and spun it nervously in his fingers for a moment before flicking it firmly into his hand and took a silent step forward. The air was thick with his own tension. He didn't call anymore as he edged into the little kitchenette and checked behind the counter. Nothing.

From the far side of the room the boy looked around carefully. Was Naruto just not home? But then what was with this feeling he had and the door had been open. What was that noise? It was getting louder the longer he concentrated on it. His eyes locked on the shiny door handle of a room to his left. The bathroom. There? Sasuke approached it quietly and reached for the handle. The metal was oddly warm in his palm.

"Dobe?"

Orange chakra burst forward and shrouded Sasuke in a deep cloak, the door frame splintered beside him. Sasuke yelped in surprise but no other noise could be heard apart from the thundering roar of the swirling chakra. He was forced to his knees and the door behind him disappeared into orange. The whole room was filled with the stuff. Sasuke couldn't see anything, his eyes being pushed closed by the rapid movement of the energy. His whole body was heavy with it, he couldn't breathe. This power, he's felt it before, only for a short time but it was the same. The same as that time. No. Where was Naruto?

Sasuke shielded his eyes and opened them; thin slits. On the far side of the room was a shadow.

"Naruto?" The words were ripped from inside his mouth before they reached his lips. In slow, desperate 'steps' on his hands and knees, the Uchiha moved towards the dark orange silhouette huddled in the corner. The jerky movements were agonizing. So painfully slow. Terror and panic was making its way up his throat, climbing out of his mouth and Sasuke found himself screaming or sobbing, he couldn't tell. His face was dry. The chakra was unbearable. A blazing flame, tearing at his flesh without making a mark on his pale skin. He closed his eyes as he crawled. He tasted blood in his mouth but there was none there. The orange flames smelt like death.

Suddenly it grew quieter and Sasuke thought he must have gone deaf because he could still feel the chakra whipping his hair onto his face. He opened one eye and then opened the other.

"NARUTO!" Sasuke leapt forward, grabbing for the other boy who was writhing on the ground, his whole body consumed with the hot orange chakra. As soon as Sasuke's hands touched him they were burnt, the skin blistering and bursting on contact. Sasuke grit his teeth.

"Naruto! Wake up! What's going on?" Sasuke yelled and shook the other boy, dragging him into a sitting position. Naruto's face wavered in the heat of the chakra, his now ragged whiskers curving and then straightening, distorting his expression. Behind Naruto, Sasuke could see the slight outline of a number of tails, thickest and most visible closest to their master and then wild and flaring into a sea of choking energy further out, losing all shape and form.

"Naruto! Please! What is this?" He already knew the answer. It was the power of the Kyuubi. They were wrong to let it be and now this was happening!

Chakra flicked out from Sasuke's right and slashed a cut across his face. It was more violent here; quieter but more violent. It could hurt him now, a hushed killer. It was completely impossible to see the way out; there was only Sasuke and Naruto in the small bathroom. Even if Sasuke could manage to get them out he was sure the chakra would follow them. It was Naruto's after all.

Suddenly, at that moment, Naruto's eyelids snapped back. They were electric blue and Sasuke drew back, the sight of the familiar colour startling him into near tears.

"Naruto?" Sasuke whispered. His pulse throbbed in his head, centred on the cut in cheek. The boy before him looked up at him helplessly, his bright irises shivering, his mouth open in a silent scream. To Sasuke's horror Naruto began to cry. His sobs were feral howls and his tears were thick and red like blood. He began to claw at himself, drawing blood quickly, the wounds ragged and raw and then instantly healing or opening even more. Extreme to extreme. Naruto screamed in what Sasuke guessed was pain or disgust.

"Naruto!" Sasuke grabbed his wrists and threw him against the wall, their skin burning against each other, through their clothes where they touched. "Listen to me! You've got to stop!" Naruto thrashed in his arms, screaming and crying; a beast with the terrified eyes and tears of a child. Sasuke could smell his breath close to his, like rotting meat.

Naruto flung his arms out wildly and the flame around them became hotter as he freed his hands with impossible strength and sunk his claws into Sasuke's back and started frantically raking the sharpened nails over the flesh, tearing it. The floor and walls were soon covered with Sasuke's blood, but the Uchiha didn't let go. He cried out as Naruto ripped him apart but he didn't let go. His touch had calmed the horrible power before and he was holding onto that last hope. That he could save them both. The blonde struggled harder.

Naruto sunk his teeth into Sasuke's shoulder and the grip broke. Sasuke screamed and fell backwards. Kyuubi took the chance and threw out an arm. The force of it threw Sasuke all the way across the room, slamming him painfully against the wall. Blood was everywhere. Both his and Naruto's, but mostly his. Naruto's steamed surreally. They watched each other through an aisle where the chakra had cleared, connecting them. Sasuke breathed heavily, eyes wide open, his whole body on fire, the chakra pressing down on him from above. Blood was pooling around his feet as he sat slumped against the wall.

Naruto's eyes were blue and frightened but the way he rose onto his back feet unsteadily, the way his image shuddered when a wave of orange passed between them... His eyes were a lie.

I'm scared... Sasuke began to tremble. Despite his torn body all he felt was fear. I'm scared... Naruto took a step forward and Sasuke's eyes watched as his lips parted into the two syllables of his name.

I'm scared. I'm scared. His vision was getting blurry with blood loss and was pitched completely into black for a second as he stood slowly, his eyes wide open even as black passed before them. I'm scared.

"Sa... suke..."

"I'm scared, Naruto... I'm scared..."

"Sa...suke..." The blue eyed Kyuubi looked him straight in the eye and Sasuke lost it. A scream filled his chest. He turned and ran...

…

"Kakashi sensei, thank you for helping me carry this." The girl lifted her face to him and smiled.

"It's no problem Sakura," replied the man, adjusting his grip on her big bag of groceries and shook the light rain off his silver hair. They walked in silence for a while and Kakashi's mind wandered, letting himself be led by the sound of Sakura's footsteps under the gentle rain.

"The rain started suddenly didn't it?"  
"Yeah, but it's been kind of miserable all day."

"Yeah."

The quiet atmosphere between them was comfortable.

They turned a corner.

Kakashi's one eye widened, the pupil shrinking at the sight, his heart jumped into his mouth. Sakura screamed beside him and they both dropped their bags. Food went everywhere but neither ninja saw any of that. Kakashi rushed forward, leaving Sakura's side and dropped to his knees.

"SASUKE!" His arms came quickly and carefully under the boy, lifting his head up to look at him. The boy's eyes were just open. Water run over his face making trails in the blood painted on his features.

"SASUKE!" The jounin shook him a little and Sasuke drew a rasping breath.

"...A...ru...o..., Na...u...to..., Na... ru...to..." Kakashi's eyes widened further as Sasuke's closed. Naruto! Where was he? The whole front of Sasuke's shirt was gone and he reeked of something rotten.

"Sasuke! Sasuke!"

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No...

What do I do! Kakashi stared into Sasuke's face, feeling the boy breathe short and shallow, his heartbeat faint through his ruined back.

What do I do! Sasuke needed the hospital right now or he wouldn't make it, but what about Naruto! Sasuke's voice and face. His expression, under the twist of pain was anguished, the tiny light in his dark eyes panicked.

What do I do!

"Saku-!" Kakashi turned to call her but stopped short when his eyes found Sakura collapsed on the wet road unconscious. The jounin growled under his breath.

What do I do! Kakashi pulled Sasuke close to him and clutched the boy, a sob building in his chest.

What do I do!

"Kakashi san!" His head snapped up at his name. Suddenly there were others with him.

"Kakashi san! Kakashi sensei! Get up! Give me Sasuke!" The orders came from Iruka.

"Get up!" Asuma. Asuma was here too.

Kakashi stood and Iruka took Sasuke from him gently. Kakashi tensed as the boy's head lolled back.

"You go to Naruto. I'll take Sasuke," said the shorter man.

"Shouldn't you go to Naruto?" asked Kakashi shakily. Iruka's eyes locked with his.

"No. _You _go to Naruto," he replied and Kakashi was taken back by the panic in his eyes.

"Let's go Kakashi." Kurenai grabbed his arm and he turned, keeping his eyes on his family as long as he could as both Sasuke and Sakura were carried away by Iruka and another ninja.

"Kakashi!" He moved his eyes to the front and became a ninja.

"Hokage sama will meet us there. Naruto's power is out of control," Asuma said next to him, taking charge of him, Kurenai and several other jounin including Nara Shikaku. He would be useful. Kakashi made a choked noise of agreement as the rain became heavier.

Sasuke. Naruto. What happened?


	14. Chapter 14

_Chapter 14! *epic music* It's shorter than usual I know but I promise next chapter will be longer to make up for it T^T Anyway, please feel free to throw things at me for the length and quite possibly the content too. Its fine. I won't even duck. Go for it. _

_What will happen next chapter I wonder. Lets wonder together because I actually don't know whats going to happen O_O hehe~_

_enjoy!_

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Never, was anyone supposed to see this again. Never. This beast with his teardrop shaped wide eyes, burning with red vengeance, the colour of drying blood. His teeth, exposed by his curled back lips, clenched furiously in either the pain of the boy or the anger of the animal. His power, choking to both its host and those who stood at the edge of the small chakra filled room.

Sarutobi Hiruzen blinked slowly, calmly. They were safe but this situation was much more severe than his crystal ball had shown. In the blurry vision, Naruto's eyes were still vividly blue and fighting. But now the boy was trapped. Naruto screamed and howled from where he lay halfway across the room, suppressed by the weight of the chakra, arms reached out feebly, fingers clenching and unclenching, reaching for something unseen. His chakra cloak raged like a wild flame, marring the white walls. He was able to move in the ball too but the violent nature of the demon fox's power had subsided and given way to a slow, sly kind of force that, now that the host could no longer move, no longer hunt, was killing him. The boy cried out, his skin bubbling and bursting. His young, pain stricken face was ruined for a moment before it healed.

The Sandaime turned his mouth down and breathed in and out. Asuma, next to him was shooting him nervous glances. Kakashi, on his other side trembled. Kurenai and Shikaku at the end were tense. But he was calm. He would lead them, because he was the Hokage.

"Hokage sama?"

"Nearly there," he muttered back.

They would move soon. Otherwise Naruto would die. A thick coil of dusty orange chakra snuck up Naruto's torso and gripped his throat. The blonde child lifted his head and roared. Everyone flinched at the noise. It was loud and hoarse but somehow under that, the scream of a child could be heard, no, felt. The coil made a break for Naruto's opened mouth. The Hokage stopped in mid blink.

"NOW!"

Dark shadows shot across the floor and snagged Naruto's body. The beast eyes went wide at the touch of the jutsu. Shikaku grunted from the end of the line when Naruto turned his murderous gaze to him and snarled.

"Don't lose him now," said the Hokage loudly, eyes still trained in the boy.

"Kakashi," he muttered under his breath. "You know what to do." The man next to him tensed and took one step forward. His breath was loud and quick. He didn't move anymore and Naruto started to thrash. Shikaku made a noise of protest. Kyuubi was strong and everyone was getting edgy as Naruto moved onto his hands and knees. The jutsu only just bound him. There was no time for hesitation.

"Naruto look here, look here," called Kurenai and the boy's head snapped around to Kurenai down the line. A few hand signs and Naruto's eyes widened. Genjutsu. She may be able to keep him entranced long enough for Kakashi to get close enough but with Kyuubi nothing was certain. How long would the shadows hold? How long would the genjutsu stay? No one could say. A genjutsu that would show a beast something that could hold him spell bound...was there such a thing? Thankfully they had Kurenai. If there was, she would be able to create it.

"Kakashi." The Hokage placed a steady hand on the jounin's shoulder as he called to him quietly. It slumped under the slight pressure.

"You can do this. Be strong," he encouraged in a whisper. Kakashi turned to him and nodded. Kurenai clicked her tongue gently. She couldn't hold him for too much longer.

"I just have to make him pass out right?" asked Kakashi.

"Yes. That's all. Be careful. You can do this. I believe in you." For a split second, Kakashi was small before the Hokage; thirteen or fourteen, a genin, a child. Something in his eyes was young and scared before the iris filled with colour and the sharingan whirred.

"I can do this..."

"Yes you can."

...

Summer rain on his skin

...

Fireflies in the evening blue

...

Sugar rush on a hot day

...

Smooth river stones under his feet

...

Sunlight through dew drops

...

Sweet sweat on his lips

...

Pink butterflies dancing across orange and blue flowers

...

Sasuke slipped into half consciousness and watched as the butterfly fell to the bottom of his vision and spread in a thick smooth line; vivid pink against the dark backdrop of his eyelids. His eyelashes grew warm, the smell of daffodils filled his nose. His tongue felt thick, limbs dream heavy. There was a dull ache in his arms and back.

Someone was talking. Their voice was soft and sad.

"_...and then I came up here to see you."_

A hand was holding his; small and gentle, the thumb on the outside making small circles on his.

"_Kakashi sensei comes to see you too. I usually leave though because he's pretty grumpy at the moment. I think he's really worried."_

Silence. The butterfly was still in mid air.

"_I wonder when you will wake up, Sasuke kun_..." A sigh.

The pink butterfly before him rose up and dipped and dived with the jump of her voice, dropping and curving almost to the bottom again when she sighed.

"_You know. I hope you wake up soon... I can't do much more by myself... You're really worrying me. Both you and Naruto, you're both so reckless and always getting into trouble, especially Naruto. I don't know what to do with you guys anymore." _

The hand tightened as she laughed emptily.

"_...It was just like on that mission with Tazuna san... You're face looked the same. All pale and lifeless. I can't believe I fainted. Pretty useless huh? Sorry I'm not more help. Maybe if I was I wouldn't be the one left alone at times like this..."_

His hand lifted and her mouth kissed his knuckles lightly.

"_I'm scared. I need you Sasuke kun..." _

The butterfly spiralled but then was pushed back up in a rush of blue when a new voice spoke up as a door somewhere opened.

"_Forehead?"_

Another butterfly, bigger and stronger than the little pink one.

"_Ino..." _

"_You're still here?"_

"_Yeah. I just went down to try and see Naruto and then came up here." _

"_Did you get to see him? I heard from Shikamaru they're holding him under the hospital. His dad was there you know."_

The butterflies danced around each other. Sasuke breathed out as their wings brushed. No one noticed his breathing hitch when the butterflies came close to each other.

"_No, I didn't see him. Well, I tried. Iruka sensei was in the waiting room and I made him tell me how Naruto was and then take me down to see him, I figured I had the right to see him but I passed out at the top of the stairs and he had to carry me back out. It was too much."_

"_Yeah. I saw Asuma sensei on the way up here. He was carrying Kurenai sensei. They both look pretty worn out."_

The pink shape of the butterfly dipped.

Quiet for a moment. Three people breathing.

"_...It's terrible. The chakra is horrible. He's been down there for four days. He won't wake up... He's not in danger any more but something in stopping him from coming back... That's what Kakashi sensei said..." _

Wing to wing, the two butterflies descended. One girl sobbed brokenly.

"_Come on Sakura... Don't cry. It makes your face look bad. It's ok... They're both gonna be fine. Sasuke will wake up anytime now. What did the doctors tell you?"_

The pink butterfly's wings fluttered feebly.

"_That he should be waking up soon. Only a couple of the wounds will scar because they got to him quickly but he lost a lot of blood so we have to wait..." _

She sniffed.

"_Sakura. You should go home. You look tired." _

"_But what if one of them-"_

"_They'll call you if Sasuke gets up. And Naruto... well. He could be a while I guess. Come back tomorrow ok?"_

The butterflies were melting at the bottom of Sasuke's line of sight. Pink and Blue. Purple. A chair scraped.

"_Bye Sasuke kun... Wake up soon."_

A soft hand moved his fringe off his forehead and fingertips found his cheek. He didn't move.

"_Bye Bye..."_ she said softly, distantly from across the room. The door clicked shut. Sasuke opened his eyes.

"Naruto..."

…

Kakashi's footsteps were slow as he walked up the stairs to the third floor. Sasuke was on this floor right? He couldn't really remember. 24 hours under the hospital on watch and off; staying because he couldn't bring himself to leave until one of the other jounin had told him to get out, had done a real number on the silver haired jounin. He'd go up and check on Sasuke and then maybe try to get some sleep. Not that he thought he would be able to. He hadn't slept in four days.

"_We think something in his mind is keeping him in the Kyuubi state. Its like he doesn't want to come back..."_

"_Like what? What could be keeping him there?"_

"_Like something he can't face...?"  
"..."_

Kakashi frowned.

Something Naruto couldn't face...

Sasuke's pale face flashed in front of his eyes. Was that it? The boy was hurt pretty bad but he wasn't dead. But Naruto didn't know that. Was that it? Was it Sasuke? The jounin pinched the bridge of his nose to ward of a headache he could feel building.

If he had hurt someone as close to him as Sasuke was to Naruto like that, would he be able to carry on? Kakashi didn't know. He'd never let someone come that close. What would Sasuke say when he woke up and found out that Naruto was still in the Kyuubi state. He wasn't dangerous; he just lay in his cage under the hospital like a good little fox, slowly eating away at anyone's energy that was near with his demonic chakra. He wouldn't wake. He didn't eat either. Maybe the nine tailed beast didn't care for the food they left for him. Maybe he didn't have the energy to get up from where he lay.

"_And the cause?"_

"_No one can say for sure..."_

Over time the seal had weakened and a number of factors could have contributed to the crack in its hold. That's what the Hokage had said. But no one knew enough. Not even the medics, who were considering the possibility that physical damage to the seal mark itself could have helped. Was that even a valid argument? If so.. Was it Kakashi's fault that Naruto was like this then? That wound from their last mission...

Shaking his head, the man walked slowly down the third story hallway.

"What are you doing? Please! Get back in bed!"

Kakashi opened his one weary eye. What was all the commotion? What were the nurses all yelling about?

There was a loud crash and one woman screamed. Kakashi picked up his feet into a run and rounded a corner.

"Sasuke?"

In the middle of the corridor stood his dark haired student. His head was bowed and he was panting as he struggled against the nurses. All the wires from his monitors were broken.

"What are you doing you idiot!" yelled Kakashi and the boy lifted his face at the familiar voice, his expression somewhat surprised, under the twist of anger, frustration and pain, at the aggressive tone his teacher was using. Sasuke coughed and cringed, nearly going down onto his knees. He swayed a bit but continued to resist the nurses' efforts to get him back into his room. The older ninja took two steps forward and raised his voice.

"Sasuke! Get back in bed right now!" The boy stopped struggling and attempted to retreat as in a few long quick strides, Kakashi was upon him and hoisting him over his shoulder. The nurses pulled back and the jounin carried the boy back into his room and threw him down on the bed.

"What the hell do you think you're doing? Don't you know you're supposed to be resting?" Kakashi climbed onto the bed and knelt above Sasuke who was curling in on himself in pain. A gash on his arm had reopened. The man's dark eyes flicked over Sasuke's form, waiting for an answer that he knew the stubborn teen wouldn't give.

"Sasuke! What were you thinking?" Sasuke opened his eyes and glared. His stare was unsteady, shaken by the character change in Kakashi. The jounin knew he must be confused by it but that was fine. Kakashi hadn't slept in two days and the desperation for the blue of Naruto's eyes or the deep black of Sasuke's had been killing him. He was actually quite glad to see the boy so energetic but what kind of idiot gets out of a hospital bed when they're that badly injured? Sasuke's glare fell away and he averted his eyes to the pillow that fallen to the floor when he had been thrown onto the bed.

"But that Usuratonkachi is here too... He's not...I thought... I just... I want see him," admitted Sasuke and they both felt suddenly uncomfortable with weakness in his voice.

"You could have reopened you're wounds and died Sasuke. The big ones on your back aren't completely healed. You could have died and what use would you have been to Naruto then?" asked Kakashi coldly. Sasuke's anger spiked and Kakashi felt the hair on the back of his neck raise with it

"A lot more than I am now!" cried Sasuke. Kakashi let the boy try to sit up before pushing back down roughly by the shoulders.

"Sasuke! That's not true!" A hot anger flared under his rib cage.

Just stay down! You want to worry me more?

Kakashi bit his lip, trying to fight the urge to growl or sob. He wasn't sure which. Sasuke looked back at him with a face that said, 'yes it is'. Anger bubbled again.

"Do you know what it's like right now? Naruto is down there all alone! Suffering! I can't stand to be down there but I have to because I love him! I love you all! We might have to erase his memories to get him to wake up! He can't stand what he's done! And then I come up here everyday to check on you and sometimes Sakura is here so I have to lie! Even though she knows that Naruto isn't getting better! Even though she knows, I lie! I tell her it's all going to be alright when I know its not!"

Sasuke was silent. Kakashi was silent, his head hung, panting, and voice hoarse. He took a moment before he realized what he had just said. The amount of honesty his words held was frightening. Things he hadn't really accepted himself.

"Sasuke..." he said brokenly. "I'm sorry. I'm just tired. It's making me like this. I.." He stopped and watched the face beneath him.

"Sasuke?" In the moment of looking into his face, the person beneath him was no longer just the strong, confident Sasuke he knew. His face wasn't hard and guarded. He was that little boy who had lost it all. The little boy that time had stopped for. Kakashi's eyes grew wide. Something about that face was terrifying. Sasuke couldn't have a face like this.

"It's not going to be ok..." murmured Sasuke. "If he wakes up he won't know us... And everything will be gone..." The boy's eyes were wide and then, to Kakashi's horror, tears formed in Sasuke's eyes and he didn't stop them. They rolled over the bridge of his nose and seeped into the sheet as he lay very still on his side.

"Again. Everything is going to be gone... again... What did I do wrong...?" Kakashi sat up, unable to comprehend what was happening, feeling the sting of tears in his own eyes.

"Sasuke..." he reached out to stroke Sasuke's hair. The boy cringed and his face screwed up. He looked like a child.

"Sasuke... Please stop..."

Sasuke didn't and Kakashi had to look away.

Sasuke cried silently for a long time and all Kakashi could do was sit with him until he was done; terrified to stay but too scared to leave. This wasn't in the job description.

"We're both a bit out of sorts today aren't we?" said Kakashi quietly, trying to lighten the atmosphere. "It'll be alright... you'll see."

"No it won't," replied Sasuke thickly.

"Maybe he'll wake up and we won't have to get rid of his memories."

"..."

"Wishful thinking ne?"

"..."


	15. Chapter 15

_You know. Now that I look at it, my last chapter -looks- pretty long ^_^ Yay for pretty spacing! _

_Vocab to know: Otousan- Dad_Oneechan- Big Sister. _

_Enjoy Chapter 15!~_

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Sakura stood in the corner of Sasuke's room while Kakashi sat by the boy's side.

"Sasuke. Get up. We have to go now," said Kakashi quietly. Sasuke didn't move. He just lay there with his eyes closed; pretending to be asleep.

"You have to see him at some point Sasuke."

It had been another four days since Kakashi had come to Sakura's house and told her. Naruto's memories were going to be erased that day because he wasn't showing signs of coming out of the Kyuubi state. The medics and the Hokage were concerned that leaving him any longer might have permanent effects. If what was keeping him there was something to with a certain moment or issue he couldn't get past in his mind, erasing his memories was their only chance to bring him out of it.

Sakura had cried and begged Kakashi not to do it. He told her he couldn't change his orders. Anger had come too and she had tried to throw things at him but he dodged them all and pinned her to his chest in a tight embrace. All Sakura's anger was melted away by the shock of the action and the safety that his arms provided. Kakashi sat and held her while she cried. Maybe he had cried too. She couldn't recall. He had then apologized to her and left without another word. When her mother asked if she was alright from the doorway she didn't answer. Everything was so unfair. Sakura hadn't seen her sensei or Sasuke since then either, even though the hospital had called to tell her Sasuke was awake.

A special technique, unique to the sharingan had been used on Naruto by Kakashi. Sakura couldn't even imagine how hard it must have been to be the one that would take away Naruto's memories. The jutsu forced the mind to suppress itself through suggestion. It was all through careful hinting that Naruto had locked away everything and forgotten. It left no room for doubt and convinced the mind that the only way was to erase everything in a act to protect itself against whatever was going on inside. An amazing jutsu. An amazing loss.

Apparently after the jutsu had been performed Naruto had come back to his senses and had been in hospital, unconscious for two days. The other two days he had been spending all his time with Iruka and Kakashi; trying to familiarize him with someone and create a bond that had been particularly strong and quick to form before he had lost his memories.

He must have been so scared, thought Sakura, biting her lip.

Today was the day they were going to be reintroduced to their team mate. According to Kakashi, Naruto was fine and after getting over the initial terror of not knowing who or where he was and latching on to his two old teachers for support, he was now finding the prospect of relearning everything pretty thrilling. That sounded just like Naruto. He was always curious about everything. Getting to know himself and everyone else again would probably be the most exciting game ever.

It was weird to think about. Not knowing who or where you were, having no memories. All the things that Naruto was relearning right now; the faces, the smells, the feelings, were just things Sakura had learnt as a child or as she grew up. She didn't even remember coming to know them. She just knew. It had been learnt so gradually throughout her life that she didn't even realize she had learnt it. Being told everything at once would be so strange. So frightening if it were her.

Would Naruto be the same? Without his memories to shape it would his personality be similar to the boy they knew? If an important memory that had really impacted on him was lost, would it change him completely?

"Sasuke. They're expecting us. Iruka told Naruto he'd be meeting his friends today. He really wants you to come."

After a long moment of silence, Sasuke opened his eyes. Sakura held her breath. It was the first time she had seen him with his eyes open since he'd woken up. He had just ignored everyone the whole time she and Kakashi had been there. There was something different in his face. Sakura watched him carefully as he slowly sat up and looked to Kakashi and then to her.

"Sasuke kun..." Tears filled her eyes as he looked her straight in the eye for a second before looking away.

It was there. It tainted the sharpness of his dark eyes; clouded them. It was there and Sakura could feel it radiate from him. Heartbreak.

"Oh Sasuke kun..." she whispered. He got up and glared at Kakashi. 'Get out' in Sasuke language. In the hospital gown he looked long and unusually skinny.

They left the room to stand in the corridor to wait. Sakura tried not to cry. For Sasuke and the heartbreak in his eyes. For Naruto and his lost memories.

"You shouldn't cry when we get there ok? He'll be confused," said Kakashi softly.

"Y-yeah," murmured Sakura back, wiping her eyes and taking a few deep breaths. "I'll do my best."

"That a girl." He smiled kindly at her from under his mask. Sakura smiled back.

I'll do my best. So Sasuke kun, try to hide the heartbreak in your eyes. Do your best.

…

They watched Naruto from the door way. He was on the other side of the long room with Kakashi who had entered ahead of them. Sakura cringed as Naruto's lips parted to form the ending 'san' on the end of Iruka and Kakashi's names. Iruka san. Kakashi san. That wasn't right. But he didn't remember them teaching him. He didn't remember the academy days with Iruka or the missions with Kakashi.

By her side, Sasuke was tense. Sakura chanced a glance at his face and wished she hadn't. He was very good. Better than she thought. A smooth, flawless mask; unnatural and completely perfect. Could he hold it? He did a little side step towards her and their elbows touched.

Not so perfect.

She moved closer to him and nearly fell, not realizing how unsteady her body was. He pressed against her without turning his head.

"It's ok," he whispered gruffly.

Was it? Was it really? How was he so calm?

There was another person in the room. A woman, blonde and beautiful but with a hard expression, her crème brulee brown eyes watching Naruto closely. Her hand moved fluidly, fingers wrapped around a pen as she took notes. Who was she? Sakura had never seen her in the village before. A medic? A specialist? There wasn't time to wonder any longer. Naruto looked up and saw them and Sakura couldn't breathe. She gasped and felt like she might throw up. Sasuke grabbed her wrist to steady her as she swayed and then slipped his hand into hers and squeezed a little.

"You're so annoying," he muttered and Sakura laughed breathily. She sounded delirious.

"Whatever you do, don't cry," he said.

"Yeah... You too..."

She felt him frown. They stepped into the room.

Naruto's eyes held no recognition and the urge to throw up grew stronger as he approached.

Where was he? Their baby? The baby of their family? Where was he? Where was that spark in him?

Sakura tried to calm herself. They were only just meeting. It'd come soon, right? He'd react the same to them, right? He was still Naruto. He was still going to be the same person. Right? Even if he had forgotten, the first impressions would be the same. He would still be rough with Sasuke and gentle with Sakura. Right?

Iruka's hand was on Naruto's shoulder and the teacher was smiling in their direction. The woman stood to the side without introduction. It didn't really matter. Everyone's attention was on Naruto. She wasn't important. Kakashi came to stand behind them and put his hands on their shoulders too. It was like being introduced by your parents to their friend's child.

"Naruto, these are your friends. Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Sasuke," said Iruka gently and lifted his hand. Naruto took a step forward and smiled, wide and warm.

"Nice to meet you, again I guess, Haruno san, Uchiha san."

Sasuke crushed her hand. Neither ninja could speak. Shock. Time stopped.

Naruto had taught her a lot about pain. The pain of loneliness, anger, frustration, love...

How to take it without giving back, how to hide it with a big smile and silliness, how to see it and know what to do, how to heal it, how to live through it...

He had taught her so much. And now, he was teaching her about a new kind of pain. The pain of unfamiliarity. His eyes; the different shade of blue they were when he looked at them. The tone of his voice; the way he said their names.

Haruno san. Uchiha san. That wasn't who they were to him. Since when was he that formal? That polite? Since now. Since there was no recollection of every meeting them, ever knowing them at all.

Haruno san. Uchiha san. Who was that? They were Sakura chan and Sasuke.  
Kakashi sensei, Sakura chan, Sasuke.

Kakashi san, Haruno san, Uchiha san.

Fingernails dug into the back of her hand. The pads of Sasuke's fingers were pushing painfully between her tendons. Poor Sasuke kun. She didn't blink. Poor Sasuke kun. He needed saving and she couldn't do it. Poor Sasuke kun. Naruto's face was blank as they stared.

Naruto, what are you doing? Hurry up. Save him. Save him. Say something. Say it's all a joke. Complain about being in the hospital too long. Yell about training. Do something. Say something. Save him. Please save him. Save him with that smile of yours. Say... Say...

"Woah! Are my two closest friends are couple? That sucks!" exclaimed Naruto. Time started again and Sakura laughed a little.

Her and Sasuke? That's funny Naruto... But it's not what I wanted you to say.

"No," said Kakashi's voice behind them. Sakura looked up at him, breaking away from Naruto's eyes, from the horrible breathlessness that came every time he spoke.

"We're like a family. You're part of it too if that's still alright with you that is," continued Kakashi. His fingertips trembled on Sakura's shoulder when he spoke the word 'family'. Naruto was silent for a while. Iruka smiled and bent his head to Naruto to speak.

"What is it Naruto?"

"... I don't have family right?"

Sakura tensed.

"No. You don't. They were killed in an accident. I told you that already remember?"

How odd that must be. Knowing you've been alone all your life but not being able to recall anything about it. Guessing you must have been lonely. Assuming you had cried so many times. And yet... Feeling nothing.

Sakura was watching Naruto's face as it worked to try and come up with something related to the fact he had no real family when Kakashi spoke.

"Oneechan," he said and touched Sakura's head. Naruto looked up and his eyes lingered on her, on her face, trying to grab something from inside. Something about her.

"Otousan," continued Kakashi, and touched his own chest.

"Sasuke." His hand dropped into Sasuke's long dark hair.

"Naruto." He pointed to Naruto and Sakura smiled as Naruto smiled. Was Sasuke smiling? She didn't want to look away from Naruto to see. Big sis, Dad, and Sasuke. That's what they were. A family. That's how their bonds worked. Sasuke wasn't brother because of Sakura and Kakashi's theory. But they were always together. The closest people to each other. So, so important. Number ones. A family.

"This is your family, if you'll have us," said Kakashi and Naruto nodded and grinned. Sasuke's grip tightened and Sakura gasped and tried to flex her fingers but didn't pull away. The roles had switched. He wasn't holding hands for her. He was holding hands for himself. She was supporting him. It must be so horrible for him right now.

"I'm glad I've made such good friends," said Naruto. Something stirred in Sakura's chest.

"But do I really have to call you and Haruno san; Otousan and Oneechan? And how come Uchiha san doesn't have a position? Is he just Uchiha san?"

Everyone laughed at his comment except Sasuke. The laughter was thick and forced and then suddenly Sakura was in tears. She couldn't stop as her giggles turned to wrenched sobs.

Haruno san...

Kakashi san...

Uchiha san...

_Uchiha san..._

Who was that? How painful. Why was he still calling Sasuke that when everyone else in the room was addressing him by his first name?

Kakashi's hand was on her back and Sasuke had stepped in front of her. The tears wouldn't stop. She could feel everyone's eyes on her. She was breaking down in front of Iruka sensei, in front of the nameless blonde woman, in front of Naruto. Shame burnt her ears but she couldn't bring herself to care enough through the tears.

"Maybe you better go. That's enough for today," said Iruka quietly and Kakashi ushered her and Sasuke out of the room but stayed himself. The door shut with a loud click and Sakura stood for a moment with her hand over her mouth, gasping as her chest collapsed before she felt like the walls were going to close in on her. It was hot. Her body was hot. Air, air, air. Where was the air? She was choking on her own tears, her own sadness.

She ran. Sasuke followed. She pounded down the hallway and stumbled over the stairs until on the first floor; Sakura lost her footing and fell. Her body spun and she reached for Sasuke but he didn't try to catch her. He let her fall and she watched tiny droplets of her tears fly into the air before she hit the ground heavily and skidded on the smooth surface.

"You really are annoying," he said softly, staring down at her. His face was closed and she began to sob harder as she tried to get onto her hands and knees. Her throat burned with the salt from her tears.

Naruto, that idiot! How could he do this to them! To her! To Sasuke!

She sobbed loudly. So many emotions. Anger, sadness, terror... Above all, the shock of Naruto just having no idea who they were. How important he was. She was crying too much; she knew. She was making a scene, a mess of herself. But it didn't matter. She didn't care.

Several nurses passed by but none made a move towards them. Him and her. Her on her hands and knees, him standing by her side. Her, being selfish again. She wished Sasuke would cry. Why didn't he cry?

Because he was Sasuke.

"What are you crying so much for? Why do you look so hurt? He's not gonna annoy you anymore with his _love _anymore," said Sasuke tightly. Sakura could hit him. She had never felt something like this towards him. How could he say that? When he loved Naruto! When he was supposed to be the one who was the most upset, the one who should be crying, not her. But she couldn't do it. Even with her head down she couldn't yell or rise to him.

Because he was Sasuke.

"I'm crying for you..." she murmured wetly. She lifted her head to say something else but when she did something caught her eye. A certain something in Sasuke's eyes. Despite his cold expression it was there again. No matter how much he was trying to blow it off. To pretend it wasn't there. That he couldn't feel it. That all this meant nothing... Heartbreak. Again. She clenched her fist and then unclenched them and lifted herself unsteadily onto her two feet. Everything was so unfair. There was a dull throbbing in her hand where Sasuke's fingertips had been. Poor Sasuke kun.

"Sasuke kun..." she lifted her arms and took his face in her hands. His eyes widened. She didn't touch him. He never let her. She never really tried that hard.

'_Why do you look so hurt?'_

I'm not.

"Sasuke kun," she said again, gently. He was a child. He wasn't strong like his stance and words made him seem. His eyes betrayed him. She saw. She, who knew_ almost_ everything about him, she, the only one left who knew _him_; Uchiha Sasuke.

"The one who looks hurt is you... I'm so sad. And sorry," she said to him, watching his eyes cloud with emotion. Tears were making thick tracks on her face. She couldn't stop. She always cried when she needed to be strong.

"I'm so, so sad, because you love him so much, and he doesn't know it like he used to..."

He bolted. Ripping his face from her palms, he bolted. Straight out the hospital door and she slumped back to her knees.

Everything was so unfair.

Anger.

Sadness.

Terror.

Shock.

Poor Kakashi _sensei_. Poor _Sakura chan_. Poor, poor _Sasuke._


	16. Chapter 16

_I am -so- sorry this took so long. But. My laptop fan died so the whole thing was out of commission. i went into serious withdrawal for a while. _

_Apparently some of the words I used in this chapter aren't actually words. Like 'unintroduced'. I'm choosing to not believe that so I left it. Meh. What are you gonna do? It makes sense to me.  
_

_Anyway, Chapter 16 ^_^ Enjoy!  
_

_P.S: I saw a guy in the bus exchange in Christchurch sitting like L a couple of days ago. I laughed cos he was old. Thought I might share that ;)_

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The boy couldn't imagine anything stranger than what was happening right now. Not in this moment exactly. Just this situation as a whole. Nothing could be stranger than waking up and having no idea where or who he was.

The people who all looked at him, Uzumaki Naruto, so familiarly that it hurt a little were the worst part. The most confusing part.

Iruka san. A teacher. His teacher apparently. Someone with safe warmth and a brave smile. But Naruto couldn't see it; that bond that he was told they had.

Did it hurt? Was he hurting someone so gentle? Someone whose hand on his shoulder was tender and reassuring. His safe harbor since he had woken.

Kakashi san. One of the top ninja in the village. A... jounin? The tall guy who smiled kindly at him; a soft, easy air about him. Was Naruto hurting him too? This man who was all casual comments and vague humour. How close had they been? The ninja didn't seem to want to get too close. Hesitance? Or normal behaviour?

Was he hurting them? Naruto couldn't tell. He had just met them. He didn't know them. But they knew him.

And then there was Haruno Sakura; Haruno san. Cute, with her pretty pink hair and sea foam green eyes. She was really something.

Her face when she had come to visit. When she first entered her expression was relaxed enough, only small traces of apprehension as she smiled the tiniest bit. And then Naruto had spoken and something just in the words seemed to break her. Naruto had no idea what was going through her mind but he watched the emotions strike and wound her. Even as she tried to hide it. He didn't look at her much, out of guilt. He had definitely hurt her. She had cried when it had become too much but it hadn't hurt him to see her tears. They were friends and he felt nothing more than a niggling confusion and a sodden guilt on his shoulders towards her tears. How horrible of him.

And then.

Uchiha Sasuke... He was a mystery. When he walked in and lifted his face Naruto's heart had stopped. He was so cold, so blank, and so incredibly beautiful. His narrow, charcoal eyes had raised and locked with the cobalt blue ones across the room for a split second and all Naruto could do was smile dumbly. But what a feeling. Deep inside. A rush. More than he had felt from anyone else. With Kakashi and Iruka no emotion had been provoked in him without being told who they were to him. But with this boy... It was hard to explain what was happening, but the fact that Naruto could feel by himself had smacked him in the chest, leaving him breathless. He knew nothing about what their bond was like but he wanted to. Desperation had risen in his chest, gripping him so tightly he couldn't move. A gasp brushed the inside of his smiling lips and a hot orange-tinged itch teased at the back of his mind as Naruto tried to reach for anything about this boy. A voice, a smile, a laugh, a line. Anything. Just a tiny detail before someone ruined it and told him who they were together. But there was nothing to grab at. He had no idea who he was.

"...Uchiha Sasuke."

The strange flutter that tingled the blonde's body disappeared.

He would never know now. He would have to wait to be told what he felt for this boy in front of him. He wasn't allowed to figure it out by himself because he was a baby now. With no memories, no feelings, no bonds to cling to. In that one moment... Goodbye. Goodbye to the one free feeling since he had awoken. Goodbye to the rush and dizziness that he couldn't place. Goodbye to the boy with the deep eyes and dark hair, the perfect, straight line mouth. Goodbye to any words that could really _reach_ him from those lips. Goodbye to Uchiha Sasuke and any right to call him by his first name.

'Uchiha san' felt wrong and tasted stale and sour when it rolled on his tongue. But he couldn't call him anything else now because as soon as he had learnt the name, the emotion was gone and Uchiha Sasuke became another soul he had to relearn. Another person he didn't know.

It wasn't possible to know him without a name. To carry on without a name. But all the same. The name took the first feeling. And somehow that didn't sit right with the blonde. Somehow. No feeling, was wrong. He had wanted so much to hold onto that one feeling. But it was impossible to know the boy without his name.

Naruto stood in front of the mirror in the hospital room's little bathroom watching the boy in the mirror.

A round face with soft curves, wild blonde hair, clear summer sky blue eyes. He lifted his hands and jumped when the boy did the same. They touched their cheeks together, tracing the thin lines the stretched across them. The skin beneath his fingertips was warm and smooth. What was with this face? Whiskers? How weird. Blinking slowly Naruto stepped a little closer. What was this face meant for? He pulled his eyebrows together and frowned. It looked a bit off on the boy glaring back. Not made for frowning? He didn't feel like he was a serious person. So far, smiles had felt the most natural expression for him. He grinned at the face in the glass. It felt good and comfortable. He must be a smiley person.

"A smile suits you best," said a voice behind Naruto. Iruka appeared in the mirror behind him, standing close to him so that he could feel his breath in his hair. He said nothing and watched Iruka watching him. Suddenly he felt very lonely, even when the man was so near. Who was he? Who did everyone expect him to be? They all knew so much more about his character than he did. It made his stomach churn. The feeling must have shown on his face because Iruka lifted his hand and settled it on his shoulder.

"I know its scary now. I know it's hard. But it'll get better. I promise," he said softly and curled his lips into a sad, lopsided smile.

"We want to give you a look over now." His hand shifted to his back and gave him a gentle push.

"Come this way, Naruto."

That name still sounded weird.

When Naruto entered the room there was another person in the room. An old man in long white and red robes with a wide brimmed 'hat'. Great. Another one. Someone else's name to add to the list. Naruto waited but no one said anything about the new man's presence. Didn't anyone feel the need to tell him who these people were and what was going on? It was mildly frustrating to the blonde. But he was too scared to say anything and tried not to show it in his blank expression because there was something about the two nameless people; the blonde woman and the old man, and the way held themselves that made them seem unquestionable. A distinct look of superiority about them. The man's sort of kindly, the woman's slightly cooler with a sharp edge to her despite her beauty.

The woman beckoned him forward, sighing loudly. Naruto stepped forward nervously and she lowered herself onto her haunches to look up at him. Slowly, she slipped her hand to the waistband of his pajama pants and lifted his shirt. He shivered but it was ok because she was a doctor. Probably. No one had actually properly introduced her. She frowned at his exposed stomach and Naruto dipped his chin to look too.

"Woah! What is that!" His blue eyes widened as they locked onto the large spiral that dominated most of his abdomen.

"What! What! A tattoo?" Naruto stepped away from the woman, bending over further to get a better look, his fingers scurrying the shirt higher and higher up his body until it was bunched around his chin, in case there were any other surprises he should know about his own body. There was nothing. The sunny skin was flawless; unmarred and perfect. Naruto lowered his eyes back to the mark, trailing his eyes over the bumps and faint outlines of his hardened stomach muscles beneath it. It was amazing; this thing that he couldn't remember getting. A vivid red, mess of a twirly tattoo. Had it hurt when he got it? Why was it of interest to the medic? Either way, it was pretty cool looking. The boy whistled as he breathed in, straining his neck this way and that to get a better look at the little squiggles scattered around the outer ring of the swirl.

"What is this thing? When did I get this?" Naruto asked, not taking his eyes of it. It was rather mesmerizing really, making him dizzy. The lady doctor hissed a little in frustration and reached for him, steering him back by his hips to stand in front of her; ignoring his question.

"No scar tissue, everything seems to have healed and _it _seems to be under control again. The colour is brighter now because of when it 'healed' right?"

Naruto frowned. He had been hurt? That would explain the hospital, but what on earth was '_it_'? And why had she said "healed" like that wasn't really what had happened?

"Honestly Sensei. You really should have called me earlier," complained the woman, rising to her full height, not addressing her patient at all as she turned to the old man. A small, almost nervous chuckle sounded from the red and white robed figure and he lifted his head and smiled. Naruto wished someone would tell him who they were.

"Well, no one really knew about it until it happened. We we're all very unprepared and besides-" began the old man but was cut off when a new voice finished the sentence.

"-You were a little way out and a tad hard to find, Tsunade." Every pair of eyes turned and Naruto closed his eyes against the desire to sigh as a new character made his presence known.

A man, young or old; Naruto couldn't tell, with masses of long white hair growing in unruly thick spikes, crouched easily in the window frame, a cheeky, boyish grin in full bloom lighting his face.

"Jiraiya," replied the woman; 'Tsunade', evenly although Naruto noticed a new expression on her face that he assumed was masked surprise.

"I didn't know you were still around Jiraiya," said the old man in a comfortable tone, unconsciously moving to close off everyone else in the room from the conversation. Obviously these three were connected. To the side, Iruka and Kakashi watched on quietly. Kakashi hadn't said anything the whole time. Was he hurting? Again?

"Come on Tsunade, you were nowhere near Konoha so don't be complaining that you weren't called in earlier on the case," laughed Jiraiya, smiling widely at the woman and bending his head to her a little, turning his face to see her expression from his perch as she whipped her head to the side and pouted; a childish action that was odd for someone with such a serious, stern air to her.  
"Naruto seems fine." Tsunade said, ignoring Jiraiya's comment and addressing Naruto by his first name.

Everyone did that...

"I'm about done here, Sensei," she said to the old man.

'_Sensei'._

The old man was a teacher of some kind and the woman was clearly his student by the way she had addressed him. What was the other man? He was older than the women no doubt, but then again… Apparently this was a ninja village; Konoha. Naruto didn't know anything about what being a ninja meant. Maybe it could alter your age or something. They were definitely intimately connected. More than mere acquaintances.

Teacher, student, student. That's what Naruto was guessing. All ninja, he decided by the odd attire of the men; just like Kakashi san.

"What are you even doing here still, you dirty pervert?"

"Come now, come now, let's not be snappy. We can talk over dinner?"

"Not a chance."

Laugh.  
Sigh.

Hmmpft.

Naruto was marvelling at the teenage antics of the group when Jiraiya spoke again, getting back to the original question questioning his presence.

"Well I was in the neighbourhood, and after my little mission to find Tsunade, I decided to stick around a little and see how it went with the kid." With that line he fixed his eyes on Naruto and for the first time, someone acknowledged he was in the room. Naruto felt himself redden a touch when the woman turned to him, stared for a moment and then looked back to Jiraiya as he leapt through the window and landed with a loud clack on the lino floor in his wooden geta. He was the tallest in the room when he stood straight, towering over Tsunade, a good head over Kakashi and Iruka.

Without warning, Jiraiya dropped down just like Tsunade and flipped up Naruto's shirt and spread his large palm over Naruto's stomach. Naruto yelped quietly at the heat from his hand.

"It seems alright," said Jiraiya casually and flicked his small eyes up to Naruto's face.

"How are you, Kid?" he asked. Naruto pressed his lips in a thin line. Everyone was just touching him on their own. He stepped back. Who was this guy? Neither Kakashi and Iruka appeared to respond to him with the ease that the oldest man and Tsunade had.

"I'm fine, I guess," he replied slowly. Iruka walked forward to stand next to him. Naruto turned his head to acknowledge him; he had picked up that Iruka liked that. Obviously they had been quite close and the space around the teacher was always warm and somewhat comforting. Well, as comforting as Naruto had felt so far.

At that moment, a silver glint caught Naruto's eye. He took three quick strides to the bed and closed his fist around the silver plate, eyes roaming the metal gently and slowly and slipping onto the blue material, gazing into the part folds of the slightly rumpled band. Everyone was watching him. There was a tense atmosphere. A thumb dipped into the end of the carved out symbol and followed it all the way to the centre. A leaf maybe? 'Konoha' meant leaf. What was this thing? Should he ask? Would the cool tingle of the metal disappear if he did? Probably. It was so impossible. Everything and everyone he felt for... The emotion disappeared too quickly. But he couldn't just stand and wonder forever.

"What is this?" he whispered. It almost sounded accusing. Like something was being kept from him. Although, what wasn't being kept from him? Everything except what had entered the hospital was being kept from him. But this was different.

No one answered.

Naruto looked up, putting on his best innocent curious face that wasn't actually that good because he hadn't had to use it much. Apart from when Uchiha Sasuke walked in.

"What is this?" he asked again. Lighter tone this time. That seemed to work. The people unhinged their shoulders from around their ears and Iruka smiled awkwardly. Sadly. Painfully. All of them in one.

"It's a forehead protector. All the ninja in the village wear them," he replied softly. Naruto gulped. All the _ninja_?

"Is it... mine?"

"..."

"Yes." It was the old man, still unintroduced, who answered.

"Hokage sama?" Iruka called him unsurely, his voice full of questions that could apparently be conveyed by only the name.

'Hokage'. This had been explained at some point.

Genin, Chuunin, Jounin, Hokage. That was right. The top ninja. The leader. Naruto stood up a little straighter as the man spoke.

"You were a ninja of this village. We can't hide that from you. Everyone knew you. But now. Its impossible." The man's voice was stern. Naruto's eyes widened.

Him... A ninja? It was incomprehensible. But with this new life. This life with no memories. Anything was possible. He didn't know himself, his home, his 'friends', his past, his future. Who was he? Who was Uzumaki Naruto and who had he been. A well known ninja? Well known for what? Skill? Was he the best? Lack of skill? Was he just some screw up? What kind of ninja had he been?

The voice inside sounded desperate. But really...

What did it matter now...? It was...

"Impossible?" he voiced; the end of the word curving into a question without him meaning it too.

"Yes." A new speaker. Tsunade. Naruto turned to her. She was looking at him straight to centre. She had such a strong gaze. He got the impression she also had a very strong kind of character. Behind her professional, doctor face she had fire. It showed in her raw umber eyes; a darker shade to match the seriousness of her tone.

"With the way your body is, it is true that out of pure natural instinct you may be able to avoid an average-strength taijutsu attack. Even if your mind doesn't recall, your body was still trained and your reflexes should still be above average since they are something you do without actual conscious thought process. You may even be able to tell the difference between a genjutsu; illusion, and reality, just because it _feels_ wrong to you; but you could never release it or turn the situation around without restarting completely as a ninja, which would be a waste of everyone's time. Therefore, impossible."

Report complete. That was that. Tsunade left no room for uncertainty, queries, doubts.

Naruto had the feeling he should have felt some sort of loss toward the blunt way his question had been responded to. But he didn't, even though he was sure the forehead protector meant something. He looked around and stopped at Kakashi and Iruka. For the first time he realized they too were wearing forehead protectors with the leaf symbol on them; Iruka's straight on and Kakashi's slumped over one of his eyes. They glinted in the sun coming through the far window where Jiraiya had crouched. Something special. Maybe.

Naruto looked down, urging himself to try and form a tie to the object in his palm. He turned it over in hands, fingering the tiny scratches in the shiny metal, the subtly ragged edges at the ends of the band where it had been knotted. There was no feeling. But a want to have one.

"Can I keep it?" he asked quietly. Summer sky eyes raised and watched through light eyelashes. Waiting.

"You're not a ninja anymore. So no. Impossible," replied Tsunade, a hint of sadness in her voice that followed through into everyone's eyes as they watched him absorb the new information.

Naruto furrowed his eyebrows into a sadden frown with no emotion behind it. It had disappeared too, just as he had predicted. Right after she said:  
_"Impossible."_


	17. Chapter 17

_ffnet officially hates me. I had this done a while ago but then this stupid site decided it wouldn't let me see the drop down menu on either of my computers so I couldn't get to the document manager to publish it. My deepest apologies T^T Anyway, its nearly Christmas so I'm rather busy and I'm going away afterwards too so I don't know when the next chapter will be up but I'll try to write it while I'm away on actual paper, with an actual pen O_O For now, Enjoy!_

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Sasuke stood in front of the small chair in the corner, staying completely still so he didn't open anymore of his wounds. He had run all the way home yesterday after the incident at the hospital with Sakura and torn open one of the cuts on his shoulder with the motion of his arms. He'd bleed everywhere. Not that he cared; the house was already bloodstained. It always would be. Some with visible colour wouldn't hurt.

It was nearly evening and Sasuke had done nothing but stay in bed the whole day. But now he was up. Now he was here. On the chair was Naruto's bright orange kimono, folded messily with his geta placed on top; unmoved since the night of the festival when Naruto had put them there. Sasuke gazed at them through tired, half lidded eyes. His mind flooded with warm, watery memories of that time.

Naruto's collar bone brushing his fingertips as he pulled the kimono neck neatly closed.

The warmth of having him so near as Sasuke dressed him awkwardly...

Sasuke's arms around the other boy as he wound the obi round his middle...

The smell of him, sunny and soft...

How they stood quietly afterwards, watching for a long moment before speaking...

"_D-does it look good?"_

"_Y-yeah, it does..." _

Sasuke blinked and his mind returned to the hospital.

He had only ever felt completely defenceless once and he swore no one would make him cry, that no one would reduce him to that ever again. But as he stood in that hospital room, all his walls had been shattered. Only habit and the last shred of will power he still had had kept Sasuke's face expressionless. There had been no boundaries for his emotions then and there were none now for his memories. He didn't want to think of it. But he couldn't help it.

Naruto's eyes.

His voice.

Just the way he stood.

It all seemed so wrong.

His name had been the worst. It had thrown Sasuke the much.

"Uchiha san". No one had ever called him that. It was just a name, just a title, a word. But with that one word, emotions no term in even the widest vocabulary could convey flooded Sasuke's shocked, still body.

'Sasuke'. It could be said so many ways. And Sasuke knew all Naruto's ones. With just his name he could read the blonde like an open book, knew what he was feeling, what he wanted...

Sasuke was sure there was no worse feeling, nothing as cold as being called "Uchiha san". 'Uchiha' because Naruto didn't understand or know the person called 'Sasuke'. The 'san' suffix for a politeness that had never been there for them. It was so painful.

What would he do? This kind of unsettledness scared Sasuke. It was the kind that only fit a temporary situation, like butterflies before a test. But this wasn't temporary. Sasuke knew. Everyone knew. This was forever. The Uzumaki Naruto he knew would never be the same; would never remember _everything_ that had happened for them…

He wouldn't remember fighting in the academy, training together, going on missions or protecting each other with all they had. He wouldn't know everything that was so important. All the littlest things that always seemed so big to the two of them were gone. The fights, the bruises, the blood, the tears. The little dock at the lake, Team 7's bridge, the cage of ice, the stars, this house, this room... Was he even Naruto anymore? That boy who had stood there...

Sasuke didn't know. All he wanted was _their_ Naruto, _his_ Naruto back. He wanted Naruto who called him 'Teme'. The one with the flashing blue-fire eyes. The one with the arrogant air to him when he was annoyed, a childish one when he wasn't. Not the one who called him 'Uchiha san'. Not the boy with the steady blues or the unsure presence.

Everything would be so forced now. Naruto had always just done whatever he wanted without thinking, said whatever he liked before ordering things in his head. The new Naruto had been to quiet and seemed to think too much. What would happen to them now? To Sasuke, Sakura, Kakashi and _Naruto_?

"Sasuke." The boy's head snapped to the window to find Kakashi standing in front of it, a hand on his hip. Of course _he_ knew where he lived...

"Sasuke," he called him again. Sasuke frowned.

"Shouldn't you be with Naruto?"

"Iruka is there now."  
"Oh..."

Silence. Kakashi shifted his weight to his other leg and stared at the wall to his left.

"Sasuke. Tomorrow can you come to get Naruto? He's being discharged," asked the jounin carefully, not meeting Sasuke's eyes, not even turning his face to the boy.

"Why does it need to be me?" snapped Sasuke. It was too soon to see Naruto again.

"He asked for you to be the one to take him home," replied Kakashi flatly. Sasuke's heart jumped.

"Sasuke?"

A sour mix of anger and grief slid under the boy's tongue.

"Who did he ask for?" murmured Sasuke, bowing his head. He waited, feeling the older male's confusion.

"...You. We asked who should take him home and he said you. I just said that."

"No. _Who _did he ask for?" snarled Sasuke, clenching his fists and still not raising his eyes from the floor. He didn't know why he was asking. He knew the answer and the reply didn't change anything at all. Completely pointless. Kakashi tensed. Sasuke could see the man's torso straighten through his dark fringe.

"Uchiha san." It hurt more than he expected, even though it was only coming from Kakashi. "He asked for 'Uchiha san'."

"That's what I thought," muttered Sasuke as Kakashi started toward the way he came in.

"Come get him tomorrow, ne Sasuke?" he said with one foot on the window sill.

"I won't..."

"Come on Sasuke. Don't be difficult."

A knot slipped in the Uchiha's chest. Heat rushed all the way to his fingertips.

"Why should I? He doesn't even know who I am!" Sasuke looked up, his dark eyes bright with misplaced fury towards the jounin's request. Kakashi blinked at him.

"Do _you_ even know who you are right now Sasuke?"

"Get out."

The man just sighed and Sasuke took a menacing step forward. Kakashi disappeared through out the window.

…

The fast wind against his face felt good as he headed for home, leaping silently from rooftop to rooftop. But it didn't slow his still quick heartbeat. Kakashi came to a stop, his ninja sandals slipped a little on the roof tiles.

Sasuke had always been an angry child and it was understandable but even he, his teacher who knew just how to push his buttons and had on numerous occasions during training, had never the amount of pure anger that had lit Sasuke's eyes just now. The boy was barely recognizable. So hurt that he didn't know what to do with himself. So hurt he couldn't control the output emotion his pain took on. It was horrible to watch such a strong person, the stability of the team, coming apart.

It was hard to say what would happen. Kakashi, of course would be fine. He always was. And Sakura was the safe harbor, the one at the back. She may not be fine, but she wouldn't break. She would cry, but she would always get herself together because she was the big sister. She had grown strong, maybe the strongest of the three. It was Sakura that let them lean on her, let them protect her and grow. She let them stand on her shoulders while they reached for the impossible. Standing in the middle, she held the other's hands in hers, a link, the connection. But could she keep them together now? Sasuke was being so angry. Would he come tomorrow? And Naruto seemed so out of reach, even to Kakashi he was very far away. Naruto laughed the same, smiled the same and only small things were different. But he was still distant from the person he used to be, and Sasuke could see that the best. He was seeing the future; the hardship that awaited them, how excruciating life was going to be. And he was losing hope; becoming angry that he couldn't control what was happening.

Taking a deep breath and standing still atop the house the man watched the sun melt into the horizon. Another day was ending and it was moments like these that Kakashi felt like he had lived too long already. His life had been long and he had gone through so much pain he couldn't remember how to even feel sorry for himself anymore. Another day was ending and Naruto's new life was just beginning.

Was Sasuke feeling the same?

"I've had enough pain to last a lifetime. Ending now is fine," The jounin muttered to the sun. The last rays of sun melted into the twilight like smoke and Kakashi stood waiting. Nothing happened, although he hadn't expected anything. He smiled from under his mask. A soft wind stirred the trees nearby.

"And the world spins madly on..."

…

It was dark but she didn't mind. The air was cool and somewhat comforting. She sat on a bench at the small park near the hospital staring at the space between her feet, listening to the silence. She fingered the hem of her big sweatshirt that clashed unattractively with red tags sticking out from her ninja attire, but there was no one else around so she didn't care. It was peacefully quiet, the concrete a dusty blue with the light of the moon.

Sakura couldn't believe what was happening. Iruka and Kakashi were so casual about the whole situation that the enormity of what had happened in the last week or so hadn't quite registered until yesterday. She had been horrified and worried when both of her teammates had been in the hospital but after their teacher had taken away Naruto's memories everything got calmer and it was like the next time she saw them everything would be fine. Like since Naruto was calm now they didn't have to worry anymore. But it wasn't like that. This was terrible. The absolute worst thing she could possibly imagine. Worse than death she decided, although she hadn't dared to imagine that far.

"What are we going to do?" she whispered. Not only had all of Team 7's lives been drastically altered, but she also vaguely wondered how their ninja lives would get past this. Teams were always in threes. When she thought of it she couldn't even hear just 'Team Kakashi: Uchiha Sasuke and Haruno Sakura". It was so... incomplete.'

"What on earth are we going to do...?" She shook a hair that had strayed from her messy ponytail off her forehead.

At that moment the bushes to her right began to rustle. Sakura was instantly on her guard, getting to her feet.

"Who's there?" she called and grimaced when her voice wavered with built up emotion. She pushed her sweatshirt sleeves up, hand at her holster.

"1996, 1997, 1998..." Was the reply that she got and suddenly a pair of legs appeared above the line of bushes. Sakura dropped her guard and tilted her head at the sight of bright orange leg warmers. Hadn't she seen them before? A second later the rest of the leg's body pushed its way through and the counting reached 2000.

The two teens stared at each other. The boy blinked up at her from his hand stand position.

"Sakura san?"  
"Lee san?"

Lee blinked again and righted himself. She lifted her chin to look at him.

"What are you doing out here Sakura san? It's night time."

"I-I could ask you the same question."

"I'm training. If I can not do 2000 steps on my hands I have to do 4000 push ups." He grinned and Sakura laughed nervously.

"Isn't that a bit extreme?" she asked. He just smiled back.

"What are you doing here?" he asked again, smile still in place; safe and reassuring in a strange way. A warmth that she shouldn't have from a near stranger spread across her body. Sakura sat back down.

"I'm just thinking..." she replied slowly.

"If I may, about what?" he inquired politely and she looked up to meet his eyes. He was wearing a soft smile and watching her gently, standing with his hands behind his back, body slightly bent to her. Sakura felt tears start in her eyes, moved by the genuine kindness that his smile held. Spotting her tears his expression quickly turned to panic and he backed away anxiously.

"I'm sorry. We barely know each other and I asked something so direct. I'm very sorry Sakura san!" He flushed red in the blue gloom and Sakura nearly laughed. Direct? Hadn't "I love you" last time been about as direct as anyone ever got? Why so shy now? He was quite amusing.

"No. Its nothing like that," she said and sniffed. He relaxed and smiled again. She smiled too. There was something about him. She hadn't imagined it the last time they had met after all.

"Can I sit?"

"Please do."

"You don't have to be so polite Sakura san," he said as he sat down next to her, moving with an unexpected grace. She blushed when he caught her watching him.  
"Neither do you. I'm younger than you so you don't need to use 'san'," she replied, feeling shy all of a sudden. She didn't meet Lee's eyes out of embarrassment but she could feel him staring at her.

"Then... Sakura... chan." Her skin prickled. Then, a pain erupted in her chest.

"_Sakura chan!"_

"_Sakura chan."  
"Sakura chaaaan!"  
"Sakura chan..."_

Naruto's blue eyes pierced her memory with unbelievable sharpness.

"Maybe not..." Sakura whispered, her voice was so quiet she wasn't sure Lee had heard her. She leaned forward to hide her face as tears began to roll over her cheeks.

Crying again... How pathetic... When would she ever run out...? And in front of Lee too...

"I heard," said Lee slowly. "About Naruto kun. That's why you're sad, Sakura san?"

So everyone knew...

"Yes..."

"I wish I could say something apart from I'm sorry but... I really am. I can't imagine it. "

"It's ok..."

"Can I do anything?"

"Not really... Nothing can be done now."

They sat in silence for a while and Sakura's tears turned cold on her face.

"Sakura san. From what I can gather, Sasuke san and Naruto kun are both very troubled people. Sasuke san more so now... But I believe that..."

Lee turned to her and she looked up to him. He grinned.

"As long as they have you everything will somehow be fine!" Lee gave her the thumbs up and Sakura's eyes widened. Lee was smiling so sincerely, she almost believed it.

But not quite.

"How do you know that? We've only spoken once... I'm actually completely useless and-" she started.

"That's not true!" Lee cut her off aggressively and she was slightly taken back at his now serious face. Bright round eyes stared at her fiercely until she dropped her head in defeat.

"Why do you think that?" she asked weakly. Truly, she couldn't think of a way that having her would help the situation, Sasuke or Naruto. It wasn't possible.

"Because Sakura san is an amazing person! So you'll be able to help fix things. I believe that completely..."

She lifted her messy tear stained face to him. Even after seeing the worst side of her; the pathetic, cry baby side, how could he still say such nice things to her with such a truthful look in his eyes?

"Lee san..."

This boy... Was amazing. The power of his words... He was so honest it was impossible not to get caught up in his tone, in his smile. He was strange looking on the outside and the things he said and did were a bit goofy, but he moved with a delicate grace, walked with a slight bounce. The light from him was enchantingly pure. He was beautiful and heartbreakingly kind. And even though Sakura hadn't even said anything, hadn't told him exactly what was on her mind; how she was doubting the future and the people closest to her, he had known just what to say and how to say it. How did he know? How did he do it? How did he keep dazzling her? Sasuke was dazzling; but only at a first glance. Sasuke was tragic, so painfully tragic and beautiful no doubt, but Lee's light... What was the soothing cool that was spreading inside her? Hope?

Incredible. He was an incredible person.

She wasn't the amazing one.

He was.

"Can I walk you home Sakura san? If you stay out here much longer you might catch a cold," Lee asked kindly. Sakura nodded and blushed as she stood.

"Are you alright now?"

"Yeah..."  
"I'm glad."

She smiled, clutching her cold hands at her chest.

"Thanks"

…

They stood at her doorstep. The night had progressed further than Sakura had realized and her parents were already asleep. Not that they would have known to wait up for her; she had snuck out her window and locked the door to her room. She hadn't been able to breathe inside the house.

"Well. I hope you do feel better, Sakura san."

"And I hope the rest of your training goes well."

Awkward silence. Sakura examined how small her hands inside the thick, baggy sleeves of her sweatshirt. Her hideously clashing sweatshirt that Lee hadn't seemed to have noticed.

"I wonder..." started Lee. She made a small noise of surprise and he smiled before continuing. He appeared very comfortable being with her.

"I wonder... if it would be out of line to say this while you are so concerned but it might make you feel better... or worse, hearing it from me." He met her eyes, his face as blank as she had ever seen it. His cheeks were slightly pink with the cold air.

"You're really very beautiful Sakura san."

The girl's heart jumped up and she got butterflies when he said her name. Lee grinned nervously when she couldn't answer.

"Sorry. I startled you after all. It was very out of line at this time. Take care, Sakura san."

He turned heel and jogged off into the night.

"_Beautiful..."_

She blinked and then smiled after his slim figure, blurry in the distance.

"_You're really very beautiful..."_

"I feel it, Lee san..." she murmured.

Even with her baggy sweatshirt, messy ponytail and swollen crying eyes, she really felt it.

Thank you. Really, thank you.


	18. Chapter 18

_I am in fact, alive. Went on a trip that was pretty alright except the no-civilazationnessness and no computer thing was gaytarded *shakes head* Anyway, chapter 18! I'm amazed at how far this thing has come! Its freaked me out ever time I've published a chapter with the number over like. 5._

_Sorry it took forever! Thanks for reading. Reviews would be most welcome ^_^_

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"Before I go in, tell me one thing. If you don't, I'm never going to see him again." Sasuke's voice was even, his eyes still and steady. A threat. A threat he knew couldn't follow through on, but a threat all the same.

He and Kakashi stood outside of Naruto's hospital door facing each other. There was a tight silence while the boy let his request hang in the air. Kakashi nodded, watching him closely, his dark eye roaming the other's young face, making him a little uncomfortable. Sasuke pulled his gaze away but his eyes found their way back to the jounin's face again as he opened his mouth to speak again.

"Is there any way to reverse Naruto's memory loss?" Sasuke asked, trying not to twist his face into an anxious frown, trying to hide the way his stomach was churning.

"Sasuke..."

"I don't want any of that padding, just tell me. Yes or no, Kakashi?" Fists at both male's sides.

"Yes."

"How?" Voice nearly calm, a touch of desperation. Sasuke's reply was too quick. Kakashi noticed and sighed. Sasuke begged him silently to tell him. It was the only chance.

"The jutsu I used on him forces the mind itself to suppress all the memories. If forced to, it can also open up again and let the memories out."

"I see," said Sasuke slowly, his fingers trembled against his palm as he uncurled his fingers slightly. "So the memories aren't gone. Just... not accessible. I'd just have to find something strong enough to break the jutsu right?" Sasuke hated the note of nervous excitement in his voice that made him sound like a child, like a child who didn't understand the situation. But he did. He understood so well and that's why he had to find it, the way to bring Naruto back.

"Something like that. But Sasuke..." Kakashi fixed his stare on the boy, bringing the force of extreme caution down on Sasuke in his tone. "Naruto hasn't had the best life. All those memories coming back at once would be enough to break him. If you're even considering trying to do this, you need to be really careful. He could be in so much pain if he remembers it all in one go that he may just decide to stop breathing or Kyuubi could be released. If that happens you'll die. Everyone will. Are you really risking your life, the lives of so many people, for what you had?" Sasuke merely smirked, turning the idea of regaining Naruto's memories over in his head. Who better to do it than him?

"Risking Naruto's chance at being happy?" said Kakashi. Sasuke faltered. "Sasuke. What if you can't get him back? You'll only hurt yourself, you know how strong Naruto's will is."  
"_was_," corrected Sasuke. Yes, _was_. And because of that '_was_' he had to do it. '_Was_'; a past tense participle that Sasuke couldn't handle, refused to accept, that made the distinction between who Naruto was then and who he had woken up as.

Sasuke breathed deep and met Kakashi's eye.

"I'll do it in small parts, I'll be gentle and he definitely won't break. But he _will_ come back; I don't care about this 'chance at happiness'. I've already decided," Sasuke said with the familiar confidence that had evaded him since the festival night. Kakashi rubbed his bottom lip with the pad of his thumb through his mask, closing his eye and tilting his head back.

"That's really selfish Sasuke," he replied exasperatedly. Sasuke just continued to smirk.

"What about your other goal in life?" The smirk on Sasuke's face fell straight to the floor.

"...He can wait." Kakashi pulled his head forward until his eye levelled with Sasuke's again.

"Until you have Naruto back?"  
"Yes."  
"Why?" The question was accusing.  
"... Our team isn't going anywhere without another member... that's all."

"Really?" The playful tone was back in Kakashi's voice, implying something more and Sasuke nearly frowned but then the man would know it was true. He kept his expression blank, his mask slipping easily over features as he considered his mentor. Either he had faith that Sasuke would be careful with Naruto or his attention span was much shorter than expected. It was always hard to tell anything with Kakashi. He was so cut up over the Naruto predicament and now he seemed fine. Maybe he was hiding it away and letting Sakura and even Sasuke cry enough for all three of them. In any case Sasuke allowed the teasing to slide.

"Lets go in," said Kakashi, moving aside to let Sasuke through first.

"Hn."

They slid the door open.

…

The hospital room was clinically white and Naruto, Iruka and another man who Sasuke didn't know were inside. The stranger was holding Naruto upside down by his ankles while the blonde laughed wildly.

"Jiraiya sama..." said Iruka uneasily and then shot a concerned glance in Kakashi's direction. From behind, Sasuke felt the other man smile in reply and Iruka's face fell in defeat. Kakashi offered no help and made no comment even as 'Jiraiya' began to swing Naruto back and forth, side to side, Naruto begging half heartedly to be let down through his mad giggles and childish grin of delight. Sasuke felt a pang of something at the sight of that wide smile. It took him a while to realize it was longing. Sasuke almost stuck his tongue out in the face of an emotion so pathetic.

"Lighten up Iruka!" Smiled Jiraiya, throwing Naruto high into the air, roughly catching him under the arms and then setting him down.

"The kid has no childhood, its fine to just play sometimes." Sasuke noticed how the man; Jiraiya, said "has no childhood" rather than "can't remember his childhood". He must be familiar with Naruto's story. The young Uchiha narrowed his eyes and searched the man for a Konoha forehead protector as he was lectured by the academy teacher about the possibility of Naruto's quick reactions not kicking in if he were dropped, but found none. Kakashi bent to his ear.

"He's Jiraiya, one of the three legendary sannin from Konoha," he murmured and Sasuke tried not to be impressed by the title. They listened to Iruka rant a bit longer. He really was quite protective of Naruto. But it was good; he was looking out for him.

"Sasuke." Kakashi's breath tickled his ear and he grunted uncomfortably, making it pass as a response

"Hn?"

"Don't look so sour. He won't trust you to take him places and tell him things to jog his memory if you're not even friends you know." Sasuke scowled and looked down. Friends..

"And how do I do that?"

"How about smiling a little?" The Uchiha was silent and Kakashi chuckled, laughing at his discomfort at the thought of being 'friendly' to Naruto when all they ever did was fight. There were always names and mock put downs even on a good day.

"I didn't have to before."

"This is different Sasuke. Team 7 might be off missions for a while until Hokage sama decides what to do with us, maybe even longer if you're seriously going to take on trying to get Naruto back, provided the Hokage approves, so you may have quite a bit of free time on your hands. Sometimes..." The man tugged Sasuke's hair from the back, making him raise his head to where Naruto, who still hadn't noticed them was trying to get Jiraiya to pick him up again. How young he looks, thought Sasuke.

"... its fine to just play," finished Kakashi.

"Alright! Uzumaki Naruto, discharging today!" The door opened and the blonde woman from the first visit entered. Sasuke and Kakashi made way as she clicked in her heels to the centre of the room.

"Baachan!" cried Naruto and everyone but Jiraiya blinked.

"Baa... chan...?"repeated the woman slowly.

"Tsunade sama, Sannin number two," muttered Kakashi under his breath.

"Jiraiya sama told me his age and that you're actually as old as he is!" said Naruto, his lips stretching into a Cheshire grin.

"Tsunade sama..."soothed Iruka. Tsunade shook her head once and muttered something before lifting her head and taking a breath.

"Did he tell you about he's actually nothing but a dirty pervert hermit, Naruto?" she asked, a pleasant smile gracing her thin lips and Sasuke, still unnoticed, flinched at the similarity it had to Sakura's smiling glare. Not that he'd ever felt the full force of it. Naruto of course missed that and instead widened his eyes at the comment. Triumph was spreading across Tsunade's face as she went on.

"If you're calling me _that_ call _him_ pervy Naruto, go on."

"Ero Sennin," conformed Naruto bluntly, turning to the white haired man, all awe stripped from his face. "I can't believe you're really just an old pervert." Kakashi, Iruka and Jiraiya all brought their palms to their foreheads and Iruka murmured something like "don't teach him things like that" as if Naruto were a small child or an untrained puppy.

"Anyway, enough of that!" Tsunade said clapping her hands together and then taking Naruto by the shoulders, steering him to face her. "Any pain at all? Discomfort?" She didn't wait for answers and lifted the blonde's shirt, her crème burlee eyes sharp and quick. She fingered the patch of skin where Naruto's tattoo that had disappeared overnight should have been. Tsunade turned to Kakashi.

"It only shows when there's been recent activity?" she asked, not unsurely, just making sure. Kakashi confirmed with a curt nod.

"So we probably won't see it again?"

"Probably not." Naruto's face fell a little at the news that his tattoo would not be making an appearance any time soon and then twisted his face around to the window, complaining quietly to himself about his body being too weird.

"So you don't feel strange at all Naruto?" asked Tsunade.

"Nope," Naruto replied, popping the 'p' and moving his body away and into a position where he finally spotted Sasuke amongst the small crowd of "familiar" faces. The blonde waved and grinned as Tsunade took his temperature to be safe. Sasuke offered a half smile in return, the corner of his mouth quirking awkwardly but Naruto seemed happy with it because his smile grew bolder and he flushed a healthy pink. Sasuke moved his jaw back to bite his lip but stopped halfway.

"_if you're not even friends..."_

He and Naruto had been rivals first, then teammates, then bestfriends and more recently something that resembled a pair of individuals who happened to be the object of each others 'affection'. If that's what it was called between two who fought so constantly, who disagreed on a regular basis. They had formed their feelings for one another through hate. Hate and love grew very close to each other for them; it brought them to where they _were_. But love is never far from danger. That had brought them to the present situation.

"_if you're not even friends..."_

Rivals to companions of a different kind. Hate to love. Could they do it the normal way? This thing called friendship?

Doubt was making its way up the walls of Sasuke's throat, choking him a bit. He moved his jaw forward and sealed his lips, clenched his teeth. They had to try. _He_; Sasuke, had to try. Who better to do it, who better to be with Naruto and help him remember, who better than Uchiha Sasuke? Right?

…

Outside of the hospital, with his hands in his pockets the dark haired boy watched the other walk in front of him with his arms spread out.

"It's so nice to be outside!" said Naruto, pivoting on one foot to face Sasuke and walking backwards long enough to flash a grin. A grin to show Sasuke he knew he was there, to acknowledge his presence, to be polite.

"I mean, Iruka san is so sticky with me and Jira- Ero Sennin is fun but he always came through the window which kinda made me wanna go out even more."

Naruto was chatty just like he always used to be but Sasuke, who knew his behaviour, his patterns that had remained the same in this case, knew. He was nervous and babbly, avoiding important topics and rambling without any real point to what he was saying. Just mindless, meaningless nothings because Naruto had never liked silences. The only acceptable silence was Team 7 silence or Sasuke and Naruto sleepy bedroom silence, tall grass silence, star gazing silence, silence from before when they knew each other. But for Naruto, silence with a stranger was something he couldn't do and that's what they were when it came down to it; strangers.

"Naruto." The blonde moved his eyes, his eyes that moved steady and smooth without skittering or flashing, to his escort.

"Want me to show you Konoha?"

A smile flourished on his sun kissed face and despite Sasuke's feeling that this was a new person, the warmth behind it knocked him breathless. Without restraint he thought, it's not fair that I'm the only one who feels this way. He didn't like the thought very much and tried to dismiss it but it came again when Naruto said, "Thanks."

"No problem," Sasuke replied softly. They walked a bit. Three seconds Sasuke counted before he took a deep breath.

"And Naruto?" Voice rising as he steeled himself.

"Yes?" Polite "yes", not "yeah". It was hard not to notice everything.

"Sasuke is fine."

Blink, blink, and then a small smile.

"Sasuke san?" Still 'san', still strangers. Another half smile thrown uneasily as an offering.

"I guess."

…

Sasuke took Naruto all around the village pointing out everything of interest and everything not of interest because Naruto wanted to see everything and know everything about his home. Sasuke hadn't talked so much about that many trivial things in a long time. The tour took forever. By the time they were done with just the central village part it was past lunchtime and well into the afternoon. Sasuke was tired but the heavy late day sun didn't seem to make Naruto sluggish at all. Still way too much energy for his own good.

Sasuke then he took him to the further out parts of Konoha, training grounds and such. At the mountain where the Hokage's faces were carved Sasuke stood and gazed at it. Naruto asked if before he lost his memories if he had liked this place. Sasuke said no even though Naruto must have liked that mountain side a lot. The place where his stupid, Usuratonkachi face would have been carved one day if Naruto had his way, if he had got his dream. But not anymore. No said Sasuke, not really.

Coming back into the heart of the ever busy village Sasuke sensed two people heading their way. Someone called Naruto's name and both boys stopped to wait for whoever was seeking out the blonde.

"Naruto wait up!" Inuzuka Kiba was eagerly making his way through the crowd with Hyuuga Hinata in tow close behind. As the approached Kiba reached out and clapped a hand onto Naruto's shoulder.

"How are you?" he asked but before Naruto could answer the slightly taller boy stepped back laughing. "Oh right! Right, you don't know who I am." He grinned unconcernedly. Naruto smiled politely but Sasuke could tell he was taken by Kiba's energy and friendly touch after spending the majority of the day with Sasuke who despite his best efforts, couldn't touch his friend or bring himself to be out of character friendly.

"Inuzuka Kiba, Konoha Genin, Team Kurenai," said Kiba proudly and inclining his hooded head slightly.

"And this, is Akamaru," he continued when his always constant pup was revealed with the bow. The small white dog, just in Sasuke's eyesight but not in Naruto's, perched atop Kiba's head yapped loudly in greeting making Naruto jump and then rise onto the balls of his feet to get closer to the noisy creature. Kiba grinned as Naruto marvelled. He then flicked his sharp canine eyes over his shoulder to Hinata who was standing near him; one step back and another in behind.

"Hyuuga Hinata, same rank, same team," Kiba said, jerking a thumb casually at the quiet girl who didn't seem to mind the gesture that Sasuke would have found somewhat rude if it had been him.

"Naruto kun, Sasuke san." She bowed her head low, shuffled her feet and blushed when Naruto looked at her.

Two new friends for Naruto. He barely even needs me, thought Sasuke as the small group moved out of the coming and goings of the street. Kiba and Naruto stood together while the Inuzuka boy told Naruto of how the two knew each other and the mischief they plus Nara Shikamaru and Akimichi Chouji had gotten into in their academy days. Hinata and Sasuke stood side by side observing Naruto revel in the details that the ones close to him hadn't been able to bring up. The blonde was a puppy, lapping up all Kiba could give. Sasuke watched them with annoying, ugly jealousy.

"Pal-y aren't they?" commented Sasuke flatly and Hinata jumped at the sound of his voice.

"Y-yes," she agreed, turning her body towards the conversation. Sasuke continued to frown darkly at Naruto and Kiba in particular, both who saw nothing.

"Why is that?" he asked her without trying to hide the bitter ring to his tone. Hinata was quiet and safe. She wouldn't judge him and with those eyes of hers...She kind of gave the impression that she saw everything. He didn't hide because she would see it anyway. A safe stranger. With her being strangers was good. They may never talk again but for now she could see and hear all and wouldn't tell. Safe.

"Why...?" Sasuke repeated.

Sensing it was a question he wanted an answer to, Hinata loosen the arms crossed over her body and opened her mouth; herself. They were safe together.

"In the academy Naruto kun and Kiba kun were friends but once we all left you kind of took over all the friendship positions. Naruto kun has no memories and I think Kiba kun might be trying to take his chance to have Naruto kun as a friend before you and him grow close again," she explained, stuttering in several places but not too badly. Sasuke was silent and Kiba and Naruto kept on talking, blissfully unaware of the cold in Sasuke's dark eyes.

"So Naruto kun doesn't remember that he likes Sakura san..." mumbled Hinata quietly, clearly not realizing she had spoken aloud. The safety shattered when she smiled a tiny smile and Sasuke read beneath it.

"_So Naruto kun doesn't remember the he likes Sakura san..."_

"_So Naruto doesn't know who he likes..."_

"_So Naruto doesn't have someone he has feelings for right now..."_

"_Who gets Naruto...?"_

Automatically Sasuke curled his fingers inward and grit his teeth.

Me. I get Naruto.

He glanced up to see Kiba with his arm over Naruto's shoulders. An innocent enough action that sent a sick wave of envy that Sasuke was unaccustomed to washing over his subtly trembling body. His thoughts were wild and raw now that the one who could always read him, the one who he now had to smile and act for wasn't watching him, knowing exactly what was on his mind. Three words had made Sasuke possessive and angry. No, not just three words, words were barely anything, just sounds without real form. Not just those three words alone. Three words and a fatal night, a fatal... kiss. He struggled for his mask, his perfect porcelain mask. Finding it just in time he took a moment to try and right himself. It wasn't happening, the world shook slightly, his hands still trembled. He took another moment, until he could be sure that it would be quiet words that would leave his mouth. His hands still trembled.

"If Naruto fell for someone before he's going to fall again. He's still Naruto," managed Sasuke bluntly. Hinata, becoming conscious of her mistake, flushed a deep shade of red and seemed to be fighting back tears of embarrassment. Sasuke nearly apologized but the he could taste blood in his mouth.

"Naruto."

The blonde turned head and when their eyes met Kiba and Hinata were gone but the hotness on the palms of Sasuke's trembling hands remained, the horrible swoon of his insides. His heart raced and then, he ran with it. He swung around and without warning ran, looking into Naruto's eyes as long as he could. To say goodbye or beckon him after him, Sasuke didn't know. He seemed to be running a lot lately. Naruto followed him and another sick angry wave crashed over Sasuke as Naruto yelled his name over and over.

"Sasuke san! Sasuke san! Sasuke san!"

Naruto chased him with the same determination he had always had and it only made Sasuke angrier, more hurt, sicker, pushed him further under the green waters.

"Sasuke san! Hey! Sasuke san! Where are you going? Sasuke san!"

That same determination. And it killed him.

They stopped breathlessly and Sasuke found himself outside of Naruto's room's building. With his hands on his knees he looked up at it. His nearly healed, nearly scarred wounds ached from his heaving back; he could feel the edges along each cut sting sharply, almost see their placement on his back in his mind.

Naruto's house... That little mini home up there... Where it all happened. It seemed like a lifetime ago.

"Sasuke san! What did you say to Hyuuga san? She looked like she was going to pass out any minute now!" called Naruto. Sasuke turned to look at him. He was standing a few paces away looking confused; the red from running on his face made his eyes a startling blue and his weird whiskers dark and vivid.

"Sasuke san? What's wrong. You look kind of..." He trailed off and broke eye contact.

In another world there would be no concern in the way Naruto said Sasuke's name. In another world Naruto grabbed him and shook the raven raggedly into telling him what was up. In another world Naruto called him 'Teme' and made a stupid remark to provoke him. In another world Naruto was rough and could read him. If Sasuke needed to talk about something it would be beaten out of him because he could never come out with it on his own. If Sasuke needed to just leave it, Naruto would be selfish and change the subject to himself or an insult would be thrown, leading them down a different path and just, leaving it. He just knew. They never told each other. Never asked to talk. It was a practiced habit.

In this world Naruto knew little to nothing. In this world he stood and waited. Patient. It was unnatural, infuriating.

A hot flush heightened Sasuke's senses and prickled heatedly at his shins, his neck, his palms.

"Sasuke san?"

Lines and times from when they were _Sasuke and Naruto_ clenched around Sasuke's bone white knuckles.

"Sasuke san?" Too much. The concern was too unsettling. The unhidden worry was so... wrong... so raw, like salt on an open cut, like salt on his open cuts, a pain that carried through to his chest, his laboured breath refusing to slow. It was so... not Naruto.

"Ok Sasuke san, what's with you? Really I-"

A coil inside Sasuke snapped.

He punched him. Squarely in the jaw and sent the blonde boy stumbling backwards. He punched him.

The coil unwound slowly.

Sasuke stood stock still. Deathly still. Ninja still

Shit.

He'd punched him.


	19. Chapter 19

_This chapter is dedicated to bloodyroses7 because you offered me my first bowl of ramen over the internet ;P It was delicious! Thankyou!_

_Chapter 19! What will happen next.. O_O_

_Enjoy!_

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* * *

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Six seconds. Six long seconds is how long they had stood in silence. Sasuke counted them as he stared at the ground trying to hold back an expression of guilt that was creeping around his jaw line after the cold shock had drained away. Naruto stood with his arms braced against a wall of air, fingers splayed and face turned from impact. Nothing had happened for seven seconds. Eight. Nine. Naruto moved to rub his face but the awkward silence continued. Sasuke waited for the other boy to hit him back but still nothing happened and the quiet grew pregnant with mouthy responses that should have flown from the blonde boy's surprise-parted lips.

"_Bastard!"_

"_Baka!"_

"_Teme!"_

"_Idiot!"_

All those and all the variations. But instead after eleven seconds:

"I want to go to my house now."

Sasuke nodded, the movement made his head spin after standing so still. He nodded again, slower this time and lifted a heavy arm to point up at the building. Naruto drew a loud breath through his nose but made no other comments, then started for the stairs. When the smaller boy came close as he passed he didn't knock his shoulder with Sasuke's like he did when he was angry and wanted Sasuke to know it. He didn't mutter under his breath or lift his chin to show his fierce eyes. Sandals clacked dully on the first step.

"Naruto."

"What."

"You can hit me."

"What?"  
"Hit me."

They both moved to face each other. Naruto's face was conflicted; his mouth twisted down at the corners in hurt anger, his eyes soft with confusion and the uncertainty towards Sasuke's request. Slowly, he back tracked and came to stand in front of Sasuke, their feet becoming mirror images in their blue ninja sandals. Sasuke closed his eyes and waited for contact. How hard could Naruto punch? He couldn't remember. He wanted Naruto to hit him like he always did. But even underneath that there was still the niggling part of him that picked up on everything. Naruto was doing as he was told. Sasuke tried to concentrate on their breathing. It was completely out of sync. Sasuke's was quiet and shallow, Naruto's louder and shakier.

When it came it didn't hurt but Naruto's skin on his was the same as a punch in the face and it took the dark haired boy a good few moments to realize that Naruto hadn't actually hit him. Opening his eyes he found the blonde boy with his head bowed, his eyes hidden in the shadow of his sunny fringe. His arm was stretched out and rather than a fist at Sasuke's cheek, it was merely his fingers, hot and pressing through his cheek to the teeth on the inside. Sasuke's jaw was slack. He ran his tongue lightly across the other boy's fingertips through his flesh. Naruto didn't react and didn't speak again until moved his wrist and took hold of Sasuke's cheek and tugged.

He'd done it in the past; grabbed Sasuke's face and stretched his cheeks until they hurt just to annoy him but it wasn't like that now. Naruto's head was still down.

"I don't get you Sasuke san..." he mumbled, and then more clearly, "Aren't we supposed to be friends? Best friends?" Sasuke kept his face carefully expressionless even though Naruto wasn't looking. His eyes were on the ground, averted slightly to his left. No reply. The fingers at Sasuke's cheek tightened. Pressing for an answer? Or just because? Naruto squeezed harder again.

"That hurts Dobe." As Sasuke was batting Naruto's hand away he heard what he had just said. Naruto bristled.

"What...?"

"Nothing."

"What did call me just now Sasuke san?" Deep blue was flooding into the lighter shades of the other boy's eyes, swallowing the little blue-white flecks close to the pupil.

"Nothing."

"Dobe? like... dead last?" His blonde eyebrows were pulling together; tiny little bumps flanked the bridge of his nose as he scowled angrily.

"Naruto..." Sasuke tried to give a gentler edge to his voice but Naruto didn't appreciate the soothing attempt. This time Naruto really did hit him; his fist coming in fast from the right and catching Sasuke quick and strong in the side of his chin. Unprepared, he stumbled back a little and Naruto turned on his heel and stomped up the stairs. He didn't even know which room. Naruto didn't look back. Sasuke left.

…

Konoha buzzed even in the early evening. It hurt Sasuke's head and the subtle ache in his jaw kept rhythm with his feet as he walked. He waited until it was too late to turn around before he began to replay the last half and hour or so. Kiba and Hinata... And then out at Naruto's.

He'd punched him.

Damn it.

But even worse was calling him "Dobe"; a dead last for reasons he didn't understand.

Damn it. Sasuke sighed. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it.

Already he had screwed up. But it was hard. Things Sasuke couldn't see he didn't trust. Love, bonds... They could all be ruined in a matter of seconds, in the blink of an eye. They were invisible to him and hard to find the pieces again if they broke. He didn't trust such things at all and found it hard to accept them. Even with Naruto...

"_I love you..."_

Just words.

What Sasuke did trust was Naruto's smile, his warm hands, the complete blue of his eyes when he was happy, and at the time, he had trusted Naruto's mouth moving with his. He trusted those things to tell him what he couldn't see; to make them solid; more real. But now he couldn't even trust what he could see and it made the young Uchiha feel like he wasn't in control. Inside he was barely breathing, trying to be quiet with his eyes wide open, searching and listening for something true. Naruto was now a closed book most of the time. His reactions were different, unpredictable, and unreadable; first time reactions.

No control.

Sasuke stopped and leant against a wall, falling into the dusky shadows. Nobody noticed him. He shut his eyes.

No control. It threw him off and made his own responses unstable. He was unstable. He was scared and unsettled. Everything was very, very wrong.

"... but it was ok because Sasuke kun caught Naruto by the foot." The soft sound of laughter faded in, rising above the buzz because he knew they voice and she was talking loudly to be heard. Sasuke opened his eyes, scanning the crowds until he pinned the laughter he had heard accompany Sakura's voice to a tall male a while away in a ridiculous green outfit walking beside her, smiling at her.

The guy from the kimono shop with the weird haircut.

Sasuke made them out as they moved in his direction. It was a bit like watching through a camera lens while you were taking pictures. He only saw them for a short time before someone walked in front of them.

Sakura smiling. The boy smiling.

Sakura shaking her head exasperatedly. The boy laughing softly.

Sasuke studied them, staying near the wall because he wasn't sure whether he wanted to be seen or not. Sakura was talking happily and her green eyes stood out brightly against her creamy complexion. They were much brighter than when he had last seen her. Sasuke could hear better snatches of their conversation now. She seemed to be recounting when Team 7 had learnt how to walk up trees to the boy. He remembered that. She'd been very good at it but Naruto and himself had taken longer to get the hang of it and even once they got it Naruto had still managed to fall from the tree. Stupid. Sasuke shifted his attention to the person at her side.

The bad haircut boy was listening and watching her with what Sasuke could only call a look of 'adoration' in his eyes. But Sasuke didn't linger long because in that moment his eyes jumped back to Sakura in a double take.

Her hair! Where was it? That hair she had always had!

Stepping off the wall Sasuke watched somewhat amazed as the ends of Sakura's milky pink hair, stretched out on their tip toes reached down and danced across her shoulders. Suddenly he felt very far from the Team 7's female member. She was with a boy who wasn't himself and wasn't Naruto and now she had short hair. She looked so different. Everything was changing around him. The whole world was moving and Sasuke was standing still. Alone.

"Sasuke kun!" He'd been spotted and he was still undecided about wanting to start something with the two. It kind of looked like a date, but didn't Sakura like him? Hadn't Uchiha Sasuke always been 'the one' for Haruno Sakura? It wasn't that he was concerned, it wasn't that he wanted her for himself, in fact he was pretty happy to see she was looking for someone more suitable to give all that love she had to, especially after he had discovered that he and Naruto had feelings for each other, but it still looked a little strange. Pink and green together instead of pink and blue or pink and orange or a combination of pink, blue and orange. Green was very new. New... Is that why she cut her hair? A fresh start? Or for the loss of something. The image of Sakura on her hands and knees in the hospital hallway pushed its way in front of his eyes. Sasuke hoped it was the former. He smiled the tiniest bit, deciding that talking a little with them would be ok and Sakura being Sakura saw it and smiled back, taking it as permission to come over and pointed him out to the boy next to her who made a little 'oh' with his mouth. Sasuke began to walk forward to meet them. It wasn't like he actually had to say anything much. Sakura knew his silence better than anyone.

While they were walking the green boy walked half a pace in front of Sakura and gently shouldered oncoming traffic aside for her without her even noticing. He was good to her. Sasuke was glad.

"Sasuke kun, this is Rock Lee. Lee san, this is Sasuke kun," said Sakura once they were within earshot and out of the flow of people.

"Nice to meet you, I've heard a lot," greeted Lee as he ducked his head into a bow and bent slightly at the waist. He then lifted himself to full height and smiled warmly for good measure. Sasuke nodded.

"I met Lee san on my way home from getting my hair cut." The girl bounced and beamed. Sasuke nodded again.

"I cut my hair," she said like it wasn't as plain as day. There was a pause and Sasuke realized that she was waiting for a proper response. Lee was quiet too, merely watching the team mate's limited exchange. The Uchiha sighed. His jaw hurt and he'd already said so much today, said too much today. Sakura was still waiting.

"It's good short."

Sakura smiled. Lee smiled.

"Yeah, I need to show Naruto too, even though it won't be very shocking to him." Sakura's lips lifted into a sad smile and Sasuke turned his face away guiltily at the mention of the blonde. It was then that the pale starts of a bruise on his chin were spotted by Lee who alerted Sakura with a carefully executed nudge that Sasuke saw out of the corner of his eye.

"Sasuke kun! What's that? What happened?"

"Nothing."

"Sasuke kun!" Her tone was stern and Sasuke was so surprised that the voice usually reserved for Naruto's stupidity or Kakashi's tardiness was being used directly towards him that he dropped his guard and Sakura didn't need to ask what happened again because the expression he had been trying to keep off his features, the pout that naturally came to his face after fighting with Naruto; seriously or not, surfaced before he could stop it. Sakura's shoulders slumped. Lee looked politely puzzled.

There it was again. Silence. After all that talking before everything had gone wrong and also just now, there was nothing left for Sasuke but silence. Not comfortable silence. Just tension and guilt.

"Did you hit him too?"

"..."

"Well?"

"Sakura."

"Sasuke kun."

"Hn."

"Oh, Sasuke kun." She was disappointed that he had caused trouble. Sasuke didn't like it. He didn't like the tone of her voice. Sakura had always been proud to be close to him and never blamed him; never saw his actions as bad. It was always Naruto's fault but now, with that spark in her eye, with that boy by her side, she wasn't "in love" with him anymore and it was indisputably Sasuke's fault. Naruto didn't remember and didn't know. He was innocent and Sasuke was guilty, and Sakura was disappointed in him.

"You need to apologize to him tomorrow Sasuke kun," she said evenly. Sasuke automatically raised his eyes and fixed her with a glare and she faltered, backing half a step into Lee but not for long. Sasuke watched her steel herself; prepare herself to scold the boy she had never scolded.

"When normal people fight they avoid each other afterward. He's not going to keep coming back for more like before." Her voice was quiet. There was another long pause. It wasn't even a proper telling off.

"Where is he now?"

"At home."

"Did you take him and show him everything before you decked him?"

"I didn't deck him and no."

"So you just left him." It wasn't a question.

"He didn't want to talk to me."

The girl sighed while both boys were silent.

"Sorry Lee san, I have to go," Sakura said blowing out a long breath and twisting the tip of one of her new bangs in her fingers. "See you Sasuke kun..."

"Where are you going to Sakura san?" Lee called after her as she started off in the direction that Sasuke had come from.

Maybe Sakura can fix it, thought Sasuke. Even though I screwed up. Even though Naruto probably doesn't want to see me anymore... But it's Sakura. Naruto always listened to her. Maybe he'd still listen, especially since she is more her old self at the moment, demanding and forceful. Sasuke attempted to reassure himself, trying to selfishly push away some of the responsibility.

Although towards a Naruto with no recollection of being used to Sakura's talking to's… How much could the girl fix on her own?

Sasuke's thoughts stopped short when Sakura replied.

"To Naruto," she called back. When Sasuke turned to watch her go he saw her shake her head. He shoulders were drooped. Guilt seeped through him. He had always done things by himself and looked after himself. He never troubled others or troubled with others. But somewhere along the way he'd come to depend on his team, his broken team. And now he was relying on Sakura to fix his mistake. It was a bad feeling.

"Team 7 really is something," mused Lee after a long moment. Sasuke didn't know what he meant. He stayed silent.

…

When Sakura arrived outside the shabby apartment block she spotted Naruto instantly even in the gloom. He was vivid with his orange pants and sunshine hair against the grey backdrop of the walls that spread in both directions to either side of him, an orange-yellow glow standing out against the dark of the open door in front of him. No lights were on in his house and he was standing outside of it.

Baka Sasuke kun... Look at him just standing there. Of course he doesn't know what to do. Who would? Baka...

"Naruto?" Sakura yelled from the bottom of the staircase, one foot on the first step. Naruto didn't seem to have heard her so she came up and hurried along towards where he was outside the wide open entry with a scrawly name card on the door.

_Uzumaki Naruto. _

"I'm really the only one who lives here aren't I? There's even only my name on the door. Not the family name all together. Just me..." he murmured to himself.

"Naruto? Are you ok? I saw Sasuke kun and..." Naruto started at Sasuke's name, a weak look of annoyance smeared over his face. His eyes looked like water, all shiny in the last threads of light. The girl got the feeling now was the time to drop it.

"Shall we go in?" Sakura lifted her hand and reached around Naruto to flick on the light. They both squinted and then blinked at each other.

"Haruno san?" As if he only just registered who she really was.

"Naruto." She said as easily as she could, trying not to wince.

He smiled a little.

Sakura smiled back.

Naruto coughed.

"Should I say "tadaima"?" he asked.

"Go for it," she replied without missing a beat. It was important for Naruto feel like this place was home.

"Tadaima," he said awkwardly and Sakura excused herself for intruding, just like you did when you went inside someone else's house. It was important for him to feel like this was his home, even if there was no one there.

"It smells like nothing in here." They stood in the middle of the main room. Naruto's bed was on the far side of the room. A small, kitchenette was off to the left. A cupboard and what Sakura guessed was the bathroom dominated the right side of the room; doors shut.

"Really? I think it smells like ramen. It just smells like you." She sniffed again to make sure.

"It smells like nothing to me."

"It's because you're so accustomed to your own smell." Sakura moved into the kitchen that was unexpectedly clean. Looking around, she guessed someone had cleaned the house up a bit after what happened...

"Have you eaten or anything Naruto?" she called to him as he stood before the made bed.

"It smells like the hospital here," Naruto muttered just loudly enough for her to catch it. The way he had responded to her question; by just going on without answering made her nervous. She fingered her now short bangs and laughed nervously.

"I bet it's a clean smell. I think someone has tidied up in here."

"Why would they do that?"

"Er..." Sakura busied herself with a cup ramen for Naruto and didn't reply.

"Ne, Haruno san... Do you know what happened with Sasuke san?" Sakura stopped. The kettle whistled.

"He didn't really tell me but he hit you right?"

"Yeah... But it doesn't hurt. He called me 'Dobe' too." The pink haired girl couldn't help but smile. Leaning onto the counter she looked at Naruto's back, still stood at the bed side.

I bet that was strange for you... I bet it was so very strange when it's so natural for him.

"He always calls you that you know," she said softly. The boy turned and he was Naruto on the festival night. Impossible wide eyes and young, curious. Only for a second though before he was pouting.

"I thought we were friends..."

"You are."

"Then why..."  
"Dobe, Baka, Usuratonkachi; he calls you all of those. It's kind of his thing so I wouldn't get too serious about it. His tongue probably slipped." Sakura came and stood next to Naruto and they both looked at his bed. Naruto's pajamas and that goofy night cap that he sometimes wore to breakfast on missions when they had a roof over their heads were folded neatly and set atop the pillow.

"Do I like that? Do I like him calling me that?" Naruto asked. His voice jumped up nervously. Sakura was nervous too. It was weird to be telling him these things when she had never truly understood the meaning behind the habitual exchange of bad names between the boys.

"I don't think so."

Really, she wasn't thinking that at all. Naruto probably, somewhere deep down, actually did like Sasuke's 'pet names'. It was kind of like Sasuke's claim on him. But Sakura kept that to herself.

"Ne, Naruto. Do you want to sleep some place else? It's weird here right?"

"Yeah. It smells like nothing." Naruto wrinkled his nose.  
"I'll take you to Iruka sensei's then?" The girl gathered his pajamas in her hands and passed them to him. He smiled at her, his eyes steady and Sakura nearly saw him, her eyes widening as he locked eyes with her and then quickly moved towards the exit. She nearly saw him, their baby.

"Let go now Haruno san!"

"Y-yeah."


	20. Chapter 20

_Chapter 20!~ last chapter of my holidays T^T_

_Thanks to everyone who reviews_

_Enjoy!~_

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The front door to the small house opened and Iruka found himself face to face with Haruno Sakura.

"Iruka sensei, sorry to bother you but Naruto doesn't feel comfortable in his apartment yet so I thought it was best to bring him to you," she said looking up at him. Her smile was nearly flat line. How long had she been with him? Too long? Sakura stepped up to Iruka and whispered something low so that the blonde boy couldn't hear.

"He and Sasuke kun had a fight."

Oh. The man smiled past the girl and breathed out when Naruto smiled back.

It couldn't have been too bad if he is smiling.

"Yeah ok, come in Naruto, Sakura," the man replied, ushering them in, side steeping and sweeping his arm warmly in invitation. Sakura smiled a little more and then opened her mouth to speak.

"I think I'll head home actually Iruka sensei, its getting pretty late." She moved onto the road and gave a little wave to Naruto who waved back and then bowed to the teacher.

"Bye Sakura."

"Bye Haruno san."

…

"So Naruto," Iruka said conversationally, taking the lead as they moved into his cramped living space. It was only made for one person but he had two chairs and an extra orange duvet in his closet because sometimes when he and Naruto were on good terms in the academy days Naruto used to come and sleep; especially when he had had a rough day. He was a child after all and even though he always had excuses, Iruka liked to think he was the only one Naruto would come to like that for comfort on his own free will. October 10th was the last time he had come. It was hot, rainy and Naruto's birthday.

"You can sleep in my bed and I'll take the couch if you like," the man offered as he turned to the boy. Naruto looked back at him unsurely.

"Really? The couch is fine for me." Iruka smiled at the politeness.

Like I'd let you sleep on the couch. Don't you know you always sleep in my bed?

"You can sleep in my bed," he repeated firmly.

"Ok."

…

A comfortable silence. Naruto was sitting on the couch and Iruka was in the kitchen with his apron on and the biggest bowl he had set on the counter.

"Hungry?" Naruto's stomach rumbled loudly in response. "Have you eaten today?" The teacher could feel Naruto's embarrassment but it was normal because Naruto often came on an empty stomach when he visited and Iruka always cooked for him.

"You want ramen?"

"Ramen?"

"It's your favourite," replied Iruka smoothly, already reaching for the ingredients. Even with his back to the boy he felt the air change with the new piece of knowledge and he already knew what kind of face Naruto was making from their bonding time in the hospital. From the moment when he woke up and Iruka had told him who he was and a little about his life. It was a working face; one to try and hide his confusion. One to pretend like nothing was that big of a deal.

"Ok then."

A smiled bubbled on the older male's lips. It was the same response he always got when he offered to treat Naruto at Ichiraku. The same voice and tone. After being with the boy nearly 24/7 for the past however long it had been since he had awoken (all the days had seemed to blend) Iruka had pretty much come to terms that Naruto's memories were gone and he had decided that although that threw everything off balance for a lot of the people near him, Naruto was still Naruto, he hadn't changed so much that he was new and the people who loved him still loved him. They should carry on as normal and find a new way to connect with the Naruto. Iruka had done it once and he felt like he had done it again. Everyone just needed a new way to touch the boy. Naruto wasn't a has-been; he was only just coming out. That's how Iruka looked at it. That's how Iruka was thinking of it. But even so, it was nice to have a little link back to times Naruto couldn't recall every now and again.

"So you wanna talk about what happened with Sasuke?" Iruka asked carefully as he set the big bowl of ramen in front of Naruto and sat down across the small table from him. The boy marvelled at the food for about half a second and then puffed his cheeks out into a pout, probably out of habit because he changed his expression quickly like he had just remembered something to just looking uncomfortable.

"It's ok now. Haruno san kind of talked to me about it and I guess I'm not that mad over it anymore... But he did hit me..." Naruto pouted again.

"Sasuke hitting you is nothing new," soothed Iruka. "You guys fight all the time. Physically and verbally." He stopped and pondered for a moment. "But I guess in this case, hitting a normal person, a civilian I suppose you should be called, isn't really acceptable."

"I know! He needs to learn some self control! He's such a bastard!" Naruto exploded and when he was done he blinked at Iruka and Iruka blinked back. That was unexpected. And so familiar. Familiar enough to shock him. Naruto was probably just shocked that he had said such a thing because he didn't understand how 'the same' that little outburst had sounded.

"Ah.. I mean..." A hand came up to finger the thick blonde tresses at the back of his head nervously. "I mean... its just he..." The blonde haired child stopped and looked across to his teacher and then to the table top, his hand coming down, picking up his chopsticks and rolling them between the pads of his mission calloused fingers.

"Why is he like that? I think that I'm so... different to him. We're complete opposites, how are we friends? Are we really close at all? He's so... mean," Naruto finished bluntly, mixed emotions passing through his expression. Iruka sighed gently and lent his chin on his palms, dropping his gaze to the leaping blue dolphin motif at the rim of Naruto's bowl. He took a deep breath.

"Naruto... Most ninja are not very happy people," he began and heard Naruto shift uncomfortably. He waited for a moment and then continued. It was important for the boy to hear this. Sasuke and Naruto would go nowhere without Naruto knowing what being a ninja meant and the kind of thing that being a ninja or being born into a ninja family could mean.

"Naruto," Iruka called gently, coaxing the blue eyes to his.

"People like Sasuke and Kakashi sensei... They are among the best of their league. But both I imagine aren't very happy people. They've been through a lot."

Yes, that's right. Kakashi, Sasuke, Naruto, many ninja of Konoha had been through a lot...

"Ninja grow quicker than others. In the mind they aren't really 12 or 13, they can be as old as 18. They see and feel things differently to normal people. Just being a ninja means you have to grow up quickly but Sasuke has been pushed to grow before his time for various reasons and in various ways and it's made him how he is." Iruka tiptoed around Sasuke's true issues, knowing that it was Sasuke who should tell Naruto if he wanted him to know about his family. Naruto's eyes were soft and sad. Maybe he could feel it a little; that loneliness that belonged to him and Sasuke. To Kakashi and to Iruka. To ninja from clans like the Uchiha and Hyuuga. The ones that were left alone to fend for themselves. Maybe he felt it a little right now. Maybe that would help.

"You shouldn't blame him Naruto. Even you were well advanced beyond your years and that's what everyone was used to. But you're alright now, not a ninja, and don't remember becoming one and growing up too quickly... You are... correct. We are the ones with something wrong with us but really, we aren't to blame. The way of the shinobi is very cruel..." The academy teacher's eyes dropped away.

It is cruel beyond belief and I don't know who knows that better, you or Sasuke...

There silence was long and Iruka could feel his own words seeping through him; cold and clear like icy water.

"You know, in the academy I teach at I train young ninja. In the academy I teach at, the students learn what it takes to kill and how to do it effectively before they are even teenagers..." Naruto sucked in breath sharply through his nose.

"Its not that Sasuke doesn't like you or doesn't care because he does. I know he does, everyone knows he does; its just he's shocked at how young and fragile you are. He's having a hard time understanding why you two aren't the same with each other and why you can't understand the things he does."

"I see..."

"He's trying to be gentle with you Naruto, trust me, that Sasuke you had today before things got bad? He's the gentle Sasuke and we don't see that very often. Try to be gentle with him too. It'll take some time, but don't lose him over something stupid ok?" Iruka's voice was strong on "ok?". It wasn't really a suggestion. Naruto was so very important to Sasuke. Someone he couldn't lose.

"Would it be easy to loose him?"

"Huh?"

"Could I easily loose him?"

Iruka stared for a second. Naruto looked sad and pained by the thought.

"Sasuke is the kind of person who won't intentionally let anyone get close to him so if something goes wrong I don't think he will come after you," replied the man slowly.

"How did we ever last this long as friends then?"

Iruka laughed.

"Don't use me as a reliable source, but I think you probably always came after him."

"Ah."

...

In the bedroom Naruto stood to the side while Iruka laid his orange duvet atop the bedding. He wasn't sure why. He'd always used it to make Naruto feel at home but Naruto didn't remember the duvet and probably was having difficulty wrapping his head around his fondness for the bright colour. It wasn't very 'ninja-ish'.

"Ne, Iruka san?" Naruto started nervously as he climbed into bed. "Have you ever killed someone?" The man stopped fussing over the duvet and looked up. Naruto looked away.

"Would it bother you if I had?" he asked, coming to sit on the edge of the bed where Naruto had shuffled close to the wall to make room.

"I don't know... Have you?"

"No. I have never killed someone. I find it hard to imagine going after someone with the intent to kill them just because I am ordered to. I would fight and do everything necessary to protect, but to kill on the offense doesn't seem quite right to me."

"I guess..." Naruto replied playing with one of the domes on the thick blanket. The duvet was upside down.

"Has Kakashi san ever killed anyone?" This one was more awkward. Sensing this could be another long discussion, Iruka moved to the end of the bed and sat cross legged. He felt like a kid, but he also felt more of an equal with Naruto this way.

"Kakashi san is a full fledge ninja and works under Hokage sama. It is his duty to do as he is ordered."

"So he has." It wasn't a question. Naruto looked jumpy. Thumbing the tip of his scar, Iruka watched the boy for a moment as he considered his next words. Whatever he said about Kakashi would influence Naruto's view of him. But was the boy looking for more of an explanation? His last words felt pretty final. Because he already knew.

With Kakashi it was like your eyes and your brain were having argument. In front of you is this man, tall and a bit lanky, one soft eye and moonlight silver hair. And then you are told that this man, this gentle looking man, this joking man, casual and lazy; has killed. That under his slouched forehead protector is an eye the colour of fresh blood. That he is elite. You blink your eyes thinking maybe he'll change into the image of a killer, of a ninja but he doesn't and continues to smile.

To Iruka, he was confusing and misleading and it was hard for the other man to hide how he felt about the silver haired jounin. Even how he addressed him by switching between 'sensei' and 'san' portrayed how unclear Iruka's feelings towards Kakashi were.

"Yes. He has."

"Many?"

"I would think so." A tired headache was building. Releasing his shoulder length hair from its tight ponytail, the man squirmed subtly in the quiet atmosphere of the small bedroom.

"Ne, Iruka san. Has Sasuke ever killed anyone?"

"Sasuke has never killed anyone," replied Iruka quickly.

"Have... I?" The blue in Naruto's eyes shivered in the light of the moon through the curtains that needed closing. What a thing to have to ask about yourself.

"How would you feel if you had?" Naruto wriggled.

"If it's part of orders... Neither me or Kakashi san can help it, right?" There was a certain note of helplessness in the way the boy asked for reassurance. Iruka sighed. Such a big event; his first time out of the village, his first big mission, and he didn't remember what had happened with him, Sasuke and the ice mirrors boy.

"You have never taken a life, but from what I've heard, you've gotten very close."

"What happened?"

"You, Sasuke and Sakura were on an escort mission with Kakashi san. You and Sasuke were trapped and your opponent very nearly killed Sasuke. You... were very mad..."

"...Was I strong? Was I a strong ninja?" asked Naruto. Curious this time.

A tiny chuckle in the gloom. How to word it...

"You were strong but you were reckless; always jumping in at the wrong moment. You must have scared your team half to death the way you went about things. You were a real hero." Iruka turned to the boy, smiled and reached out to ruffle his hair. Naruto closed his eyes against it, his shoulders rising. He looked very cute and incredibly young in the pajamas that Iruka had seen on the boy countless times. Not any older than thirteen, if anything a little younger. A child, a proper child.

Most of Iruka was glad.

…

The knock at the door came while Iruka was drying Naruto's ramen bowl. In the entrance way stood the Hokage having let himself in. The teacher greeted him with a small bow.

"Naruto's here?"

"Yes."

"I heard about what happened with Uchiha Sasuke."

"Me too. Who told you?"

"Sasuke."

"You went over there? To the Uchiha compound?"

"Yes."

"I don't imagine many people have been in there since..."

"No. Neither do I. Naturally he looked quite surprised to see me."

"How is he?" A thinking pause.

"Surly. Is Naruto still upset with him?"

"I don't think so."

The old man exhaled.

"Good," he murmured.

"If I may, why is that so good?" asked Iruka. The way the Hokage's 'good' had come off held more than just the relief that the two friends weren't fighting as normal.

"I talked to Sasuke and he said he want to try and get Naruto's memories back..." explained the village leader.

"What?" hissed Iruka through his teeth, trying to keep quiet for Naruto who was sleeping in the next room.

"He requested time off missions."

"He can't do that. What he wants to do is dangerous enough! But time off missions? You can't possibly think of approving what he's asking. The nine tails is sealed and Naruto is fine. We should just leave him now."

"Iruka."

"Yes?"

"Do you think Sasuke will go on without Naruto? Success isn't the same alone for someone like that boy."

Iruka was silent.

"I'm going to let him try, Iruka."

"But-"

"I don't think he can break the jutsu completely so it's safe to let him try and get something back. Something for him. It's about time that boy had something for himself don't you think?"

"Yes... Hokage sama..." Hh

After the Hokage left Iruka slipped back into the bedroom and sat by the bedside. Naruto breathed deep and comfortably. At ease. He hadn't slept like this while he was at the hospital.

So little links aren't enough for Sasuke? He really is still a child. Selfishly wanting something for himself, mused Iruka in the black of the room, now almost pitch black with the curtains finally closed.

But of course it's not like that really, he thought. Sasuke has nothing and has never asked for anything he wanted. He never tried to take and never tried to give. Maybe it was only fair they give him this chance because no matter how you tried to think of something Sasuke had fought for, the only thing was Naruto. It was only fair that after all this time Sasuke had something for himself. Something other than that big empty house at the edge of the Uchiha compound...

Iruka remembered when Sasuke had first come back to academy after the massacre. He had followed the boy home that day, worried and expecting him to break down once he was inside Uchiha territory. But he hadn't. He had passed by all the houses and shops without giving them a first glance. The teacher had wanted to follow him further but it would have felt like an invasion of privacy. Sasuke hadn't asked for him and never did ask for him. So he'd left. But now Sasuke was asking for Naruto. For a chance to have Naruto and a little something for himself. A piece of Naruto and his past, just for him.

Sighing, Iruka blinked twice slowly.

What is it about you that makes me and everyone else need to have you near Naruto? Me, Kakashi san, Sakura, Sasuke... Even the Hokage has a soft spot for you. Is it because you are... _were_ so strong against everything? Always had a smile. You were barely pitiful at all.

I hope you and Sasuke work it out...

He got to his feet and headed for the couch.

"_Do you think Sasuke will go on without Naruto? Success isn't the same alone..."_

That's right; the moon only shines with the help of the sun... Sasuke actually probably needs Naruto. It isn't Sasuke being selfish. Sasuke is wrong but it isn't really selfish. It's me being selfish. Selfish on Naruto's part... I'm really the worst. Poor Sasuke...

With an exhausted yawn Iruka flopped down on the couch. He'd almost missed sleeping on it. He was glad Naruto was near.


	21. Chapter 21

_Is this as horrific as I think it is? *sighs* I'll apologize in advance dear readers... Sorry that nothing much is happening ^_^; Gomen ne?_

_Thanks to everyone who will make it through this and actually keep waiting and reading. Sorry if i take longer to update too from here on out because I just started the new school year (ew) Homework etc is trying to eat me. I WILL make time for this because it is so much more important that homework lol ;P_

_Arigatou,_

_Douzo ^_^_

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The man breathed out loudly into the quietness of the night time, his red and white robes swishing silently as he walked slowly.

The day had been interesting to say the least. After the two boys had left, Kakashi had approached the village leader and told him about what Sasuke intended to do. They had discussed it in length inside the Hokage's office. Sasuke wanted to try and get Naruto to find his memories. He wanted to break Kakashi's jutsu.

At first the village leader's answer had been absolutely no straight away, out of the question, there was no way that he could approve such a thing. But Kakashi had pressed for Sasuke saying that jutsu was more or less unbreakable, that when he had coaxed Naruto into leaving his memories locked up in some deeper part of himself the boy had walked away with next to no convincing needed after Kakashi had been able to reach him through the power of the sharingan, and the Hokage believed him.

The Hokage believed that the jutsu was unbreakable because if there had been any room for it to come undone with only the right amount of push, Kakashi wouldn't have knelt in the caged dungeon under the hospital staring blankly as Naruto was lifted and taken upstairs like he did, there wouldn't have been that kind of expression on his well trained ninja face, he wouldn't have ripped his mask away a moment later and thrown up after he had helped lock the boy away. Kakashi wouldn't have cried like he had. He wouldn't have broken like that.

The jutsu was more or less unbreakable, Kakashi had said, with the exception of either himself or another master of the Sharingan forcing their way into Naruto's mind and taking him back to them. The exception didn't include Sasuke according to Kakashi. Sasuke had not mastered the sharingan, he couldn't break it.

The jutsu was more or less unbreakable; there was no doubt in Kakashi's mind that Sasuke wouldn't be able to break it. But, but he had said. But Sasuke can't accept that until he has tried and realized that he needs to move on; because Sasuke's tendency to have strong ties with the past made him like this and it was harder for him than anyone else.

"_Its unbreakable but he has to figure that out himself. Please Hokage sama. He can't break it. I know Sasuke. He thinks he can, he doesn't even care if he has the whole collection of memories; he just wants a part. He thinks he can get them back but really he needs to accept he can't have what is already lost. He needs to find that out himself. Let him try, let him believe, let him fail; give him the chance to move on. It's a cruel thing to just let happen but it's best for him. Please."_

When the Hokage went to Sasuke's house the boy was silent as ever. "Surly" was the word for it. Not hurt or as fragile as the old man had expected him to be. Stubborn and hard again, his walls built back up with the idea he had fixated in his head. At first Sasuke was uncooperative and refused to talk, the tiniest trace of a feeling of betrayal towards Kakashi flicking into the Uchiha boy's eyes.

"_You understand how dangerous this is? You know don't you Sasuke? You see why I hesitate?"_

And then Sasuke spoke. Just two words while wearing his carefully constructed strong face.

"_He's mine." _

The boy looked like his mother in that moment, so much so that the man had forgotten about wondering how much he should read into the dark haired boy's words. He looked so much like Uchiha Mikoto in that moment; so much like her on that one day when Sasuke's father had come back from a mission and as always Mikoto had been at the gates waiting. Young lovers. When Fugaku had collapsed she was racing to his side and gathering his exhausted body in her arms, refusing help.

"_He's mine"_ she had said, soft and concerned. Her face was completely different to her son's in another time, her son who stood before the Hokage saying the same thing but his eyes also held that protective black glint. It was the same, the same sharp, subtly possessive shade of black. He had her eyes. The village leader had never really noticed before.

Kakashi's voice had resounded in the Hokage's ears as Sasuke stood his ground in front of him, like a stubborn black cat, his eyes alight.

"_Alright Sasuke. Alright."_

Iruka had no doubt been the hardest of the three people he had had conversations over this one matter with. He hadn't discussed it much, basically just told Iruka what would be happening and relied on his position and Iruka's trust in him to make the man comply. Iruka had the best grip on the situation in the positive way, Sasuke in the negative way. Iruka connected best with Naruto and had a natural way with children. He was gentle and comfortable with comforting and didn't panic at tears the way another man might. He loved Naruto. He'd looked after him, parented him, yelled at him, treated him, been with him before anyone else had become close with him. It was his duty to be the one who understood the boy the best, who knew what was best for him, which was just to leave it. But for the Hokage it was different. Iruka was limiting himself to Naruto and looking out for only him. But for the Hokage, he had to open his eyes to everyone, including Sasuke. It was _his job_ to listen to the voices of the villages. That was why he couldn't let Iruka convince him out of it. Everything was going to be fine and Kakashi had assured him that he would keep an eye on Sasuke's mission in between his own solo missions.

Now that Team 7 was off missions Kakashi would probably be back on high priority missions for a while with some of the other jounin. Any other ninja and the Hokage may have hesitated. But this was Kakashi so he'd be fine. High priority missions are probably the best option for him, thought the Hokage as he approached his tower. There aren't many of that kind of mission so that allows him time to be in the village with the boys but they are fast paced and long. It'll keep his mind off things. Kakashi has said he'd rather not be idle too.

The old man stood in front of wooden door, his hand reaching in a smooth movement for the handle. He paused for just a moment to listen to the silence of the darkness.

As Hokage he had to open his eyes to everyone and hear all the voices of the village. Kakashi's, Sasuke's, Iruka's. That was the duty of the Hokage. The door opened without a noise. The night was silent.

…

When Naruto awoke the room was dim and something was cooking in the next room. Breakfast?

It was. A delicious traditional breakfast made by Iruka who after watching Naruto wolf down his breakfast, smiled and sent him off with lunch for the day.

"You should find Sasuke and try again," he said and pointed Naruto in the direction of the training ground that Team 7 usually used. Sasuke may be there. And if he wasn't Naruto should come back. Those were Iruka's instructions.

Out in the sun Naruto walked slowly, trying to keep on track with the way that he'd been pointed toward. There were people everywhere and he was all alone. It was very overwhelming, like there wasn't enough room for everyone to breathe but no one else seemed to notice. Naruto tried to keep the dull fear in his stomach off his face.

"...suke"

The blonde's attention was drawn to a side street as a snippet of a conversation reached him.

"...me on Sa..." Just snippets but that was Kakashi san's voice right? Naruto shouldered his way out of the middle of the road and peeked around the corner.

Kakashi and Sasuke were standing in the deserted street. The jounin was standing with his hands on his hips; Sasuke was looking stubborn, his hands gripping the bottom of his strange high collared blue shirt. Naruto noticed he was wearing his forehead protector. He hadn't seen it on him before.

"Come on Sasuke, just take it off and show me. It's just me."

The scowling youth glared up at the man darkly and turned his body away but said nothing. Kakashi grabbed his wrists and yanked his fingers away from the hem of the material. Naruto suddenly felt like he shouldn't be spying on this kind of scene.

"Just take it off Sasuke. I only want a quick look," complained Kakashi.

"You can't make me like this, you have no more hands. This position is useless Kakashi," pointed out Sasuke smirking.

"Sasuke..." Kakashi sounded tired.

"What."

"Come on. I'll leave you alone if you do. I just need to check you're really fine like you say you are."

Sasuke squirmed for a few moments and then nodded angrily. Kakashi let him go and Sasuke began to pull his shirt over his head. Naruto felt a sudden shudder and his blood ran cold.

I shouldn't be watching this. I shouldn't be spying!

His heart skipped a beat.

Scars.

Huge, terrible scars.

All over Sasuke's perfectly white back.

They were red-purple and two of them looked particularly bad, deeper in colour and stretching from just higher than his kidneys and ended at his shoulder blades, widening from top to bottom to form a slightly uneven upside down V, like maybe at one point Sasuke might have had wings but they'd been ruthlessly ripped out. Maybe once he'd been angel... Naruto drew his breaths quick and shallow, his eyes roaming Sasuke's marred white skin, sliding over the V and flicking over the lighter scars on his shoulders and around his middle, tracing the healed cuts that flanked the worst of the scars. When Naruto looked harder they looked more like claw marks from some kind of animal...

Sasuke turned to show Kakashi his back. Naruto shrunk further into the wall to avoid being seen and watched the other boy's uncomfortable expression.

"Hmmm? They seem pretty good Sasuke. Were you planning on doing some training today?"

"Hn." Sasuke stood awkwardly in the middle of the side street. No one bothered to look off to the right and see the two males. No one saw Naruto watching them either.

"Take it easy ok Sasuke. I mean, training is good even if we are off missions but these are still pretty new. Don't go all out."

"Whatever." Kakashi examined Sasuke a while longer, running the tips of his fingers that poked out of his gloves over the boy's skin. Sasuke visible shivered when he brushed over the inverted V.

"Naruto." Kakashi called him and Naruto blinked three times quick. By that time Sasuke had his shirt back on and Kakashi was gone. He blinked again. The other boy was watching him silently. Damn it. He'd got caught spying red handed.

"Ah... Sasuke san... Sorry, I didn't mean to, I just... I heard you guys and I was actually looking for you..." Naruto tripped over his words and his feet, nearly tumbling to his knees as he stepped away from the wall, launching into his words like he was talking in the middle of a conversation but there was no start before then. He was nervous and embarrassed. Sasuke was quiet, his face spookily calm. Was he like this all the time? Such a change from the Sasuke san from yesterday who talked and ran and hit. He was the Sasuke san from the hospital. Quiet with a hollow look of beauty. Naruto shuffled his feet. His fingers fumbled around the knot on the lunch Iruka had prepared for him. There was a moment silence while Naruto recomposed himself and tried again.

"Look, Sasuke san... About yesterday. I'm sorry about all that..."

Sasuke said nothing.

"And I wanted to make sure that you.. that we are still..." Something flickered in the silent male's face.

"I'm training today." Blunt. Polite. Final.

"Ah... I see." Naruto rubbed the back of his head and smiled tightly. "Ok then. See you later Sasuke san..." Turning, the blonde bit his lip.

Sasuke san hates me...

"Ne. Naruto."

"Yes," Naruto turned eagerly. Sasuke's voice was different this time. He didn't sound angry or happy. Naruto couldn't decipher the emotion behind it but it was different he was sure.

"You can come."

"Huh?"

"Come."

A smile pushed its way onto Naruto's face. He didn't want to show he was so happy that Sasuke wasn't mad since he wasn't even sure he had forgiven the other boy yet, but he couldn't help it. Naruto wasn't even sure why he was so glad but he nearly skipped to Sasuke's side and beamed up at him, chuckling a little at how Sasuke scowled in the reply to his friendly smile. Weren't smiles supposed to be contagious or something? Was Sasuke just immune to that kind of thing? Well, it didn't matter to Naruto much right now anyway. He just smiled and Sasuke scowled. Things felt alright.

At the mouth of the side street Sasuke stopped just short of moving into the flow of people.

"I won't spoil you," he said.

"Wa?"

"I won't spoil you so don't expect me to look after you or do... anything."

"Anything?" Naruto cocked his head and Sasuke began walking. He followed. Raising his voice the young ninja continued.

"I'll tell you how it is Dobe since you don't remember."

"Don't call me that!" exclaimed Naruto. Sasuke kept on talking.

"We are weird and not like usual friends. I don't spoil you. In fact I'm not even very nice to you and you're probably worse to me." The smaller boy watched the other as he spoke, deadly serious and tense. This was important so Naruto didn't interrupt even though he knew that already; that they were weird. That Sasuke wasn't gentle. That they fought a lot. He'd been told. But it seemed important for Sasuke to get this out so the blonde was quiet.

"You can come along because we are "_friends_"," Sasuke spat the word bitterly but somehow Naruto wasn't unsettled or put off by the tone.

"Do whatever you want but don't get in my way. I'm not going to look after you." Sasuke's gaze never moved from in front of him. It was hard for Naruto to try and figure out how he was feeling from the side.

"Ok, Sasuke san," he replied. It felt weird to comply so easily. Why was that?

"Good," muttered Sasuke.

…

At the training ground at the river Sasuke and Naruto stood at the water's edge. Sasuke wanted to go to the other side. There was a big area full of targets and Sasuke hadn't practiced with kunai in a while. But there was a problem. Sasuke could walk across all the way with ease over the deep parts. Naruto couldn't.

"You just go home then," muttered Sasuke taking a couple of steps atop the water. Naruto pouted and crouched down, poking the water like he was trying to work out why it wouldn't solidify for him. He stood up.

"I can make it." He splashed into the shallows. "I'll swim." Sasuke frowned. What an idiot. The river was way over his head and much too swift in the middle.

"No way."

"What!"

"No way!"

Glare.

Pout.

A stab of familiarity.

Sasuke tried to ignore it.

"Carry me then." Dark, thin eyebrows shot up beneath his forehead protector and Sasuke barked out a laugh.

"No... Way." Naruto's lips stretched into a grin and he splashed closer, soaking his shoes as the water level rose to his ankles.

"I should just do whatever I want is what you said ne?" purred the smaller boy as he took a few steps.

"I also said I wasn't going to look after you," counter Sasuke moving back atop the glassy surface of water as Naruto moved forward again.

"You don't have to. I'll just hold on," reasoned Naruto darkly, his cobalt blues bright and mischievous.

"How very forward of you, yesterday you were much more careful with that stupid mouth of yours," teased Sasuke, buying himself time to move back and back again, but Naruto still followed, now knee deep and bending his knees.

"Usuratonkachi... Don't you dare..."

"What was that name? Now I'm definitely going to do it! Don't move Sasuke san!"

_Splash!_

…

Wet and angry on the other side of the river, Sasuke stood over Naruto who was nursing his cheek, prodding it gently with his fingers. Another wave of frustration tingled dangerously in the young Uchiha's palm. Naruto looked up at him and frowned.

"You didn't have to hit me."

"Yeah I did."

"And now lunch is ruined because you moved and we splashed it. Iruka san went to all the trouble to make it... I was going to share it too..." Sasuke continued to scowl, attempting to pull himself back from the edge of anger or something else.

I said I wouldn't spoil you, that I wasn't going to look after you and yet there I was carrying you over the water on my back because you are so helpless. Even after you jumped on me and pushed us both over. I don't know how to act around you anymore...

Idiot.

"I won't even say thanks for carrying me over here now," muttered Naruto under his breath as he wrung out the material that Iruka had wrapped the lunch in. Sasuke drew a breath so long that it made him dizzy.

Remembering the feeling of Naruto's wet body against his, his arms around his neck, his wet smell mingling with the young Uchiha's own sent a rush of red streaking over Sasuke's nose. Even now something like that made him embarrassed and his heart race. It was so strange to have those kinds of thoughts when Naruto knew absolutely nothing. He couldn't remember that he confessed first. That it was he who had kissed Sasuke first. Naruto had been the leader and now Sasuke was a lost follower. He needed him back. He needed_ his_ Naruto.

The claim sent another rush through Sasuke's body when he realized that he had just thought something like that again so easily and Naruto's eyes sparked with fear, obviously interpreting the way Sasuke's ivory skin had changed to a flushed red, as anger.

"I'm training now," said Sasuke quietly. "You stay here and watch."

"Ok." Naruto relaxed and Sasuke walked into the centre of the targeted clearing and pulled a handful of kunai from his holster, fanning them between his long fingers. He paused and glanced back at Naruto.

"You should actually take cover. I'm good, but just in case."

"_I'll be fine since I can easily dodge all the ones you'll miss Sasuke teme!" _

Were the words that should have reached the Uchiha's ears. Instead another obedient answer.

"Ok." Calm.

Kunai in hand and carefully expressionless mask in place Sasuke moved forward. Even so, his hands shook with reminiscences.

It'll be ok. I only need this training and that'll be fine for a while. Then I can focus on getting back his memories, Sasuke reassured himself uneasily. The loops on the kunai, all bunched together in his palm became slick with the sweat on his hands.

I'll do it. It'll all be alright.


	22. Chapter 22

_Sorry for the delay. Anyone who is up with the manga should be able to see how manga Sasuke could be giving me and probably a lot of other writers problems. Its hard to imagine him not trying to kill people and showing concern for anyone but himself right now =_=_

_Anyways, Chpater 22. Oh! And massive thankyou, huggies and kissies to Maria for helping me. I nearly cried in relief ^_^;_

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* * *

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In all honesty, he wanted to defy Sasuke and swim.

In all honesty, he was happy just to be conversing so easily in the form of the fight.

In all honesty, he was becoming the tiniest amount captivated by the other boy...

When he'd jumped at him, Naruto knew Sasuke would move but he jumped anyway. The taller boy stood a top the river's surface had moved his half his body away by the time Naruto was upon him, but only half so they collided and fell. It was amazing to just fall without putting your hands out to stop you because there wasn't enough room with someone tumbling with you. Freefalling.

When they hit the water Sasuke had moved back to being completely beneath him again and caught the blonde with his body. Naruto fell heavily between Sasuke's legs on his knees, his face smacking itself on the chest in front of him; his important head area saved by Sasuke who had yelped at the bite of the cold water.

But it wasn't the shooting pain of the rocks under his shins, or the jolt of his head being snapped back on impact that Naruto noticed while they were sat there in the cold water, shaking the splash from their hair and laughing and scowling and hitting and pouting. It wasn't any of that that stayed in Naruto's new memory, it wasn't any of that that lingered in his mind as he had sat watching Sasuke hit every target in the clearing perfectly afterwards while he sunned himself.

It was Sasuke's smell that he hadn't been close enough yet to smell ever before that got Naruto.

The mixed aroma of jasmine and juniper, vaguely intimate with a warning bitterness to it that was heightened by the wet of the boy's clothes, skin and hair. It was warm in a strange way, so natural and perfectly 'Sasuke san'.

It wasn't something incredible for Naruto to say that it was a smell he had decided he loved straight away since he didn't know many smells in comparison, but he thought it anyway. The feeling he had lying there in that one second of aftershock with his ear against Sasuke's heart, his arms halfway down the other boy's shoulders; slipped from clutching his neck in attack, his body pressed to another... with that smell encircling them, enveloping them... Naruto was warm despite the pool they sat to the waists in.

Safe.

Sanctuary.

A feeling provoked by Sasuke's jasmine scent, even stronger than the first time Sasuke had walked into the hospital room with no name...

Naruto exhaled slowly into the late afternoon. Sasuke had been training for a long time. The day was nearly gone. The blonde now sat on the far side of the clearing on a slope in the long grass waiting quietly, running his fingers through the tall threads every now and then to reassure himself that after being silent for so long that he was still tied to the living world. Would they be going home soon? Where would he sleep tonight? His own 'home'? Naruto's eyes followed Sasuke's flight in mid air as he twisted, releasing one by one and two at a time, sometimes three, of his weapons in a precise assault. The river bubbled and chattered happily.

It was so strange. How could you have such a strong feeling, a feeling he thought he'd lost when he had learnt Uchiha Sasuke's name, just from being near enough to breathe someone in? How could you feel such soothing, such a comfort just being with someone, just speaking to them? Naruto was only just realizing it. The effect being with Sasuke had on him. Not like how it was with Iruka. Not how it was with Kakashi or Sakura...

They were a strange pair, right? They were mean and cold with their words and actions, right? Then why? Even after being hit again. Naruto was happy. Happy just to be.

Was this what friendship...what _their_ friendship, was like? A bond that was so different to any other he had encountered so far. One where he could run his mouth off if he felt like it, where he could say and do whatever he liked and it felt like Sasuke wouldn't leave; get mad sure, but not leave. A bond where he could be as reckless as he wanted to be. It wasn't the words between them that made him feel close to Sasuke. It wasn't that they were friendly at all; it was just being near enough him to feel him.

Companionship. It had happened so fast. Just today. Just now. A safeness with the person most likely to hurt him in both ways, physically and emotionally.

The wind rustled the grass around him and Naruto looked up, not remembering having his eyes drop from Sasuke to his hands hanging between his knees. The dark haired boy was making his way up the small slope toward him. Nothing was said as Sasuke flopped down next to him. Naruto smiled, willing to bet he didn't smell like jasmine anymore. More like damp metal and sweat.

"Done?"

"Yup." Sasuke looked sweaty and sticky, his skin shiny and pasty in the late sun but still glowing surreally.

"You're really good with those," commented Naruto.

"Kunai?"

"Yeah."

"I guess. I learnt from someone who was _lethal_ with these things." Naruto tried not to notice the tone of Sasuke's voice he didn't understand when he said 'lethal'. They sat for a while.

"When are we going back?" asked Naruto.

"When I've caught my breath a bit," replied Sasuke. Naruto lay down too, falling into the grass.

"Ne, Sasuke san. Can you teach me to walk on water?"

Sasuke barked out a dry laugh.

"Impossible you idiot."

"Why!" Naruto screwed up his face, closing his eyes angrily as he frowned.

"Because, Dobe, it's not possible in your state."

"Why?" Sasuke sighed in reply and rolled over to be propped up on one elbow facing Naruto.

"Look." Sasuke opened his hand as he spoke like the explanation was sitting right there in his palm. "You're not a ninja anymore. You forgot everything you know. To be able to walk on water you need to precise chakra control. You need to be able to channel your chakra to the most difficult place; in your feet." Naruto blinked and arched his eye brows, getting a bit lost.

"They teach us in the academy when we are learning all the basics; how to feel chakra within our bodies and be able to use it to give us the boost to be able to run really fast and jump between trees. Right now you can't even feel the chakra in your body right? You're not aware of it even being there right?"

"There's something inside me?" Naruto's eyes widened. What was chakra? Sasuke ran his hand over his face and fell back onto his back.

"Yes... Chakra- your energy, the stuff that would power your jutsus if you had any," replied Sasuke wearily. Naruto sat up and leant over the Uchiha, looking into his tired face, his dark eyes that peered back up at him.

"Can you see it Sasuke? How do you know I have it?" Again Sasuke sighed closing his eyes for a moment and then reopening them, training them on Naruto once more.

"Apart from the fact that I've seen you use the stuff and somehow seen it come from your body, yes I can see it." The breeze quickened as it jumped across the tips of the grass. Sasuke's eyes grew wide enough for the iris to sit alone in the white and Naruto watched in complete amazement as it filled with red.

Backing up a little Naruto asked, "W-what is that?" He drank in Sasuke's eyes, all bright and alive, bound by the burning of them, still hovering over the other boy.

"The Sharingan. Right now I can see the chakra in your body."

"That's... insane..." murmured Naruto. Sasuke's mouth turned up into a smirk and he snorted a soft laugh through his nose.

"It's nothing scary if you're on my team so don't worry."

"Y-yeah..." Sasuke laughed softly again and Naruto kept watching even as Sasuke's eyes faded to black.

"What are you looking at Dobe?" asked Sasuke.

"Nothing... I was just wondering..."

"...?" Sasuke's questioning silent reply hung in the air between them.

...What your real laugh sounds like... What do you sound like when you are laughing properly? Not that soft snort or that high and mighty chuckle...

Sasuke san's laughter...

Another thing that would surely captivate him. It was all the little things that Sasuke didn't willingly share.

Naruto cleared his throat.

"I was just wondering," he repeated casually. "Are you ticklish at all Sasuke san?"

"No."

"Really?" The mischievous smile from across the river was edging onto Naruto's mouth.

"Naruto..." A warning.

Ignored.

Taking advantage of the bond they had that allowed them to do or say anything, Naruto pounced, his fingers attacking Sasuke's ribcage. Immediately Sasuke was squirming, protesting angrily at first, throwing his fists around but then was in bouts of throaty laughter, ringing out loud and clear between his insults and huge gasping breaths.

"Stop it! Stooop! Na- Na- Naruto!" Sasuke managed in protest and then grabbed the other boy and tickled him back, his fingertips scampering messily over his sides. Naruto laughed until he cried and lost all strength to tickle Sasuke any longer. He then collapsed half on top of the other boy and they lay panting, flesh to flesh until they had calmed down.

Smack! The back of Sasuke's hand flew out and hit him across the forehead with a sting that made his eyes water. Naruto rolled over, still panting and laughing softly. It was nice right now. Even though he'd been hit _again_, it was nice because he'd done something you shouldn't do to someone you hardly knew and it was ok. The sky was turning red above them; the colour of Sasuke's ninja eyes turned into something incredible, smeared and stretched out across the sky.

_"He's having a hard time understanding why you two aren't the same with each other."_

Naruto blinked lazily his mind on the person lying next to him.

Don't worry Sasuke san. You don't have to be nice to me because I can accept your cold shoulder. I know that's how you are. I know that really you care about me inside so being cold is fine. And I will keep being stupid and reckless, doing whatever I want without a second thought because you seem to like that. Tiptoeing around you, trying to force myself; you don't like that. So I'll just do whatever I feel without ordering it in my head. Without a second thought for what your reaction might be. Because you won't leave me, ne?

"What was that about Usuratonkachi? You're such a loser today," said Sasuke next to him. Naruto looked over. Sasuke didn't look mad. He was kind of smiling.

"Nothing... I just wanted to see what you are like when you laugh," replied Naruto breathily, moving his steady blue eyes back to the red sky.

"Baka."

"That's mean."

"Hn."

Naruto hummed in response, returning to his thoughts, replaying Sasuke's expression when he laughed in his head.

Just as I thought. Sasuke san holds a lot back. What else do I not know about Sasuke san?

A lot.

I wonder when and how I should start to ask him something like that... How much is Sasuke san willing to share with a stranger in the shell of his best friend? Will I ever be able to get back to the person Sasuke san knew?

Naruto lifted his hand and spread his fingers against the canvas of the sky above, imagining another face, identical to the one he had grown used to in the mirror in such a short time; the face of Uzumaki Naruto from before. He tried to picture the metal plating across his forehead.

Can that be me ever again?

Maa, only time will tell.

…

Sasuke sneezed quietly as they walked the road back to the village. His shirt was still damp with river water and now the sweat from his training was cold and dry on his neck and chest.

I better not be getting a cold, he thought to himself. The taller boy sneezed again and he felt Naruto's eyes on him.

"Your jacket would be good right now," mused Sasuke out loud.

"My jacket?"

"Yeah. You're always wearing this orange jacket... but now that I think about it, you haven't had it since the day before..." Sasuke trailed off.

"Since the day before? Before I lost my memories?"

"Yeah...something like that" A painful stab in the chest for Sasuke as he recalled that it had been longer than that. The day of the night that Naruto came looking for him in the light rain, in the dark... the day before all that was probably the last time he'd seen Naruto's beloved jacket.

"Ne, Sasuke san..." Sasuke sneezed reply.

"I lost my memories on a mission with you right?"

Ah. They'd lied to him.

"Hn." Naruto paused, thinking it seemed.

"Kakashi san said that one of the enemies tried to completely destroy my mind but got stopped. He said that you stopped him..."

Another lie. Thanks for putting the witness position on me _Sensei_. Now he's going to want to know what happened exactly.

"Sasuke san..."

"Hmm?" Sasuke was running scenarios through his mind. It was hard to imagine Naruto with a terrified "my mind is being destroyed!" expression.

"Thanks for saving me."

Sasuke's eyes widened and he looked to the small blonde by his side. Naruto didn't look to him. He was blushing a little, a healthy flush across his sunny skin.

A reply caught in Sasuke's throat. He took a second to get over the apology, to come up with an appropriate response. Sasuke doubted he would ever be able to easily talk back to Naruto when he said something so out of character.

"Ah... Yeah..." Nice, good work there.

It was hard to lie to Naruto when he was like that. Had he looked up would the other boy be able to see the lie on Sasuke's lips?

Silence.

Today had been ok, thought Sasuke. Unsettling as it had always been so far but ok until now. Now the atmosphere was too soft; inescapable. Naruto wanted to talk. Sasuke could tell.

"Ne Sasuke san?" God, he wished he'd stop calling his 'name'.

"What is it?"

"Can I..." Sasuke sighed at the requesting, unsure tone to cover the pathetic noise of rejection pushing at his thin line lips. Naruto never used to do that.

"Can I...I mean my house isn't... well I..."

Sasuke coughed.

"Naruto."

"Yes."

"Do you want to have dinner at my house, you might not remember but I know you can't cook," said Sasuke with a smirk to give the offer a bite, an insult for the Sasuke-Naruto effect. Naruto flushed with either anger, embarrassment or happiness. Sasuke couldn't tell anymore.

"Let's go by my place and find my jacket for you Sasuke san!"

"We don't need to."

"But you keep sneezing and when you coughed just now it sounded sore."

"You don't need to notice things like that Usuratonkachi." Sasuke felt his face heat. Naruto had been paying that much attention to him? He chanced a glance. Naruto's eyes were soft. Sasuke reddened yet again.

"Sasuke san, your face is all red. Do you have a fever?" Naruto reached his hand to Sasuke's forehead but Sasuke batted it away halfway. Dobe. So naïve. A fever...

"I'm fine. If you want your jacket we can go look for it. It's up to you."

Naruto was smiling again.

"Ok."

By the time they reached Naruto's place and had found his jacket folded neatly on a chair Sasuke was shivering and feeling weak.

Damnit. Ninja are supposed to have good endurance, a lot of stamina, and now I'm sick just from falling in the river.

The boy scowled as they neared the road that lead into the Uchiha complex.

"You don't look good Sasuke san," said Naruto suddenly. Sasuke swallowed thickly. He didn't feel good.

"Here." A warmth fell to his shoulders and he jumped as Naruto draped his jacket over Sasuke's shoulders.

"I told you I don't need it!" The young Uchiha's trembling, fatigued voice gave him away. Naruto raised his eyebrows in doubt. Sasuke glared. The jacket was removed and Sasuke shivered in its absence.

…

After they had eaten Sasuke stood with his palms on the counter top. The apron he was still wearing felt heavy on his neck.

"Sasuke san?" He looked up. Naruto's horrible worried expression was reflected in the kitchen window in front of him, the boy's whiskered face pale and clear in the pane of night time. The cold of the glass so close made Sasuke dizzy as he leaned forward to examine his complexion that was even paler than Naruto's.

"Sasuke san."

"What."

"I'm... I'm staying over!" Naruto's voice was forceful and anxious at the same time.

"No you're not," snapped Sasuke. "I don't have a place for you to sleep."

"Yes I am! You're sick and there's no one here!"

Silence. Sasuke's breath was shaky. He straightened up and looked into Naruto's face again and nearly cried out. That determination. Again. He wouldn't give up. Not with that face...

Sasuke shook his head gently.

No way... Not with him like this... The last time Naruto was here they...

"Sasuke san."

Damnit.

"You good with the floor then Dobe?" A tiny smirk was all he could manage to accompany his words.

"Fine with me." Naruto came close to him and they stood together and looked at their milky night time images. Sasuke coughed painfully.

"You should go to bed Sasuke san."

"It's still early."

"You're sick."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are."

"No."

"Yes."

"What are you? My mother?"

"No."

"..."

"Where is you mother Sasuke san? She should be here to look after you." Sasuke clenched his teeth.

"You're right. She should be."

"..."

"Let's go to bed."

Too shaky to protest. Too scared he'd sound weak if he resisted. Being sick was horrible. Naruto had been talking down Sasuke's walls all evening and the way he was speaking it was like he wasn't even Naruto. It was like they were years back, like they had broken into another time where Sasuke couldn't see the kitchen window and in Naruto's place behind him was the shadow of a tall figure saying to him gently, _"Come on Sasuke, you're sick. Let's not bother anyone; I'll put you to bed." _

"Ok. Naruto," Sasuke said, saying the name to pull him back to the present.

Damn being sick. There was no good time to say "Hey Dobe, lets try get your memories back, you can count on me, I'm gonna do it!" when you're the one being lead by a small warm hand around your wrist in the wrong direction of your bedroom in your own house. There was no good time when you _he _was the one looking after _you. _

There was no good time for such a line when you were sick.

Damn.


	23. Chapter 23

_Hey there! This chapter I think I am going to blame all the OCCness that I'm paranoid about on Sasuke's fever, Naruto's memory loss and Kakashi's lack of sleep lol. Stay tuned though... Can't you feel the storm approaching? Somethings bound to happen soon after all this nothing right?_

_Just while I'm here, HUGE smoochy thank you's again to **Marcab** who is a massive inspiration to me and is pretty much the reason this story is happening. I absolutely couldn't do it without her. She's the one who deals with all the behind the scenes stuff with me and she's just a beautiful person. She's a fantastic writer, so much so that it makes me green with envy so I would REALLY recommend checking out her ridiculously amazing stories, both **Tides and Ebbs of Honesty **and **The Sun and the Rainfall**. Reading them is pretty much essential to being a fan of our boys. Complete SasuNaru wins. ^_^_

_Thanks to all my readers and especially reviewers, you know who you are, you guys make my day. Little balls of sunshine every one of you ;P_

_Enjoy~_

_

* * *

_

When Naruto woke he kept his eyes shut. Something told him not to move, not to open his eyes just yet. Just wait.

A sigh and the presence of someone next to him, the feeling of something coming closer. The blonde's heartbeat quickened slightly. And then, slowly he felt his hair lift and warm fingers slide between the strands on his forehead. His heartbeat settled somewhat as he realized who it was and where he was but it still skipped a little nervously within it's steady pace. Naruto stayed still as gently the fingers rubbed his hair between them and brushed them tenderly off of his forehead. When they skimmed his cheekbone he tried not to let his breath hitch.

Why was he being touched this way? Why wasn't it strange? Was he letting it happen?

Because somehow he felt... somehow he felt... it was hard to think and hard not to let a lazy sigh slip as heat and skin flashed accidentally across his eyelashes. It was almost as if he was feeling somewhere deep inside, that this person deserved what little comfort he could find... Somehow... this was fine... Somehow it was very right to let this person have this; it was fine to have him near... It was nice. His touch was nice.

A thumb ghosted over his funny whiskers and across his lips. It was so difficult not to part his mouth into a gasp at the whisper light touch. Warmth fluttered in the blonde's stomach. His fingers twitched where they lay on top of his stomach beneath the thick blanket. The pads of the other's fingers were warm as they smoothed Naruto's eyebrows and then returned to his hair, combing it back off his face and working tiny tangles out among the thinnest strands of the downy hair near his ears. And then it was gone. But still Naruto didn't open his eyes. He didn't know why but staying asleep seemed like the best idea. The breathing so close was short and shaky with fever or emotion.

"I miss you Dobe," said a voice close to the blonde. Naruto remained perfectly still and continued to breathe evenly through his nose, working without a trace to keep his face emotionless in case those ninja eyes could see in the dark.

"You're here but you're not... Everything you do is so the same and so different and to be honest it scares me..." Sasuke's voice trembled and Naruto wanted to bite his lip.

"I miss you," he said again. For a long while there was nothing else but the whoosh of both of their breathing. Sasuke didn't get up and leave. He didn't touch Naruto anymore. There was a knot in Naruto's chest.

Sasuke coughed loudly and that was when Naruto chose to stir. He wrinkled his nose at the sound for effect like it was that that had woken him and opened his eyes, blinking sleepily as they slipped into focus meeting Sasuke's presence lying next to him in the dark on the floor.

"Naruto?" Sasuke's voice sounded panicky. Naruto kept pretending.

"What time is it?" he asked softly.

"Dunno," replied the other boy. "Early." There was a definite tightness to his voice. Naruto drew his blanket further around his shoulders wishing he understood more.

"How's the fever?"

"Settling." Naruto blinked a few more times and lifted his head to prop it up on one hand.

"What are you doing on the floor Sasuke san? It's not warm enough to be down here when you're sick."

"I'm hot. The floors cold," replied Sasuke simply and quickly. Naruto sensed something else. Something to do with how Sasuke had been touching him. Was he lonely? Did he have a bad dream? …Both?

"Are you alright?" asked Naruto as he reached out to touch Sasuke's forehead that was clammy with sweat and still flushed with his fever. Sasuke huffed in protest at his action.

"You're still hot."

"Yeah…" There was a silence.

"Why are you awake Sasuke san?"

"Couldn't go back to sleep."

"What woke you up?"

"Nothing special." Naruto frowned a little but let it pass.

Of course Sasuke san wouldn't tell me something like that….

Would he tell _him _though?

A wave of jealousy at his old self made Naruto's breath catch in his throat. How stupid was that? How could you be jealous of yourself?

_"I miss you…"_

Naruto shook the thought away.

Sasuke hacked out another crippling cough.

"Ok?"

"Yeah."

More silence. It was making the smaller boy uncomfortable. Silence felt wrong. Even with Sasuke. He decided to be direct.

"Did you… have a bad dream or something Sasuke san?"

"It's nothing for you to worry about…"

A huge rush of frustration and longing for his memories overcame the boy with no past.

Naruto wanted them more than ever. For Sasuke, for himself, he wanted them so he would be able to know. He hated Sasuke's quick, curt answers. But it wasn't fair for him to be hurt by them when it was he who was the one being insensitive.

The only thing Naruto had determined for definite was that in the past he and Sasuke had understood each other and now that Sasuke felt he was different, he wouldn't tell him anything; tried not to show him anything. Uchiha Sasuke was still so far away and even though he had said "you can come with me", even though he was letting Naruto know that staying next to him is what he wanted… He was still holding back.

Yesterday the blonde had decided that it was fine that way. That he would keep on keeping on and things would get better…

Right now he didn't believe that so much. Sasuke face that he could now see a little in the dark was hurt and unguarded for once. From where Naruto watched him he was a little pile of warm flesh watching him without words. Probably exhausted from the fever. He looked strangely small and soft. Naruto hated to hurt him anymore.

The blonde no longer knew how to feel. Now what was the right choice? Keep on keeping on? Or… or….

Or what?

He lay back down to think.

"Ne. Sasuke san?"

"Hmm?" He sounded tired. What the smaller teen was about to say might shock the sick boy but it was worth knowing. For the sake of not having the ridiculous feeling of jealousy toward himself, for the sake of not hurting Sasuke anymore, or anyone else for that matter.

"Do you think…? I mean… Is there a way to find my memories again?"

Shock. Naruto tensed. Definite shock.

…

Sasuke's eyes widened and he sat up. The world swooned and then righted itself.

What.

How.

Why.

What was going on?

How did Naruto know that's what the raven haired boy had been thinking about? How?

Sasuke's feverish mind couldn't process properly. He wasn't sure whether he should smile or cry. He wasn't sure of anything now. He couldn't think straight at all.

Questions.

Questions.

Questions.

All swirling in his head as he stared at the other boy.

Suddenly Naruto knew everything.

He knew Sasuke had had a bad dream. He knew that. He asked about it. How did he know? How did he know about it? Did he know the contents of the dream too?

Did he know about how he had been standing in that ocean of blood again? How usually he and Naruto stood back to back with it raging around them and how usually because the other boy was there it was bearable.

Did he know about how usually they stood and breathed together as one, so in sync that Sasuke could feel their shoulders rise and fall against each other in perfect time? Did he know that this time Naruto wasn't there and he had been alone? Did he know how Sasuke had panicked? Did he know how they had been torn apart?

Did he know about the two of them in that sea of blood from years gone by? Their blood stained bodies? Their blood stained bond? Their Blood Stained Breaths….

Could he sense it as soon as he awoke?

Naruto knew. Even after sleeping the small amount he had and waking up feeling he had enough of his defenses back after being stripped of them hours before, Sasuke was still defenseless inside this moment. Naruto had seen inside him somehow?

"Sasuke san?" Naruto's voice ventured and the blue of his eyes shone dimly in the gloom. Sasuke tried to gather himself.

Calm down. Calm down. The fever's really gotten to you. What a state you are Uchiha. Calm down. Breathe.

"Naruto. I…" he started

"You don't want to?"

"Wha?"

"You don't want to get them back…?" Sasuke swallowed with difficulty and lay back down seeking safety in the coolness of the floorboards against his cheek.

I do but it was me who was supposed to ask about that, he thought. They lay side by side. Fever swept Sasuke's body. His head pounded. He wanted to go back to sleep.

"Sasuke san. I'll be honest because otherwise maybe we won't go anywhere," said Naruto. "I want to get my memories back. Its not nice not knowing anything. If someone can take away memories, shouldn't there also be a way to get them back? Yes or no?" Sasuke opened his mouth and closed it again.

"Yes," he murmured. Naruto breathed out.

"Will you help me Sasuke san? Yes or no?"

"Yes."

Both boys fell silent. Sasuke shivered under Naruto's gaze.

"Sasuke san."

"Naruto."

"Are cold?"

"A little."

"Why don't you scoot over here then if you're not getting back on the bed? You'll get sicker if you stay there without a blanket." Naruto suggested to the drowsy, sick boy next to him. Sasuke breathed in slowly. Naruto knew almost everything right now. He knew how Sasuke needed someone near.

What he didn't know was that Uchiha Sasuke never indulged such weak needs, even when he was sick and so far it had been pretty much acceptable to do anything. Touching Naruto earlier… He hoped the other boy hadn't been awake. It had been completely spur of the moment but it had felt so good to feel him.

However. Uchiha Sasuke was never weak enough to be vulnerable enough to be coaxed into bed with someone else.

"I'm fine here Dobe," he muttered. "I'm fine here…"

As he slipped Sasuke felt warmth at his cheeks and in his hair. He felt someone smoothing his eyebrows. Before he let sleep have him again he heard someone murmur "lets have pancakes for breakfast" and he nearly tried to summon the energy to reply "with banana and chocolate chips" just to see what the reaction might be. Sasuke fell back to sleep to the sound of Naruto's familiar and unfamiliar breathing pattern.

…

Kakashi had been sitting in that tree with his binoculars, watching through the window that had forgotten to have its curtains drawn, as long as the boys had been in the house. He'd been tailing them since he picked up on them leaving Naruto's house. His legs were numb. The Hokage had told him this morning that he had a mission coming up. He had six days of keeping an eye on the boys and then he had a whole day briefing and then a whole day training session before he left on his mission. So far watching his two kids had been fairly easy after he had concluded that Sasuke's fever was nothing to be too worried over.

It was about 4: 30am. At 2:30 am Sasuke had jolted upright in bed, panting and in quite a state. He'd curled himself into a little ball on his side for about half an hour. It had been hard for Kakashi to sit and watch Sasuke through the night vision binoculars in his after-nightmare state for that time. At approximately 3am Sasuke unfurled and got up and lay down next to where Kakashi could only assume Naruto was lying. The bed blocked the view of the other boy but from his the angle the tree gave him he could still see Sasuke's face. Again it was hard. Because Sasuke thought no one was watching and his face had been so open. The jounin had rarely seen him like that. After about another half an hour Naruto had woken and his head had come into view as he sat up. He then lay back down and Kakashi zeroed in with his binoculars to read Sasuke's lips. Nothing much was said. He assumed that Naruto may have been the one doing most of the talking. Sasuke didn't want to say much, or couldn't say much.

As their team leader sat and watched he'd read two consecutive "yes"s on the young Uchiha's lips and smiled to himself. He wondered whether Naruto had played the yes/no game. He used to do that all the time before he lost his memories whenever he wanted a straight answer from Sasuke who would give elusive responses just to annoy the blonde. Kakashi wondered how having that used on him again made Sasuke feel…

Kakashi checked his watch. Ten minutes had passed. He checked his binoculars. Sasuke looked like he was asleep. Naruto probably was too. Sneaking closer, he jumped from the tree and landed without a sound. A few long strides nearer and he could see into Sasuke's bedroom window and over the bed.

Naruto was snuggled up in the top half of a blanket with his hand reached out, his fingertips near Sasuke's face. Half of the blanket was kicked over Sasuke's feet. The Uchiha was lying on his side breathing evenly. His face looked peaceful. Kakashi pondered again what Naruto's side of the conversation had been like. Before the yes's this slightly horrified look of surprise had passed over Sasuke's features. An important expression, so hugely open and un-Sasuke-ish. Maybe they would talk about it again when they woke and Kakashi would be able to lip read what was causing the young ninja to make such a face.

His cool breath froze in the air before him and rose for half a second in a transparent curl. It was an unusually cold night for Konoha. Kakashi shivered and leapt back into his tree, settling down to wait for sunrise.

…

Daybreak came all too quickly. Kakashi had fallen asleep and by the time he had woken the sun had already risen and if one of the boys had cared to look out the window they would have seen him there in the tree as plain as day. He congratulated himself on his great ninja alertness…

But the boys were no longer in Sasuke's room.

Kakashi switched positions, making a loop around the Uchiha house to the window in the kitchen above the sink. The Uchiha's had trees in the most convenient places and this one had foliage that provided the perfect hiding place but also a clear view into the kitchen. Kakashi wondered if that hadn't been an accident…

This time he could see both boys. Sasuke was at the stove, half visible as he stood off to the side with a set of cooking chopsticks in his hand. He was inside the window frame enough to read lips though so that was fine. Naruto was sitting at the table out from the kitchen watching and waiting. Kakashi focused on their lip movements and began to pick up the conversation.

_:What's for breakfast?_

_:Pancakes. You asked for them right?_

_:Ah… Yeah, I had them at the hospital so I was thinking I'd like to have them again. Can you make them?_

_:Yeah. I'm putting banana and chocolate chips in them._

_:Weird but ok._

Sasuke flipped in silence for a while making a neat pile of pancakes. He'd make a great housewife one day. The jounin smiled sadly. Or he'd make a good husband…

The pancakes came to the table and Sasuke sat opposite Naruto. Both young males started eating. After a while Sasuke spoke again.

_:I'm not going to spoon feed you._

_:What? I'm eating by myself just fine. What are you talking about!_

_:I'm not talking about the food baka! _

Naruto's unimpressed face and Sasuke's irritated one. Nostalgic.

_:I'm talking about your memories. I'm not going to spoon feed you._

Ah, so Sasuke had made his move last night? But Kakashi hadn't seen it. Did he miss it? Or could it possibly have been… Naruto?

_:Oh.. Well I have to get them back on my own then?_

_:I'm going to help. I can take you to places that you feel a lot about and stuff…_

_:And that's not spoon feeding me?... Where are we going first?_

_:… You'll have to wait and see. _

_:You haven't got that far have you Sasuke san?_

_:You'll have to wait and see._

_:Sure sure. _

It was going to be a very long six days of observations if there wasn't even a plan yet, Kakashi could tell already. Sasuke definitely wouldn't let Kakashi come along on his own free will, not while he was trying to pry open Naruto with his own sentimentality… So he'd have to follow the pair secretly.

A very long, possibly painful six days indeed.


	24. Chapter 24

_Attention! It's probably pretty important you read this. Ok so, I think this will probably be my last chapter for a little bit because I have come to the point where it is __10 __days until I go on a little trip of two weeks to Japan. I don't want to try and put anything up any closer to the time otherwise its going to be like "and then Sasuke and Naruto were so fed up with the village being so familiar to one and so unfamiliar to another that they took off to Japan together and nearly threw up with excitement in the week or so beforehand..." Or something. So! This is it for a few weeks. I will update ASAP when I return though, provided nothing bad happens on my travels so keep a look out for Chapter 25 ;P _

_Without further ado, Chapter 24_

_

* * *

_Kakashi read through his notes slowly his eyes moving easily through the familiar format of a mission report that he had set for himself. He wouldn't slack off if it looked like this even if the daily entries were written informally.

--

**Report**

Name: _Kakashi Hatake_

Rank: _Konoha Jounin_

Subjects: _Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke_

Mission: _Follow and observe _

-

**Day One**

_Information obtained through reading lips__ and listening in. _

_Sasuke and Naruto stayed at Sasuke's over night. They had breakfast early and after Sasuke asked Naruto what questions he had. Naruto asked how they met. Sasuke said in the academy. Naruto asked what their first meeting had been like. Sasuke explained about how they had hated each other at the start. He ran through the story of "Sasuke and Naruto", the story anyone who knows the two of them knows, briefly without going into too much detail. Naruto asked the same about Sakura, Iruka and myself. Sasuke told him what he could. At approximately 11am they took a second tour around the village and Sasuke asked Naruto to tell him if any places felt different to him. They stopped for lunch at 12:37 at Ichiraku Ramen and Naruto re- met the stand owner and his daughter. Tour continued. The only place Naruto said he felt slightly weird about was Team 7's bridge. Naruto went home at 3pm. I followed Sasuke. He went past Sakura's place and stared at her house for a good 10 minutes. He went home after that at 3:43._

Comments.

_Sasuke should have told Naruto more about himself. Naruto needs to trust him. Even if this mission is futile__._

_Sasuke should work out more of what he's going to do. _

_Naruto should have been told more about his past but its hard to do that when we have to skip out all the bad stuff. Probably not a good idea to let him in on the Kyuubi thing and the isolation._

_At the bridge__, Sasuke should have asked Naruto why he felt that way. Sasuke isn't ready for this. He doesn't want to know what Naruto doesn't remember. "He doesn't remember anything" feels safer than knowing specifics. But maybe he needs more time to think…_

_Does Sasuke want to involve Sakura?_

-

**Day Two**

_Information obtained through reading lips and listening in. _

_-Sasuke came to pick Naruto up from his place at 9am. Naruto was asleep. Sasuke made breakfast again. _

_-Went back to the bridge. Sasuke told Naruto a few stories about Team 7. Asked if it brought anything back. Naruto said no. No feelings? No again. Nothing in particular. _

_-Sasuke and Naruto argued about what "nothing in particular" meant. Sasuke nearly hit him._

_-Sasuke got fed up __with Naruto's company and ditched him with Sakura in the middle of the village at 10:25. Told her nothing of what they had been doing. _

_- Sakura and Naruto went for lunch together. Sakura looked awkward. Naruto was pretty quiet. _

_- I came out and joined them at 10:31. Naruto didn't tell us anything about what he and Sasuke had been up to. Sakura didn't ask. I didn't either even though I haven't seen Sasuke tell him to keep it a secret. _

_- We hung around in the restaurant for a while. Conversation was limited._

_- We walked Sakura home._

_-I showed Naruto where I live. He came in and we had tea._

_-Naruto went home._

Comments

_-__Sasuke is still being too brief._

_-__Sasuke is being childish and I think Naruto was hurt about being abandoned today. _

_-__Everything is too polite even though I have spent time with Naruto in the hospital. _

_-__I need Iruka with me if I'm going to talk to Naruto at length again._

_-__Sakura should be in on this simply because I think its unfair she's left out._

_-__I hate this. I hate this mission. I hate Kyuubi. _

--

It was no use.

"I can't do this," murmured the silver haired jounin to himself as he sat in the tree outside Sasuke's room. It was nearly midnight, the end of day three. Sasuke was sleeping. Naruto was probably at Iruka's place.

"It can't do this like this..."

Its was too hard to record what was happening. He'd tried to just write the events. He'd tried to list in bullet points. Honestly, he just didn't want to take anything down. It was much too personal, especially the comments part. He wasn't comfortable with any one reading what he's written in his "report". The familiar format of a normal Konoha mission report paper didn't soothe the man at all. It felt wrong to write like they were people he didn't know as well as he did.

What was even more frustrating was that he wasn't the kind of person to say "I've failed and I'm ready to be shown how". He had to shoulder all on his own even though the Hokage has said "come and see me if you have trouble". Iruka would be the one to go to for help. He was the only other person close enough to understand but Hatake Kakashi wasn't that person. He wasn't the person to ask for help. What ninja was?

Kakashi growled softly under his breath. He had to record what happened that day but it was so wrong.

Today Sasuke had tried again. It was strange really. Naruto was the primary "subject", Sasuke was just the one helping but it was the Uchiha house that he stayed close too at night, it was the Uchiha boy who he followed more closely. Maybe because he had always felt that he and Sasuke were alike. That they understood each other a little. In his mind he paired himself with Sasuke and Iruka with Naruto. Just how it was.

That morning Sasuke came for Naruto again. Kakashi had watched the blonde boy through the window that looked straight in from the wall by his bed to the door. Naruto was no longer a ninja so he didn't sense Kakashi behind him. When Sasuke knocked he stood at the door for a while. His shoulders were tense. He was definitely hurt but he eventually let Sasuke in and they had breakfast together again. Kakashi hadn't been able to see the rest of the interaction because with Sasuke sitting across the small table from Naruto he had a clear view out the window and to where the copycat ninja had previously been observing. He picked up the conversation again when the two boys left the house and started into the village.

Naruto asked timidly what the plan was for today and Sasuke had said that he was going to take him to places where big events in Naruto's life had happened. Kakashi arched his eyebrows in surprise. Where were places that big things had happened in Naruto's life that Sasuke knew? The jounin had shaken his head. Surely no one but Naruto could know that.

In fact the place that Sasuke intended to take Naruto was outside the village gates and suddenly it clicked as Kakashi recalled the blonde haired boy's look of delight and yell of enthusiasm as the stepped out of the shadow of the giant Konoha gates. Naruto's first time out of his home village. Kakashi remembered how he had stifled a laugh at Naruto's efforts to suppress his excitement when Sakura asked him what he was so happy about in a tone that made it seem like she was completely casual about such a thing. Naruto didn't want to seem "uncool" in front of Sakura or childish in front of Sasuke so he got over the thrill pretty quickly but that probably was something quite big for him.

Maybe he had had a sense of freedom when he left. Suddenly he was in the outside world where whomever they met along the way wouldn't know about what terrors lurked within his small body. No one was going to think of him as a monster. The only ones who knew he had been shunned were his team that he had already come to trust in the short time they had been together.

Sasuke was making his way toward the gates when Kakashi decided it was about time to stop him. Naruto wasn't allowed outside the village. Hokage's orders.

The man took a quick left then a right and landed on the path that would met with Sasuke's and Naruto's when they got to the road that lead out of Konoha. He walked swiftly with his book in front of his nose while keeping an eye out for the boys. He could feel them approaching. When they came into earshot Kakashi looked up casually and put a hand up in greeting. Naruto smiled in reply and Sasuke scowled.

"What are you doing here _sensei_...?" asked Sasuke; mock-politeness.

"Nothing much, just on a walk. Where might you two be off to _Sasuke kuuun~_?_"_ asked Kakashi, dragging out the younger male's name teasingly. Sasuke blinked and Naruto blushed, embarrassed by the "affection" lathered onto his friend's name by an older man. Figures he wouldn't pick up it was merely banter.

"We're going for a walk too. What does it look like?" snapped Sasuke.

Just as I thought, thought Kakashi. Sasuke was frustrated. He always snapped easier when he was annoyed or tired. He'd been sleeping alright so it must be the stress this "mission" of his was putting on the young man.

"Where to?"

"Outside if you must know."

"Sasuke."

"Yes?" The older man watched the younger's closely and then flicked his eyes to Naruto, smiling slightly to reassure him it was still friendly-ish as Sasuke's growled quietly.

"You can't take him outside the village Sasuke."

"Hokage's orders?"

"Hokage's orders."

Naruto looked a bit disappointed and stepped up to protest but Kakashi caught him first.

"Naruto. You can't leave Konoha. You're a civilian, who knows what could happen to you."

"But... Sasuke san is with me..." The jounin sighed and rolled his shoulders. Naruto's crest fallen face was always got him because Naruto very rarely showed true disappointment in a form other than yelling and ranting.

"You may think that your Sasuke is all the protection you need but any ninja good enough could kill you both in a heartbeat," replied Kakashi gently, a tiny smile playing on his masked lips when Naruto flushed at "your Sasuke".

Suddenly the air spiked and Kakashi felt the cold terror/excitement of a kunai coming for him from behind. The thrill surged as he spun and caught his attacker in the face with the back of his fist. The sharp metal guard's edge on the back of his glove sliced cleanly through his cheek. Sasuke's bushin behind Naruto dispersed and the boy himself stepped back from where his true form stood behind Kakashi. Blood dripped down his cheek.

"See?" said Kakashi cheerfully, smiling warmly at Sasuke who spat blood that had found its way inside of his mouth.

"Naruto we can't have you-" The man's stopped short as he met Naruto's face. The boy's shocking eyes were wide, his mouth hanging open, his jaw slack, his shoulders risen and body trembling. Tears shimmered across his stunned blue vision and then fell unrestrained over the blonde's now pale face.

Even now, the guilt splashed in Kakashi's stomach like a sick wave of nausea.

Naruto's eyes could still track at ninja speed. He'd seen what had happened then. He'd seen Sasuke come with the kunai; he'd seen Kakashi backhand him with more force that really should have been applied. He could still see perfectly what had taken place between the two ninja.

Kakashi hadn't even considered that at the time.

Naruto's legs buckled and he had reached for Sasuke and in a split second the raven was there to wrap his arms around the other boy as he fell.

"Sasu…Sasu..ke…sa…san…" The tears kept coming. He was trembling. Naruto's fingers went to Sasuke's face, touching the blood and crying out as it stained his skin.

Normally at this age, even a child who wasn't a ninja wouldn't be so shocked at something like this. They had seen fights in their childhood, they'd seen their mothers cut their fingers with knives, they'd seen the own blood gush from tiny scratches that always bleed way too much. But Naruto had never seen anyone hit anyone seriously, let alone cut them on purpose.

Sasuke murmured gently to the other boy.

"It's just a scratch; cuts like this always bleed a lot Dobe. We were just playing. I thought I could get him but I couldn't. He wouldn't really hurt me, Naruto."

Kakashi stepped forward, putting out a hand to the pair.

"Naruto…" He walked to them and knelt down on one knee. Naruto had his face buried in Sasuke's neck and was making strange choking noises. Sasuke had his arms around the boy, one at his waist, one around his neck, an open, spur of the moment action of comfort and protection.

The jounin went to touch Naruto's shoulder. Sasuke let him rub the boys back before drawing him away as he stood, bringing Naruto with him, the blonde's head still on Sasuke's shoulder. The two ninja's exchanged apologetic, guilty looks. They were both to blame. They had both miscalculated. Sasuke was mad at the stab to his ego and Kakashi wanted to play a bit to prove his point.

"I'll take him home…" muttered Sasuke.

"Yeah…maybe to Iruka…" replied Kakashi.

"Yeah."

Kakashi let Sasuke take Naruto to Iruka on his own and then followed the boy home. By the time he caught back up to him the blood was gone…

The night was warm. Kakashi sat stiffly in his tree. Inside the house Sasuke rolled over in his sleep. Kakashi watched his face thinking numbly that Sasuke really should remember to close his curtains instead of just falling into bed. The boy's features pulled into a frown and then an anguished expression surfaced. He'd been doing that a lot tonight. Tears on pallid skin glistened in the moonlight. Another nightmare… Kakashi hadn't seen traces of fitful sleep since Naruto was last there but right now the sorrow was evident on the boy's face. Tears. So strange on Sasuke…

At that moment a scream, audible even through the walls of the house, ripped apart the silence and Sasuke jerked into a sitting position in bed. The man in the tree bolted from the tree before he could be seen, his Day Three report uncompleted.

Naruto lay awake in bed. It was 3:15 in the morning according to Iruka's bedside alarm clock. He hadn't slept at all.

Today had been horrible. He'd been so excited when Sasuke told him they were going some place special. He thought there would be progress but instead he'd seen something he wasn't used to and ended up crying and Sasuke had to take him back. After seeing Kakashi catch Sasuke in the face like that… And the blood making red tracks on the other boy's pale skin… The cut had been right below his eye and the way the blood had splattered up before flowing steadily downwards made it seem like it was Sasuke's eye that was bleeding. Sasuke had barely flinched but Naruto had cried. He'd been so scared. Too scared. His eyes moved faster than his mind could process and by the time he'd caught up he was already in tears, his legs were already falling out from under him. He thought something bad was going to happen to Sasuke… He'd been scared and it was so stupid.

In the next room Iruka rolled over on the couch and it creaked under his weight.

Naruto stared up at the dark roof and then rolled over onto his side.

Was it strange to worry and be scared for someone who could obviously take care of themselves more than being concerned for yourself? Sasuke obviously lived alone. When he'd taken him to bed the other night, Naruto had walked around the house looking for a flannel for his forehead. No one else lived in that house. It was too tidy and the other rooms looked dusty from where he'd stood in their doorways. Sasuke was alone and it looked like he had been for sometime… Just like Naruto…

Even so, Sasuke was a ninja and could take care of himself…. Even so… When Kakashi had moved at murderous speed that day, it wasn't terror that he could be next that crossed Naruto's mind. The only thought that could keep up was an eternal scream that shook his whole body.

"_SASUKE SAN!!"_

And then there was the part afterwards. After they left Kakashi. It was this part that was most disturbing to Naruto, the thing that was keeping him awake the most. It was really too "embarrassing", if that was the right word, for the boy to remember more than glimpses of what preceded entering Iruka's house...

"_Naruto, there's no point in cleaning it up. It's only going to keep bleeding. Stop looking at it if it bothers you."_

"_I can't… It's on my hands too…"_

The red of blood, still kind of wet on his fingertips.

Mesmerizing. A horrifically beautiful shade. His hands shook/

"_Were you scared?"_

"_Mmm…"_

The annoying itch of dry tears.

"_Understandable."_

"_Sorry."_

"_Its ok."_

…

"_Stop looking at it."_

"_I can't I said!" _

A sigh.

The flash of Sasuke's white skin in the sunlight.

Sasuke's licking his hand from the corner of Naruto's vision and wiping away most of the blood on his face.

"_Dobe."_

"_Don't call me that…"_

Iruka's house coming into view.

The small bench outside that they sat for a minute on.

A warm encircling his wrist and then…

Sasuke's hot mouth on his fingers and the rasp of his tongue across the bloodied tips.

Naruto had jumped at the strange sensation but Sasuke hadn't stopped. The blonde wondered if he realized that as he tried to pull away, Sasuke tightened his grasp on his wrist.

Sasuke sat quietly in the sun with his eyes closed and sucked Naruto's fingers clean.

Naruto sat next to him, fascinated by Sasuke's tongue around his fingers and felt a blush work its way across his nose and cheeks making his eyes so heavy he had to close them.

Sasuke stopped and both boys opened their eyes. Sasuke blinked and suddenly red streaked up his neck and to his cheeks as he jumped up and backed away as if just realizing what he had done.

"_Ah- Sorry. I just- I mean, you wouldn't stop looking at the blood and it was bothering you… You should go inside. You're still upset."_

Their eyes both fell away from each other.

"_See you later."_

"_M-mm. Bye."_

Sasuke had left in a hurry of smeared red blood and flushed pale skin.

The clock changed to 3:30 and Naruto tried to shake the flutter in his stomach away.

It was something regrettable to be so captivated by another boy, by Sasuke… Naruto knew. He knew that Sasuke was only being familiar with him and he didn't see it as strange and his heart didn't skip beats when they touched, when they smiled together. He didn't feel the same rush when he heard the other boy laugh like when Naruto did with him… He only blushed in response to Naruto's blush because he was uncomfortable with embarrassing the smaller boy with something that seemed normal to him… That was how it was, right?

But despite all of this, Naruto couldn't help that Sasuke was the one who made him feel needed. Sasuke was going to all the trouble to look after him. It wasn't the same care that Iruka had shown him. Sasuke made him feel… necessary, because he had seen his hurt face and heard him call him with that miserable voice when he thought Naruto couldn't hear… Heard him call for someone who was precious to him, someone more precious than the Naruto now could comprehend. And he couldn't help wanting to be that person. It was something regrettable but he couldn't help feeling this way with Sasuke. He couldn't help that some part, even if it were the locked away part. felt a little needed and he couldn't help needing in return. That's why he wanted to get his memories back, He didn't want to hurt or be useless to Sasuke as he was…

"Sasuke san…." Naruto rolled over and bit his lip against the dangerous rise of emotion behind his eyes and knotted his eyebrows into a frown.

Was it all impossible?

One tear rolled across the bridge of his nose.

"Shit."


	25. Chapter 25

_TADAIMA!!~ I have returned! (If anyone cares ;P) How is everyone? Japan was awesome. Anyway, chapter is shortish because I didn't have a whole lot of time but bear with me ok? Thanks to whoever has waited and come this far with the story, you're super cool ^_^  
_

_Enjoy !~  
_

* * *

When Sakura Haruno awoke the sun had already risen high and she was nearly in danger of being late for the training today.

The girl stood in front of her mirror and reached slowly for her Konoha forehead, her eyes never leaving the same green that stared back in the glass. It was eyes that had been fascinating her recently so she took an extra minute to examine her own.

Kakashi would be late anyway.

The eyes of the girl who looked back were sea foam green with tiny flickers of darker green nearer the pupil. They stared strong and focused; quite nice eyes. The eyes of someone who was confident, for the most part. The eyes of someone who was a bit soft though. The green was pale and not particularly shocking. They didn't rage or burn. She was sheltered. But that was... ok. Maybe.

Lee had black eyes. Huge round,, black eyes with thick "spectacular" eyelashes. Of course they were on the verge of being completely terrifying at a fist glance but they were among the most amazing eyes Sakura had seen. It was the variation that those eyes held. They could be intense and burrow into you but they could also be gentle. They could be alive with laughter or pooled with tears. Sakura felt slightly honored to have seen the last one considering the short time they had known each other. Although it didn't take much; a playfully harsh word from another or a touching moment.

The girl smiled, running her fingers over the shape of the leaf in the metal.

Sasuke had black eyes too; tragically black eyes. But with the Uchiha's eyes it was the lack of variation that got her. Sure, she could read Sasuke pretty well but it was more through how he held his body or his mouth rather than the emotion in his eyes. Sasuke tried to hide everything and he was very good at it. Heartbreak was the only thing Sakura had seen raw, because at the time Sasuke was too broken to know what to do with himself. He was a boy who didn't understand his emotions. She had seen that _in his eyes_. But nothing else. Even the boy's anger was usually masked to some degree and sorrow... His pain was always hidden away. There was almost nothing that fit to a word in Uchiha Sasuke's eyes. Only the nothing was familiar and always there but even that emptiness... Sakura had never quite got a grip on what it was or how to get past it.

Her fingertips slid over the cool, clean edge of the forehead protector's plate as she wondered; did Naruto ever know Sasuke's eyes?

Naruto....

Sakura sighed and finally brought her gaze down to the object on her dresser.

Blue...

Naruto had blue eyes; all skitters and fierce smudging when he moved quickly. They dance furiously with blue fire and clashed brilliantly with the bright shade of red his blood always took on in the heat of a battle. They were as unsteady and reckless as the boy himself. But they were strong too. The colour; that cobalt blue. Powerful like Naruto's mere presence. His eyes over anything about him were what you could absolutely never forget.

But Naruto also hadnew blue eyes; steady and smooth. They moved safely and cautiously, a slightly dampened, darker colour. They fitted perfectly with his face and were rarely pushed close by that smile that once distorted his features with its enormity. There new eyes were what had Sakura fascinated.

Windows to the soul...

The other day in the village when she had met Sasuke and Naruto and the Uchiha had left the blonde in her care she had been shocked by those blue eyes. Somehow she had assumed that in time the boy's eyes would lose that darker shade and "bounce right back" into character. She assumed she would know his eyes if nothing else the next time she saw him and they might know her. But that wasn't the case. Not at all. When she thought about it she probably should have expected this. Without the memory of his terrible childhood and the hate he had experienced there was nine of that determination to prove all those people who shunned him, wrong. There was no need to be recognized, to gain respect. No desire to become something better. And without this there wasn't the dream to become Konoha's Hokage and inside that, there was no desperate wanting to be stronger than anyone else. All this was what lit the flames in Uzumaki Naruto eyes.

As they sat across from each other at the lunch table she had realized how different the boy was now. It was like two separate people. His eyes... his voice... the way he said her name. Even though he sat and complained about Sasuke leaving him it wasn't the same as when he had complained to her in the past.

"_Haruno san, are you listening? You're all zoned out." _

That's what he said when he called her now. "Haruno san"... That was really bad. "Sakura chan" was what she was used to. He'd always called her that; even before they were team mates or friends he had been overly familiar with her, intimately addressing her with affectionate "chan".

How... odd. It was all odd. But she'd better get used to it. Naruto was still her friend. That much hadn't changed. She still liked him so she'd better get used to it.

This was forever.

Sakura began tying the forehead protector under her short hair, her eyes falling shut as she did.

Naruto doesn't pull these knots tight in the morning anymore...

She opened her eyes

Naruto doesn't feel this well-known weight anymore...

She admired how the metal shone in the sunlight.

Naruto doesn't know this pride anymore...

She headed for the door.

Naruto doesn't care anymore...

As expected, Kakashi wasn't there when Sakura arrived. Sasuke was there though, perfectly on time as always. They stood in silence and waited until the jounin arrived and handed them one long sword. Today's training was learning to work together at battle pace with limited weapons.

Sasuke and Sakura armed with the sword-"Katetsu", two kunai and two shuriken each, against Kakashi and his clones. There was a little time before to quickly practice and get the feel of wielding a sword. The technique didn't have to be perfect, just effective enough to fend of the shadow Kakashis. The battle began and Sakura and Sasuke fought back to back, side by side and far apart, passing the sword between them as a main form of offense. It was difficult and both young ninja sported a number of wounds by the end of it. Just a slightly off flick of the wrist when passing, a tiny miscalculation could send the blade slicing through the skin of your partner's awaiting arm.

"Building awareness of your teammates and their actions" Kakashi called the exercise.

Sakura called it dangerous. Especially when you had only used a sword a few times and never in a serious training.

The next two hours were spent sparring as normal. Sakura managed to land one clean punch on Sasuke, right in the jaw. It was a punch that earned her a back handed whack to the face that sent her flying and rolling across the dusty, dry forest floor, but one punch none the less. In the days before she had had some training sessions with Lee and apparently they had paid off. Sasuke was surprised- he could tell by the heightened curve of his eyebrows and the way his lips pushed into a tight line. Kakashi complimented her and she despite being completely spent, battered and bruised from the effort of training, she smiled and flushed happily.

She and Sasuke took the same road back into the village.

"Sasuke kun?"

"Hn."

"Want to go swimming?"

"No."

She skipped two steps to match the boy's pace.

"Let's get Naruto and go swimming," Sakura pushed. "We should spend more time together as a three ne?"

There was a moments silence before she saw Sasuke nod.

"I guess. Where did you want to go?"

Sakura grinned.

We can't give each other up so easily.

We have to try.

This is forever...

They ended up at the lake at the foot of the road on the hill that flanked Konoha's most eastern boundary. Sakura sat on sand with her feet in the water, dressed in her underwear and Sasuke's T-shirt. Somehow there wasn't a lot of embarrassment in doing this. Sasuke and Naruto were knee deep in the water in their boxers. Even though she was the one who had suggested doing this together, all she really wanted to do was take the backseat and watch the two together like she always had. Sasuke was slowly moving further out while Naruto stayed closer to shore. It was incredibly nostalgic just to see them within arms length of each other. .

"What are you doing Dobe? Are you coming in or not? It's not cold," called Sasuke. Naruto shivered and replied, "Now that I'm here I'm not so sure if I know how to swim."

"What, the other day you were ready to swim across a river weren't you? Where's that cockiness now?" taunted Sasuke. Sakura thought he was being too hard. How would Naruto know whether he could swim or not... But this was Sasuke and Sasuke was like that.

Naruto took a few steps forward and Sakura watched with a small smile as his fingers flinched and his hand rose a little like it was going to grab Sasuke. Maybe it was his hands that knew the most. They moved without him realizing. Would they move toward her too if she were close enough to the boy?

"Teach me Sasuke san!"

"What no!"

"Yes!"

"No way!"

"Yeeeesss...!!"

"Fine!"

Sasuke waded back in and stood face to face with his friend for a moment, considering the other male before roughly taking Naruto's hands and turned, leading him into the deeper water. Sakura sighed.

That's not how you do it Sasuke kun... You've got to keep eye contact or he's going to feel like he's got no support...

At shoulder depth, Naruto panicked and bolted when his foot slipped and his head went under. Sasuke yelled, Naruto cried out after surfacing; panicked and loud and then retreated back into the shallows. Sasuke dragged a wet palm over his face.

"Naruto! How can I do it when you're running away?"

Sakura got to her feet and came to Naruto's side placing a small hand on his arm. He was whimpering and trembling with either the terror of feeling like he was drowning or with anger over Sasuke yelling at him.

"Naruto, want me to teach you?" suggested Sakura quietly. The blonde turned his blue eyes to her and watched her for a moment before making a small noise signaling "yes".

Sakura lead Naruto by the hands, walking backwards until they were waist deep and near where Sasuke was submerged to his nose and sulking. Naruto's hands hitched up to her elbows and held onto her tighter. She murmured to him softly and they exchanged smiles.

"It's alright Naruto. I'm right here. I won't let anything happen to you," she said kindly. Naruto's eyes flicked to Sasuke further out and then down to his feet where only the tips of his toes brushed the ground. Sakura was on flat feet.

"Sasuke kun?" Sakura called him happily and heard a _splish_ as he lifted his ears above water.

"What."

"Come here." Sasuke came and stood next to her, glaring a little at Naruto. Sakura giggled at how conforming he was being today.

"Take him now. You do the rest." Sasuke tensed and turned his face away.

"You're better at it than I am. You do it."

"But I can't touch the bottom soon. You're taller." That was a lie. Going any further with Naruto just holding on wouldn't be the way to teach him effectively but it felt more appropriate to have Sasuke do it.

Sakura was kind of contradicting herself though. When she first realized how her team mates felt about each other back in the inn she had been sad and scared by it, thinking that she might be left out or cast away as they came to realize just how much they cared for one another... But now all she wanted was them to be together as much as possible. She wanted to support them. Maybe it was because she saw a little more of stubborn Naruto when he was nearer Sasuke. Or because there was a little more life to Sasuke when he was with Naruto, even in this form... They made each other the people she loved.

Sasuke sighed and opened his arms. Naruto looked doubtful. Sakura began to wriggle her arms from Naruto's tight grasp. When they were only holding hands again Naruto's breath was panicky and short.

Only fingers now.

Naruto made and awkward leap at Sasuke and grabbed him around the neck.

"Don't fall Sasuke kun!" yelled Sakura as the Uchiha boy toppled a little and then regained balance, a tiny frown gracing his features as he wrapped his arms around Naruto who was still clinging to Sasuke's neck, his legs clamped around his slim waist.

"You can get down a bit now Dobe," muttered Sasuke. Naruto took a long minute before lifting his head and shakily moved out until he was holding Sasuke at the elbows as he had with Sakura, his legs desperately treading water, trying to boost more of his body out of the water.

"There. You good?"

"Yeah..."

Two pairs of eyes turned to Sakura; blue and black.

"Now what?" asked Sasuke. Sakura blinked.

"You should teach him to float on his back," she replied. "Naruto lie on your back and Sasuke you stand next to him with your arms under him. When he's ready take them away. Slowly. Be brave." She didn't know who the last little comment was directed at.

They followed her instructions. Naruto lay back and lowered his head into the water and squeezed his eyes shut. His body was tense.

"Do you trust Sasuke kun, Naruto?" murmured Sakura standing near his head, her hands cupping tiny wisps of his downy, blonde hair so it floated above her palm. He couldn't hear her with his ears beneath the water's surface though she felt Sasuke's eyes on her briefly.

They stayed for a long minute. Just stayed. Sasuke holding Naruto, his palms and forearms flat under the other boy's body. Naruto lying ninja still in the clear water, the only sign of life being the muscle at his jaw working as he clenched and unclenched his jaw. Sakura with her fingers in Naruto's ghostly blonde hair; unnoticed. Sasuke watched Naruto and Sakura watched Sasuke.

Ah... His eyes... Despite his earlier complaining Sasuke's eyes...

_...black..._

The look in them was like he was dying to be closer, to hold Naruto. A soft, smoldering desire. Was it wrong to assume that he missed _his _Naruto? That he could be dying to kiss him while the smaller blonde boy lay in his arms? His eyes, full and forgiving, completely new, brimmed with a part of his past that he didn't mind reliving. Right now the policy was honesty with Uchiha Sasuke's features. Nothing was censored.

He wasn't empty and it amazed Sakura. He was breathtaking. They; as a pair, as two, as one, as Sasuke and Naruto...Were breathtaking.

It was peaceful.

Sasuke removed his hands.

Naruto floated.

All three were whole in that one moment.

Something a bit like a miracle and once they were done in the water they all flopped down in a line in the long grass on the bank's slope.

Sakura closed her eyes and fell to sleep with the tiny lap of the water in the breeze at the lake shore and the smell of the afternoon sun warming her hair, Naruto and Sasuke either side of her.


	26. Chapter 26

_Yay! Chapter 26 (O_O so long!) Man, school is kicking my butt right now but I'll try to get the next chapter up within a humane amount of time. =_= I get edgy if I don't do it within a set amount of time lol. I don't know about this chapter but I'm happy if you can enjoy it. Dedicated to **razor 0603** for all his help. ^_^_

_Sore ja!~_

* * *

Awakening for the second time that day, Sakura found herself lying in the same position she had fallen asleep in. Alone.

Ah, no, not alone.

On a second scan of her dimly lit surroundings Sasuke was there too; down by the lake on the dock with his feet in the water in just his shorts. Right, she still had his shirt on.

And Naruto? She cast around for him.

Up on the road, not too far away; a dark figure against the dusky colours of the sky and trees in the back drop, making his way slowly along the grassy edge of the path that ran right along the top of the rise as far as the eye could see. From what she could see he was looking straight ahead and walking at normal pace but as he neared his features became more defined in and he turned his face towards the lake, his feet slowing. Sakura turned to look too.

It was Sasuke that Naruto was looking at right?

Sasuke down on that lonely dock dangling his feet in the water causing the only noise to be heard.

_Slosh. Slosh. _

Sakura looked back to Naruto. He had completely stopped at the top of the hill, straight up from where she was lying at where the slope curved into flat. His face was sad as he gazed to the other boy. Sakura's heart ached as she watched him though confused as to why Naruto might wear such a face. Did something happen with the boys or something recently?

The sloshing stopped. Green eyes spun to meet black ones that stared straight over her head and up to the blue in the distance. Sasuke was looking over his shoulder, scowling lightly but Sakura felt the two boy's lock in the air between them; around her. It was much more than their eyes connecting now. Even though Naruto couldn't possibly understand how much today had meant, there was an understanding as they stared at each other over the top of her. She was merely a spectator watching something sad and nostalgic, something they somehow both understood to some extent.

She'd been a spectator all day and she had been happy to be. It didn't bother her anymore to be the one in the back because honestly, she would have absolutely no idea how to lead Sasuke and Naruto right now. She wondered if either boy saw her at all right now.

Sasuke broke away first, beginning to turn his face back to the water and Sakura looked back to Naruto to see what he would do.

At first he did nothing. As Sasuke's face turned he kept watching but as soon as the Uchiha boy was all the way turned back a new expression sprang to his features.

Wide eyes

Mouth hanging open in a small 'o'.

Eyebrows pulled together into a shocked face.

What was that? Why? Sakura didn't understand for a moment but then it hit her. Her stomach swooned with excitement or nervousness as she sat up and stared at the blonde.

Could Naruto possibly...? It was impossible right...? But... but... Naruto was impossible. Everything about him defied the laws of logic... why start being normal now, right...?

Was it possible that that face meant... Could he be... No... No... No! Yes!

"SASUKE KUN!~"

The scene turned slow motion... Sakura jumped to her feet, screaming for Sasuke. The boy started at his name and got to his feet too and as soon as he saw. They both rushed into a sprint in Naruto's direction; achingly slow as they watch the blonde boy's eyes flicker wildly from side to side as if trying to comprehend something neither of his team mates saw and then stood stock still, his body rigid and then... He was falling, his body already starting to drop to its knees.

Within their bodies, the chakra was muddled and uncontrollable; neither could run fast enough.

Naruto's fingers brushed the grass. His body would be next. Sakura's arms came out instinctively to catch him though she was still too far away. Sasuke's breathing was loud as it came ragged through his mouth beside to her.

If he fell...

If their baby fell...

If Naruto fell...

If his blue, confused eyes closed...

If his body hit the ground...

If his tiny feather light memory was...

One shoulder came to the ground but right before contact there was a flash of combat green and silver and Naruto's falling form was spirited away. Both Sasuke and Sakura fell over themselves on the slope as time caught up. The grass was still twilight tan.

Kakashi.

Did his eyes close...?

Was his memory...?

Did he...?

Their mentor had stolen him away before they could see.

Now what?

Where to now?

Stay? Go?

She struggled to catch her too fast breath.

Sasuke swore quietly and Sakura looked to him on his hands and knees just as she was.

"He was..." murmured the boy to the girl and she hummed a soft response back.

"Where do you think he took Naruto?" she asked carefully. Sasuke got to his feet as she spoke. He didn't reply as he turned and walked shakily back to the dock and Sakura watched him as he went and plunged himself into the water, still warm from the heat of the sun.

"Sasuke kun..."

She waited on the dock for a long time. Sasuke swam under the water, coming up for breath and then down again. When the sun had completely set he came close to Sakura's feet that were dipped in the water making the same _slosh_ noise, and floated with only his head bobbing up between her calves. Thinking? Moments passed. And then he left. Just like that, without a word he upped himself onto the dock and walked away, collecting his neatly folded shirt from the dry grass that Sakura had long shed and traded for her mucky red dress. She shivered. It was suddenly cold.

Had today been bad or good?

.

Just as he suspected, Kakashi had taken Naruto to the hospital. When he asked at the desk for "Uzumaki Naruto" the nurses looked edgy. They exchanged glances and then told him he was unable to see visitors presently. Sasuke had huffed to himself and demanded the room number, fixing the poor woman with one of his glares. She had conformed and now he sat outside room number 211 with his head in his hands and his elbows on his knees. He'd been there quite some time; so long that when he lifted his elbows he found two spots of skin that were slowly turning from red to a charming shade of purple bruising from the weight of his heavy head.

The door across from him was shut and had been as long as he had there. At least it was giving him time. Scratch that. He didn't know if he wanted that time. He was anxious. His inside's swirled with uncertainty. Just what had happened? One minute he was watching his reflection in the rippling water and the next Sakura's voice was yelling for him and then they were running and Naruto was falling and Sasuke's mind was just... Gone.

And then Kakashi took him away without a word, without a smile or a frown. Without any sign to the two about what was going on with to the blonde.

Was it bad? Good? How serious was it? "It"; what was "it"? Everything that had happened in the last few hours was short and restrained in his mind. Limited information about everything. He didn't understand anything. He was grabbing at nothing as he sat outside the hospital room trying to fit things together.

The door clicked and Sasuke's head shot up quicker than he'd liked it to. He was desperate again with no control over how he moved unless thinking it through first. It could be good news right? Kakashi could just be being over protective? Maybe Naruto got some memory without any damage?

He was afraid and he hated it.

The jounin stood before him in the quietness of the corridor.

"Sasuke." He acknowledged him but made no move; physical or verbal. Sasuke shakily took the lead.

"How is he?"

"Sleeping." Neither brought up the fact that Kakashi had been tailing them after training.

"What happened?"

"Nothing."

"What do you mean 'nothing'." The boy wanted to yell but he didn't have it in him.

"Nothing."

"What did you do then?" Sasuke took one step forward and then backed off. Getting any closer to someone he "trusted" would put him in danger of becoming pathetic. Kakashi's response came calm and emotionless. Sasuke didn't notice how the older man's hands shook at his sides.

"I stabilized him."

"And the memory?"

"There was none."

"But... at the lake he was... he looked like he was..."

"Nothing came back Sasuke."

"I was sure that-!"

"Sasuke!" The boy drew back like Kakashi's voice had hit him across the face. Kakashi drew back too.

"I'll tell you 'what happened' OK?" The boy could only nod.

"There was no memory, only the push of one. He remembered nothing, he just got overwhelmed but I had to bring him back here to check everything was still OK. I went inside his head again and checked. I stabilized him. He got nothing back Sasuke and he never will. That is absolute. That's the reality that you need to accept."

Silence. Kakashi put his hand on Sasuke's shoulder.

"I'm sorry Sasuke. He was unconscious as soon as he felt the pressure of whatever was trying to come to him. "

"His eyes were open."

"He was unconscious. I'm sorry."

"Shut up," replied Sasuke snatching his shoulder away and storming past Kakashi into the hospital room. The jounin made no move to stop him.

Inside the room it was like a different world. In the hallway the walls had been black with anxiety and his horror at his own feelings. Here there was almost a serene feel to the atmosphere. The curtains were closed, darkening the bright light from the moon through the clouds, turning the white of the hospital dusty blue. Naruto lay in his bed, asleep.

Sasuke sat down in the chair next to the bed only to get to his feet again to look over the boy before him. Apart from under his eyes being slightly shadowed he looked fine, sleeping peacefully with his lips parted just so, his near blond eyelashes lying still, his funny whiskers straight and perfect. Sasuke just stood and looked at him.

When he was asleep it was the best time for them. Or maybe it was the worst. When Naruto was asleep he was simply a body no different than he had been the last time he had muttered "Teme" or held a kunai. Seeing _him_, _his Naruto _somehow calmed Sasuke but at the same time it was a bit more than he could handle; having the body of Naruto lying there and resisting the horrifically devastating urge to shake him awake and the need to find him the same. However as soon as he awoke he was the new Naruto. It was soothing to be with him but it was also suffocating.

The pitter patter of rain started and there was a flash of lightning and a short moment later, the rumble of thunder somewhere not so far off. Sasuke turned his face to the window and listened. Thunder and lightning had always made him think of battles. His and Naruto's more specifically; they were most explosive. The sound of punches and kicks connecting, the noise magnified by the thrill of the battle, the zapping through his body every time he landed an attack. Thunder and lightning; he and Naruto were a lot like them. Naruto with his super heated temper that would go off at any moment making him run his mouth off without any thought what so ever and then the effect of even the simplest things that would calm him, much like rapid cooling only to strike again not too long after. And then there was Sasuke, he was like that too, he could snap when pushed and it was volatile at times, his harsh, hot headed words or his cool and sharp comebacks. Up and down.

But now the exploding thunder and the white shock of lightning against the calm, blue walls as it pierced through the curtains only served to cause a sour unsettled feeling in the pit of his stomach, especially the thunder; it shook him to his core, making him unbalanced. The dark haired boy moved his eyes back to Naruto, seeking solace or painful distraction in his presence.

So quiet, so still...

Sasuke brushed the hair out of the other boy's eyes gently. He didn't stir from his coma like sleep. He touched his eyelashes and soft eyebrows, the skin around his lips, traced his jaw line. He wouldn't awake to find Sasuke next to him this time; no one would find him like this. Not Kakashi, not Sakura. The touches became more desperate until he was holding Naruto's face in his hands, one knee up on the bed.

"Uzumaki Naruto... What are you doing to me?"

Even though Uchiha Sasuke would never ever be coaxed into bed with someone else... this was different. This was his choice... Although, he wasn't sure he was comfortable with the idea that he was voluntarily lifting himself onto the small space next to the sleeping form and nestling himself half under the blanket. He laid with his face close to Naruto's, a hand that he couldn't control, resting atop the blonde's stomach beneath the covers. He breathed in deeply through his mouth and then through his nose. It was not until this moment that Sasuke had been able to place Naruto's scent. Usually he couldn't to really smell it at all; he was that used to it but in places where it was heightened and he had struck it, he had never been able place it. But now, in this hospital he could; honeysuckle, soft and milky with sleep. So incredibly nostalgic it made him ache. This was bad. But no one would come and Naruto wouldn't wake and see him falling apart.

Sasuke brought his mouth to the place where Naruto's neck curved into his shoulder and nearly cried out at how warm he was, at the familiar scent of his hair and skin. Pressing his lips to the side of the boy's throat, his hand moved under the hospital dressing gown, up past his underwear and to his stomach. He grit his teeth, willing himself to pull away, to get up and leave, but there was not enough of whatever he needed to stop. Naruto was so warm and his bare flesh beneath Sasuke's fingers...God... So soft, so warm... It was breaking him, tearing him apart but it felt so good to be so close again that the Uchiha couldn't stop himself lifting his face and kiss the corner of the smaller boy's mouth softly. He climbed onto his elbows and knees, one hand at Naruto's jaw, one still moving slowly over his stomach. The boy breathed evenly beneath him, his chest rising and falling in steady rhythm. He was so soft and so warm that Sasuke couldn't help moving to kiss him fully, struggling to stifle a moan of anguish at the petal soft feel of Naruto's mouth against his own, the taste of him. He couldn't help but kiss him again; softly again and then harder, again and again until his own lips throbbed with the beat of his racing heart. It hurt so much. He breathed all over the sleeping boy's neck, nuzzling his nose into the safe smell and warmth.

It hurt but he couldn't help it.

He couldn't help touching him without permission.

He couldn't help kissing him.

He couldn't help needing him.

He couldn't help the tears that stung in his eyes nor could he help tangling himself with unconscious Naruto, exhausted by nothing and giving up his pride in that little, dusty blue hospital room, the thunder and lightning battling overhead.

Kakashi...

I can't accept this reality; I have enough sense to know that I can't go on without him. I can't let him go.

Naruto...

What do you plan to accomplish in making me even more painfully taken by you? I can't leave you alone. You piss me off and make me so angry, but there is nothing but you, all the time... Even now, even when you don't know who you _were,_ you know who you are just like you always did. You're that kid who does whatever he wants all on his own, your that boy who won't drop something until there is an answer, a resolution; always the hero in every situation, big or small. The one who always has a smile for everyone. You're the person who made me love. Damn you for it. Damn you.

I love you so much and I hate it.

Sasuke fell to sleep, not caring about what tomorrow would or wouldn't bring. There was just him and Naruto.

.

Kakashi returned early in the morning to the hospital while it was still dark and found Sasuke curled up against Naruto, his arms all snaked around the blond, his hand slipped inside the hospital night gown. The silver man sighed and moved forward to touch Sasuke's shoulder. He woke immediately.

"I knew you'd still be here," he said softly as Sasuke sat up in bed.

"Sasuke."

"What?"

"You need to leave. I don't even want to know what you were doing with him while he's unconscious but its not gonna be good if he wakes up with you all over him." The young ninja scowled and slowly removed himself from the bed.

"Sasuke."

"What?"

"I didn't tell the Hokage about what happened today."

"Are you allowed to do that?"  
"No."

"Then why?" Sasuke was standing near the window now, staring out a crack in the curtains that Kakashi had created coming through them. Visiting hours had finished. A strip of his pale skin was illuminated by the weak light outside revealing the remains of tear tracks long since dried.

"Sasuke."

"Stop saying my name."

"Sasuke."

"What."

"Because you're precious to me and so is Naruto and Sakura too."

"Whatever." The boy's voice held a vicious bite to it even at its lowered night time volume. He was very different to the person he had spoken to in the hallway hours before. That Sasuke had tried to reason with him, insisting upon something he was sure he saw. But now he didn't care and obviously didn't want to talk to anyone.

"I've never had anyone this close to me. You three are special. If I had reported you, you two wouldn't be able to get near Naruto again. You're a danger to him and essentially the village. But I didn't report you"

"Like I care."

"Sasuke"

"What is it!?" he hissed.

"You should stop seeing Naruto."

"No."

"It's for your own good."

"Not your call, _Sensei_"

Sasuke turned to him and raised his chin, waiting for Kakashi's comeback.

"You don't want this life Sasuke." At this, the younger male recoiled and dropped his head, his dark, moonlight-glossy bangs falling over his hurt eyes.

"No shit..." he muttered. "You think I want him? Because I don't... I don't want him at all!" He lifted his head slightly, his jaw chin trembled. "But if I didn't _need_ him I would have left him alone a long time ago!" Sasuke's voice pitched up and bounced of the walls in a yell, his shoulders rising toward his ears and then lowering as he collected himself. As always, Sasuke showed little and then closed himself up again. Although the time when Sasuke had bared all after finding out about Naruto's memory being erased had terrified Kakashi, he still sometimes wished Sasuke was more honest with himself.

Naruto didn't stir from his sharingan induced sleep.

There was a long time where neither ninja said a thing. Sasuke was looking out the window and Kakashi was watching Naruto.

"Sasuke." The boy turned to him, a strong glare etched on his features, his eyes hard, mouth turned down at the corners, jaw set.

"What," he snarled.

"You look like you're about to cry."

"Shut up, just... shut up..."


	27. Chapter 27

_Hnnnng~~~~ I have recently learned that I have mock exams next week so I won't be able to write *never studies so she has to cram* I'll post as soon as I can_ =_=

_Lucky this one isn't a big cliffhanger or anything ;P Don't kill me for the filleryness. Thanks to everyone who reviews! You make my day.  
_

_Enjoy! Till next time,_

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In his dream, Naruto was standing by the river that Sasuke had carried him dripping wet and heavy across on his back. By the bank there was black bunny with small flecks of white on its chest and around its muzzle. Naruto and the rabbit watched each other for a while and then he took a step forward. The bunny didn't bolt, rather it took one little hop forward but Naruto noticed its hop was a bit sad and slow.

"What's wrong with you little guy?" asked Naruto as he dropped to his haunches. The rabbit looked up at him when he reached out and touched its strangely pink nose with the tip of his finger.

"I'm sick," replied the bunny and for some odd reason it was perfectly fine for this animal to be speaking human language. Naruto cocked his head to the side and considered the creature, his eyes touching the white speckles with his gaze. The bunny weakly lifted a foot and scratched its ear with its long slender limb. Naruto hummed questioningly.

"What kind of sick?"

"Love sick."

"Isn't that a good kind of sick?" inquired Naruto. To this the rabbit sat up on its hind legs, its tiny little front paws tucked tight up against his fluffy chest only to sway slightly and have to come back to its four legged position.

"Shouldn't being lovesick mean you've fallen in love, shouldn't that make you happy? Isn't that a good thing?" Asked Naruto.

"Not at all..." replied the bunny distantly. Naruto patted the top of his ears, wondering how he had come across such a politely spoken animal just sitting by the riverside. There was a long moment where neither of them spoke. Naruto and the rabbit sat in the quiet listening to the river bubble.

"Here being lovesick is just how it sounds; sick because of love," said the bunny suddenly making Naruto start as it broke the silence. "And I have become lovesick..." The boy looked to the tiny ball of black fur, his face expressing his concern. Sick because of love?

"That's terrible."

"Isn't it just. She is so beautiful and I love her so but now we have both become lovesick, we've both become weak... Is there someone you love, Boy?" Naruto bit his lip as Sasuke jumped to his mind, his dark eyes invading the blonde's head. Was it the same thing? The rabbit was talking about a girl rabbit right? Did his very unsure feelings for Sasuke count the same? Were feelings from a boy towards another boy the same as those from a boy to a girl or vice versa? There was no one else around so it was fine to not deny anything in his head. He had feelings for Sasuke. Probably. Briefly, he turned the idea of his semi easy acceptance of this being down to the fact he had so little life experience. Naruto thought his response over slowly before answering.

"There is. A little." The little rabbit moved out from under Naruto's hand and hopped close to his human companion.

"Let me tell you something before you come to love that person so much you can't bear to part from them." He hopped onto his hind legs and Naruto put a large hand behind his back so that he wouldn't fall again, his thumb coming around to support his small furry front. The bunny nodded his thanks and Naruto frowned at how he could feel his straightened spine against his fingers. He really was sick.

"For two beings who love each other... being together does not always bring the greatest happiness... Be careful with what you choose..."

The dream ended there and Naruto slipped into consciousness.

His eyelids were nearly too heavy to lift. The sun was warm on his face and the bed was so comfortable. He didn't want to move.

"... fine mind from what I hear too." The voice was that of someone trying to make conversation. Naruto opened his eyes and let the daylight flood his vision as he drank in the hospital scene. Sakura was there by the window, her fingertips at the stems of a bunch of daffodils. Tsunade was there too, standing next to her as she looked out the window. Her crème bur lee eyes moved to Sakura's hands as the pink haired girl arranged the flowers somewhat timidly.

"Steady hands too."

"Ah... Thank you..." replied Sakura and Naruto took the silence that followed as his cue to speak up.

"Haruno san, Baa chan, good morning." Both females turned to him and Sakura's face broke into a relieved smile as he hurried to his side.

"Naruto, how are you?" she bubbled to him, her hand near his as she leant over his lying down form. She seemed eager for something. Naruto couldn't think what.

"Naruto, how are you?" echoed Tsunade but somehow it seemed more clinical coming from her as she came close to the bed.

"Fine," replied Naruto smiling nervously at her as she picked up his chart and flicked through it.

"So it seems," said Tsunade shortly and then felt his forehead, her fingers gently moving his fringe off his face, her long red painted nails trailing in a way that was almost soothing across his skin.

"Is he alright to go home Tsunade sama?" The question came from Sakura and the way she talked so formally to the older woman made Naruto think of the bunny from his dream...

"Not yet. He can stay in here and rest for the day then he can go. I'll get you some breakfast brought in." Naruto smiled a little as Tsunade straightened up and headed for the door with a small bow to both him and Sakura. He inclined his head in return and Sakura bowed, bending at the waist and remaining there until the woman had left and the clack of her heels dampened as the door clicked closed.

"Do you remember what happened yesterday?" asked Sakura as she cast around for a chair and dragged it closer to the bed so she could sit. Naruto opened his mouth to reply but a nurse with an unnaturally tall table came wheeling in the door. Both teens watched her as she pushed it up over the bed until it came to rest in front of the boy in bed. They waited until she had finished unpacking his breakfast to talk again.

"Yesterday..." started Naruto as he split his chopsticks. "Yesterday we went swimming and then you slept and I went for a walk and then..." he paused with a chopstick in each hand and then laughed breathily. "Actually that's all I remember. Why am I in the hospital Haruno san?" How odd. It hadn't even occurred to him. How had he got here? He looked to the girl beside him. Her face was knotted loosely into a frown, a soft look of disappointment water washing her sea foam eyes. She smiled when she caught him watching.

"You uh... collapsed at the river. Kakashi sensei brought you here." She was hiding something but Naruto didn't push it because what she said next invoked a very strange feeling.

_"Sasuke kun was really worried I think"_

Warmth seeped through Naruto. Like weak sunlight. He couldn't decide if it was happy or sad. All of a sudden Sasuke's name was... warm and nostalgic. Warm like affection but somehow it held an underlying sadness. But still the light flutter of understanding something that he couldn't remember made him drop the chopsticks all of a sudden. It was different to the normal warmth he had with Sasuke related matters. It was still safe but this time... more. Like he had remembered only a feeling. A feeling from a time he forgot, found and lost...

Sasuke was... Sasuke is... his name, any thought of him was warm and so soft that Naruto could nearly cry.

"Haruno san."

"What is it? Are you alright?" He lifted his face to her, his clear summer blue eyes searching her with unusual intensity for a moment and then easing off.

"Nothing... Was he? I see." Naruto crossed his legs and picked up his first mouth full, feeling self conscious as Sakura kept watching him. He chewed as slowly as he could; trying to eat politely. When he was done he placed the chopsticks and bowl to one side and turned to her. He had been thinking.

"Haruno san?" He said again.

"Yeah?" She turned to him and smiled. He smiled back.

"Why did I collapse yesterday." She tensed.

"You can tell me. I don't feel any different from yesterday so it's ok to tell me something that changed nothing." Well, almost nothing. Nothing to do with her or anyone else for that matter. Just him and Sasuke. Well, just him. Sasuke wasn't... he didn't also...

Sakura came to the foot of the bed and Naruto backed up again as she climbed onto the end and sat across the table from him. She was serious all of a sudden. It was slightly unnerving. But she couldn't hold it for long because as he watched she looked down to her hands and smiled sadly.

"You were standing up on the hill and Sasuke kun was on the dock and you were watching each other and... you just sort of... fell." She looked up to see whether he understood. Which he didn't. How frustrating. He tried not to frown.

"Why?" he asked feeling pushy. She blinked.

"Honestly... I thought you looked like you were in the middle of remembering something." Naruto's eyes went wide.

"That's...that's..." He voice caught in his throat because it was becoming slowly clear why he felt different.

"I know," replied Sakura.

"Haruno san."

"Yeah."

"I did remember something." She was still and she stared.

"Wha..." He put his hands up to stop her.

"Well kind of. What I mean is that I think I remembered a feeling that might match with a memory or something like that..." Naruto trailed off, realizing he wasn't making much sense.

"That's crazy."

"Yeah."

"Do you really think that?" she asked. Naruto was self conscious again. That was a bit direct. He drew himself into his shoulders as he "Mhhmmed" a reply, hoping that if that was wrong and just completely stupid Sakura wouldn't hear him.

"Its just you said I was looking at Sasuke when I was remembering and suddenly... when I think about him and when I hear his name I feel... sort of... warm. I feel like there is something stronger in our bond..."

"Naruto."

"Hm?"

"What do you think of Sasuke kun?" There is was again, that warm watery nostalgic affection seeping through him. It was almost like being what he imagined homesickness would feel like.

"What do I think of him? He's..." Sakura watched him.

"He's... my... we're..." Naruto's breath escaped, brushing through his lips. What was with this feeling? It was something like happiness, no doubt. But somehow, it made him long and ache. For what he wasn't sure. For Sasuke? For something he and Sasuke were? For his past? What was Sasuke to him...? The person that he... His... The only...

"Do you like him?"

"Huh?"

"Do you like Sasuke kun?"

"Of course I do. He's my best friend isn't he?"

"I see." They sat in quiet. And then more quiet.

"Is there someone you love?" Sakura's voice came quietly across the table.

That was direct again. And sort of unsettling. Her voice was the same as the black and white bunny from his dream. Kind of... wary. Maybe not the same wary though. She seemed to be anxious about his reaction.

"I don't know... Is there some one that you love Haruno san." Naruto understood now why she had spoken quite nervously, quietly. It was something to be careful with; this question.

_'Who is it you love the most?'_

Sakura smiled and it put him at ease. After all, she knew him better and appeared more comfortable with him than he, who had such little experience with her, was in return to her.

"You could say that."

"That's nice."

"Yeah... It is." The girl's eyes filled with light as she sat with her face in her palms, leaning on the table and Naruto wanted to tell her how she pretty she looked. A smile, a true smile. Maybe the first he had seen from Haruno Sakura. However, her happiness only made him think of how confused he was and how much it was starting to hurt; not knowing what to do with himself... Surely, it wasn't like the bunny had said? That was just a dream.

_"For two beings who love each other... being together does not always bring the greatest happiness..."_

Was it impossible? The feelings that he had for Sasuke...? Would nothing come from the fascination he had with the other boy?

Naruto shook his head and then dropped it into the nest his arms made on the surface in front of him, pushing his nose into the nothing scent of his own skin.

"Naruto?" Sakura's voice floated light and smooth and the sun was soft like a blanket on his back. She sounded concerned. He wanted to sleep. If only his heart would stop beginning to race as a thought crossed his mind again.

"Ne, Haruno san... Do you think... that boy for boy feelings are the same as girl for boy or boy for girl feelings?" Naruto asked with his head down, embarrassment burning his ears. He heard her tense.

"I think... it's the same. It's still love right? Boy and boy or girl and girl or boy and girl... It's the person that you like, not the gender."

"Mmmm... Won't he think it's gross; me thinking of him like that?" Both knew who Naruto was referring to. Sakura put her hand on his head and ruffled his thick tresses fondly.

"There's nothing gross about you." He kept his head down as Sakura rubbed her fingers in his hair.

"You know, Sasuke kun has a lot of admirers and he's heard "I like you" so many times that it must be just annoying now... But. He always looks different when he's with you and always looks kind of offended whenever anyone else touches you." Slowly Naruto lifted one side of his head and watched the girl in front of him as she looked out the window again, her hand still on his head.

That's right. That first day when he and Sasuke had met Inuzuka Kiba and Hyuuga Hinata on the street Kiba had been so friendly and touched Naruto easily. For the most part, Naruto had just basked in the feeling of having someone drape his arm over him in such a "we're mates" manner. He liked Kiba a lot. However, at one point Naruto had looked back for the briefest of moments and Sasuke had this look on his face like some one had said or done something very rude to him. His mouth was pulled down at the corners, his eyes on the ground. He had been scowling something terrible. Naruto remembered that face making him very curious, but only for a second before Kiba poked his cheek, drawing his attention back.

"Its like only he is allowed to say anything to you. Even if its bad stuff. He always looks like he might jump in and protest if someone other than him is scolding you. I think that it's true that Sasuke is sick of confessions but... "Sakura turned to him, a serious look on her cute face. "If it's from you, I think he would be happy to hear how you feel. It's better to live your life out loud, especially when you're a ninja. Somehow you'll be better off. You should let him know. I don't think he will push you away. "

Naruto smiled gratefully. His body was slightly lighter with relief.

Sasuke san...

"Thanks Haruno san. Maybe I will."

…

Kakashi spent the whole day at briefing. His mission preparation had been held early since Naruto had been in the hospital all day so Sasuke couldn't do anything. The Hokage had called him in and told him that the last day left before he set out would be used for his own preparation, whatever that may be. It was the jounin's first high rank mission in quite some time and he'd be accompanying a few ANBU too that he had met today.

It had been somewhat awkward. They regarded him with their masks on and their chins raised like they were so much better, unaware of the name "Hatake Kakashi" meaning anything more than a particularly skilled _jounin._ Stupid code names. It made him angry to be thought lowly of but he had smiled a bit to himself. Both looked fairly young as far as he could see. If he had still been part of the ANBU they would have been his juniors and more respectful; he'd show them.

Right now it was late at night and Kakashi was taking a walk. Once again, even though when he became a team leader he swore he wouldn't become too attached, that he would only do what he could in the field of shinobi training, he was walking past Sakura's house to check her bedroom light was off. And once again he was turning down the all too familiar road that lead into the Uchiha compound and stood at the edge of the area, wondering what Sasuke was doing; sleeping peacefully or having another nightmare. Or maybe not asleep at all. All were possible. Kakashi walked to Naruto's house too and saw the light on. Uneasiness bubbled somewhere at the base of the silver haired man's throat. Was Naruto still unsettled inside the apartment? All alone...

Damn.

This is what he hadn't wanted when he took on Team 7. To worry, to care how they were when they weren't together. To know things other than the exact style of their fighting, every jutsu they knew, the accuracy of their kunai and shuriken, how fast they could set a trap. Of course he did know that too.

Naruto was, no, _had _been a clumsy fighter but he was strong which bought him time to think of the next move while his opponent was falling from a strong punch or a sturdy kick. He wasn't great with shuriken but decent with kunai which he preferred to use because of that. His specialty was the kage bushin no jutsu and he had next to no idea how to set a well hidden, effective trap without help.

Sasuke was a brilliant fighter who could think fast and deliver well placed clean attacks which is where his power branched from rather than pure brute strength alone. Brute strength he had plenty of too but he didn't have the chakra Naruto had to keep thrashing until something landed. He was smart; a genius and his shuriken accuracy was perfect. His kunai use was the same. He favoured fire jutsu like most of the Uchiha clan but his best skill was no doubt the sharingan. His trap work wasn't bad but sometimes it was a bit messy from a jounin's point of view.

Sakura was weak. She was quick because of her precise chakra control but had next to nothing on a bigger, stronger, opponent. However, lately she was improving with her taijutsu and she also had budding genjutsu skill to rely on when in trouble. Her weapon use was accurate and nearly perfect. Her trapping was the best of the three and highly sophisticated because of the head on her shoulders. Tactics was also one of her strong points.

Kakashi knew all this but he also knew other things.

Naruto loves ramen more than anything in the whole world and hates reading.

Sasuke always has his rice plain and doesn't like hot springs much. He's always out first.

Sakura refuses to wear black ninja shoes while wearing a blue forehead protector and has a soft spot for dango.

Damnit. He hadn't wanted this but now he had it and now... he was going to miss them a bit while on his mission. He was going to worry.

Tomorrow Kakashi would spend the day at home with his Icha Icha Paradise; maybe keep Pakkun for a bit of quiet company. And then he would leave the next day, show those juniors what he was made of... and try not too worry, praying no one did anything stupid while he was away.

Sasuke especially.


	28. Chapter 28

_Heee~~y! I'm back ^_^ Sorry for the wait!~ Exams are over (for now, there's still finals). Omg. This chapter... Don't kill mee~  
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_Kissies to everyone reviews ^3^ Love youu~_

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Sasuke stood at the edge of the Uchiha compound. Konoha had changed its mind on the weather again and by mid morning it was drizzling but still warm. Humid. It was like that day they had trained with Kakashi. Seemed so long ago...

Where do I even want to go?

The boy kicked the ground and pushed his hands into his already moist pockets.

To Naruto?

He wasn't even sure whether he could handle Naruto without getting embarrassed beyond belief. Last time they had been together Naruto had been sleeping and Sasuke had...

He took one step and then another. Maybe he'd just wander and see where his feet took him.

In the hazy drizzle Sasuke spotted pink as he passed the small, open front café on the main street. Sakura was sitting inside with a plate of dango and a book in hand, watching him. She waved but didn't beckon him. He went over anyway and she looked surprised for a moment before she smiled warmly and moved from the middle of her bench to the side so he could sit too, which he didn't. Sasuke didn't even know why he came over but a strange calm washed over him when he entered her presence, pushing away an anxious unease he hadn't realized he had been feeling. He just stood and she went back to her book.

Somehow he had reached out to her at some point through all this and she had become his stability, even if she didn't know it. He used to be able to keep himself safe because Naruto was the one who was reckless and shaky; unstable. But ever since the beginning of everything lately he had felt unsafe and a little bit scared and it was her, her who was honest and wouldn't hide or lie, at least not to him, who had been keeping him safe. How very strange. And sort of funny how much he suddenly wanted her near when in the past she had been annoying and fake. But now.

Sasuke watched the girl from the corner of his eye, taking in her concentrated face as she read and tracked her small hands as they reached for the stick of her last dango. She was natural and he was happy that she was not conscious of him like she had been before as a "rabid fangirl". She'd grown up and become more mature than either of her male team mates.

"I like being with you," he murmured accidentally out loud and was caught off guard when Sakura lifted her face to him, fearing she'd misunderstand.

"I like being with you too," she smiled and he felt embarrassed.

"No... I mean, not like..." She knew didn't she? That he and Naruto were... At the hospital she had said it.

"_You love him so much"_

"No, I like being with you," she repeated. Sasuke bit his lip, feeling uncertain, his eyes skittering away from hers. He was open right now and he wasn't sure he hated it.

"Even though I like Naruto?" He asked in a shuddering breathy voice, surprising himself that he could bare his feelings so easily. She didn't miss a beat or hesitate in her answer.

"Yup. Me and you aren't you and Naruto or me and Naruto. Just because you like Naruto doesn't mean we can't be friends. It doesn't mean I don't like your company or that I can't be there for you, Sasuke kun."

Suddenly the "kun" on the end of his name made her feel far away. Before, he had always liked it being there; it kept her at arms length but now he wanted her near. Not like he wanted to hug her, actually the thought of holding someone who wasn't used to be thrown around or punched at any given time scared him. He might break her. Even when he was little he was he didn't want to hug anyone but his brother; because Itachi was strong and he'd seen him strong. His mother; he didn't want to hurt her because he was "oh so powerful" since he had entered the academy so he had always just folded inside her arms when she wanted a cuddle. In his mind if Sakura were to touch him he wouldn't be able to be anything for her. He would fold.

No, it wasn't that kind of wanting to be near her. She was just... safe; an amazing contrast to the overwhelming, painful feelings he had for Naruto. Soft, warm... affection? She was his friend.

It was sort of embarrassing.

They watched the rain.

"You know, this is probably the first time Naruto has seen rain... He was sleeping when it rained the other night." Again, thunder rumbled, just like it had that night in the hospital. Sasuke drew himself into his high collar.

"I wonder how he feels right now... Naruto never had a problem with thunder or lightning before, I wonder if that's changed?" Sasuke stayed quiet and there was another long silence.

"Maybe you should check on him," the girl started gaining a tiny, almost inaudible hiss from her male companion. Like he was going to do that.

"Speaking of seeing him; if you do you might get something nice Sasuke kun." She raised her chin to look up at him again and he looked down, searching her face for the meaning in her playful words and manner.

"Something interesting?" he echoed back. The rain pattered gently as the thunder snarled noisily overhead. She merely nodded once, closing her eyes into a smile. Sasuke huffed and started off into the rain.

Something interesting.

.

At first the subtle growl of the thunder hadn't bothered him too much. To counter it, the blonde had simply gotten back into bed and snuggled down with the duvet hooked over his ears. It hadn't bothered him to much; that subtle snarl. But now, the thunder how developed into a monstrous tearing apart of the warm safe air. Every time it struck he couldn't move and he had to cover his mouth to stifle a scream. It was pathetic, being scared of something that couldn't hurt him but it was how it made him feel. Empty and alone.

_BANG!_

Naruto's legs gave out as the sky roared in the same moment that he began to pull the door handle down. It would be just as bad outside so going out wouldn't make a difference. He could go to Iruka's place and he was sure the teacher wouldn't mind if he broke down a little bit. He had thought that. But it wasn't the same. As soon as the door opened he wasn't just shaken anymore. He was on his knees and then down with his elbows on the ground and his arms clamped over his head.

_CRASH!_

This time the thunder was behind him, the sound echoing relentlessly inside the walls of his small apartment. Naruto's foot slipped the first time on the now slippery with blown in rain entrance tiles and he fell and smacked his chin on the concrete outside the door but it didn't stop him. Scrambling to his feet, his fingers skimming the wet ground as he tried to gain balance, he bolted straight out into the rain. Irrationally terrified.

_BANG!_

_CRASH!_

He was tired. He was wet. He was muddy. He was cold. He was still scared but the thunder had long since eased of to a distant rumble and the rain picked up in its place, falling around him, hazy and grey. His mouth and chest was dry from running making it hard to breathe. He was lost too. His exhausted, shivering body couldn't find a direction. Where was he? He wanted to go home for the first time. For the first time he wouldn't have minded being in that dingy little house. Anywhere but here...

What he wouldn't give to be close to someone. What he wouldn't give to be warm and safe.

He laughed to himself, the soft noise swallowed by the pound of the rain.

Scared of blood, scared of thunder, scared of being alone; could he be anymore obviously uncool? All things that couldn't hurt him, things that couldn't even touch him. He was so pathetic that he couldn't even think straight and had tried to run away like a coward, only to find himself in the heart of the storm, running this way and that, tripping, screaming and slowly coming to a stop as the thunder retreated. The boy stood with his head bowed, water streaming down his face beneath his soaking fringe. He was probably crying.

I should give up. Nothing is right. I'm out here in the rain when I should have stayed at home. I am a ninja but I can't wear my forehead protector anymore. I want Sasuke but Sasuke is brave and strong and I'm not. He doesn't have many friends so he only wants strong people by his side. I'm not strong. I am weak and pathetic. A burden. I should give up.

"Naruto?"

A small sound of husky surprise brushed through the blonde's lips. His head was too heavy to lift.

"Naruto? Where are you? Naruto!"

He was imagining it right? That voice...

"Naruto? Hey! Naruto? Where are you?"

The rain became a dull roar against his eardrums.

"Naru- NARUTO!" Naruto finally lifted his head and there he was...

Soaked in rain. Muddy to his knees. Dark hair stringy and clinging to his pallid skin, curling over his cheeks that were pink from running. Black piercing eyes staring right at him.

"Sasuke san..." This time Naruto knew he was crying.

.

"I've been out here for hours Dobe. You're such an idiot," murmured Sasuke though the rain. Naruto felt his voice vibrate through his back and into his own body, a similar tremble within his chest as when the thunder had cracked but this time it was warm and soft; despite the insult, a reassuring purr. He didn't feel so small.

"Mmmm... I know," he replied as Sasuke bumped him higher up onto his hips; carrying him home because he couldn't walk anymore. It must be around mid afternoon by now. Since Sasuke said he'd been out here for hours; and yet he was too tired to walk on his own.

When he'd seen Sasuke he'd fallen to his knees. The other boy had approached without a sound, emerging from the rain and come close to him, looking down with his face spookily calm; completely transformed from the slightly flushed, panicked searching face from ten steps away. But when he had held his hand out, Naruto couldn't help but grab his arm with both hands, desperate for the contact, pulling the raven to his knees.

"_Sorry." _He had mouthed, his words wet and quiet. Sasuke had shaken his head incredulously, hooked his arms under Naruto's arms and pulled him into a rough hug with Sasuke on his knees and Naruto sitting, his body strained up and around Sasuke's neck, his face in his shoulder. He didn't ask how or why Sasuke was there, he didn't care; he'd come for him. Naruto grit his teeth against the taste of tears in his throat, taking in the other boy's jasmine scent; the one he loved so much.

"_Thank you, thank you so much..."_

The rain has stopped.

"Where are we going Sasuke san?"

"My house."

"I can go home. I'm alright."

"No, you're coming with me. Who knows when the weather will decide to start up again? Its still warm but it gets colder when it rains and makes thunder almost always because Konoha is always hot. We can't be sure, and I am _not _coming back out here just for you again Usuratonkachi," explained Sasuke somewhat icily. Naruto squirmed at "Usuratonkachi". Sasuke didn't use it as often as he used "Dobe" or "Idiot". It felt more like an insult than a name.

"Stay still."

"Sorry."

"Don't apologize."

"Ok."

Sasuke sighed.

"You're shivering."

"Yeah..."

"Have you been out in the rain this whole time?"

"Mmmm... You too ne?"

"Yeah..."

Silence. And more silence. Nothing but the dripping of raindrops of the roofs of the houses and shops as they passed. All the way to the big Uchiha housing area. Naruto closed his eyes.

When they got to Sasuke's house, Sasuke didn't let Naruto down; he carried past the lowered entrance without removing shoes or towelling off and paid no attention to Naruto's broken attempt at a protest. The blonde's teeth chattered too much to form a full sentence to stop him anyway. They made their way down the hallway to the bathroom and Sasuke turned pushed the lever down on his shower with his elbow and stepped in, setting Naruto on his feet and then on his knees when, with a small cry from Naruto they discovered the smaller boy's legs shaking legs wouldn't support him. The hot water scalded his skin and Naruto writhed, trying to wiggle away into a dryer corner but Sasuke held him fast by his wrists until he was used to it. "Hypothermia Baka, just coz the airs warm doesn't mean the rain or your skin is. Get warm."

Naruto let Sasuke strip him to his boxers and then watched the boy get to his feet and begin to leave. He didn't want him to go.

"Ah- Sasuke san!" Sasuke turned and watched him without reply. Naruto opened and closed his trembling mouth stupidly before looking away. Water clouded his eyes and hung off his eyelashes.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah."

"I have lots of water so stay in there a while. I'll be just outside..."

"Ah... S-sasuke s-san?" Naruto's eyes were wide and his body was leaned forward towards the standing figure. His teeth still chattered and his voice was hoarse from screaming.

_Don't go._

_Stay with me._

_I'm scared. _

_Don't leave me alone. _

_Sasuke san..._

_Sasuke san..._

_I need you with me... _

"You've b-been outside a l-long t-t-t-ime too n-ne?"

On a second scan of the young Uchiha as he turned to listen to the boy sitting on the shower floor, he was visibly shivering and his big shirt and shorts looked heavy, his shoulders were slumped and he was as filthy as Naruto had been before. His jaw was clenched tightly against the effects of the cold shudders making tiny spasms through out his body when he stood still and let it have him.

"W-we can both f-fit, you should w-warm up t-too, Sasuke s-san."

Naruto averted his eyes while Sasuke stripped to his underwear too and shuffled to the side to make room for the other boy. They sat side by side with the water running over one shoulder each. Naruto shivered. Sasuke shivered. This wasn't really working. At this rate both of them would get hypothermia. Naruto examined the goosebumps rising on Sasuke's white leg that was pressed flush with his own. His thighs were cold from Sasuke's rain-cold, slowly warming boxers against his exposed flesh where his boxers had ridden up.

"We need to move..." muttered Sasuke. Naruto nodded silently beside him. Suddenly he felt Sasuke's arm snaking around his waist and his fingers sliding behind his knees and his other hand doing the same with the other leg. In one swift moment, Sasuke had lifted him, his knees pressed against his chest; forced into a foetal position, and spread his long white legs, placing Naruto heavily between them, proceeding to wrap his arms around the blonde's middle making Naruto blush so hard that he was sure he would be fine getting out of the shower right that minute.

"I heard body heat is good for when you're cold too. Its easier this way anyway," said Sasuke matter of factly and Naruto had to stop himself from letting out a breathy something when he felt Sasuke's voice against the nape of his neck and felt it travel to his ears like a chill.

This was not a normal shower!

Naruto squeezed his eyes closed. God, Sasuke's body against his back, his thighs curled around his hips, knees tented to each side of Naruto, turned slightly in... Sort of swallowing the smaller body... Wasn't Sasuke embarrassed too? He couldn't tell if the solid chest against his shoulder blades was hardened muscle or tension. It was embarrassing right? This was not normal? Or... was this one of those things that Sasuke did without thinking and it only flustered the small sunny haired boy in his arms.

In his arms... It was almost like an embrace. He was holding him quite closely... For warmth? Or...

"Hngg..."

"What?"

"Nothing! It's nothing..."

Moments passed. Naruto was so comfortable that he might have gone to sleep in the steam and thick air, if he weren't so nervous. Water spilled over both of their small bodies, huddled together in that shower.

"Ne, Sasuke san. Do other friends take showers together?" Naruto was sure he felt extra warmth spread across the skin in contact with Sasuke. Blushing?

"W-when they could get sick I guess some might..." He stuttered! Didn't he? Or did Naruto just imagine it? Did he imagine the blushing heat of Sasuke's body too? Was he trying to give Sasuke feelings he didn't have in his mind... Was this for real?

Illusion?

But Sakura had said that Sasuke wouldn't push him away... He certainly wasn't pushing him away now but maybe that was because Sasuke saw it as something normal. Of course ninja and ninja relationships would always be different to an ordinary bond. In the past he and Sasuke would have fought together and trained together and probably showered off together; all normal people unordinary-ninja people ordinary actions.

"But not normally...?"

"Don't ask that question when you're the one who wanted me to come in here with you."

"Ah... I guess..."

"Do you think the thunder is coming back?"

"Hard to tell. I said that already."

Naruto mumbled his reply, feeling stupid.

"_Its better to live your life out loud." _

Naruto leant his head back on Sasuke's shoulder, closing his eyes and felt the boy jump at the contact. Water gathered on his blonde eyelashes and then slipped down his face like tears. Was it really better to live your life out loud? Wouldn't it be easier to keep things that might hurt you a secret? But this secret was eating him. He didn't have ninja life anymore. He, Uzumaki Naruto was very usual so normal things ate at him. He didn't have to worry about life or death or blood or injuries or skill. But he did worry about Sasuke. About these feelings for Sasuke.

"Naruto?"

"Ne, Sasuke san... What do you do if you like someone?"

After a long moment, "I guess you should tell them?" Sasuke answered his question with a question.

"And if you think they won't push you away?" This time Naruto's voice shook.

"Y-you... do something about those feelings then I suppose..."

"I see..."

"_Something about those feelings..."_

Naruto blushed again, an imagine of being held by Sasuke as he had been in the rain flashing through his mind. No, a hug was no good because he was always the one being held. Sasuke was bigger and Naruto was sure he would gawky and awkward if he was the one trying to hold Sasuke... and somehow Sasuke wouldn't like that... maybe.

In truth... he wanted to ... with Sasuke... he actually would like to...

_Kiss._

But at this angle, in this position, even if he worked up that much courage, he'd have to turn around and Sasuke would know his intention. He might reject him. Or he might not.

"_I don't think he would push you away."_

Naruto took a deep breath. Here goes everything, Haruno san. You better be right.

"Sasuke san. Can I kiss you?"

No one. Moved.

"Ok."

"R-really?"

"Y-yeah..."

Naruto turned so that he was sat between Sasuke's legs and then shuffled forward and up onto his knees . The boy opposite him was flushed and all skittery; his dark eyes jumping away from Naruto's. If Naruto also hadn't been so flustered, it would have been a bit cute, in a "you're bigger than me and stronger but you're blushing because of something that little old me said" kind of way.

"You're sure about this?" asked Naruto.

Where should he be? Should he move so that he was closer to Sasuke? His heartbeat was going crazy. He could feel it in his fingertips as he reached to place his hands on Sasuke's shoulders. Or his face? His hair? This could be a problem.

"D-do whatever you want," replied Sasuke sourly and Naruto tried not to be hurt by the acidity of his words, pinning it on Sasuke being nervous...

Or was he uncomfortable?

Naruto's eyes widened and he searched Sasuke's blushing face. Was this only for Naruto's sake? He had asked "can I kiss you" and Sasuke had said "ok", but was that just because Naruto was small and pathetic today? Was he giving in...

"On second thought... You kiss me Sasuke san." The dark haired boy's head snapped back to the front, his eyes sharp, the blush dropping from his face.

"What?" This time Naruto was wriggly and blushing.

"Its just... I feel like you don't really want to so you should kiss me if you want to.. with me..."

"I think the near Hypothermia went to your head Dobe."

"It didn't." Naruto smiled a little. I want this… I like you.

"I can't." Oh wow... That cut deep and Naruto could feel tears welling in his eyes already.

Stupid, he growled to himself. Of course that was the case. Of course.

Stupid me.

Stupid Haruno san.

"I can't," repeated Sasuke. "I'm scared..." He tentatively put his hands on Naruto's waist but it seemed to feel wrong to the sitting boy so he removed them. Naruto slumped back to the ground.

"...of what...?" Sasuke audibly gulped.

"That I'll do something you definitely aren't used to..."

"Its ok… please…" Sasuke closed his eyes at Naruto's quiet begging. Ah… Why am I being so pushy, wondered Naruto. Because I want to be close to him.

"You… that's not really…"

"Please?"

Sasuke growled and Naruto opened his mouth to ask again but there wasn't time. All of a sudden Sasuke had him against the wall. He looked angry. And hurt. He was scary. And Naruto was scared. More scared than he had been in the rain because this time the person he wanted to save him, was the one to be feared.

"Stop it," snarled Sasuke. "I can't kiss_ you_ without hurting. I won't hurt you and I won't hurt me. Don't ask again. _Naruto_"

Tears ran over Naruto's whiskered cheeks but either Sasuke didn't see them or he didn't care. The way he said his name was like he was accusing him of being someone else.

Sasuke got up and left without drying off, probably trekking water all through the house. Naruto sat in the shower, the terror draining away, cold and grey.

"I'm Uzumaki Naruto too... I'm him too…"


	29. Chapter 29

_Uwah~ This story was sooo supposed to finish like 5 chapters ago u.u But! Here we are! This chapter. Mmmm. Goodluck luck.  
_

_As always thanks to everyone who reviews and special thanks to everyone who reviews regularly. I love that. You're winners ;P _

_Ja!_

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Idiot! Why did it have to happen this way? Why did all that have to happen?

Sasuke stood in his kitchen with his fist and forearm against the wall, his eyes pressed against the extended limb; his body soaking wet, dripping and raging hot with either anger or something he absolutely refused to identify. He hissed a breath through clenched teeth.

"_..That I'll do something you definitely used to..."_

Now it sounded like he went around forcing himself on Naruto every chance he got. It sounded like he had been physical with Naruto before; like he was holding himself back from shoving his tongue down the other boy's throat.

Disgusting.

No doubt he wanted to kiss Naruto, that's why the blonde's begging had got him but he didn't want Naruto to know about any of the before stuff. He didn't want him to know that they had got pretty hot and for a first kiss, pretty rough on Sasuke's bed that last time. He didn't want him to know that.

Hypocrite...

Yes, it was all hypocritical when he thought about It because Sasuke had been thinking all this time in the back of his mind that what he wanted was _his Naruto _back, for him to know everything again but if that wasn't possible he didn't want this same thing. He didn't want this ninja-like relationship with someone who wasn't the same. Someone who was still small and in Sasuke's mind... sort of... cute..., someone who was still and idiot, but a different idiot. This person, this Naruto was different so it could never be the same again. It was an insult to the memory and taste of the Uzumaki Naruto who had pushed his way arrogantly into Sasuke's life and made him feel... And to be honest, somewhere in Sasuke's mind, he still hadn't let go of the idea of having his Naruto back. He wanted to preserve what had happened between them that day for him when he got back...

But.

If Naruto liked him now it had to be different. But Sasuke wasn't sure if he could do "different" so he had said, "_...that I'll do something you definitely aren't used to..." _And had surely come off as some kind of pervert. He didn't want Naruto to think something of him that wasn't true. He saw that look in Naruto's eyes. He was scared... Sasuke wasn't like that with him in this kind of situation. After all, it had been Naruto who kissed first last time... Although Sasuke took the lead pretty quickly...

But at the beginning of things Sasuke had shown something from his past that he hadn't for a long time.

Shyness. Because originally, Uchiha Sasuke was shy and still was shy when it came to people. And now Naruto was scared of him because he thought he was some kind of dominant molester pervert... Dominant... he probably was... when he thought about it... but the other two... He didn't want Naruto to see him like that... Ever.

Did he take back what he had said; "Can I kiss you" which probably translated to "I like you."?

Or.

Was Naruto... curious? Of course the boy had never kissed someone or been kissed and Sasuke was his best friend... Had he just wanted to know what a "kiss" really was?

Sasuke remembered it well. When he had learned what a kiss was. He'd come home from playing outside one day, a sunny day in February if he recalled correctly, and seen his mother on her tip-toes with her mouth pressed gently to the mouth of his father. A small kiss. His father had smiled once they'd parted and touched the length of his mother's blue-black hair once. It was the first time Sasuke had seen the two so affectionate and the first time he had seen his father so happy.

So he decided to try it.

He and Itachi had been sitting outside on the veranda watching the moon together as they did. Their parents were inside somewhere. It was a warm evening three days after Sasuke had seen his mother kiss his father. Itachi had just come out of the bath and was wearing nothing but his three quarter pajama pants and a towel over his shoulders. His brother had smelt good so Sasuke sat close to him and leant his cheek against his cool arm.

Sasuke was curious and Itachi wasn't paying attention, humming softly into the evening air. Slowly, he turned his head and pressed his lips to Itachi's skin and then very quietly turned back like nothing had happened. His lips tingled with the smell of Clean Itachi. When his discreetly touched them with his thumb they felt smoother than before. The humming stopped.

"Sasuke."

"Y-yes?" No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't stop the jump in his voice as he answered his brother faithfully.

"Did you just kiss me, Little Brother?" Sasuke flushed bright red and clenched his eyes shut.

"I just... I wanted to..."

"It's alright, Sasuke," said Itachi quietly making Sasuke turn to look at him.

"Niisan?" The older Uchiha moved to face his brother.

"It's alright..." He said again with a familiar kind smile as he reached out his hand and Sasuke knew he was going to flick his forehead so he closed his eyes, waiting for the sharp shoot of pain...

_It's not alright if you're going to flick me!_

But instead he felt calloused finger tips part his fringe that had fallen to a curtain across his vision after his bath and his brother's earthy scent as he leaned down and kissed him softly on the forehead, letting his closed lips linger for a moment before pulling away.

"...But you should save a kiss for someone you love," he finished. Sasuke laid his own fingertips around the space where Itachi had kissed him, holding his hair open and looking up, his mouth a small "o".

"But I do love you Niisan!" the child blurted out and blushed again. Itachi had just laughed and ruffled his hair back into place muttering, "one day you'll understand..."

Was Naruto curious too? Was it the same as it had been with Sasuke and _that man_...?

Sasuke didn't know. But there was no helping it now, no matter how much it made his insides churn.

Damnit. Maybe he really was a pervert for thinking that Naruto possibly wanted to kiss him for real... Maybe he was imagining the confession behind that request.

Damnit

There was the noise of a creaking floor board at the door way and Sasuke pulled his eyes of his arm and looked up. Naruto was standing in the doorway, still in his wet, slightly crumpled boxers that looked like they had been wrung out and then wrapped in the towel Sasuke had left him. Sasuke sighed, realizing he too was still in only his boxers. He wasn't cold or he hadn't been concentrating on being cold but Naruto's nose, cheeks and where his collarbone pushed against his skin, were shiny and pink in the air that was chilly against their still warm skin. Sasuke sighed again and made eye contact with Naruto. Thankfully the blonde kept watching him back and didn't seem unnerved by him.

"Sasuke san... Sorry."

"Forget it." He didn't want to hear an apology for something that wasn't Naruto's fault, but something needed to be said and he couldn't say "sorry". But he didn't want an apology.

"Sorry," repeated Naruto and Sasuke grimaced and snapped, "Forget it doesn't mean go for it, Dobe."

"Sorry."

Sigh...

"Let's get some clothes on, ne?"

"Yeah, alright."

They worked in silence as they pulled clothes on, facing away from each other. Sasuke was thinking of what he could do to make the blonde happy again. Not that he had really been happy from the start. He hadn't laughed or cracked that silly grin while he had been with Sasuke. They were both having a pretty bad day. But most days were bad for Sasuke, or they just weren't amazing. Decent would be a fitting word.

"Ne, Naruto."

"Hmm?" Naruto's voice was too high and the interest sounded fake. What did Sasuke want to say? He hadn't really thought, just spoken. Maybe he just wanted to say Naruto's name.

"Do you want... I mean... I can't kiss you, I'm sorry but... I can... I could..." Sasuke squirmed and by this point he knew that Naruto was turned and watching his back. Ah, his back. With all those scars... That couldn't be nice. Sasuke turned too and found Naruto's blue eyes liquid in the dim light. They'd forgotten to turn the lights on when they came in. Didn't matter...

"...hold you." Finished Sasuke in a murmur. The corner of Naruto's mouth twitched and he took one step forward.

This would prove it. If Naruto liked him he'd say yes. If he was simply curious about the feel of a kiss he would reject Sasuke. But this would prove it and then Sasuke would know something. What he would gain he wasn't sure. He didn't know what this would help him figure out, if anything, a new relationship with Naruto was probably a bad thing for someone who was still longing for the ghost of the present person but... It wasn't like he didn't love this Naruto too. He was still Naruto. Just less troublesome.

"Ok..."

Ok.

It was a completely silent process and really, when you had said you were going to do it, it was more awkward than just going for it. Naruto and Sasuke walked forward to each other and stood for a moment. The only times he had held Naruto while he was like this were when he was falling. It was completely different to be here and deciding how to go about this.

Slowly, Naruto made the first move and Sasuke wrinkled his nose at how he went for Sasuke's neck. Somehow it may have been better if he had held Sasuke around the waist, it made Sasuke feel like Naruto was smaller and that he was doing the holding that way but he'd decided on reaching up for Sasuke. Sasuke brought his arms around the other boy. They were now pressed naked chest to naked chest and Sasuke could feel another heartbeat pounding away against his own. Their combined body heat was comfortably warm. Naruto was soft. It was nice. The young Uchiha lowered his eyelids so that he was looking over Naruto's shoulder through his eyelashes and dipped his chin so that his mouth was nestled in the blonde's shoulder.

"Say something," muttered Naruto nervously.

"What do you want me to say?" asked Sasuke, his voice muffled by Naruto's skin. He felt the blonde shivered as lips moved against his bare skin.

"A-anything..." Naruto was warm and Sasuke was tired from running and feeling. Anything...?

"Have you gotten taller?" Naruto tensed and then relaxed, letting out a small laugh.

"Maybe a little. I wouldn't really know," He replied after a moment.

"I see... Are you hungry?"

"Not at the moment."

"I'll make something later. Are you tired?"

"Mmm... Why are you being so nice to me, Sasuke san?"

Sasuke rubbed his thumb along the line of Naruto's shoulder blade.

"Because I was mean earlier."

"Heh. Yeah, you're a big bully..."

"That's right... Want to sleep?"

"I don't want you to leave."

"I won't leave."

"In bed?"

"I won't leave. Want to sleep?"

"It's still the afternoon."

"And."

"Nothing." Sasuke felt Naruto smile into his neck.

The two boys headed to the single bed and climbed in, pulling Sasuke's duvet over up around their ears and lay face to face. It had started to rain again, a gently drumming on the roof above them. Sasuke could feel Naruto's eyes searching his face while he had his eyes closed, pretending to be falling asleep. But he was thinking.

Once again, just like the time before, their feelings had surfaced quickly. He'd gone from being torn up about what had happened in the shower to sleeping next to the person he was scared he'd pushed away. He hadn't wanted to get close to Naruto today but he had. He ended up being overly "nice" to the blonde and let his warmth persuade the dark haired boy to crawl into bed with him. Again. When Naruto got close to him like that he was way past pride. Apparently they were still a strange pair. Something just a little bit out of step. Just as they always had been.

In the back of his mind a small part of him nagged that this was wrong, that this Naruto was much too soft and quiet and giving to be with as he had been with the Naruto before him, that he should wait for that person who was slowly becoming a ghost to return. But was_ Naruto_ really coming back? Could he accept that and say "goodbye"? He didn't know. It was painful to think about. Letting go and accepting or holding on and rejecting. It was too much too think about.

Maa, now's not the time to think. Now is the time to sleep.

Sasuke fell to sleep, his mind still troubled behind the haze of Naruto's warmth and the lingering feeling of his sunny skinned body against Sasuke's.

Sleep...

.

Sasuke awoke to find Naruto curled in behind him, his legs wrapped around Sasuke's thighs and his arms around Sasuke's waist, his body slung around Sasuke's, like he was hugging a too-big teddy bear. He was still sleeping deeply, with his mouth open judging by the way his wet breath dragged loud and long. Sasuke blinked himself awake slowly. It was times like these that he realized how small he and Naruto were. The fact that they could both fit quite comfortably into a single bed made him feel young. As a ninja, his sense of age was pretty messed up. Ninja were almost ageless; fitting only into young or old which you only got if you were young and brilliant or old and useless. No certain numbers. Sasuke blinked again. He was thirteen years old, born on the 23rd of July. And yet at only thirteen he had seen his fair share of anything and everything, as most ninja had. How screwed up was that...

Naruto's stomach rumbled against his lower back, bringing him out of his thoughts.

"ta...b..etai...nyuu..." muttered Naruto in his sleep before Sasuke felt him start to wake. The Uchiha carefully extracted himself from Naruto's arms and turned to face the smaller boy as he opened his eyes.

"Morning Sasuke san..." he slurred, his mouth sliding to an easy grin. Sasuke glanced at the weak blue light on the floor that had crept under the curtains. Moonlight.

"It's still night time Dobe," he answered. Naruto rubbed his eyes and Sasuke heard his stomach rumble again and smiled a little.

"Hungry?"

"Yeah."

"Let's go then."

.

In a way that seemed to be becoming a ritual, Sasuke and Naruto got out of Sasuke's bed and Sasuke cooked for them both. Although this time it was about 4 in the morning and still dark outside. The rain had stopped but the air was a bit cold. At least there was little chance of any more thunder. It looked like it would be a nice day once the sun was up.

"Let's go for a walk later," suggested Naruto as Sasuke brought the plates to the table. The older boy set his meal down and then reached to ruffle Naruto's hair but stopped halfway. Was that too affectionate? Everyone ruffled Naruto's hair but Sasuke couldn't recall a time that he had. Summer sky eyes were watching him as he fisted his fingers into his palm and began to draw his hand away. Naruto's hand came up and caught his, bringing it too the warm morning skin at his cheek. The blonde closed his eyes while Sasuke widened his and watched nervously as Naruto blew out a breath.

"I like you, Sasuke san," said Naruto very quietly. "Do you like me?" He opened his eyes. Sasuke bit his lip.

Let go and accept him or hold on and reject him. There was no in between option because there was no room for both Naruto's inside him. This answer would change everything. If he said yes, he would have to let the Naruto who he had all those memories with, go... But if he said no, he would hurt this Naruto who might be here forever and may never forgive him for being so cruel as to push him aside for someone who wasn't real anymore. If he said no, it would betray his own feelings. Because he did. He did like this Naruto. But he _loved_ _Naruto_. _Naruto _who wasn't coming back...

Drawing a deep breath he replied, "Yes. I like you...Isn't it obvious Dobe?" Just as easy as that, he said it.

His body was heavy as the dark haired boy pulled his hand away form Naruto's face and slipped into his seat, resisting the urge to drop his head into his hands. He never thought he'd have to make a decision like this. His whole life had revolved around killing Itachi but now all that was screwed up and he had bonds he absolutely could not abandoned. But he'd made the decision and he felt better. Better than he had in a long time. It was like a heavy something that had been twisted up inside him had come loose and turned into a warm, slightly shocking feeling that he needed just a moment to process.

"I don't know how to feel Sasuke san," said Naruto. Sasuke looked up from his plate.

"You said you liked me and I'm happy but you look sort of... stressed." Sasuke blinked at him and then stabbed a wiener with one of his chopsticks.

"Of course I'm stressed, I just confessed didn't I. You may not know Dobe, but generally Japanese people are pretty modest so saying "I like you" is kind of nerve wracking, even for someone like me," said Sasuke.

A beautiful coolness flooded over Sasuke as his arrogant tone that he hadn't used in a while coated his words. What a calmness to be stable. To know where he stood. Raising his chin and dark eyes to Naruto he smiled, a mix of confidence and quiet affection. No doubt, it felt good to understand something.

After breakfast Naruto went home to get some of his own clothes and take and clean up from last night. Sasuke was surprised he had the motivation to clean... They agreed to meet again later at the edge of the Uchiha compound to go for the walk Naruto wanted to do once the village had dried out a bit after the on-off rain over the past couple of days. Sasuke thought it was a stupid idea but Naruto wanted to go round the village again. So Sasuke said yes. Way past pride. Way past wanting to fight. Things felt right again. It was a daytime version of the calm peacefulness he had felt that night before falling asleep when Naruto had said "I love you".

At the door, Naruto turned and looked up from where he stood in the entry way, a step below Sasuke who was still up on the floorboards and asked, "Sasuke san. Are we giving up on my memories?" Sasuke stopped and then smiled sadly, reaching out and pushing Naruto's fringe to one side, running the pad of his thumb over his soft eyebrow. Naruto closed one eye against it and Sasuke quirked a dark delicate eyebrow himself.

Cute... He was allowed to think that right? They liked each other after all...

"Are we?" Asked Naruto again.

"Ah.. I think it's for the best ne."

Acceptance.

"Ok."

Naruto walked out into the blue dusty light of the sleeping morning and Sasuke went back to bed and had quiet, white dreams.

.

"Uwahh!~ The village is so pretty after the rain!" cried Naruto as he and Sasuke walked into the training grounds. The trees and grass were a brilliant shade of green even after the raindrops had been stolen by the sun. Everything looked fresh and the smell of nature was almost over bearing. Sasuke didn't like it a whole lot. By this time it was about 9am. The two boys had met up at 7am and had been walking around Konoha for close to 2 hours. The day seemed long because they had been up so early.

"Isn't this cool Sasuke san?" Said Uchiha "hn"ed in reply and leant against a moist tree trunk.

"Sasuke san! The grass makes this "kyu" sound when I walk in it! Look! It's packing down where I walk because it's still wet! I'm making footprints!" exclaimed Naruto excitedly as he paced around the clearing watching the grass compact in his wake over his shoulder. His smile was huge.

"Shinobi don't leave foot prints," Sasuke called, shaking his head a little at the childish antics. Naruto's mental age hadn't changed at all when it came to this kind of thing. All the way here through the village he had been pointing at the colourful things being sold in the early morning markets that he must have held himself back from verbally noticing the first two times Sasuke had taken him through Konoha. They didn't know each other that well at that point after all.

"I'm not a shinobi Sasuke san," Naruto called back. He came to a stop and looked at Sasuke from halfway across the grassy area. He was wearing his orange pants and a black t shirt. No jacket.

Look at you, thought Sasuke. In this green space you just stand there with no shame, like you were there from the start. Naruto's body fitted anywhere in Konoha because this was the village he had loved and wanted to watch over. Sasuke smiled. I've got to stop thinking like that.

"Naruto."

"Yah?" Sasuke felt a tug in his chest at how Naruto answered him casually with "yah" rather than "yes". Finally.

"Wanna do something fun?" Naruto blinked his big blue eyes and walked over to Sasuke, still smiling about the footprints and the noise the grass made beneath his feet. Sasuke felt cliché when the thought "cute" crossed his mind again. Sappy. Ugh... But he couldn't help it.

"Like go outside the village, I was going to take you that time right?" The dark haired boy watched the smaller male's excitement drop from his face as an expression of uncertainty replaced it.

"But... didn't Kakashi san say that wasn't allowed?" asked Naruto.

"What, you were in such a good mood just now, you don't want to?" Sasuke smirked and Naruto blushed.

"That's not it. I'm still in a good mood. I just... Ok. I guess I do want to go." Sasuke moved to leave and Naruto ran to catch up.

The gate was open and Naruto and Sasuke stood in its shadow for a while before they approached.

"Going for a walk, Uchiha?" called one of the ninja on gate duty. Sasuke nodded and raised a hand in reply.

"And him," inquired the other guard, pointing to Naruto.

"He's coming too. That ok?" Sasuke kept his voice normal. Naruto said nothing but flashed a grin in the two men's direction. Did they know the order? Surely activity as frightening as that to do with Uzumaki Naruto's seal would be kept on the down low. Kakashi had obviously been watching them recently so there had been no need to inform too many people but Sasuke hadn't seen any sign of him and he couldn't feel him nearby...

"Yeah, its just we don't see the two of you walking together so quietly a whole lot Uchiha, ya know," replied one.

"You two are always noisy whenever you're going out for missions," added the other with a chuckle. Sasuke merely nodded once again and he and Naruto passed through the gate, walking calmly until they were out of earshot.

Naruto let out a loud breath.

"Mannn... I thought for sure that we were going to get caught," he said with one hand over his heart before he straightened up and looked around. His eyes drank in the dusty forest path stretching in one direction as far as the eye could see and the spread of thick forest to both his left and right.

"Wow... It feels so strange to be outside the village," he murmured to himself. Sasuke watched him fondly. He knew the feeling. To be free of the village. To be clean.

"How far do you want to go?" asked Sasuke. Naruto walked to his side and looked down the path.

"How far can we go?"

"As far as you want." Sasuke wasn't sure why he was being so giving. It was only Naruto. But then again, maybe it was because it was Naruto. Kakashi had said it once; _"you actually don't mind spoiling him do you?"_

No, no he didn't; because Naruto was still that idiot who didn't recognize it as spoiling. He would blink his big eyes at it a few times and maybe ask "why are you being nice?" but would be satisfied with a shrug of the shoulders. He didn't know that Sasuke was watching over him. He was still that idiot.

They walked a long way down the track until it came to a fork at which they took the left. They walked in silence and Sasuke was happy at the thought that they didn't need to hold hands or kiss at any chance they had like he had seen some of the other village's twosomes do; they were better than such immaturity and well... They were a bit different, being both guys and all... But perhaps Naruto had retained some of that ninja-ageless-ness. In any case, the company was enough. Sasuke was light like he hadn't been since before the massacre.

They came to a side track that Sasuke knew lead to a small clearing. On short missions Team 7 sometimes camped there on the way home. Sasuke took the lead and Naruto followed him. When they got there Naruto crouched down to gaze at the patterns the dappled light through the trees over head were making on the grass.

"Ne, Naruto." Sasuke was sitting on the ground watching the blonde explore the light.

"Yeah?"

"Why do you like me?" Sasuke lifted his face to the sky and closed his eyes.

"I don't know. Especially when you're such a jerk to me," Naruto answered quietly and Sasuke pouted silently.

"I came out into the rain to look for you yesterday," he reminded the smaller boy, remembering his terror-struck face from the day before.

"And then you threw me against a wall."

"And then I told you something nice this morning."

"Only after I told you first..."

Ah- He had him there. Sasuke snorted a soft laugh.

"Then why...?" Naruto was silent for so long afterward that Sasuke thought he wasn't going to answer and when he did it gave him a bit of a fright as his voice broke the peacefulness.

"All I know is that it feels good next to you and that my heart starts pounding whenever I look at your face."

Sasuke was about to reply when the clearing turned cold and the air in his lungs came to a shuddering stop inside his chest.

Danger! Danger! Where?

Sasuke leapt at Naruto and dragged his clumsy body behind him.

"Wha! Sasuke san!"

"Shh!" His dark eyes scampered over the tree trunks, the branches.

It was cold and he knew this feeling. It was the same as when they had first met Zabuza. The blood chilling silence was choking. Sasuke activated the sharingan and frantically scanned the area again until-

"It's been a while...Sasuke..."

Time stood still. Not one person breathed until a name passed through Sasuke's trembling lips.

"Itachi..."


	30. Chapter 30 a

_Yare, yare... Took sooooo long~~~~~ Sorry if it's bad ^_^;  
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_*sleeps* _

_Snuggles to everyone who reviews *loooove*  
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Stop.

Stop.

Please.

Just stop.

Not now.

Please, not with Naruto here.

Stop.

Sasuke stood trying hard not to let his anger, his shock, the unbearable tightness in his chest explode onto his face. He tried to be a ninja but his teeth were clenched and his body tense like he was ready to spring but he couldn't move at all. He was still as he drank in the man's form standing across the clearing.

He was tall, his slim body and then limbs hidden within the folds of a black cloak that swallowed him all the way from his ankles up to his eyes. His eyes. That was the worst part. Black and cold, a beautiful curving shape framed by long dark bangs so similar to the younger of the two's. The lines under his stare stood out against his waxy pale skin. He looked sick and dangerous.

Uchiha Itachi.

He'd snuck up so quickly and Sasuke cursed himself for being so relaxed as to not notice his approach.

Shit! This wasn't how they were supposed to meet again! He wasn't ready! Sasuke drew one ragged breath and held it. It was quiet and Naruto was holding the back of his shirt with the side of his face pressed into Sasuke's shoulder blades. Sasuke could feel his jaw clenched against his back. His body shook.

Terrified...

Fear and anger shook Sasuke's frame.

Shit! Shit! Shit!

Itachi spoke.

"Things progressed quicker than expected and now I'm ready but who would have thought that I wouldn't even have to come inside the village..."

Sasuke felt his stomach jump at his brother's voice. He had understood nothing of what the man had said but just his flat tone turned the blood in his face ice cold. He was sweating. Itachi was dangerous, that much had always been clear, and he was strong. Sasuke knew this and he had already decided to take him on long ago knowing this but not like this. Not like this. Naruto.

"Uzumaki Naruto," said Itachi. Sasuke snarled quietly. How _dare _he address Naruto so deathly quiet when Sasuke was here, when Sasuke stood before him, when Sasuke was the one he should look at it. And how _dare_ he address Naruto when the boy was too scared to do anything more than cling to Sasuke.

"You will come with me." Itachi took one step forward and Sasuke took one step back, pushing Naruto back too.

"He's not going anywhere," replied Sasuke shocking himself that he could speak at all. Itachi blinked and lifted his eyebrows the tiniest bit but he didn't seem to be responding to Sasuke's words. It was like he was staring through the raven boy to the blonde. Unnerving.

"If I remember correctly Sasuke, isn't Uzumaki Naruto the annoying child who you constantly complained about? Why is he so silent?" The questions came easily making Sasuke deepen his shaky frown as Itachi asked the slowly and composed. Sasuke didn't give him an answer.

Damnit!

Naruto seemed to be the one he wanted. But if he found out that Naruto couldn't fight he would take him from Sasuke without thinking at all. But right now he thought both Sasuke and Naruto were Konoha ninja. Itachi was smart, incredibly smart, so he had probably considered the possibility that Sasuke and Naruto had some tricks up their sleeves... How long would that illusion last? Not long if Naruto stayed the way he was and there were no escape routes; none that would work against someone like Itachi. Sasuke knew. They were trapped.

"Sasuke move aside, he's coming with me. If you let him go quietly I won't kill you Little Brother," called Itachi as he moved silently through the grass towards them.

There was no point in moving back as the older Uchiha approached. He was faster, stronger and smarter and they were merely a pair of Genin. No, one Genin and a civilian. Sasuke's seated heart pounded against his ribs.

What do I do!

What do I do!

They had left the village without anyone important knowing. There was no hope of rescue. Inside Sasuke was screaming. Naruto whimpered behind him, scared out of his wits just by Itachi's aura that felt exactly like death.

Sasuke's mouth was dry. What could he do? Something that felt like tears stung his eyes. He blinked at it went away.

Itachi was nearing, closing in. Sasuke's breath hissed between his teeth. He didn't dare open his mouth in fear that he would scream or sob.

SHIT!

SHIT!

"Move. Sasuke." Ordered Itachi.

There was no other option. Sasuke reached shakily for his holster. Itachi stopped and gazed at him calmly.

"You think that will work? When I watched you learn them right before my very eyes." Shaking pale fingers closed around the rings of the kunai knives.

"Worth a TRY!" yelled Sasuke and let a handful of kunai fly. As soon as they left his hands he grabbed Naruto and made a break for it, heading straight for the direction of the village through the trees.

Useless. And he knew it.

In an instant Itachi was in front of him and Sasuke didn't even have time to gasp as some offensive part of the Itachi's body slammed against his chest and sent him flying, Naruto's body ripped from his arms.

"NO!'

The tree that came in contact with his back dazed him, pain shooting up from his tail bone to his neck, his shoulder made a _crack! _but Sasuke was right back on his feet, scrambling forward, not trying to keep the desperate terror or the way his heart had hurled into his mouth and pounded explosively in his temples off his face anymore. His air dragged brutally across his tongue, the ground wouldn't pass under his feet quickly enough. Itachi had Naruto on his knees and was standing over him, an expression of docile surprise and realization, blurred by Sasuke's movement settled on his face.

"GET AWAY FROM HIM!" Itachi turned to him as the boy came in fast. On Sasuke's last stride, in one swift movement the bigger male had his fingers clasped around Sasuke's arm had slammed him against another tree, frontwards this time. Naruto screamed, his voice painfully pitchy with horror.

"SASUKE SAN!"

Itachi grated Sasuke's wrists against the harsh bark, one hand holding his hands together above his head, stretching his arms up until his shoulders burned and the other fanned against Sasuke's lower back to hold him in place. A knee ground into the back of Sasuke's thigh. Time slowed to an agonizing crawl. Sasuke's heart struggled to come out of fast forward and continues to ram against his rib cage making it painful to breath.

"He's not wearing a forehead protector, he's screaming and crying for you, he's completely unable to keep himself together. He's not himself is he Sasuke?" muttered Itachi into Sasuke's neck. Sasuke growled.

"He's memoryless. I know that jutsu... Was it Kakashi?"

"You can't have him," gasped Sasuke. Itachi leaned into him and crushed him against the tree. Naruto was crying somewhere in the background. Screaming Sasuke's name.

"Is that so? What are you going to do about it Little Brother? You're just as foolish as you were back then. You can't protect him and do you want to know why?" The larger of the two Uchiha flipped the younger and closed his big hand around Sasuke's throat, lifting him off his feet to meet the level of his eyes revealing a strange light that had leapt to them. The look on Itachi's face was subtle but Sasuke knew this face once. This expression was livid and anger riddled, lacking nothing but an audible snarl that came later as Itachi leant in and whispered to him furiously quiet...

"You're still too weak... Because you don't have enough hate. Don't you remember what I did? What I told you? I killed them all Sasuke, in cold blood. Every last one of them... Have you forgotten that? You live because of me and for me. You live to hate. Has that slipped your mind? You started to let it go didn't you..?"

Sasuke closed his eyes and dropped his head. Shame engulfed him. As much as he_ hated _this man, as much as he wanted to kill him, to watch him bleed... he was right...

Have I lost who I am? I live only to avenge my clan...

Itachi tightened his grip and lifted him higher.

"You're worthless and weak. Still too weak." Sasuke bit back a whimper.

What have I been doing all this time...? Still... nothing has changed...

What am I here for if not to kill this man... but after all these years... I'm still...

Weak.

Itachi drew him away from the tree and held him still by his throat.

It was all useless. Time had never been on his side... He never had enough time with his mother, he never had enough time to grow, never had enough time to become strong...

His hands were shaking cold.

He was as good as dead. There's nothing left here to burn.

Naruto sobbed, drawing Itachi's attention.

"That's right," he said and Sasuke felt his fingers loosen. "You're not the one who interests me, Sasuke." With that he dropped Sasuke's limp body and turned away. Just like that. Because the younger was worthless to the older.

Sasuke lay on the ground. All the panic had seeped out of him and all of a sudden he had no idea what he should do. All he knew was that he was weak and it was a punch in the stomach strong enough to sap his drive, his fear. They were going to die. Or Itachi was going to take Naruto and Sasuke would lie here and drown in his lost identity.

Hope was a terrible thing to lose so abruptly. All he could do was watch...

Itachi approached Naruto who sat trembling in a patch of weak sunlight. His hair was water gold. He would be gone soon. Sasuke considered turning his face away. He didn't want to see himself fail as Itachi took Naruto away. He couldn't do anything about it, why try? Naruto wasn't screaming anymore. He was watching his predator come for him. Sasuke's shoulders ached dully.

What do I live for...?

Itachi's hand emerged from his cloak and reached out to offer itself to Naruto who shrank away from it. A command to come and a threat that if he didn't...

Would Naruto take or leave it. For a moment he did nothing. And then, Itachi seized Naruto by his upper arm and heaved him to his feet. Naruto's body didn't have the courage to struggle so he dangled awkwardly with his head down, his knees sagged and limb. Itachi's shoulders sighed.

In the next moment something happened.

Naruto looked at him. And in that moment Sasuke found something in the perfectly terrified, excruciatingly blue colour of his eyes.

Something that shook him.

Something to feel for.

Something to protect.

Something to live for.

His reason to live was Naruto.

Itachi shook Naruto once and Sasuke's stomach roared to life and burned high, engulfing him. It wasn't hope, not even love. Just an overwhelming need to _separate. _He lifted himself on to his knees, his eyes never leaving Naruto's who even as he was shook, even as tear after tear rolled over his cheeks, continued to beg Sasuke to do _something, anything. _He said nothing but Sasuke knew and now he was burning hot. Itachi was touching Naruto and that wasn't right. Itachi was once again coming after the thing he loved the most. Itachi was stripping him to nothing without even trying.

This time. Sasuke wouldn't sit back and watch. He got to his feet and surged.

"ITACHI!"

There was still enough energy to run. Still enough energy to _try. _As he came in Itachi turned to him just as he had before but this time Sasuke was ready for him. Again, Itachi struck out and Sasuke's sharingan activated in time for him to dodge.

Yes!

Yes!

One second untouched.

Two seconds untouched.

Yes!

Yes!

No. It fell apart, this chance that Sasuke thought he might have with that first dodge.

Itachi, with what seemed like no effort got Sasuke in the face, his shoulder, his chest. Pain shot through him as there was a sickening crack and something gave way inside him. A knee came up and caught Sasuke in the stomach, doubling him over in a gasp that brought up blood. While Sasuke was catching his break Itachi grabbed his wrists and wrenched them behind him, forcing his younger brother to his knees with a knee of his own to his back. Sasuke dropped and found himself face to face with Naruto's blue eyes. Shaking irises, so very blue.

"S-s-s-s-s-s..." The blonde boy couldn't get anything out. He was crying uncontrollably.

"Sasuke," called Itachi. Sasuke dropped his eyes away from Naruto who was still opening and closing his mouth as he tried to speak. At this proximity, they served as nothing but a reminder that Sasuke too was on his knees at the mercy of Uchiha Itachi.

"Sasuke, you're in the way and if you continue to keep this up I will have to hurt you," said Itachi shortly, twisting Sasuke's arm for good effect. "One more chance. Don't come again." The words were a warning that Sasuke didn't understand until Itachi, again, threw him ruthlessly, dragging him across his tall cloaked body by the arm and releasing him into the air, giving his body a spin to it so that he couldn't control his flailing limbs as he tore through the air and skidding across the ground and coming to a sudden stop when two close trees slammed against his spine and skull.

The adrenaline rush had been beaten from his bloodied body. His tongue was thick and his arms were heavy. One might be broken, a few of his ribs definitely were. His back was in pretty bad shape too. He ached. It hurt to be. But he couldn't give up. Itachi was waiting for him, watching to see what he would do. The fast paced time of battle had momentarily disappeared and Sasuke tried not to let fear climb its way back up his throat as the man stood before him, unscathed when Sasuke was bloody, dirty, broken and bruised. His insides swooned as he got to his feet; unsteady.

Come on. Sasuke. You can do this. Do this or he'll take Naruto. Defend him. Defend him. Don't let anyone be taken from you ever again. Come on. Come on...

Sasuke rushed in again but he was slow and sluggish. Itachi caught him again and pushed him to the ground, stepping on his head just hard enough to keep Sasuke scared enough not to move.

"Watch Sasuke. After this you won't come again will you?" Sasuke watched in horror as Itachi went down on one knee in front of Naruto, still keeping Sasuke under his shoe and took the boy's chin between his thumb and finger. There was a definite shift in the air. Naruto's eyes went grey and began to move side to side so quickly it looked unnatural. Itachi pulled back and "hn"ed in approval. Naruto's eyes came to a slow stop and started in a fresh batch of tears. Sasuke struggled.

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM YOU BASTARD! WHAT DID YOU DO! ANSWER ME ITACHI!" His voice was hoarse in seconds.

"I unlocked that stupid door Kakashi had set up in his mind but it seems he couldn't handle it. Who knows what's wrong with him now. I would say he's lost Sasuke. You don't need him now," replied Itachi and Sasuke grit his teeth and tried desperately to get up but Itachi leant to him and he stopped. Ninja still with itachi's breath on his neck.

"Do you love him more than you hate me?" The line shocked Sasuke giving Itachi enough time to toss him aside once more.

"It is not you I want Sasuke. If you have any sense Little Brother, you will stay right where you lie."

Sasuke shook with rage, enough rage to overcome whatever pain he was in. The sight of Naruto's empty eyes. Emptied of any recognition or sane thought, full of everything that he was, poured into him in one go. Too much, just like Kakashi had predicted.

"Y-you..." The raven haired boy's head snapped up and once more Sasuke got to his feet. Hot and angry. Heartbroken. Itachi merely blinked at him. The bitter taste of loss coated Sasuke's mouth

"Have it your way." Sasuke surged knowing it was useless. Knowing Naruto was already gone... He was so angry but so weak against Itachi, not only as a ninja but as a person but the only thing he could do was charge. The only thing he could think of was inflicting some sort of pain on the man that had the ability to strip away everything he was.

Stomach.

Head.

Side.

His eyes filmed with blood.

Chest.

Stomach again.

Blood on his chin.

Pain, so much pain.

Inky black before his eyes.

Another tree.

Approaching footsteps.

Itachi's hand on his leg and then...

A small chuckle and a horrendous crack as he put pressure on the bone in Sasuke's leg and snapped it. Sasuke felt the warm seep of blood over his skin and saw the bone jut straight out through his flesh before he felt the pain, before his shoulders raised in horror and his eyes widened as his red-black blood stained the grass around him, before he screamed out as the intense pain overwhelmed him. He fell to his side.

"Stay there Sasuke."

Naruto was gone.

Itachi was gone.

There was nothing but Sasuke, the hot wave of the most pain he had felt in his entire life... The black hand that covered his eyes and took him to sleep.

.

Sasuke woke up dream heavy and painless. It took him a moment to register the now cold blood all around him and realize he was bleeding out. His vision was blue and blurry but he could make out Naruto and Itachi across the clearing. They hadn't left so he couldn't have been out for more than a minute. Man, blood flowed way too fast, he noted groggily as he tried to muster the strength to squint and clear his vision a bit. Itachi looked like he was thinking. Sasuke could hear Naruto crying quietly but he wasn't sure if it was his senses failing him or that Naruto had run out of energy that was making the cries watery and soft. His half opened eyes rose and fell in a slow and heavy blink. In his mind he could hear waves crashing. Was this what it was like to die? Somehow he had expected it to hurt more but the blue fog in his head has pushed away all pain apart from the tightness in his chest as a burst of grief rose into his dry mouth.

He had wasted so much of his life being cold and now he was alone when he died his shameful and unnoticed death.

So many things he should have done but he was too focused on something else.

He should have done so much more right from the very start.

He should have hugged his mother more. She deserved the beautiful, affectionate baby boy that she never really got.

He should have spent less time being top of the class and made some more friends. Kiba, Shikamaru. Naruto and the others... Skipped school with them and everything.

He should have been realized his feelings for Naruto earlier and started being happy a little bit earlier and stayed happy a little bit longer.

He should have told the idiot how he felt from Memoryless Day One and made something of the situation. Manipulated that stupid Dobe. Taken advantage of him with all his might.

He should have taken an interest in Sakura when he started to think of her as a friend, asked her what she was reading yesterday, asked her how her day was, how Lee was, they were sort of dating or something right?

He should have kissed Naruto the night before like there was no tomorrow because now there really wasn't...

Why was Itachi thinking? He hadn't hurt Naruto yet, maybe he needed Naruto alive...

Waves crashed and Sasuke was sure he could hear his mother singing, feel her warm hands on his feet and then at his forehead...

He was shattered. And this was it. How pitiful, just like in the Land of Wave he couldn't protect his teammate, his friend. The only difference was that this time Naruto wouldn't hold him as he died.

Sasuke squinted to take one last look at Naruto. He wanted to laugh. Or cry. Make a sound.

He was dimly aware of the cold enveloping his body, dimly aware of a painless throbbing in his leg, dimly aware of the slow and weak beat of his heart, and as he looked at Naruto... dimly aware of a flickering in the distance that was switching unstably between slate grey, brilliant blue and demonic red...

A certain something came loose within the body that lay cold in the grass, in a pool of it's own blood.

Waves crashed.

Sasuke began to fall away and every sense was useless. He didn't hear the monstrous roar a moment later, he didn't see the blue, grey, red settle into a deep set crimson, he didn't taste or smell the rotting meat stench, he didn't feel the air familiarly thick. Every sense was fooled by the sheet that was being pulled over him, white and clean, different from the black hand of sleep.

_I should have done more..._


	31. Chapter 30 b

This is sort of like part (b) to chapter 30 because it is just one scene and it's so short but I felt the need to seperate it ^_^;

It's meant to confuse you btw lol. I tried to make a smidge less confusing but making Naruto and Kakashi, important characters, in bold and italics.

Good luck guys ;P

* * *

There was no time for anything. Just screaming among them. The operation room was chaos.

.

"**SASUKE! SASUKE! STOP PRETENDING TO BE FUCKING DEAD AND OPEN YOUR DAMN EYES TEME! WHERE THE HELL IS THAT BAACHAN?" **

"Uzumaki san! Out of the way! Move it! Is Tsunade sama on her way?"

"**WHERE DID SHE GO AT A TIME LIKE THIS!"**

"_If you didn't leave all on your own this never would have happened! No one was prepared! Naruto get out of their way!"_

"SASUKE KUN! SASUKE KUN! Ah.. I can't breathe! I can't breathe! I can-"

"_Sakura!"_

"**Sakura chan! DAMNIT TEME! LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE! WAKE THE FUCK UP!"**

"_She's having a panic attack. Sakura, it's alright, try to take deep breaths."_

"Uzumaki san! We can't do anything with you shaking Uchiha san like that! Any word from Tsunade sama? God, there's so much bleeding... How is he still alive? He might lose this leg if we're not quick. The arms and ribs first, the leg is too messy. Hold on it for Tsunade sama!"

"**SASUKE! YOU CAN'T DIE YOU STUPID BASTARD! DON'T YOU **_**DARE**_** DIE ON ME!" **

"UZUMAKI SAN DON'T TOUCH MY PATIENT! GET OUT OF THE WAY!"

"**NO!"**

"UZUMAKI SAN!"

"Sir, Jiraiya sama is on his way back with Tsunade sama. They should be here before long."

"Excellent. Kakashi san! Would you take your two kids outside please!"

"_Right. Naruto come with me."_

"**You're really messed up if you think I'm leaving him with **_**these **_**idiots!" **

"_NARUTO!"_

"OUT OF MY WAY! WHAT'S GOING ON HERE!"

"**BAACHAN!"**

"Naruto, out of here. Someone take a look at him!"

"**I'm fine! But Baachan! Sasuke! Sasuke! You're gonna fix him right! You're the best right?" **

"I'll do what I can Naruto! Now get out!"

"**NO WAY!**

"Kakashi, out of here! "

"_Yes, Ma'am. Naruto."_

"**I don't wan-"**

"_Now Naruto. He'll be fine."_

"**How can he be fine! He's fucking dying!"**

"Hey kiddo, come on do as Tsunade says."

**"Ero Sennin! HEY! PUT ME DOWN! GAH!"**

"_Through the door Jiraiya sama."_

"Got it."

"**PUT ME DOWN! KAKASHI SENSEI! BAACHAN! YOU DON'T GET IT! I GOTTA STAY HERE! I LOVE HIM!" **

"_Now's not the time Naruto."_

"Hey, you with the scalpel, outta the way. Let me get a look at this leg. Kami... It's a mess. Is it worth even trying for him...? Shit... How much blood has he lost?"

.

The door clicked close. Kakashi sat down on the waiting room chair and draped Sakura across his lap and rubbed her heaving back, trying to calm her as she struggled for air.

"It's ok Sakura," he murmured. She dragged a wet sobbing breath in reply. Naruto stood in front of the closed door. There was no window.

No one spoke. Kakashi was scared to, afraid that if he spoke to Naruto now that he would be betrayed and Naruto would suddenly not have his memories back. But that was all dull compared to the Sasuke who lay covered in blood and barely breathing in the OR.

Naruto had returned.

But Sasuke was at deaths door.

Naruto had returned unscathed. How? Kakashi didn't know. He hadn't seen the part before, only been recalled from his mission and met them at the hospital. Naruto had come back safe. But Sasuke had not. Sasuke was just a body on the gurney right now.

"He better live," spat Naruto but his voice broke as he stifled a sob. "He better fucking live," he muttered. "I'm not done with him."


	32. Chapter 31

_*cries* I'm really sad because I can't reply to reviewers who don't have accounts and I get some really lovely ones from you accountless peoples. I'm now at the point where I've decided that I should address everyone and tell you how much I appreciate the reviews but I'm too scared to talk about you guys individually in case I miss someone!_

_But seriously, thank you so much to everyone who leaves a review~ I loove them so much ^_^_

_P.S: I've been told "leant" isn't a word. I'm very upset about it and intend to stay loyal to it instead of using "leaned" when I can. If I don't I will feel that my whole life has been a lie. This is similar to my loyality to "suprise" over "surprise". Deal._

_

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_

Naruto stood near the door. He hadn't moved since he had been thrown out of the operation room and his mind was still reeling. An hour had passed but they couldn't hear any of what was happening behind the door.

Sasuke.

An hour and half or so ago he had woken up as his life spilled back into his body, overwhelming him as he made the transition from that person to this person. He had watched from some other part of his mind as Sasuke was thrown about like a ragdoll by that man... It made him angry in that small part of him, it hurt him, but at the same time it couldn't overcome the incredible pain of finding himself so quickly.

He had been behind a wall. He didn't remember that but he knew that there had been something that stopped him from being the true Uzumaki Naruto. He remembered the morning after staying at Sasuke's after the festival. He remembered his house and going into the bathroom. Everything until the moment when Sasuke's brother, _Itachi,_ had pried him wide open was watery and faint. He had been ripped open but it was too much to handle and he entered a greyness that numbed him. But it didn't stop his tears. In his grey he had been somewhat aware of small things but still far from rational thought. He just knew that that persistent pound beneath him that was Sasuke's heavy footsteps kept him earthbound and calmed his broken mind to some extent. And then it stopped. Sasuke stopped moving. And he _needed _to scream. And he _needed _to fight. Fight the grey with lucid blue. Overpower the blue with red. Beautiful, blood-red.

It wasn't like before. It wasn't like that time on the mission when he had been trapped inside himself. Not like when before long he was in another world. Where he could feel his brain starting to unravel, detaching from any normal thought process. Unreachable, even to himself. But some things were the same. This time he could still feel the skin around his mouth pucker and tighten. His eyes narrowed and made the world darker. His lips starting to pull back like a snarling wolf's... no, a fox's, a demon's...

When it started, the burn was familiar, the itch from that time before he had slept. Hot. Hot. Hot. But not painful because he was blank and the pain was at his soul not his body as he relived moments of his life over and over again. They felt new although he had known them, but not for so long. But hot. Hot. Hot.

It happened all at once. The wave inside broke and had forced him to cry out with such raw unplaced emotion that his throat felt like it had been sandpapered. He wanted to move, to outrun whatever was going on inside him, but a stabbing pain in his belly kept him in place.

The red hot pain in his stomach exploded with such intensity that he doubled over in agony, bending from his sitting position. The loudest scream he had ever made almost burst his throat. It was a torrent of pent up rage spewing out, a lava flow of all those years of pain, insults, ridicule and helplessness and above all an agonizing breaking of his very being as his eyes slid to Sasuke's white body that reeked of death to his heightened smell.

Despite being in this state he could see and he could move at his own will. He could see this man who had taken one step back and dropped him as he tore his sleeve from his fingers. This man who had bloody knuckles. Sasuke's blood. _His _Sasuke.

Naruto could breathe and see. He was in control but _damnit! _He was so angry, and so hurt.

_How dare you come after Sasuke when you came here for me! How dare you break him right in front of me! How dare touch you him!_

Breaking loose, he had charged Uchiha Itachi on all fours, ignoring how disgusting the notion to rip out his throat with his teeth was. As Naruto flew at him Itachi barely had a chance to move, but still the man was a skilled ninja and pulled back at the last minute, avoiding a fatal blow. Naruto's sharp teeth grazed past him but that didn't stop the blonde from striking out with his arm, the lightly orange cloaked limb tearing through Itachi's black and red coat and sending him flying just as the man had to Sasuke while Naruto sat and watched.

He had been incredibly... _clear_. A moment before he had been a wreck, the memories simply too much for his unprepared mind, but as soon as the red-orange flame had started at his skin he felt it burn away the anguish. He was clear.

Itachi vanished into the trees like smoke before Naruto could kill him like he wanted to. His red eyes still burned on the black of Naruto's eyelids when he blinked slowly.

In the waiting room, Kakashi's voice brought Naruto out of his thoughts.

"Naruto?" Right... They had to talk at some time. But he was nervous. What if they didn't want this Naruto?

The blonde shook his head. Now was absolutely not the time, not with Sasuke how he was...

Naruto turned to his sensei. Sakura sat next to him, her eyes were red and her hands shook in her lap.

"Are..." The older male's eye drove into Naruto, searching. "Are you... back?" There it was. The question that would confirm that yes, he was here. Yes, he was that stupid loser again... But now was _absolutely not _the time for that worry!

Don't be selfish for once in your life and just give him the straight answer! Don't make him think about you when Sasuke is in there like that!

Naruto took a deep and smiled the best he could but he could feel his eyebrows crinkling and trembling in a strange way that he knew made the face look weird.

"Ah.. I'm back Kakashi sensei... Sakura chan." Sakura stared at him with her big green eyes when he said her name. Naruto squirmed under her intent look.

"How...?" asked Kakashi quietly. Again Naruto offered a half smile, quirking one side of his mouth and closing his eyes.

"Honestly, I don't know..." The smile came away and he looked down between his feet. "All I know is that when I actually saw Sasuke like that... Nothing else mattered. Not me and my pain. All of me is nothing compared to seeing my best friend dying. I've seen it before. I couldn't handle it that time and I couldn't handle it this time either..." Hot tears pushed behind his eyes as he continued, babbling a bit now. "Heroes are supposed to jump in at the last minute and save the day you know, but I was really late; really, really late... I was... I couldn't..." His shoulders were shaking even though he didn't want them to. "I screwed up again..."

It was painful. It hurt. He didn't want any of this. He couldn't lift his head and look Sakura and Kakashi in the eye because this was all his fault. Naruto pushed his fists against his eyes and clenched his teeth. It was his fault that they might lose Sasuke. It was his fault that even if Sasuke lived, he might not have a usable leg. It was his fault that Sasuke was broken.

"N-N-Naruto." Sakura stuttered through her trembling chin. He couldn't help but lift his face when she called him. He always looked when he called her...

Her skin was sickly white and her whole body shook with just noticeable tremors. She looked thin and fragile.

"I... I missed you." Now he was crying and he didn't have the strength to cover his pathetic crying face. She was on her feet shakily, taking baby steps toward him.

She must have been so alone. In his watery memory, Sasuke was always near him but Sakura... must have been so alone. It was all his fault...

Uzumaki Naruto who always said he would be the one to take Uchiha Sasuke down, really had. It was all his fault.

Naruto fell to his knees. He was scared.

Sasuke.

Sasuke.

Sasuke.

Sasuke.

Sasuke.

"Sasuke..." The name fell from his lips wetly. He raised his blue eyes to Sakura who was standing over him and let her touch the tears on his cheeks with her frightened fingers before she too went down on her knees and wrapped her arms around him, burying her face in his neck.

"Naruto... It's not your fault. I promise you, Sasuke kun will be fine. I promise you that. I absolutely promise you that with all my heart... We'll wait this out together. Sasuke kun will definitely be alright. He can't not be now that you're here..."

Her arms were warm and comforted the turning terror that was eating him from the inside out. He'd never been this scared. Never. But he was home. Finally home. With his family, his number ones, his Kakashi sensei and his Sakura chan and _definitely _he would be together with his Sasuke soon too. They just had to wait the bad stuff out, be strong and hang in there. That's all it took, and that was his specialty. But still he couldn't stop crying.

"Naruto." Kakashi was on the floor next to them. "For what it's worth..." He paused. "_Okaeri."_ Naruto squeezed his eyes closed tighter.

"T-Tadaima!"

Just wait it out.

Be strong.

Hang in there.

Hang in there Uzumaki Naruto and hang in there Uchiha Sasuke.

.

.

.

When Sasuke woke up it was very dark. He could barely see a thing and it took him a long moment to register the piles of breathing warmth on either side of him and the feeling of his hands being much hotter than the rest of his body. The space in front of his nose went foggy every now and then in time with his breathing. Sasuke blinked up at the patterns of squares above him; tiles? Trying to clear the lingering hazy blue from his head.

Where was he? He blinked again. Ah, the hospital. He wasn't dead... How about that? He wondered if he could move at all. Slowly he flexed his toes on one foot and then- oh, that was interesting. It seemed his toes only moved properly on one foot. How curious... Sasuke clenched his eyes shut and then opened them again, his vision was still blurry. Not that he could see anything other that the roof right now.

I wonder if I still have arms. He tensed and untensed the muscles on each arm. They were there and working. Next he wiggled his fingers on his right hand and found they didn't move a whole lot. One of the warm piles stirred. It raised its head blearily and looked at him.

"Sasuke kun... are you awake?" it whispered to him in the darkness and he blinked three times fast. His mind was catching up now.

He was in the hospital after his battle with Itachi, the reason his fingers didn't move was because Sakura was holding his hand in both of hers and his leg didn't respond well because... The sickening snap sound his leg had made when Itachi jumped the bone straight through his skin made the raven clench his teeth.

"Sakura...? Ugh..." replied Sasuke, still blinking his way back to balanced thought. His voice sounded like plastic and he now realized that the fogging that was going on around his nose was a mask to help him breathe. He was so groggy...

"Sasuke kun, how do you feel? Does it hurt? You're on a heap of drugs so it shouldn't." Her questions made his head spin. He wiggled his hand out of her grip and reached heavily for the mask to pull it off, his fingers stumbling over the smooth see-through surface. Sakura stood up and helped him. He coughed loudly as the cold midnight blue air flowed into his lungs and the girl tried to urge him to put the mask back on but he shook his head in refusal. He didn't need help to do something as simple as breathing although right now it was taking a lot of effort.

"Are you alright?" Sakura asked again after Sasuke had settled into a comfortable breathing pace.

"I can't feel my body much yet," he wheezed back, straining his eyes over the rise of his cheeks, probably still swollen from the beating he had taken, to see her. He asked to sit up and she raised the bed a little for him, but only a little. He asked for more but she told him no because apparently he had broken three ribs. He couldn't feel it. Sakura was unusually calm, he noted. How long had she been there? Probably a while considering he was "on a heap of drugs" to keep the pain away so his injuries must have been pretty bad... She must have panicked herself out.

"What happened? How am I alive? How did I get here?" Now his own questions were making his head spin. Sakura watched him quietly for a minute from her bedside chair.

"You and Naruto left the village-"

"I know that much Sakura," he snapped in an angry whisper, trying to sound as though he wasn't muzzy and drugged up. She frowned slightly but she wasn't mad, he could see. That was her concerned face.

"Don't get worked up, you'll hurt yourself even more. Be a bit quieter ne? Talking takes energy Sasuke kun. Be quiet and I'll tell you." Sasuke scowled weakly.

"You left the village. At about 11 am I came looking for you two and I couldn't find you anywhere. I went to Kakashi sensei's place but he wasn't there so I went to see Hokage sama. We were assembling the search party and a lot of the village was out by the gates to see what was going on when..." she trailed off, her eyes skirting to one side.

"What happened, Sakura? How did I get here?"

"Naruto came through the gate with you," she replied slowly. Sasuke's heart missed a beat. _Naruto?_

"But my brother... he.. Naruto was..." Sasuke stared at her. It didn't make sense! Didn't Itachi take Naruto away after he was done with Sasuke?

Suddenly Sasuke remember the other pile of warmth. His eyes flew to his left side, to his left hand that was hot and constricted. His eyes widened in disbelief.

"_Naruto_...how...?" The blonde boy was sleeping at his left side with his head on the bed, his hand holding Sasuke, his face nestled in his arms. Naruto breathed deeply and Sasuke stayed very still.

"Sakura, _what happened?" _He insisted, his voice still a whisper. Sakura drew a breath before she started again. Sasuke leaned forward slightly to listen.

"Sasuke kun. When Naruto came through that gate he had that orange chakra around him again. He was carrying you and I thought you were dead. He thought you were dead. He was screaming and crying. But he was begging for help too. You were covered in blood...But no one wanted to go near him like that. You know... The villagers thought he would tear them apart," she said uneasily. "But you were there inside that chakra too, in his arms and you were dead Sasuke kun, I was sure." Her voice was shaky with emotion and her eyes closed as she spoke. "Finally Lee san jumped up and went to help. Hokage sama and some other jounin went over and took you from Naruto and rushed you to the hospital. Naruto collapsed after that and Iruka sensei brought him here too but he woke up and refused to be checked over. We waited through your eleven hour operation; your condition was pretty critical... Your leg... your shoulder, you ribs and arms... your brain had to be looked at, multiple fractures... And we've been here ever since." She was done and all could say was, "I see..." in a small, tired voice. His arms were heavy. Sakura nodded and they feel to hush. Sasuke was tired. He could feel his body urging his mind to become unconscious again but he didn't want to.

Sasuke remembered something else he wanted to know.

"Sakura."

"Hm?" He was slipping back into sleep. It was stupid but he remembered he wanted to know.

"That book," he murmured breathily, so quiet that she got to her feet and leant over him to hear, bending the bed back to a lying down position as she did, aware he was slipping. "That book you were reading... What... what was it...?" So hard to stay awake. Sakura stroked his head and no one could possibly comprehend how soothing that was when he could feel himself panicking to stay awake long enough for her answer. The drugs were taking effect again. He could hear himself slurring and becoming small under her kind hands. He did love her. She was gentle and soft. She was motherly.

"The book..." he whispered. Above him she smiled in a way that looked like relief but still as though she was about to cry. From here it looked like she had been... That was his fault surely.

"The book, Sasuke kun, is called 'Tides and Ebbs of Honesty', it's a very beautifully written book and one of my favourites. It's a story about two..." Her voice faded away as Sasuke went back to sleep, her calm tone lulling his body to slumber.

.

.

.

Sasuke woke again later feeling slightly less drugged. It was still dark and he could feel the aching in his leg this time and his chest felt tight. The breathing mask had been replaced. Sakura was awake.

"Hey."

"Hn... Can I sit up?" In a word, he felt like: shit.

"Yeah." She lifted the bed for him and he looked around. It was slightly lighter in the room this time. Maybe it was early morning.

To his left Naruto was sleeping and Sakura was watching him. They watched the boy together. Three sets of even breathing.

"Sasuke kun?"

"Yeah."

"I have to tell you something but you've got to promise not to react in a big way because no one else really has since you're like this and if you get emotional, I'm gonna get emotional and I was emotional for like eleven hours straight so don't do anything ok?" Sasuke nodded slowly.

"Naruto has his memories back."

What. What. Naruto has his memories back?

Sasuke blinked and Sakura watched his face closely. He was of course very good at controlling his face so he stayed blank as she had instructed.

Of course. It all made sense. Itachi had unlocked his mind and Naruto had gone. Just gone. Those grey eyes. But here he was by Sasuke's side, living. Breathing. How could that be if Naruto was blank? Because he wasn't blank. And Sakura said Naruto had come back in the Kyuubi state...Did that have something to do with it? With Naruto in the Kyuubi state they must have escaped... Had Naruto killed Itachi...?

"H..How...?" His voice betrayed him when he spoke. Raking her fingers through her short hair Sakura sighed tiredly.

"No one knows. But then again no one knows anything much about what goes on inside Naruto's body. He's just... back." With her last word she smiled and looked back to Naruto who continued to sleep. As expected from him. Or maybe he was tired from waiting for Sasuke to wake up, waiting to see if he would live. Now that he looked at Sakura, her eyes looked tired and dull and she was leaning on her elbows on the bed to keep herself up.

"How bad was it Sakura? Waiting it out...? You weren't in there were you?" Sasuke asked her. She looked uncomfortable. "You can tell me," he assured her using the best friendly voice he could muster. "Please Sakura, be completely honest." She was obviously taken back by the "please" part. But she spoke.

"No, we were there for the first little bit but then Tsunade sama came in and we were kicked out. For the first few hours it was pretty alright. We were worried but it was... quiet. When we started hearing the doctors yelling we were freaking out a bit. But then it went away... Iruka sensei came to be with us too. My parents as well for a while but I told them to go home. I went to sleep after a while on Kakashi sensei's lap and Naruto was sitting with Iruka sensei. I won't lie to you Sasuke. It was nearly unbearable the times when I was actually conscious. I'm sure Naruto was awake the whole time."

Sasuke felt better that Sakura was telling him all this. Maybe it was because she was a female and he was able to trick him self a little into thinking that when she said "unbearable" it wasn't really unbearable. She slept sometimes anyway right?

"At one point you regained consciousness and you... were screaming."

Or not.

"Iruka sensei had to cover Naruto's ears. They must have put you out again pretty quick though. You only got halfway through 'Okaasan'..." Sasuke groaned and closed his eyes.

"Where's Kakashi?" he inquired softly. His eyes were on Naruto again, watching the boy's back rise and fall in even breath. He couldn't believe it. That he was here, alive.

"I think he's sleeping somewhere else. He got recalled from a mission and ran all the way back here. He'd been going non stop since dawn so he must be really tired. He was awake the whole time too. Iruka sensei is with him while we're here," she replied. "He'll probably want to know you're awake. I'll go see him now." She got to her feet and headed for the door. Sasuke's eyes didn't leave the blonde sleeping on his bed. Sakura called his name from the doorway just loud enough for him to hear. He didn't turn to her.

"You should wake Naruto. He's been really worried. He cried. A lot."

She left and Sasuke was left with a sleeping Naruto. A sleeping Naruto was the one that made Sasuke the most anxious. Because he looked the same no matter who he was. If Sasuke moved his fingers that had stayed so incredibly still for all this time and woke the sleeping boy as he had woken Sakura, would he rub his eyes and say "Sasuke san?" or would he really rub his face gracelessly and call him "Teme"?

Was he really back? For real? Sasuke was scared to find out.

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_AN: 'Tides and Ebbs of Honesty' by Marcab. It's lovely, you can google it ^_^_


	33. Chapter 32

_Here it is, the final chapter. I didn't even tell you guys last chapter that it was coming to an end like I wanted to! ;_; I'm feeling a bit emotional really. My baby... What will I do with my free time? I think I only have one decent plot in me. Anyway, I won't do any fartheewells as of yet because I think I'll do a epilogue_. _Look forward to it :]_

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There was no other noise aside from the sound of Sasuke and Naruto breathing. Both long and deep, one rasping slightly from the tightness of his chest.

Now wasn't quite the right time to wake the sleeping blonde... Not yet.

Dark eyes moved slowly over Naruto's form as he gathered himself, mulling things over.

Itachi attacked them. His brother. That man he wanted to kill. He had seen him again... At the time he had tried to stay as a ninja and see the situation as "me, Naruto and enemy". It had been hard at the time to get a grip and now that he was sitting quietly in the safety of a hospital room it was even harder not to think about the fact that it was _his brother_, his once beloved brother who stood before him and took him out like at one point he hadn't held his hand in the village or carried him to bed in his arms and touched his hair and his face with the same hands that lashed out to break him... It was more painful than expected and Sasuke had to consciously suppress more memories from surfacing.

And the things Itachi had said to him had really hit home and held so much truth, not only because he believed them somewhere inside, but because it was Itachi telling him them and Itachi was... Itachi had been his "Niisan" that knew the answer to everything and knew exactly how anything and everything worked. A genius.

Yes, those words had hit him hard, so hard that his world had stopped as he questioned himself.

_Am I loosing myself?_

_How should I feel about that? _

_Is there any other way for me to live? _

_Would I be betraying my family if I thought, it just hurts too much...? _

It was so quiet right now.

It was hard to know about anything. He supposed that the first one to address was "Is there any other way for me to live?". If he could decide that then most of the other questions in his mind might be easier afterward.

_Is there any other way for me to live? _

But all he'd known since _that day _was that he lived to kill... To kill Itachi... It was just as his brother had said...

Can I live? Is it ok to not live under the weight of revenge? He didn't know.

Sasuke's eyes still watched Naruto sleep, having come to rest on the small part of his face that could be seen while the rest was buried in his arms. Sasuke tried not to move the hand that Naruto held.

Uzumaki Naruto. The true Uzumaki Naruto was back. That really was something; so suddenly coming back to everyone. Really... something... But Naruto really was something for sure. He was unusual and surprising at all times. When it came down to it, it was just like Naruto to come back at a time like this, without warning.

Uzumaki Naruto.

Ever since he and Naruto had met he had been sure of one thing. He was annoying and intrusive, always butting into matters that were none of his business, especially Sasuke's. But another thing was absolute. Naruto was a big part of how Sasuke moved. How Sasuke moved he still wasn't sure, was it that he was stuck in the past or was it that he was too set on the future; he wasn't even sure which time he wanted to live in but what he knew, what was absolute was that Naruto was a part of it. A pull in any situation.

If Sasuke was stuck in the past, living in the bloody murder of his clan, alone in that big house at the end of the road, Naruto was trying to move him forward. With his stupid love of their team and his determination to make Sasuke feel apart of it, even if it meant just having someone to argue with everyday, he was pulling him forward.

If Sasuke was running towards the future, to his goal, to he and Itachi's final showdown and passing life by as quickly as he could, then Naruto was grounded in the present, grabbing his hand as he rushed by and dragging him back to say "stop and look Teme, we're here and now." Making him stop and do all the stupid childish things that Naruto loved and making him love them too.

Which was it...?

Sasuke blinked slowly.

Did it matter? Not really. Wherever he was Naruto was there too screwing up his pace or his stillness, he couldn't escape him at all. Why try to resist? Naruto wanted to be in the present and live and it seemed he wanted Sasuke and everyone else who came near him to live there to. Even though he had such big dreams, Naruto was here and now in Konoha. The village. Home.

_Is there any other way for me to live...? _

That decision wasn't even his now. Naruto had made it for him, a very long time ago and he was only just realizing. And even though all this time when Naruto hadn't had memories, the thing that got Sasuke the most was the lack of control in his life when that happened... Right now, he was sort of happy that someone as rough as Naruto was giving him a straight answer and that was "shut up and walk beside me." An answer he couldn't refuse, because if it was up to him, he'd probably stay in the past or keep running. With Itachi.

But that's not what was best for him and Uchiha Sasuke was suddenly coming to terms with that even though he was a good ninja and he knew it, even though he was an name worth knowing, he had never accepted, never known that he was allowed to do something for himself and have something for himself and that he was someone by himself. For a long time all he could feel was the weight of all the blood that was spilt in the massacre. All he knew was revenge.

But that wasn't what was best. That wasn't what was healthy. What he wanted to do for himself, what he wanted to have for himself, was his own life, to be someone on his own. And he'd never had that.

"Okaasan... Otousan..." he murmured into the quiet. "I hope you can forgive me..."

They'd want him to be happy right? To do what he wanted to? When his mother held him in her arms when he was small she had dreamed of him living happily; free and healthy right? His father had wanted him to become strong enough to stand on his own, away from Itachi's shadow or something like that right?

He wanted his own life, but that life was worthless if he continued to sit and _long_ for that person. He wanted his own life, with this person.

His hand reached out.

He'd never wanted anything more in his life.

This blonde mess of hair, this sunny, soft skin, this honey suckle sleep scent, those fierce blue eyes.

Wake up.

Wake up now.

.

It only took one touch and Naruto felt like he had been sleeping only to wait for the feel of that touch on his shoulder. He groaned as he opened his eyes and lifted his head from his arms.

Sasuke was sitting up, one hand on his shoulder, the other still in Naruto's. Naruto was very still as he took in the bandages on the other boy's arms and the ones he could see at his collar that beneath the hospital gown would be crossed over his chest and over his shoulders. His skin was paler than normal. But he wasn't frowning. In fact his face was doing that thing where it had almost no expression, just watching. Like from that time at the inn when Naruto had thought Sasuke looked so beautiful.

What should he say? What would be the right thing to say to Sasuke at this moment?

"H-hi."

"Hi." That didn't give him much to go on.

"Who are you?" asked Sasuke. Not really a question. It was like the tone Iruka had for when he used to test them on ninja rules. A question to find out if you knew, not asking because they didn't know.

"Uzumaki Naruto," replied Naruto slowly. "Number one ninja in all of Konoha, Future Hokage," he tagged quickly on the end, realizing he was looking for more than a name and quirking a half smile.

"And I am?"

"Uchiha Sasuke. That bastard genius kid."

"I see." Naruto panicked as Sasuke slid his hand out of Naruto's grasp. He'd done something, said something wrong! Sasuke hated him for leaving him for so long? Naruto watched with wide eyes, terror catching in his throat so he couldn't even apologize or try to say anything as Sasuke's raised his hand and fisted it.

He's going to hit me. He's going to hit me and tell me to get out. He'll punch me and I can't move.

Because I deserve it.

Naruto closed his eyes. But Sasuke didn't punch him. He dropped his fist onto Naruto's bowed head and Naruto could feel how his grip trembled. The feel of the room shifted.

"Sasuke...?" Sasuke didn't let him raise his head, putting more pressure on him to keep his chin down but Naruto could see the other boy through his bangs and eyelashes. His shoulders were up around his ears and his eyes were hidden away in his hair as he bent his face. His mouth was visible, his teeth clenched and his cheeks were flushed with effort to hold back whatever feeling he was trying to keep inside.

"B-baka..." Naruto blinked slowly. "You're... such a moron... Usuratonkachi..." Sasuke's voice was choked and this time Naruto didn't obediently keep his head bowed. In one swift movement he pushed Sasuke's arm aside and climbed onto the bed, sitting astride Sasuke's body on his knees. Roughly he grabbed Sasuke's face in both hands and jerked him up to look at him, biting back the sting of tears but holding fast as Sasuke tried to turn away. He was angry at Sasuke for not showing him this face, for not being honest with him, the _real _him. He was angry that he was hiding like he had when Naruto hadn't remembered him. He was just angry. He hated seeing Sasuke this way but not seeing it was worse. Sasuke was supposed to be the strong one.

"Teme, don't call me that when you're blubbering like a girl!" Naruto hissed, not saying what he wanted to. He wanted to comfort him. He wanted to heal the tragedy that Sasuke was. Every person he met he could make smile, but Sasuke was still... It hurt them both. Such a similar lonely pain, but still different enough for Naruto not to understand all the way through.

Sasuke squeezed his eyes shut and let out a choked sob which was the moment that Naruto realized he was crying too, more than Sasuke who was still biting them back. His blue eyed vision was blurry and wobbling with yet to fall tears. Sasuke's body was shaking beneath him. He was probably hurting him but he didn't really care. They struggled a while longer, Sasuke trying to pry Naruto's hands off of him but Naruto keeping him still, forcing him to look at him, to see Naruto's determined face, to accept him, to _see _him.

"Usura..." managed the raven, his struggling hands on Naruto's wrists falling limb, his clenched jaw relaxing in the palms of the hands that held him in place. The atmosphere was tense for a moment longer before Sasuke whispered, "Shit... I hate you..."

Naruto laughed wetly in reply and released Sasuke's face, a huge wave of relief flowing through him as he sat back a little to admire the mess Sasuke was. A mess over him. It was sort of funny.

"You're so difficult Teme. Such a crybaby," muttered Naruto, hiccupping and wiping his eyes.

"Look whose talking, your whole face is wet and yuck," shot back Sasuke before he looked back to Naruto, his face and breathing calmer now. Naruto smiled a little. It was almost as if he hadn't been away at all. The blonde supposed it was like that when it was talking with someone you knew well. You'd fall back into pace no matter what. It was probably harder for Sasuke though... He was the one who had to deal with "two Naruto's" after all.

As he knelt over Sasuke's hips Naruto tried to remember what he'd been doing and where he was while he "wasn't here". He kept saying that he hadn't been there or he'd been away or locked up but he must have been there somewhere inside this body. He knew what happened while "away" after all. It was a bit like sleep. You don't remember when you fall asleep and while you are asleep you see dreams and sometimes you know you're asleep but you can't physically feel being asleep, like the bed or the blankets or how you're lying. Life had been like a dream where you don't know why you're ok with some of the things that happen or why you're doing them. The place where he was locked away was like bed, he couldn't feel it.

How weird.

How hard had that been for Sasuke? That Naruto had been pretty different... Much gentler, quieter, softer than his normal character. It was sort of pathetic. He had been the sort of person who needed protecting... And because of that character, Sasuke was like this.

Naruto looked behind him at Sasuke's leg that was being supported by a bulky cast under the blanket. Did the leg still work right? Naruto wondered.

"I can't move my toes properly on that leg," said Sasuke suddenly.

"I see... They had to reset the bone in it so maybe it'll have to take some time to get better..." Naruto answered, smiling reassuringly but Sasuke just watched him and then dropped his eyes to his hands in his lap.

"Maybe."

In his chest, Naruto's heart clenched. Because of him Sasuke was like this. He had nearly died. He had been forced to show a side of him that Sasuke probably never wanted anyone to know; during the operation when he screamed for his mother and just now when he cried in front of Naruto, also in this moment when his future was uncertain and he was probably scared... Naruto knew he would rather die than let someone hear him scream like that. It wasn't embarrassing but ninja and men were supposed to be strong. Not that he knew a mother to scream for to save him but tearing your throat out in a cry like that was just too... Although he had been screaming for Sasuke in the operation room...

"Sasuke. Don't protect me ever again," said Naruto very seriously, lifting his eyes to meet Sasuke's squarely; an action that he didn't feel like he'd done in a while.

"Why?" Sasuke's answer was so simple, like it was such a stupid thing to suggest.

"Why? Because I don't want anyone to get hurt because of me anymore!" Sasuke just sighed.

"I am a shinobi. If there is someone I can protect I'm not going to let them die and only save myself. Especially not a team mate," said Sasuke slowly, closing his eyes to hide his dark eyes. Naruto stared at him.

"I didn't ask for you to protect me. You ended up hurt because of me being helpless _again!" _Naruto grabbed Sasuke's collar and leaned into the other boys face, trying to stress his point. Long dark eyelashes fluttered at the motion and opened. They sat eye to eye, breathing as one.

"You're so damn emotional. I hate that about you."

"Then don't protect someone you hate," growled Naruto.

"I won't let someone I love die ever again," whispered Sasuke, his voice was velvety and sent shivers down Naruto's spine. The Uchiha was composed and calm, looking him right in the eye while Naruto's own gaze flicked from side to side across the depth of the other boy's eyes.

"Sasuke..."

"I always hated you and thought you were a total disgrace in the past. But even the first time when my body moved on its own to protect you from Haku... I was still thinking, "I don't want to see him hurt. I don't want him to die."And this time... I thought the same thing. I don't want you to be hurt. I don't want to see you like that. I absolutely won't let someone I care about die... I always knew that I didn't want anyone to touch you but me... "

Naruto let go of Sasuke's collar.

"Naruto. I'll tell you something, you're more important than you know. More important _to me_ than myself so I don't want you to be hurt. So I will always, always protect you."

The tears were building up again. Stupid teme, making him cry again.

"Naruto."

His chest hurt. When Sasuke called him in such a miserable voice, in a voice so honest, he couldn't help but think about how much he loved him. It was irrational; to love someone who aggravated you so much, but he did. He loved Sasuke and he always would.

Sasuke had such an emotional face on and it hurt just to look at him.

He loved him so much it hurt.

"Sasuke... I'll become stronger so you won't have to protect me. So that you'll never be injured again," murmured Naruto, laying his forehead against Sasuke's and trying to keep how overwhelmed he was out of his words. In reply Sasuke ran his fingers through Naruto's blonde hair, pulling softly to lift Naruto's forehead of his and then very slowly, in a way that felt so right, he kissed him.

It was soft and comforting and said everything they couldn't.

_I'm sorry_

_I missed you_

_Don't go away again_

_Stay beside me from now on_

_I love you._

Sasuke rubbed the line of Naruto's jaw with his thumbs as they parted and then came together again. The feeling of Sasuke kissing him again made his heart ache even as it pounded loudly. This time they were gentle with each other, pressing their mouths together and breathing in the warm space between them, letting Naruto's tears fall on both of their cheeks. The heat of their mouths together moving slowly; still clumsy and new but unhurried. Sasuke's skin was warm where Naruto's fingertips skimmed along the line of bandages that crossed his collarbone and shoulders.

_I'm so sorry._

God, he'd missed Sasuke so much. Feeling like part of him had been here all this time but still feeling like he hadn't been with the other boy had been so painful but right now all he felt was complete, warm and loved.

Naruto moaned and the tone of the kiss changed. The heat of their bodies became very apparent as Naruto pressed himself against the Uchiha. Sasuke licked at his lips and pushed his tongue demandingly into his mouth and this time Naruto didn't panic, inhaling through his nose sharply. Sasuke groaned and flicked his tongue along the roof of Naruto's mouth making the blonde twitch and make a small sound of pleasure in response. Naruto felt the heat between his hips start to pool and he moved involuntarily, rolling his hips once against Sasuke's.

"Ahh.. Ngh..." It was too dangerous to move again, Naruto felt his knees start to shake in effort to stay still.

The kiss had quite quickly switched from something slow and soft to something not really appropriate for a hospital room where anyone could walk in so Naruto was glad when Sasuke slowed them, bringing them to a heavy-breathed stop, unsure he could have done it himself.

Sasuke kissed his panting lips once more before dropping his head into Naruto's shoulder. Naruto brought his arms around Sasuke, wiping his lips with one hand and making small circles on Sasuke's back with the other, trying to calm or distract himself. He could feel the rise of scars against his fingertips in places and pulled open the hospital gown to reveal red-purple scratch marks visible wherever there was a gap in the bandaging. Naruto tensed, successfully taking the focus off of the pounding heat that spread from his navel, halfway down his thighs. Sasuke was still trembling against him.

This was what he had done to Sasuke? This is what happened after he lost himself in the bathroom? He didn't remember that part at all.

"None of that matters," said Sasuke shakily.

"It matters to me. I did it."

"It's fine.

"None of that matters," repeated Sasuke.

How could Sasuke be so forgiving? Naruto didn't know whether to be angry or grateful...

Another pause. A long pause as Naruto waited for Sasuke to stop breathing with his shoulders.

"Ne, Teme." He wanted to tell him he loved him. It was hard though. After having hurt him so much.

"Hn."

"I... you... How I feel is..." Up until now it had only been "like" with the other Naruto, but it wasn't like that. It was love, definitely.

"As it stands," finished Sasuke shocking Naruto with the small smile that his voice held.

"You aren't mad at me? For leaving?"

"It wasn't your fault so no. Not much anyway." Naruto laughed breathily.

"As it stands then?" asked Naruto.

"As it stands."

"Sasuke?"

"Yeah."

"I'm gonna make you happy forever. Don't worry about a thing because I give you my word on that. I'll absolutely make you happy forever."

"Ok Dobe. Ok."

_I love you more than I can say. _

_._

_.._

_..._

_.._

_._

When Sakura, Kakashi and Iruka came back to that hospital room, Sasuke was asleep and Naruto was sitting by his side.

"Are you alright?" asked Sakura as she went and sat at Sasuke's other side. Iruka came around and touched Naruto's shoulder. Kakashi took up stance next to Sakura. Everyone looked so tired.

"I'm fine," said Naruto softly.

There was a long moment where everyone just watched Sasuke. It was a miracle he was alive really.

Crazy. Naruto touched his lips.

"We're all fine," said Iruka from one step behind Naruto.

"What about Sasuke kun's leg?" inquired Sakura.

"Hopefully it will heal in time. Tsunade sama is the best so there is a good chance but it was messy. The rest of him is fine, the ribs and that; they'll just be a little sore for a while." Kakashi put Sasuke's bed back down to level as he spoke. He looked exhausted; his body moved slowly and stiffly, his visible eye was shadowed and dull but still held a fond smile as he looked back to Naruto and nodded at him.

"We're all fine," said Iruka again and squeezed Naruto's shoulder. The boy just watched Sasuke.

_Definitely, we won't be lonely anymore. There's been more than enough pain. _

_Definitely, I'll make us happy forever... _

Everything was fine. From now on everything was fine.

.

.

**FIN.**

* * *

_Mmm.. Sap... _

_I'm terribly sorry for that kiss. Seriously, I think my only talent lies in making up excuses such as "ninja are much more mentally advanced" which make it ok for Sasuke and Naruto to make out in a hospital room at the tender age of 13_._ And filler angst. I do that a lot lol. Anyways, happy ending ;P Thank you soooooooo much for reading!~~  
_


	34. Epilogue

_Minna san~ I give you the epilogue. Hurray for mixed up memories! Forgive me if the chronological order is terrible. I wrote them all and then realized I should put them in some sort of order but got lazy and didn't really double check after reshuffling ;P  
_

_-Note- Sakura's Birthday- 28__th__ March -White day- 14__th__ March _

_I hope you can enjoy the last part of this story~_

_

* * *

_

"Pass me those blue ones Forehead," called one girl.

"Yeah, yeah, here you go," replied the other, flicking her cherry blossom pink hair and handing the first girl four blue flowers for the bouquet she was making.

"Who orders something other than roses on White Day?" complained the blonde girl as she struggled to find a good way to arrange the blue with the red. "Ugh.. This is stupid."

Eighteen year old Sakura sighed a little at Ino's frustrated mutterings but the exasperated expression was soon replaced with a smile as a man walked through the flower shop's door, his entrance announced by the cheerful ding of the bell on the door. The fact that he was holding a package that looked a lot like chocolate made her even happier.

His cheeks were flushed slightly, his thick lashed eyes gazing at her adoringly, making her blush too. He had been trying to be more open about them after the little talk they had had where she made him drop the "san" off her name but seeing those eyes in a normal, everyday place still took a little bit of getting used to. To her, him in his heavy ninja vest, goofy green spandex and fuzzy orange leg warmers looking at her with that sort of warmth was breathtaking.

"Happy White Day Sakura, I love you," he said sweetly, kissing her gently right there in the middle of the floor in plain view and slipping the present into her hands. "I would have got you roses too but I knew you were helping out here this morning so I couldn't," said Lee sheepishly, a deep blush now spreading over his cheeks at his own boldness. Sakura beamed.

"It's more than alright Lee." She was light with happiness. So lucky to have him, she thought. Lee was perfect for her. He was gentle and understanding. He didn't demand that she give up watching over Sasuke and Naruto and knew the importance of a team. He always looked happy to see her and spoilt her rotten. He made her so happy she didn't know what to do with herself when he looked at her or told her he loved her. Any girl would be jealous of what she had. Which reminded her...

"What about you Ino? Expecting any White Day presents from anyone in particular?" teased Sakura, turning to her rival and waving the chocolate proudly with one hand on her hip. The pretty blonde girl stopped arranging flowers, pouted and replied with, "just Shikamaru and Chouji, I made them chocolate on Valentines Day so I'm hoping they'll give me something back. Shikamaru is pretty lazy and Chouji might eat it before it gets to me though..."

"No one else?"

"None of your business Forehead Girl."

"I was just curious."

"Yeah whatever, you're making fun of me"

"Ah, there's Naruto kun and Sasuke san," said Lee suddenly, pointing out the window, moving things along before Sakura and Ino started another fight. The two girls moved to look out at the village that was alive with markets because of the holiday. Pink and red was everywhere. And indeed, there Sakura's two team mates were.

Sasuke all tall and long, now much taller than her and with a head over Naruto walked in smooth, elegant strides. His hair was still unruly and perfect at the same time, his pale face long and beautiful. Today he wore three quarter grey pants and an open necked blue shirt, strangely free of his Uchiha crest. He wasn't wearing his forehead protector. Right now, as he walked slowly on Naruto's left, his face turned so that those observing from the Yamanaka flower shop could see his features, his dark eyes were warm and soft while he listened to Naruto's talking.

Next to him, Naruto, one head down was dressed in his orange pants and black t shirt, his forehead protector hanging lazily around his neck and bouncing slightly as he walked, a certain spring to his steps. He turned his face their way to look at something and Sakura smiled at the huge smile he wore, his brilliantly blue eyes shining and jumping this way and that, his mouth still moving even as he faced away from Sasuke. Even now when he was all grown up, Naruto still found childish delight in the big village holiday markets.

"They look happy," noted Lee with a smile. Sakura nodded her head in agreement and Ino commented playfully, "I wonder if they'll both be buying White Day presents or if Naruto gave him something on Valentines Day." All three ninja laughed.

"So, you're two weeks eighteen, a proper adult. Has it been a happy ending to childhood for you and Team 7?" asked Lee, touching her short hair. Sakura blinked, still watching Sasuke and Naruto.

'A happy ending'? Now that was something to think about...

With these two and with Kakashi as well, there had been lots of times over the years before the settled scene they were seeing right now. Good and bad.

Small things like training together and going on missions together as a team. Sleeping in inns and eating breakfast with Naruto usually still in his pajamas as normal.

And bigger events too.

_Helping Sasuke to walk for the first time without his crutches, Sakura under one arm and Naruto under the other. Sasuke had his determined face on, Sakura had been worried and Naruto was watching in amazement as Sasuke started. Kakashi stood a few meters' away, sat back on his haunches clapping his hands and calling Sasuke like he was a child taking his first steps with a stupid little grin on his masked face. Then just Naruto was holding Sasuke and then he was striking out on his own. Unsteady, growing more steady. When he got there, he stood on his good foot and lifted his recovering leg and kneed Kakashi gently in the chin. "I can do it myself." As expected from Uchiha Sasuke._

_. _

_Watching Sasuke and Naruto become more and more ok with being the tiniest bit "couple-y" in the presence of Kakashi and Sakura and sometimes Iruka over the years. At first they wouldn't touch each other at all but soon they couldn't help it. She had smiled so much when Kakashi congratulated Sasuke on wiping stray rice roughly off Naruto's face for the first time all those years ago. One time Sakura overheard a conversation Iruka had with Kakashi on the topic too when she accompanied her sensei to hand in a report, about how he was amazed when the other day he'd observed Naruto ruffle Sasuke's hair in public view. They were totally hopeless. By this point she and Lee walked down the street holding hands. It was a bit different though she supposed. _

_._

_And of course there was the time when they went on a joint mission with Team 8 and the look on Hinata's face when Sasuke bent and breathed an almost silent "night" across Naruto's forehead before he went to bed, shocking everyone. Sakura put it down to the presence of Inuzuka Kiba who Naruto was quite good friends with, and the fact that Sasuke seemed to be the jealous and possessive type. Hinata had looked shocked but not all that heartbroken. Then a small, sad smile graced her lips like she had just confirmed something. The next week Sakura heard that Kiba confessed and taken her on a date. _

_._

_One memory she had was Sasuke's face at the festival the year after she had first accepted what was going on between her two boys when she told them both, "You can absolutely never love another woman more than you love me. Ok?" Blinking surprised eyes on Sasuke's usually so composed features; like a child's face that made her smile. He'd blushed and muttered commitment. Naruto had just grinned and asked her, "That's what you want for this year Sakura chan?" and she replied, "Forever you idiot."_

_._

But it wasn't always happy when they were together.

_The earliest memory that she had where they had all been hurt together was when the Hokage passed away when they were sixteen and at his funeral it had rained. Sakura, Sasuke and Naruto stood in a line with the rest of their ninja academy year, all in black. Sakura had cried and Sasuke and Naruto had held her hands tightly with their ninja faces showing in the Third's honour. Afterwards Sakura took the two boys home with her and she and Sasuke had slept in her living room on the makeshift bed her mother had made them while Naruto, more distraught than he let on, slept in her bed upstairs. _

_._

But more often than not they were a pretty happy group. Those were the memories she liked to think about the most. Happy memories were best.

_In the next week after the Third's passing, Tsunade became the new Hokage and took Sakura on as an apprentice now that she was staying in the village for good. They had her celebratory party to which Team Kakashi were invited due to Sakura's association with the new village leader. A very drunk Hokage had insisted on each of them have a taste of alcohol and it became very clear, to everyone's surprise, that Sasuke over Naruto was not particularly good at holding his own against the special sake Jiraiya had brought along. He had ended up revealed some very interesting things about Naruto's facials in particular situations, answering what Ino had asked Sakura the day before regarding who was played which role in the two boy's relationship. Quite frankly it was just way more than Sakura, or anyone else present for that matter needed to know. A mortified Naruto promptly flung Sasuke over one shoulder and left without a word. _

_._

_In truth, Sakura had ended up learning more than she needed to know on numerous occasions but some were less comical than others. There were always good and bad times. It was definitely not all flowers and sunshine for them, no matter how cherry blossom pink she was, no matter how sunshine-y blonde Naruto was..._

_One early morning last year Naruto had come to see her while she was doing the graveyard shift at the hospital. He could barely walk and the back of his pants were stained red with blood. This was the day after the night that Sasuke came back from a failed mission on which he lost two men. Naruto was on the verge of tears as he lay down on the bed in a private room. _

"_Did you want to?" she had asked and he had turned his face away muttering, "It's not his fault. He was upset and I think this was the only way he could help himself, Sakura chan...You should have seen his face..." But that wasn't what she was asking. Repeating the question, he shook his head into the pillow and began to cry. But still Naruto went home to Sasuke after she had cleaned him up and loaded him with pain killers, and then even came to training the next day. Sasuke came too and Sakura spent the whole time trying to not say something to the tall raven boy. By the end when they were warming down she was at her breaking point. Sasuke went to touch Naruto and the blonde shrank away. Sakura lost it when he asked "why are you doing that?"_

"_Maybe it's because you fucked him till he bled and couldn't walk!" She screamed at him._

"_What?" Sasuke's face was shocked and she hated the way he looked to Naruto for an answer. _

"_Don't give me that shit Uchiha Sasuke. I know you love him but that was not love! That was rape you big idiot! No wonder he doesn't want your hands on him! I can't believe you would do that no matter how bad things were! He didn't want it Sasuke kun! He didn't _want _it!" Sasuke had been taken back. And then he looked to Naruto again and Naruto looked away. No one else said anything else and Sakura never did find out what happened but she was sure her explosion had made things worse even though Naruto and Sasuke stayed together and were happily fighting the next week._

_._

_Again, funny-slash-slightly awkward was when Kiba threw a party for his seventeenth birthday and this time Sakura saw more than she needed too. It wasn't like they were actually doing the nasty in front of everyone but the way they were moving on the dance floor; pretty much sex with clothes on. Grinding and moaning into the music, a very intoxicated Sasuke with his hands dipped into the back of and equally intoxicated Naruto's pants, Naruto's mouth skimming over Sasuke's singing the words: "Lights on but you're mom's not home I'm sick of laying down alone..." _

_They got a few stares but no one dared stop them because although Sasuke became a talkative drunk and loosened up, Naruto got a bit vicious. Luckily, both of them had drunk so much they didn't notice and didn't remember anything too specific the next day. _

Sakura felt a giggle bubble behind her lips as she recalled Sasuke's horrific hangover the morning after. Naruto had shaken his off fairly quickly thanks to Kyuubi's quick recuperation talents.

_._

_And then there was her own seventeenth birthday. The previous day someone at the hospital who just found out that she was that girl on Team 7 with the two "gay boys" asked her if she got lonely being the odd one out and she'd been thinking about it all the way to her birthday. But then she came home and found that her apartment had been broken into and the two "gay boys" that she was the odd one out from, had made her dinner and filled the entire place with cherry blossoms. Did she feel left out? Not really. _

_._

_A few days later when Naruto had his first mission without Team 7 and he and Sasuke started their little tradition where if one of them went on a solo mission, they had to leave the other one a letter in case they didn't come back; that was something to remember too. Sasuke had come to her in the middle of her birthday dinner date with Lee with this look on his face that she had never seen before and the letter in his pocket, unopened. Lee had been very understanding and as expected of him, even in the middle of a date as important as that one Lee looked concerned, smiled reassuringly and said, "Naruto kun is definitely fine Sasuke san but the more the merrier, please join us!" and let Sasuke sit at the table with them. The Uchiha stayed near Sakura until Naruto came back safe and sound and she had never seen him so pathetic. She had also never seen Sasuke kiss Naruto until he did as soon as the smaller boy came walking through the village gate. Deep and long. _

_._

Sakura smiled and laughed as Sasuke leant over Naruto's shoulder with an uninterested face to see what the blonde was looking at the stall. Usually they were pretty discreet but today Sasuke was showing a little, with two fingers hooked through Naruto's left side belt loop, their arms brushing from time to time. This was the one of the only things that Sasuke would do as affection in public. She remembered sometimes he put one finger through her belt loop to make sure she didn't "wander off" when they were going somewhere specific that required walking past book stores or racks of clothing. Only one finger though. Two fingers was something more.

Yes, so many memories and experiences that had brought them to this time and place now.

_Last week, a trainee had to have a bit of a counseling session with Sakura and the other staff on that floor about why when Uzumaki Naruto or Uchiha Sasuke came in for minor injuries after missions and had to stay over night, they always put them on Sakura's floor so she could treat them, but also at the very end of the corridor and at least three doors down from any other patient. _

_The poor young girl had been doing the graveyard shift and of course even though she was aware that Sasuke was a patient at the time, she didn't know that you weren't supposed to go any further than the second to last room and had walked in on Naruto flat on his back on the floor with his legs hooked over a broken ribbed Sasuke's shoulders; both sweaty and panting. She'd burst in after hearing groaning, thinking something was wrong. _

_Never ever go further that the second to last patient when one of the boys was on the floor because whoever was left alone at home liked to pay a midnight visit to the other. Midnight visits that if you walked in on, you might never be the same... _

_._

Those two...

But it wasn't always Sasuke and Naruto who she made memories with. Kakashi was a part of the team too.

_He was the first one she told about getting a boyfriend. Her first boyfriend. After Lee had formally asked, and by formally she meant bowing as low as he could without getting on his knees and saying, "Haruno Sakura, I would be very pleased if you would become my girlfriend!", she had run into Kakashi on the street as she walked home in somewhat of a happily nervous state. He blinked at her dazed face over his book._

"_Rock Lee asked me to be his girlfriend and I said yes!" she blurted out. _

"_Ok," he replied. And they kept walking in their own directions. _

_._

_The time that he patted her gently on the head on a mission and she had felt so proud. Kakashi had been up ahead, checking the path and despite being in a slight state of panic, as usual, she had kept a good guard over exhausted Sasuke and Naruto and even started at Kakashi, reaching for a kunai as he approached. He told her, "good work." _

_._

From when she was a girl to now, in her womanhood, he had been there making memories with her too.

_One stormy night after finishing a tiring 24hour-plus shift at the hospital, Sakura was walking home, her temper blowing up at anything, even the heavy rain that no one could help. She had cancelled on going to Lee's that night, not wanting to upset him with her foul mood and was now heading home to go straight to sleep._

_At the time, Konoha was the host for the Chuunin Exams and there were a lot of foreign ninja of all ages hanging around the village. She met one on the way home in a shortcut alleyway. As he tried to touch her and tempt her she had become very angry. On the verge of decking the guy with unpredictable strength, probably enough to kill him, she had felt an arm snake around her neck and a smooth voice ring out clearly over the rain. _

"_There you are Sakura-hon, I've been looking everywhere for you." It was Kakashi, in nothing but his black skins, revealing the ANBU tattoo on his shoulder. The creep who had been hitting on Sakura took one look at that swirl and made a polite excuse and disappeared into the night, effectively saving himself from a fight he'd rather not lose. Kakashi always had excellent timing. _

And it wasn't just times with her that she had memories of Kakashi.

_She'd heard from Naruto one day over tea that once when he and Kakashi were walking through the village, back when Naruto was fifteen, they had met and obnoxious genin who started calling Naruto out about being gay; how it was disgusting and that people like Naruto should die. He'd told Naruto that he could never be Hokage because the village would never accept someone like that as their leader. The rest of the boy's team had hung back looking uncertain until the single girl stepped forward and told her team mate to back off. He pushed her and told her to shut it, still spurting insults and curses at red in the face with embarrassment and anger Naruto. _

_Kakashi strung that boy up from a tree by his ankles for "being a rude, shallow minded little brat and bullying a girl." Naruto said he had gone back later to throw stones at the boy and the female team mate who was debating whether to cut her him down or not told Naruto that she thought he was a really good ninja and he would definitely be Hokage. She also told him with a blush, that he and Sasuke were adorable even if they were her sempais. Sakura had bought Kakashi the 'Icha Icha Paradise Movie', a luxury he was saving for himself as a big reward, for showing some anger in the right place. _

_._

From the flower shop window with fond eyes, Sakura watched Sasuke say something and Naruto's face pout before he threw a punch at the raven which he easily dodged. Naruto flushed as Sasuke quickly ran his fingers through the other man's blonde hair a moment later.

He was gentler these days. Sasuke smiled and laughed and joked now. Still sarcastic and blunt as hell but he was softer and never looked lonely when Naruto was near. He was much happier to be here in this life now that he had Naruto and Naruto wasn't nearly as unsettled with his behavior after he and Sasuke got together. They were happy she was sure and she was too.

'A happy ending'?

"Yeah. I guess it is." Said Sakura.

"I'm glad," smiled Lee.

* * *

_The official end of Blood Stained Breaths T^T I'm gonna miss all the time it takes to write stuff like this! __I already have the urge to write something new, not sure what yet though, I'm making a list. __ Thank you to everyone who has been with me through out this whole thing and to everyone who was so encouraging! And anyone who gets through all of this, I tip my hat to you. I know I wouldn't read something this long. _

_*sniffles*  
_

_GROUP HUG! Ramen all round! Yummy!_

_Love you guys~ *spamsloveateveryone*_


	35. OMAKE

_Heeey~ So this is the rape scene and so on from Sakura's flashbacks in Naruto's POV. Written for everyone who has asked me about how this exactly went down. Fair warning, I'm not so good with sex of any kind. ._

_Enjoy the rape omake?_

* * *

As he sat in the dim light, the tick of a clock was loud and unbearably slow. The lights were on in the kitchen but he was sitting at their table in the dark. It was late and he'd heard on his way home that things hadn't gone well. Tsunade had come out of nowhere and pulled him aside, her face serious as he blinked at her with big blue eyes, dango stick between his teeth and shopping in his arms.

"Baa-chan what are you-"

"Naruto." Her crème brulee eyes bore into him. "Sasuke…" For one horrific moment Naruto thought she was going to tell her that the Uchiha had died but she drew a breath and continued more softly.

"He lost two men; they sent word ahead of them. They're on their way back. Just… Be aware that Sasuke is going to blame himself." One hand on his shoulder, shaking him firmly and then she was gone. Naruto had come home and sat down to wait.

The shopping was still on the bench. The milk was probably going sour and no matter how much Naruto told himself that Sasuke would come home too tired to be upset, he was worried about the raven. His boyfriend always blamed himself first (unless it was blatantly Naruto's fault) and if he didn't come home to go straight to sleep…

_'What should I say to him? I've never lost anyone, what do I say?'_

Suddenly there was a creaking noise as the front door opened. Naruto leapt to his feet and then stood frozen at the table for a second as Sasuke sounded his shoes in the entry. The blonde tried to gather his thoughts before making short, quick steps down the hallway.

When he got there the first thing he noticed was Sasuke's sandals lying messy in the tiled entry instead of front and center like they usually were. And then there was Sasuke himself, standing on the lip of where tile rose into wooden floor boards. It was dark and Naruto didn't dare turn the lights on. The man was still, the outline of his shoulders tense.

"Sasu…" Naruto called softly and the other started, almost toppling back into the entry. Naruto grabbed his arm to steady him and felt the muscles there trembling.

"Sasuke?" The name murmured through his lips uncertainly. In the dark, liquid blue eyes flicked back and forth anxiously over the Uchiha's figure.

"Babe? Are you alright?" He knew it was a stupid question and regretted it instantly when Sasuke flinched. Naruto drew back a step, releasing the arm he had still been holding.

Moments of silence slipped past them making Naruto uneasy. He was about to speak when Sasuke moved, lifting a hand to trail fingertips over scarred cheeks. The glint of his black eyes in the dark.

"Na…"

"I'm here, Sasuke. Tell me what happened, ok?" Naruto's own hands came to tug at the sides of Sasuke's vest, pulling the raven into the room.

_'We'll talk about it and then he'll have a shower and then we'll go to bed. He won't eat but he'll need sleep. That's what we'll do.'_

Under the pads of his fingers he felt the familiar sensation of chalky dry blood. Though it was dark Naruto knew Sasuke was covered in it. He could smell it on him.

Sasuke's feet stopped them only a few steps in and all of a sudden the raven seemed to change his mind, his touch shifting from hesitant fingers to his body on Naruto's, arms wrapped tightly around him. He was shivering and his breath seethed through clenched teeth. Naruto's heartbeat picked up but he quickly calmed himself.

"Sasuke, let's talk about it ok?" Naruto patted his back, trying to get him to loosen his grip but they were sinking to their knees, Sasuke's hands slipping up under his shirt, wandering to the waistband of his underwear. Naruto squirmed, realizing Sasuke was trying to escape.

"Oi, Sasuke, we should talk about this. It'll be good for you," he reasoned but Sasuke's hands were all over him and somehow he found himself spread out over the step, half in the entry, the sharp corner of the wood digging into his back.

"Sasuke! I said let's talk about it!" Naruto struggled, trying to push Sasuke away by the shoulders but when the raven lifted his head and suddenly they were face to face, he couldn't move. There was nothing he could do. Sasuke's face…

There was nothing special about it; he wasn't crying, it wasn't even an upset expression. No angry flush under his eyes, no tiny little bumps flanking his nose. No scowl, no snarl, no dip of his brow. But something in his eyes knocked Naruto breathless. The man's face was such a perfect porcelain mask but in his eyes… There was no word for it. Churning anger and sorrow…

And then Sasuke had buried his face in Naruto's shoulder and the blonde had gasped as Sasuke tore his pants and boxers to his ankles, roughly pushing his legs open with hard, calloused hands. He grunted something non-descript and Naruto squeezed his eyes shut and whispered "oh God, Sasuke please! We should talk about this!" But there was no stopping him and Naruto's didn't know what to do after Sasuke had showed him such a face. He tried weakly to close his legs but the other man was between them, bearing down on him, too heavy to move in a blood-weighted vest.

Sasuke wasn't slow or gentle. He didn't play with Naruto like he always loved to. They didn't kiss or murmur sweet nothings. No tongues, no ghosting lips or feather light touches.

Naruto was all for getting rough but this wasn't…

Tears shivered through trembling blonde eyelashes and Naruto cried out loud as he felt Sasuke press against him, hot and throbbing.

"S-S-Sasuke." But the raven didn't answer. Naruto was disgusted by the way he clung to Sasuke's vested shoulders, his legs hooking over the raven's back, toes curling.

"S-Sasuke!" He called him over and over as they stayed still in that position, Sasuke frozen, pressing himself to him and Naruto holding on for dear life, waiting, searching for something warm. But after that mission, there was nothing left for him and Sasuke wasn't listening anymore.

Sasuke heaved himself inside Naruto with a loud grunt and the shock was so much that the blonde lost his grip and fell back heavily onto the floor boards, knocking himself dizzy but the pain quickly brought him back to acute awareness.

"Mmh-! Ahh! N-No! S-Sasuke! Stop! It hurts! It hurts!"

No response.

He inched himself in further until he was fully sheathed inside Naruto's tight passage, leaving the blonde writhing in agony.

Naruto could feel himself sobbing openly but Sasuke didn't seem to notice and Naruto was crying too hard to form any more words. He was in pain but most of all, he was scared. He burbled incomprehensively, his panicked words tripping over each other and lost in loud sobs.

As the other began to move, Naruto's fingers grappled desperately for a hold on the ledge of the step, the movement driving splinters under his skin. His heels slipped on the slick tiles underfoot as he tried to scramble away but Sasuke was holding him bruisingly tight at the hips. He couldn't move. The blonde cracked open tear-blurry eyes and then clenched them back shut, letting out a long, strangled cry at the sight of Sasuke rolling his hips against him as he moved in and out, his face twisted into a nasty scowl, eyes closed.

Something was tearing, Naruto was sure. It hurt so badly and he was certain what was coating the insides of his legs was mixed with blood. Every hair on his body was on end, his skin super-heated to the point that that too was painful. His insides were on fire and he could feel Sasuke reaching him horrifyingly deep. His stomach churned and the back of his throat burned as he retched, turning his face away from Sasuke's panting. The house was silent aside from the tick of the clock that was quickly lost under loud cries. Naruto held onto the ledge until he felt the sharp corner biting through his flesh.

_'It's not his fault. He just wants to escape and I'm the only one he can do that with. It's not his fault. It's not Sasuke's fault. He lost two men. He went on a mission and lost two men today. They died and this isn't his fault. It's not Sasuke's fault. This isn't-Oh god."_

A monstrous, raw scream tore through Naruto as Sasuke came inside of him and finally the Uchiha appeared to have noticed him. Trembling all over, he stilled and Naruto could feel him staring down at him from where he was above. Naruto threw an arm over his face and stifled his sobbing; retching again as Sasuke slowly pulled out and cum oozed from inside him.

_'It's not his fault… It's not his fault…'_

Sasuke stumbled to his feet and left Naruto lying in the entry way without a word. A moment later Naruto heard the sound of the shower turning on and the slap of a blood-heavy vest hitting the floor.

He lay there for what felt like forever; at first staying as still as he could and then later testing his abused body. He ached already and when he moved his hand between his legs it came back dark and shiny in the gloom.

Blood.

His hips throbbed where Sasuke's fingers had held him, the flesh almost certainly bruising. His eyes and throat were scratchy and sore. With a loud groan he sat himself on the cold tiles and reached in slow jerky movements for his pants, easing them up and buttoning them with fumbling fingers.

The shower noises stopped and Naruto froze, halfway to his feet as Sasuke appeared in the doorway. He was naked. Naruto shivered, unable to identify his emotions.

"I-I'm going to s-see Sakura," Naruto said quietly, his voice breaking and jumping in strange places.

"I…" Sasuke started and then closed his mouth.

"It's ok. I'll see you l-later, Ssss…" Naruto went to say his name but couldn't. Something shifted in the air between them and the floorboards creaked as Sasuke leant forward slightly. They locked eyes and Naruto swallowed thickly before laying his hand on the front door. It swung open with a light push and he staggered out into the night.

.

.

.

Sakura fixed him up pretty good but it was still sore. His hips, his insides, the place where the skin had been scraped away by the step on his back. His eyes from crying. But he loaded himself with pain killers and went to training in the morning after sleeping on the couch.

Naruto trained very carefully without getting reckless or too physical, spent a lot of the time practicing his aim on targets with kunai. And no one said anything but he could feel the _need _to say something coming off Sakura. He desperately hoped she wouldn't but when it was time to warm down Sasuke went to touch Naruto's shoulder to get his attention, about to tell him something, and the blonde shrunk away, his stomach churning. He hadn't meant to and it was the first obvious thing he'd done all day, he had been avoiding Sasuke being near him but that, _that _had not been subtle like he was trying to be. Apparently Sasuke had noticed though and asked him with a closed face, "why are you doing that." Naruto was staring at him, horrified. He didn't blame Sasuke for what he had done and if Sasuke had needed him that way last night… But he couldn't stop himself from flinching when he touched him. He didn't know what to tell the raven.

'_I'm scared of you' ?_

_'I don't really like your touch right now' ?_

_'It's nothing' ?_

In the end he didn't have to say anything. A few seconds after the oh-so innocent question had left Sasuke's mouth, Sakura exploded in rage.

"Maybe it's because you fucked him till he bled and couldn't walk!" She screamed at Sasuke, taking quick steps towards the man who stumbled back slightly in surprise-"what?" and then looked to Naruto, accusations in his eyes, like if he hadn't told Sakura what had happened last night she wouldn't have guessed from the state of his body that she had tended to.

But Sakura wasn't having any of that- whatever it was, act or no.

"Don't give me that shit Uchiha Sasuke. I know you love him but that was not love! That was rape you big idiot! No wonder he doesn't want your hands on him! I can't believe you would do that no matter how bad things were! He didn't want it Sasuke kun! He didn't want it!"

The three stood in silence, Sakura's panting filling the quiet. One more moment before she snatched up her things and stormed away from the training grounds.

Naruto and Sasuke went home together without the exchange of words or eye contact. When they reached the apartment, they took showers separately and then Sasuke cooked them dinner in the kitchen while Naruto sat waiting at the table so that he didn't have to answer the man when he called him to eat.

Silence throughout the meal.

Afterwards, Sasuke studied a large scroll at the table and Naruto polished kunai on the couch.

Sasuke slept in the longue and Naruto in the bedroom on the floor rather than in the bed that night.

And the night after.

And the night after.

They hardly said anything to each other and Naruto was glad Team 7 wasn't called to action or summoned for any training sessions for the rest of that week. He tended to his bruises and scrapes by himself in the bathroom, awkwardly trying to reach the raw spot on his back and the blue spots on the insides of his thighs toward the back.

One day near the end of the week, the silence broke. Naruto was in the bathroom after a shower with the door slightly ajar to let the steam out, applying arnica to the bruises and then suddenly Sasuke was in the corner of the mirror watching him. Naruto jumped and turned, flustered, to face the raven. He saw something flicker in dark eyes.

"H-Hey," he said, voice jumping. Sasuke said nothing and didn't ask permission to come in but did so anyway, coming to sit on the edge of the bath behind Naruto, the upper part of his face still visible in the mirror. Naruto swallowed loudly and moved trembling fingers to massage the cream into his side.

More silence and Naruto was pretty ready to admit that he probably couldn't take much more of this deafening quiet between them.

Setting the arnica down, he moved to take the small dressing off the step wound on his back. He stretched his arms awkwardly around himself, trying several different ways and grunting in effort but his muscles were so tense he couldn't get them to work properly and his fingers wouldn't reach the tape that was holding the gauze in place.

"Here, let me help you." Sasuke's words were so soft that Naruto stopped breathing and froze, unsure if he'd actually heard it. But there was the groan of the bath as Sasuke shifted his weight off of it and there he was, properly in the mirror behind Naruto. Tall and pale in a way that made his skin look kind of grey.

"You don't have to…" breathed Naruto but Sasuke shook his head and they met eyes in the glass. Naruto flinched at the sight of his own expression. He looked so surprised and anxious and hurt, all at the same time. His eyes were wide and painfully blue under troubled eyebrows, mouth turned down at the edges. He squeaked at Sasuke's fingers making circles around the dressing on his back. The raven's eyes had moved away from Naruto's and were looking to his hand on the blonde's back. Circles above the line of the towel slung low around his hips. His thumb smoothed the sodden medical tape.

"You're supposed to take it off," Naruto murmured and Sasuke obeyed, flicking a nail underneath and pulling the tape up slowly. After he removed all four strips, the gauze flopped into Sasuke's awaiting hand and he reached around Naruto to set it on the counter.

"And put a new one on…" prompted the blonde. Sasuke retrieved the fresh gauze and the tape.

After that there was nothing but the sounds of the tape and Sasuke quietly redressing the wound, using the tape with one hand and his teeth, the other hand holding the gauze in place, his fingertips hot on Naruto's skin through the soft dressing. The tape didn't roll and stick to itself as Sasuke, with just his one hand, made strips. They didn't twist or sit uncomfortably on the sensitive skin of Naruto's back…

They had patched each other so many times. They were masters of this kind of thing.

Sasuke smoothed the last piece of tape onto Naruto's skin and then looked up. Naruto felt the raven jump in surprise and saw his face suddenly change to horror. Or worry. He wasn't quite sure. And then he realized why. When Naruto shifted his eyes to himself he found himself crying. He was red in the face and tears were pouring down his cheeks. He hadn't even felt it but his lips were trembling and when he blinked his eyelashes stuck together too long. Sasuke's hands moved away from him and Naruto thought he was going to leave but very hesitantly, the other came back and touched his shoulder. At the contact Naruto let out a loud noise that sounded tinny in the cool bathroom, his shoulders buckling forward, his head dropping into his hands and suddenly he couldn't control his crying. His knees felt weak and just as he thought he was going to go down he felt strong arms wrap around his waist.

"Naruto." Sasuke called him by his name somewhere near his ear and the blonde let himself be turned until he came to bury his face in Sasuke's neck, his smell, his skin, his hair.

"Sasukeeeee," sobbed Naruto hoarsely and Sasuke rubbed his back and held him tightly as they broke the silence. Naruto wasn't sure if Sasuke had cried but he had heard the repeating whispers of "I'm so sorry".

Afterward they lay in the empty bathtub together, Sasuke in his soft navies and Naruto in his towel, Sasuke pillowing Naruto's sore body.

"I'm sorry, Naruto. I never meant to hurt you. I just… I don't know. How can you ever trust me again, I'm-" Naruto cut through Sasuke's strangled, lost apology, smiling the best he could, his lips were dry and his face felt tight from salty tears.

"I know, Sasuke, I know." He could feel Sasuke holding his breath in his chest before:

"Know what?" Naruto craned his head backward to look toward Sasuke laid behind him and showed him his weak, tired smile, earning a similar grimace in return.

_'It was wrong but I won't blame you. And we might not be able to smile properly right now. But it'll be ok. Because for some reason, I love you, you bastard.'_

"Everything, Teme."

* * *

_Something like that anyway. _


End file.
